In case you missed it, the RHONY mid season preview is up today and I hate Dorinda more than ever. I am not a fan of the mean drunk. I’m mean to a lot of people here because they don’t respect my carefully crafted environment. But I don’t treat my friends like that when I am drunk. I generally profess my undying love and devotion in embarrassing detail but hardly ever get in a fight. Unless I am dating them. But that’s a whole nuther talk show. Also I drink on the job here… CHEERS! but would not be getting drunk in public.
I’m gonna be honest, I am missing the premier of my favorite reality show, Big Brother to get this recap up in a timely fashion. So I plan to do this recap really quick and dirty so I can get back to my Big Brother recap. I’m just obsessed with that show. Sorry.
Lu is pissed that Ramona posted a photo about her being out of rehab after 21 days. Everyone is at yoga except for Dorinda, Tinsley and Carole. Dorinda already wants wine. Dorinda is mad at Sonja because she wears the Morgan family crest. Really Dorinda? What’s it to ya? Leave people alone? Bethenny offers her publicist to Luann. That was kind.
Dorinda approaches Bethenny alone and tells her she doesn’t want any negativity between them and asks her if there is anything wrong. Bethenny says that she doesn’t feel totally safe with her. Ah, I identify with Bethenny so much in this moment. Dorinda says sometimes she doesn’t feel safe with her but she thought that they got past that. See that is a difference between these two. Bethenny’s feeling unsafe is not Dorinda’s unsafe. Bethenny says to us that she feels like Dorinda is latching on to Carole in order to come for her. We will see more of that later in the season. I think it was a commenter here who compared Dorinda’s talking head with the piano to Liberace and now that is all I see. Anyway, they hug it out. Bethenny hasn’t been the target of bullies in many seasons (many of which, she herself was the bullly) so she is struggling with this situation
Tinsley and Carole go for massages and Tinsley is having trouble relaxing. I recently had a massage and need to go like once a week for stress but never do and I have the hardest time relaxing mentally. I can let the massage person bend me like a pretzel and karate chop me and my body is relaxed but relaxing my brain and trying to meditate to the mediation music is impossible. Ramona and Sonja can’t shut up during their massage.
When Carole and Tinsley go for a walk in the gardens I start to believe everything Aviva said about Carole is true. She pretends she is “working” as a writer but can’t get a simple five hundred word essay for Cosmo done on time? My remedial college students had to crank those out in a 50 minute class!
Luann and Bethenny lounge after their treatments by a pool, probably salt water, and talk about Lu’s sobriety. Luann says she is going to AA meetings and is focused on her goal. Tinsley tells Carole that she tried on wedding dresses with her mom. This is storyline and not a very big deal. Luann talks about Tom having a party on the boat where they celebrated their engagement and how it hurt her. Bethenny mistakenly blurts out that Ramona still meets up with Tom for drinks. OUCH. Bethenny also pointed out that Ramona never feels badly for her missteps with the girls and has hollow apologies. That’s a sign of a narcissist and or a sociopath. Ramona has ZERO compassion. Luann says she doesn’t want to get all worked up because it makes her want to smoke. Bless her heart she had to quit smoking too? I have given up alcohol for lent many times, and honestly it’s not that big of a deal. It’s like giving up chocolate or potatoes. It’s fine. And a great forty some odd day diet. But smoking? I gave it up once for a year for a guy I was dating and then, the second I dumped his ass, I bought a pack. Smoking is way more addictive than booze in my experience.
It’s time for dinner and that means staged fights prompted by Bravo. I would have sat at the head of the table. That’s just me. I don’t like sitting with people on both sides. I need to see what is going on. But no one wants sit there and someone nominates Carole for the position. Everyone is dressed up and Carole is ONCE AGAIN in pajamas. Does she have Hugh Hefner’s stylist?
Bethenny brings up Tinsley’s wedding dress promotional ad because production told her too. Bethenny tells us she keeps her wedding dresses to paint in. Please. Bethenny has people for that. I’m bored with this conversation and pissed that Bethenny had to say the name of the store for promotional time. Bethenny says it is just like trying on coffins. That is hysterical. Bethenny says she wasn’t insulting her but it was just an example things you don’t try out unless it is happening.
AND THEN. Carole says Bethenny was dating Dennis for two weekd before they were both at Harry Winston’s looking at engagement rings. Because that is exactly like trying on wedding dresses. I have looked at engagement rings at Tiffany at a very young age. You need to be armed with information before hand to lead the guy in the right direction. And why does Carole keep on spilling the tea on Bethenny about things that happened when they are close. I recently parted a close friendship and I would never air any personal information about him.
Suddenly Sonja goes off on Dorinda about the family crest shit and I just can’t with this. Lu says people in jail are better behaved than this. Bethenny says why to you care? Dorinda once again tells Bethenny to stay out of the argument. This a season long issues with Dorinda. She wants to be able to attack people without Bethenny defending them. Did I imagine that scene where Dorinda wanted to make nice with Bethenny and they hugged it out? Is it any wonder that Bethenny thinks, Dorinda, Carole, Tinsley and Ramona don’t like her? Clearly they do not! So stop with all the fake hugs and just hate on her. Eventually, Dorinda flips entirely and apologizes to Sonja and promises not to do it again and says she won’t bring it up again. But Dorinda and Bethenny continue to go at it.
Luann then brings up the fact that Ramona tweeted out a photo saying that Lu was out of rehab and back filming with the girls. Ramona fake apologizes, smirks and pretends she didn’t know the effect of it. Then Ramona tries to fake cry. She apologizes. Then Lu brings up Ramona going for drinks with Tom. Even Tinsley says Ramona was wrong for this. Even Dorinda says that drinking with Harry was wrong and clearly Dorinda hates Lu from what is coming this season.
Lu walks out and Carole, in her pajamas, came to check on her in her room. That was sweet. Point Carole.
Ramona says some shit about being triggered from her childhood.
Bethenny , Sonja and Lu end up in bed together. Carole tells Dorinda to just let Sonja do her shoes. Sonja’s shoes are actually gorgeous and if anyone wants to send me a size ten, I’d totally wear them to Publix. I am actually sort of wanting to buy a pair but I really need to try on shoes.
Time to pack it up! I really do want to stay in this place once Banjo goes to doggie heaven. Ramona, Carole and Dorinda are all gravitating for a reason. This was a weird show about fighting and since RHOA was the number one Bravo show, they are planning to beat it.