I love when they start the reunion by showing the walk-ins. Shep is already wondering if he should change. Typically, when it comes to Shep, that answer is yes. Change. Change so much. The filming is held up for the taping of Kathryn’s boobs. This is not my favorite look for her. She tends to get a bit Loretta Lynn at reunions when it comes to styling.
Kathryn and Shep have first chair. Kathryn admits to getting a boob job. Thus the dress with her giant boobs hanging out. Why the hell did she put herself through that? Her boobs were fine before. Craig ripped up one of this pillows to make a pocket square and Andy asked for a pillow and he brought him one. I love Craig. The haters can just have a seat without a pillow. Austen brought some of his beer.
Andy starts by reading a statement from one of Thomas’ attorneys, “Along with Bravo, Thomas made the mutual decision not to attend today’s reunion taping as there is a pending investigation. Our client is fully cooperating with authorities on that investigation. He expects to be completely vindicated once the investigation is concluded. He sends his best regards to his fans and his fellow castmates.” The amount of ugly faces Kathryn pulled during the reading of the statement was tremendous. She’s seems to bristle at the whole situation.
When Andy asks how they feel about the Thomas situation, Cameran says it is the right decision. Then Shep says that 90% of the time Thomas is funny, eccentric, jovial, and then we’ve seen that there is a part of him that is not really him. Shut the fuck up Shep. He has multiple sexual assault cases against him. So that big part of him that you really love is allegedly a rapist with multiple cases open against him. Kathryn say she is focusing on co-parenting with Thomas, and that is improving, so she is not going to comment until the investigations are complete. Smart girl. Naomie says that Thomas has always been nice to her but he can be volatile so she too wants to stay out of it. Kathryn again seems irked by Naomie’s “He’s always been nice to me comment.”
Andy wants to talk about how all the women came together to support each other this season and the positive feedback that had from fans. Naomie seems to really want to talk tonight. She says that it was Kathryn and her recovery that tied everyone together. Kathryn says they have all dated guys that have been difficult. She’s sitting next to Craig and he is pissed saying that the women here were treated with respect by him and Austen (he neglects to mention Shep). Shep says that Craig talked down to Naomie and cites an example of where he said, “You may speak now, child.” Craig doesn’t remember saying that and Andy assures him that he did. He conveniently has the clip ready to play as if Shep was told to bring that up. Are we not going to discuss all the crap Naomie did to Craig? Craig is already wound up, perhaps over something Naomie said before filming. He doesn’t usually come in this hot.
Up next is even more with Naomie and her attack on JD. A fan said that Naomie has no room to talk about JD, even if she’s right, because she put up with “Craig’s lies” for so long. I’m already irritated with this Craig narrative where Naomie is some fragile flower being lied to by Craig. It’s bullshit. Craig wants Naomie to name one lie he ever told her. Shep wants to answer for her. Shut your piehole, Shep. This is not about you. The girls all talk about how JD was a womanizer and would spend late nights at his bar with young women. Austen defends him saying he wants more evidence. Austen and Shep are both pieces of shit, so of course they defend Thomas and JD. Liz tweeted after Naomie defended her to JD a tweet that seemed to be written by JD. Naomie tweeted back that Liz had given her full permission to call out JD and laughed about it afterwards. Naomie and Liz have not spoken since the tweet. Andy asks Cameron of the three men on the couch who would she let Palmer date. She goes with Austen. EW.
Backstage, Ashley’s hair stylist wants to know how she wants her hair. She says she is known for flipping her hair when she is nervous. I’m not sure if she is asking to be able to do that, or asking to have it put up so that she doesn’t do that. In the break, Craig asks if Ashley is listening to the reunion. Andy says she is not.
Andy talks about Cameran’s foray into motherhood. She say Palmer is great and crawled for the first time yesterday and she missed it. Presumably, that is because she was flying to NYC to film. Her husband did not attend any birthing classes with her. During her labor one of the nurses eventually told him he should probably get up and help his wife out. All the girls were upset Patricia would not invite Kathryn to Cameran’s shower. As far as the disgusting cake goes, the bakery only agreed to make the cake if they promised never to share the name of the bakery. The design was Whitney’s idea. Andy says he felt bad for Craig that people laughed at Craig’s homemade teddy bear. Cameran say she still has it. Cameran says she did not feel the instant connection when her baby was put in her arms and probably had postpartum depression for several months and she cried a lot. She says in the past couple of months things have improved a lot and she finally feels like a mom. She also felt a lot of pressure to breastfeed and she found it really hard. She quit after three months.
