I seem to have totally blocked last week’s episode from my mind. I was thinking this was the first episode. Before we get started tonight I have to say it seems like for the most part everyone comes out the other end of this season with all the friendships intact. Some are stronger than others but based on social media I am thinking the new girls are both good fits. We shall see.
I’m already 20 minutes late with this recap and a nearby gunshot just set off Banjo and my heart rate. Ugh. Sorry. Speaking of hearts, Eddie’s cardiac ablation worked but there are now other areas of his heart causing problems. I’m just glad they buy health insurance. It’s supposedly good in California. All the housewives have to buy private insurance because they are independent contractors (unless it is different in California, I know California laws have a lot of things for people in the entertainment industry.) Anyway, I know a few housewives that don’t buy insurance and that is stupid with the amount of money they make. Sorry. Pet Peeve. I have health insurance envy.
Vicki sent Eddie and Tamra a casserole. Or Chinese food. Either way, Eddie is not having it. Tamra loves that Vicki is groveling. And it may not be gunshots though that is what it sounds like it might be fireworks because it continues to happen. Sorry. Again.
Shannon’s tiny four thousand square foot house she is renting has the most amazing bathroom. I long for a nice bathtub. David is sending Shannon and the girls to Mexico so that she will be in a whole nuther country when he takes his girlfriend to Park City to ski. David might be even weirder than Shannon. I’m just saying. Why don’t rich people know how to pack?
Tamra and Emily go for mani/pedis. What type of manicure involves tinfoil? I’ve never seen that. I HATE getting mani/pedis but I love when it is over. It’s been over a year since my last
confession mani/pedi and I really must go. Oh Kelly shows up. Kelly says she has 50/50 custody one week on, one week off. Emily says her husband is half Persian and Mormon. Wow. That’s a weird combination. Emily says that Mormon men make great husbands. You don’t have to worry about them gambling or drinking and they are good “in the sack.” She thinks Mormon’s don’t watch porn. I have two words for her, Jodi Arias. Because Gina can’t have kids her sister carried her three kids, her husband has two more kids from a previous marriage. Gina tells a heartbreaking story about her attempts to carry a child herself that ends with losing twins at four months. She has nine embryos left and her husband doesn’t want another kid.
Vicki is already emasculating Steve. There is nothing a cop wants less than having his girlfriend declare on national TV that she feels like the man of the house. Vicki wants to apologize to Eddie for repeating rumors that he is gay.
We finally meet Gina at cut fitness. She is the one whose husband is divorcing her. Probably over the show. Cut Fitness hats are the new THE AGENCY hats. Gina’s husband lives in LA. She seems to like it that way. So the divorce can’t be that much of a shock. On the other hand. I’d love a weekends only husband,that is like my perfect set up. Gina annoys the fuck out of me.
In a production heavy scene, Vicki is off to lunch with Tamra and Eddie. This is the most overproduced scene of the episode. Vicki’s face changes all the time. Tamra said that her son came home and said some kid said that his step dad was gay. Vicki tries to quote the Bible. This is all fake. But eventually Eddie forgives Vicki. Then Vicki says “Will you make my body look like Tamara’s?” I wonder what production had to do to make Eddie film this scene.
Gina and Shane celebrate their anniversary. Gina’s lipstick is horrible. She needs to hire somebody for makeup. Or maybe ask Shane to do it. Why are the husbands of this show always the type that have their sexual orientation questioned?
The big explosive ending is that Vicki and Steve went on a double date with Micheal and his new girlfriend. A few times. I don’t know that I would tell my friend that either.
Next week the drama continues and I’m team Vicki. Shannon is hurt that David has a new girlfriend. They all go to Mexico.
Sorry. There was a lot of commotion going on the the hood last night and I got distracted with other things before posting this.