Shahs: It’s My Party And I’ll Make You Cry If I Want Too

Nema and Mona must know someone in production because we are starting an episode with the newbie siblings waking up after their wild night in Big Bear. At least they are in separate beds. Nema is “crushing hard” on GG. He might want to get to know her a bit before destroying his long term relationship. I love Golnesa but she’s a handful and a lot work comes with that pretty face of hers.

This morning we actually see Reza cooking. I feel bad for doubting him last week. Perhaps he is a good cook making all these fabulous breakfasts.  At breakfast, Golnesa clearly did a wake and bake. Perhaps it is from her new pot line Woosah. This is a real business and she works at it (unlike the wig thing or whatever it was with her sister). She is unable to form sentences. She tells Sherv that she is “plagiarized by his cologne.” And it just gets more nonsensical from there.

Before the gang scoots out of the cabin before the 12 pm departure, Reza announces that he was asked to be Mercedeh’s Man of Honor at her wedding. People are as enthused with this news as I am when I have a noon check out. I am not a fan of mornings. GG wants to know how Tommy feels about MJ having a Man of Honor who has “had his dick inside of her.” Because that is how friends react to other friends’ good news. Suddenly, she is coherent as fuck. Mercedeh is not amused. She asks Golnesa if she actually wants to be in the wedding or be invited at all. Stop ruining her day, Golnesa! GG bolts out the door. 

Dayum! MJ bought a gorgeous house. I’m so proud of her. It has a beautiful deck with a pool where Tommy is chatting with Vida about the wedding. MJ returns from a run and tells Vida she is not doing the wedding march at her wedding.

OMG! I have never seen a wholesale candy store. It’s amazing. MJ is hosting a Valentine’s Day party and Destiney is doing the party planning. MJ is setting up a dating profile for Destiney.

Mike has also bought a house. He’s completely remodeling the whole thing. Reza is acting as project manager. Reza is frustrated. He’s also making the landscaping decisions. After things didn’t work out with Mona a few days ago. Mike has decided in a week that some girl named Morgan that he dated before is the one. She’s 25.

Nema actually lives with his girlfriend. Mona is her best friend. AND she runs three of his companies. He’s out with Sherv, Reza. and Mike while Golnesa is out with Destiney and Mona.  Golnesa and Destiney mention to Mona that the dynamic she has with her brother is a bit odd. Golnesa says that nothing happened with Nema and it’s ridiculous that he is going to tell his girlfriend. This is such storyline BS. The guys all leave Nema stuck with the bill.

Mercedeh and Vida go to an appointment with her fertility doctor. MJ has frozen embryos with Tommy. I am so excited for this! Vida is trying to control the timeline. She’s afraid MJ’s dad will die during her pregnancy and she would not be able to handle it. The doctor guides Vida to be more positive.

It’s time for MJ’s Valentine’s Day party. One of many things I love about Mercedeh is her body confidence. She is not the cookie cutter LA shape and LA is a city that pressures people to look a certain way, and she walks into the room in a dress with side cut outs that fits her form beautifully (unlike sometimes when I want her to go up just as half size) and owns the room. After I typed that I hit play to hear that Vida loves her look tonight too. MJ says that’s a first! Vida is always critical. As am I. She NAILED this look.

Adam sets his eyes on Nema and Mona for the first time and mistakes them for husband and wife. I should point out in their defense, they are not really doing anything creepy that you could put your finger on, it’s more to me like they interact as twins. I have twins in my family and they are very close and touch each other and have inside jokes that make everyone else seem like they are missing out on the nonverbal conversations they are having with each other. It’s an extremely close sibling relationship. But with siblings who are not same sex, it’s kind of odd.

Mike brings Morgan to the party and introduces her to Morgan. Golnesa is drinking scotch. This is not good.  Wow, flashback to season one. Remember Sammy Younai? He used to work with Mohammed Hadid. I used to be Internet friends with most of the Shahs and I went for his jugular when I felt he was awful to Mecedeh one season.  I think we made up a year or two later but I don’t have contact with many of the people on this show anymore except for MJ and Asa occasionally.

OMG. Tommy is not at the party. He is sitting at the hospital with MJ’s Dad so that MJ could have the night out with Vida. Tommy is just the best guy ever to be on reality TV.  MJ announces that Reza is her Man of Honor and calls him to the stage. Then she announces that her male hairdresser and her male fitness trainer are her other two bride’s men. The explains the lack of her not wanting to walk down the aisle in a bridal procession and also her dad is unable to be there. GG and Adam are pissed (because production told them to be) that they are not in the wedding. Adam calls MJ out publicly about it. Adam, I am disappointed in you for playing along with the storyline. But you are a much better actor than MJ.

MJ and Vida have a scripted scene alone outside the venue. Suddenly Vida says she thinks Tommy may not be suitable as her husband. This is also fake. Vida adores Tommy.

The acting is so bad this season. So over produced. These fools never needed a script the first season and then things just got more and more produced from there. The even have Mike dancing with a “like person.” It’s like a circus act.

It that were not bad enough, Reza and Golnesa get on stage and introduce GG to another woman who is “Also married to Shalom.” Maybe they said who WAS also married to Shalom. This may be the cruelest thing I’ve ever seen on a reality show. I stopped a recap last night of RHONY because it literally made me sick to my stomach. But this is having the same effect. Golnesa turns to Shervin and tells him to get her out of there.

Reza comes out to talk to Golnesa. He’s a lying sack of shit. He and MJ are not friends with Shalom’s ex. They have never mentioned anything about her for however many season and or the season GG got married. It never came up once. Now they are suddenly BFF’s with some bitch? It’s all storyline  THAT MAKES NO SENSE so that Golnesa gets to go on camera with this bitch to get back at Shalom on TV. That’s all this is. She’s in on it. They are all in on it. And they all look ridiculous for doing this.  A better storyline would have been GG reaching out to the ex. Women could get behind the whole comparing notes thing. This just make ALL of them look disgusting.

The behavior by GG at Big Bear seemed odd with regard to MJ and Reza. That is not who Golnesa is. That scene was just to set up the story arc. These shows are just not any fun anymore. If you don’t have a brain it’s probably an exciting soap opera. I mean today people thought Tori Spelling was going to be a RHOBH and that Denise Richards is getting a four million dollar contract. These shows are now pandering to the lowest common denominator regarding viewers.  And people wonder why Asa is not playing along with the bullshit this season? She’s happy. She has a man and a baby and doesn’t need all of this manufactured negative energy around her. There is enough bad energy in the world without manufacturing more to stay on a reality show.

MJ has started her gold bangle game. Asa has a slight edge on me there, but I have MJ beat. And yes it is a competition lol. Golnesa cracks up when MJ brings her dying father into it. I was appalled that was part of the script and that MJ was willing to go there.

Next week Mona goes on another date and Nema tells his girlfriend that he almost kissed someone. Y’all this was my favorite show for so many years. I still love Mercedeh and Golnesa, and Adam but I’m not sure I can recap this anymore. We will have to see.