Let’s hope this week’s title refers to the relations between the crew and not another group of nasty women. We are back with the crew just back from their drunken land outing. Joao, as it turns out is even more of a misogynist drunk than he is sober. He was highly inappropriate with the ladies at the bar, and then topped it off with standing over Hannah in the van on the way home hurling insults at her. Generally, the Bosun would have stepped in to reprimand him but since that didn’t happen with Conrad, Adam had to do it. Now everyone is drunk eating in the kitchen. Conrad tries to explain that he didn’t think it was appropriate since they were off duty and Hannah is quite upset. Not bitchy Hannah being a bitch upset. She’s a bit unsettled because some man (I use the term loosely) was standing over her berating her for no apparent reason on the ride home.
Adam and some of the crew are eating ice cream on the floor. Joao decides that he wants to stick his fingers in the container. Adam puts a stop to that and when Joao continues to be an asshole, Adam throw him out of the galley.
Brooke apparently doesn’t care what a piece of crap Joao has presented himself as. She’s been broken up with her boyfriend for hours now. Her gaping hole of need is not going to fill itself. Joao is giving his best drunken lines to Brooke that she is falling for hook, line, and sinker when Hannah comes in to go to bed. And immediately leaves. So much drama. I much prefer crew drama to guest drama.
Joao says when he is blackout drunk he becomes Jezabob. Brooke calls her mom to cry over her old boyfriend and tell her about who she has her sights set on now.
The problem with the next guests are that the primary is friends with Captain Sandy. Does this mean two lesbian cruises in a row? I am sensing a theme here. Jennifer is a vaginal rejuvenation doctor in LA. Sandy moved to LA at the end of last season. Make of that what you will. It’s her birthday and her friends have asked for a huge desert bar. Oh and the weather that is rolling in is so bad, they may be docked for a day.
Brooke tells Joao that they need to cool things off so she can focus on her job. Hannah figures out that Kasey doesn’t know how to sort laundry, let alone operate the machines. I just took forty pounds of dirty bathrobes, sweats, pajamas and sheets to the fluff and fold. But when I go to my sister’s I can’t operate her fancypants washer and dryer either.
Captain Sandy tells Conrad to offload the tinder before another boat comes in and boxes them in. She says he will and then goes off to smoke and giggle with Hannah. Meanwhile, I’m watching Kasey try with all her brain to properly fold a towel. She’s not successful.
This charter is going to be completely docked. Captain Sandy is livid that Conrad didn’t get the tinder launched in time so now they can’t even take a ride on the tender. This may be the worst charter ever and Captain Sandy is already pissed because she has said many times that this is her friend that she wants to impress. Perhaps the “womanizer” that Jennifer bought her will cheer her up. It’s a vibrator that seems very boring and acutely focused. But whatever gets you off as they say. Sandy wasn’t to thrilled by the on camera gift giving. But how would Jennifer get a kick back without it?
Someone didn’t get the salads that Adam made on the van. Hannah will be in trouble for that. Kasey doesn’t know how to vacuum a floor. Hannah will be in trouble for that. At least Joao has apologized to Hannah. Joao has still been a shitty lead deckhand. He is insisting that someone needs to be on watch 24 hours even if the boat is docked. Conrad has said it isn’t necessary. Most of the crew is working their asses off. Except for Kasey. Joao continues to make advances toward Kasey after being told to stop. The food is a hit. Kasey is impossible. All Colin has done is practice a rap this entire charter. It actually came out kind of cute.
Since Hannah was up late cleaning up the heel marks from the girl who insisted on wear heels on the boat, Brooke is stuck doing breakfast mostly by herself because Kasey it seems can’t even pour a co-cola and hasn’t bothered to learn the guests names. Sandy was a bitch about getting her toast on time. Isn’t she supposed to support her crew rather than cause more issues? Clearly, we don’t need to buy that vibrator as it is clearly not working. Then she goes off on Hannah for trying to order provisions for the third charter. Sandy wants her to go down and make sure everyone has their breakfast drinks. Hannah leaves the bridge in tears.
Next week: Hannah and Conrad become more than friends. Jaime is at her breaking point when it comes to Joao and the deck. The situation between Joao and Conrad escalates. Sandy is on the wrong side of every issue. If you had told me last season, I’d be on Hannah’s side this season, I would have laughed. Yet here we are. Kasey and Joao both need to be fired.