We begin with the guests arriving to dinner two hours late. This is another group that wants chicken nuggets and fries. It’s like they have never eaten adult food. They are still serving at around twelve fifteen. They literally ask for french fries. Then they want huge sparklers for candles that set off the fire alarm and woke up everyone after one am. Captain Sandy is pissed. Sandy really tore into Hannah as if she had set the boat on fire. Brooke and Jamie get stuck on clean up and don’t get to bed until nearly 5 a.m.
Kasey is on breakfast duty alone. She’s finally stopped throwing up every five minutes, but is still pretty clueless. She doesn’t know how to make a bloody mary so she wants to wake up Hannah. Hannah is pissed she was woken up because Kasey could not handle two guests. They literally ordered a water with lemon and a bloody mary. I can’t believe how much I am feeling for Hannah this season. Don’t I usually hate her? I’m surprised she hasn’t murdered Kasey yet. Later, Kasey ruins a load of Hannah’s personal clothes by putting the in the dryer.
Sadly, the storyline for Conrad is to be so lovestruck he can’t perform his job. He is a terrible actor. Sandy seems very genuine in the role of overbearing captain. Oh my God. Now she is kissing Joao’s ass. I see a promotion for him and a demotion for Conrad coming. Especially when the storyline turns to, “Captain Sandy discovers the relationship between Hannah and Conrad and is livid.”
Captain Sandy apologized to Hannah for being so hard on her about the fire alarm. It just freaked her out because she’s had a boat fire before in the red sea and it was super traumatic so the alarm is a trigger.
Brooke is missing her sister’s wedding back home so she is in a foul mood and doesn’t seem to want to even try to do her job. She seems to have a lot of guilt over missing out on family things. I get that. My mother had me at 39/40 and dad was three years older. This meant that when I was in my twenties and thirties and wanted to travel the world and teach overseas, it meant I might not be able to get home if they had serious health issues. So I didn’t go. You feel bad either way.
The guests were given at least four or five entrees to choose from as well as copious amounts of french fries and other side dishes for lunch at 4pm. They would like a kosher Shabbat dinner. And a milkshake with whipped cream and a variety of other drinks in between. I am exhausted just watching them eat. Soon they are in a food coma and I am not sure they have used any of the water toys that Captain Sandy was having a conniption fit about not being set up fast enough. At dusk they want to go out in the banana boat.
The Shabbat dinner goes well. These guests are very demanding, but they are always polite. My God now they are sending steaks back to be warmed. I do like rooting for the crew this season. Sometimes they seem really awful and you feel bad for the guests.
The next morning, breakfast looks amazing. Unfortunately, Kasey is on service and doesn’t provide silverware. Or drinks. Or any sort of placemat. Or napkins.
Meanwhile, Captain Sandy is kind to Conrad and lets him call the anchor pull and drive the boat for a bit. There is hope for some decent bonding. For now. She was also quite pleased with the deck crew’s docking.
The guests leave and are very kind to the crew on the way out. Then the primary complains to the captain about stuff. Hannah has been looking into Kasey’s resume. It’s bullshit. It looks like she has been working as a stew/deckhand on two boats for almost three years. But they are day cruises. Or booze cruises as Hannah calls them. They are not yachts. She also claims she knows silver service and has barista training. She has no clue how to set a table. She still doesn’t.
Are they having champagne a the tip meeting? That’s a first. Perhaps it is because they refilmed it a few times after the announcement that they got $12,000 in tips which is a grand each. I would love to make a grand for a three day charter. But Sandy is pissed as well as Hannah. Sandy should not say these sorts of things about guys on TV. Sure, say it at the tip meeting, but not on TV. The champagne was for them to do a toast to Brooke’s sister on her wedding day on a live video.
It’s time for shore leave and hookups. I don’t for a minute think that yachties have some sort of “don’t screw the crew” rule. Or the guests for that matter. I think they are just as horny as nurses and teachers. Allegedly. Anyway, if there is such a standard they are all breaking it. Brooke has decided that Adam is her best bet for getting laid since Joao has gone for Kasey after she pushed him away. Then there is Hannah and Conrad who I love together. Why is it that we never see Colin on these shows? He’s such a cutie and never really shown. Is he shy? Conrad asks Hannah to go out to dinner. Aren’t they literally at dinner? Did he mean in the future or was he joking around? Either way, the crew goes out clubbing and they are allowed to pour shots in each other’s mouth straight from the bottle. This will not end well.
Brooke has to swag in her game at all. Adam doesn’t seem to have any idea she is into him and is ragging on her like the little British sister he never had. Hannah is drunk and tries to shove her tongue down Conrad’s youthful throat at the club. He tells her that he doesn’t like to be that sloppy couple in public and tries make sure her boobs aren’t falling out. He may be 23 but he is the responsible party in this relationship. That said, Hannah forces a very public kiss in front of his crew. PARTY FOUL!
Next week: Hannah expresses her undying love to an amused Adam. Kasey may be dumb as a box of lint but she seems to be smart enough to move on from Joao to Colin. NO! NO! NO! Back off Colin you brazen hussy! Captain Sandy finds out about Conrad and Hannah and starts putting him through the paces. Captain Sandy seem to really hate Hannah this season. I suppose it is some residual nonsense from last season that I blissfully do not remember. Hannah confronts Kasey about her bogus Curriculum Vitae.