It’s time for Craig’s package which is always mean. Craig’s pinky is still really disfigured. He wears something to bed to try to straighten it and goes to physical therapy. They make fun of his house. They pester him about being a lawyer. He is doing pro bono work now to get his feet wet. What he is not saying is that he doesn’t want to try to open a law practice while he is working so many months on the show for a higher wage than he could make starting out as a lawyer. Then they start with the gay thing. Craig says maybe he should make a pillow that says, “Straight Guys Can Sew Too.” Can you imagine someone telling a woman who is a welder that she is probably gay? Craig says he needs an emotional outlet and it used to be gardening and fixing things around the house but after he had to move out of the house with Naomie he needed a distraction. I’m not even acknowledging the fake pillow situation with Patricia.
Naomie lets the entire world know that one of the deadlines Craig doesn’t meet is with the IRS. She says she is still getting notices from them at her house. That’s a bitch move. Craig is still in love with Naomie for whatever reason.They bicker back and forth. Craig said there was no reason that they broke up and Naomie was tracking him and keeping tabs on him well after the break up. Naomie says that Craig sends her mean texts. He says that was only when she saw the new guy with his cat. Craig says that someone told him last night that she wasn’t really feeling the new guy. The camera is on Kathryn. Kathryn says she did tell him that and that Naomie said that. Craig says Naomie’s whole life is a lie. The things Naomie posts on Instagram are her trying to create a false life. I have reasons to believe that. Naomie says she was talking about Craig. Kathryn says maybe she misinterpreted. Kathryn’s face says she did not misinterpret.
This Craig attack has gone on forever. Now we are going to talk about him telling the life coach he is a good liar and a master manipulator. Craig says that he lies to himself in order to procrastinate. I do believe he is lying right now. Of course Shep chimes in to talk about Craig’s little white lies. So does Cameran. Both Shep and Cameran love to judge people.
Andy moves on to Naomie saying that she spent this season, “feeding on Craig’s soul and stalking him all over town.” Finally. Andy asks if they could ever get back together. She says no. Craig says that he would love to date the person he dated a year and a half ago but she doesn’t exist anymore. Craig says he actually despises and hates Naomie now.
Backstage, the producers prod Ashley to call Thomas. Ashley says that she just talked to Thomas and he told her to be authentic and sweet. Those two things do not coexist within Ashley. I also don’t think she talked to Thomas. She has cameras on her. If she had talked to them they wouldn’t have asked, “Do you want to try to call Thomas one more time?” It seems he was not taking her calls. She says that Thomas has seen her fiery side with him. She says, “I don’t get angry. I get even.”
On to Kathryn. This season she celebrated her second year of sobriety. Kathryn has replaced her cracked phone. Kathryn talks about the awkward interview at Gwynn’s. The other girls say they have interviewed with Gwynn’s and it is really intimidating, Kathryn says it was hard because she knew them. She still works for Gwynn’s as a brand ambassador on social media.
She has 50/50 custody of her kids and has them one week on and one week off. Thomas still has her on random drug tests and she just took one the other day. (My sources say that anytime Thomas gets the least bit irritated by her he sends her for drug tests. Her arms are constantly black and blue for the tests. Thomas uses the tests as a punishment.) This is why she wore a long sleeve gown. Andy asks if she has resentment about still taking the tests. She says not really. But she does feel like it comes from a place of spite with him. Thus confirming what my sources say. She says she gets along with Thomas by just being numb to some of the things he does and trying to be supportive of him during the investigation.
Andy asks about Ashley and she says she has not seen or spoken to her since the Winter Ball. Kathryn says since the cast has taken her in as a friend she no longer has trust issues. Cameran tells Andy that she now sees that when Kathryn first got involved with Thomas, she was still a child. Now that she is a mom when she looks back she has so much empathy for Kathryn and feels like Thomas not only manipulated Kathryn, but he also isolated her by manipulating the rest of the cast against her. Cameran cries. She says she can’t imagine how she must have felt and apologies to Kathryn. All the girls cry. I may have some summer allergies. They play a montage of Cameran treating her like shit. Kathryn is so relieved to finally being understood. This makeup between these two goes on for a long time. It is really emotional. Cameran says that she doesn’t think we even know the half of what Kathryn has been put through. Cameran says she thinks Ashley is a horrible human being.
Next week, Shep and Kathryn talk about their hookups. Chelsea talks about the end of her relationship with Austen and says basically that he doesn’t stand up for himself with Shep. Austen angrily tells Chelsea to keep his name out of her mouth. I guess those two are not besties anymore. Ashley comes on and sits in Shep’s spot across from Kathryn. She says she expects Thomas to be cleared and says he has not been charged with anything, these are just allegations. Naomie says she had no problem calling Ashley an escort and Ashley calls Naomie disgusting. Kathryn expresses discuss that Ashley was inviting Kathryn to spend time with her own kids as if she had some sort of authority over her. Ashley responds, “I’m so sorry I was asking you to spend time with your own children.” Everyone comes for her about Thomas’ family asking to pay for her to go away. They tell her she is anorexic. Kathryn says that Ashley is an unkind, hateful, sadistic person.