I’m not sure if I am going to recap this or not this season, but I thought I’d at least half-ass a recap of the first episode to see if anyone admits to watching this with me. It seems the entire cast is back for a second season. I’m surprised they weren’t run out of the Redneck Riviera on a rail!
Aimee let’s us know that she is finally over her ex by burning all of his pictures. Then she tell he mama she is going” THOTin’, Plotin’, and Trotin’. I’m not sure what trotin’ is but when I lived in Tripoli, we talked about getting the Tripoli Trots after eating bad food at restaurants. Her mama just says not to walk around with her asscheeks hanging out. I hope her mother doesn’t watch the show. She’s all “ho life or no life!” I cosign this decision but she should not be saying that to her mama. Her daddy’s parting words were, “stay out of jail.” That’s a lofty goal for this one.
Nilsa says she is so much more mature this year. I don’t think that is possible. Codi’s new style is gay boyband member of the 80’s. Gus is still doing romance novel covers. He’s done 55 covers so far. He’s the new Fabio. The boys know that Codi is going to be with the girls this year. Is he coming out this season? Nilsa is already fighting to get the bedroom she wants and she is still in the car. Candace has a “boo thang” this season. Kortni somehow has a boyfriend who is still alive. Nilsa brought her Jesus candle, but this year she added some holy water. Aimee continues to try to expand her limited vocabulary. This episode’s word is “belch” which she defines as the elegant word for burp. She also thinks she passed the White House in Georgia. Oh and Aimee is a pedikarian now. That means she only eats seafood.
Nilsa is trying to steal the room that Kortni peed in last season. Why would she want that room? Everyone eventually goes to their old beds. However, Codi and Gus moved Nilsa’s bags on to Kortni’s bed and vice versa to start drama. Codi told Kortni that Nilsa did it. And they got more than they bargained for. Kortni lost her damn mind. Nilsa called her a psycho ass bitch. Because, true. Kortni has punched a hole in the wall, and tried to kick open the bathroom door. They need to start fining these people for damages. They apparently had to pay for new carpet in Kortni’s bedroom last year. Jeremiah lectures Gus and Codi for cause all the drama.
Eventually, Gus and Codi fess up to Kortni and say they didn’t realize she would lose her everlovin’ mind over their prank. She says she was going to break Nilsa’s face. Apologies all around. Time for more booze.
After drinking since the work up that morning, it is finally time to go out drinking. They can barely walk or talk. Especially Nilsa, Kortni and Aimee. Kortni is dancing on the bar for free shots. She doesn’t need anymore shots. Then her boyfriend Logan arrives. Codi tries to hook up Candace. Does he not realize she is a girl? Gus runs into Mikayla who he clearly already knows. They are both from Tallahassee. She is there for three more days. Nilsa and Aimee actually have the sense to know it is time to go home. Or maybe they were cut off. Codi on the other hand puked in the urinal. Gus takes Mikayla home with him next. Kortni falls down in the parking lot and can’t get up. Kirk is trying to help but she is completely out of it. Where the hell is her boyfriend? Apparently, he is still in the bar. Then he sees Kirk messing with her from the back seat. She has her legs up in the air and can’t even sit in the seat properly. Logan comes out and starts screaming at Kortni for making a fool of herself. Is this their first date? Because this is how Kortni is on every single episode. Just when everyone is in the van, Kortni gets out of the van to chase down her boyfriend who has told her he won’t be with her if she acts like this. It’s like herding cats trying to get these morons in the van.
The previews for the season are too insane to cover. Aimee goes off in an ambulance, one or more of the guys gets arrested. It’s insane.