It looks like BB20 is going to block feeds until BBAD, the fuckers. So I’m going to recap this hot mess of a scripted show while I wait.
We start with Mercedeh going to visit Reza on his job site where he is completely redoing a 1940s house right down to the studs kind of like Kenya did on RHOA. Reza is going suburban on us. Maybe he really is getting ready to start a family.
Holy Crap! Golnesa goes to see Dr. Will from Big Brother for a tattoo removal! She got Shalom tattooed on her body. She said on WWHL that she ended up stopping the removal process because she decided to keep it. She is still wearing his ring too. Shalom is a fine tattoo to keep. Apparently, the removal process is very painful. It takes between seven and nine painful appointments to get the tattoo completely removed. She was smart to just keep it.
Nema and Mona go on a dinner date. It’s weird. Nema tells Mona that he is going to tell his girlfriend Erica about Golnesa. Nema already has one divorce under his belt. How old is this kid? I mean, I guess GG does to, so?!
Reza and Mike try to walk their dogs together. Reza is starting a hair care line with some people he met at the dog park, as the story goes. It’s supposedly coming out soon according to his social media. His investment in the process, will delay the baby making process that Reza really doesn’t want anyway according to my sources.
Mercedeh is planning he wedding and I am irritated that she is calling herself Mercedes to random people. Despite the show being about Persian people, Ryan Seacrest Productions told Mercedeh and Golnesa to go by Mercedes and GG to make them “more relatable.” That irks the piss out of me which is why I always include their ACTUAL NAMES. Mercedeh wants to be a forest nymph in an enchanted forest for her wedding. She wants a seven layer cake. The cake is based on 1992 Versace. She is planning the whole thing in a month. Production must have been OUT OF THEIR MINDS over this.
Nema and Erica go on a walk with Erica’s dog. And he confesses everything that happened in Big Bear. He feels terrible. He tells her there was “almost a kiss.” He’s leaving out the part about how hotly he pursued her and how attracted to GG he was. Frankly, my gaydar goes off with this one but he’s Persian and my gaydar is really, really good but only on American men. Apparently, Nema’s ex-wife cheated on him. Erica was his friend during his marriage and divorce. Nema and Erica decide to take a break. It’s all so fucking scripted. Clearly, Nema was cast as GG’s love interest this season.
MJ’s dad is at the very end of his life. It’s so sad.
Destiney is going on a date. Destiney’s father went back to Iran and apparently got killed. Her date Alex is smoking hot. I love him. He’s Iraqi. I love these too together.
Shervin and Golnesa go out together to drink. Everyone else joins them. Nema announced that Erica dumped him. She’s still in his house in Beverly Hills and he is staying in Venice Beach. Some old fat guy is promising GG the moon.
Reza is chopping down blooming trees. WTF? Is he insane? Reza is not telling Adam he wants to sink “$500,000” of imaginary money into this fake ass hair care line.
Mike is apparently trying to rehab his image with some sort of homeless people blanket hand out but he managed to have an accident with the truck. Everyone arrives to help. They have blankets and socks. MJ and GG are too pissed at each other to participate. I think this is the first time I’ve seen these people care for others. Good job.
Mercedeh and Golnesa have a sit down meeting at a meditation garden. MJ says that she is pissed that GG shat on Reza’s happy announcement about being her best man. GG is furious that MJ threw Shalom’s ex-wife in her face. Sorry, MJ. You know I love you but that was a VERY LOW BLOW. MJ wants to bring up Shalom and his past, and GG loses her mind. GG says everything that MJ does she is going to shit on it. I don’t blame her a bit. GG wants to fight on her. They almost come to blows. Yet somehow they make up.
Next week: It looks like MJ’s dad dies. MJ has a meltdown shopping for dresses. GG files for divorce. Erica and GG come face to face.