Okay, it’s 0 Dark thirty in the ghetto on a holiday weekend. Unfortunately fireworks are not just legal here, there is a fireworks shop on every corner. This means one thing. Banjo is losing his damn mind and as a result so am I. So I will be recapping this over much loud and persistent barking.
Oh my, nothing lifts my spirits quite like a hot, young, shirtless man painting. I’d like a full hour of just that please. We don’t need any talking. Just stand there a paint.
Reagan is finally home from law school. She wants us to know that any cunty behavior we have seen thus far is simply because of the stress of law school. I really hope that is true. We really need some likable females on this show. It’s Easter in the big easy, so Jeff and Reagan are going to throw an Easter party by Bravo. Jeff seems a bit happier with some time away from Reagan. Hopefully, this is a clean start.
On the other side of the bridge, Tamica has thrown her back out and could not report to her TV hosting job so her friend Susan has brought over some takeout. I do not understand the photo of Tamica’s family that Susan pulled up. Is this supposed to be some computer generated thing that Rani made? Susan says that Rani has color dysmorphia and thinks that her mother is white and that is what she is supposed to look like. Tamica doesn’t get it and doesn’t she that she appears to be white in the computer photo. I really think that is a far reach for the reasons for Rani’s unhappiness. Her mother got so depressed after she was born that she moved out of the house for several months. He mother is very insecure and constantly seeking attention for herself. He mother doesn’t seem to see Rani as a major priority. That is what is wrong with Rani. Her mother could be purple with pink polka dots and that would not change the situation with Rani. On the other hand, Rani is the only black child in her school. That can be an issue.
When I mentioned that Jeff and Reagan were going to have a party, I should have known that Jeff would be doing all the work, and Reagan would be hiring a glam squad. Jeff seemed happy about the party. But when he goes wine and cheese shopping with Justin, he seem resentful that Reagan wants to have a big party instead of using the down time from law school to be with him. That is because he is not part of her future plans.
Gian has stopped talking to Barry. Supposedly, it is over the incident where he called someone a faggot. Barry is hurt. He is even more hurt that Gian has decided to be BFFs with Jon now. Barry feels Gian is doing this just to spite Barry. Tamica now hates Gian even more.
I love that Reagan is doing the cooking for her Easter party. I can look at her and tell she knows how to cook. Everyone arrives at the party dressed to the nines. but only Jeff is in the mesquite southern male attire for Easter, seersucker. I love a man in seersucker. The other guys all look hot, as in uncomfortable and sweaty. Jon invited Gian as his plus one. Because, Bravo. Tamica tells Reagan she is not happy that Gian is there. Reagan actually offers to ask her to leave. Tamica declines but says she will be having words with her. Reagan is pissed that yet another one of her events will be a Tamica shit show.
The party proceeds amazingly well. Reagan lets everyone know that while she is finishing up in the kitchen, they can all play a game of croquet. I probably haven’t played that since Easter was held at my parents backyard. No one is very good at it but that is not the point. It’s a good group activity that gets everyone up and interacting. Next up is an adult easter egg contest. There are bottles of booze and tubes of lube and big fake engagement rings. Of course Tamica makes sure to taunt Kelsey about not being engaged in front of everyone. He back sure seemed to be dipping and doing just fine out there scooping up all the prizes.
Barry tries to talk to Gian about how hurt he is and she just keeps blathering on about how actions have consequences. Barry tries to explain that if she was afraid what he said would somehow besmirch her business, he understands dissolving their partnership but what really hurt him was that she just stopped talking to him and never even called him to get his side of the story. I don’t agree with Tamica much, but she is right about Gian. Gian seems very thirsty and our quota of thirsty bitches on this show is already way over filled.
Reagan’s dinner had shrimp and grits and quiche and all sorts of delights and received rave reviews. Jeff gives a toast that says this is a new beginning for him and he loves that they have all become his new family. Tamica points out that Jeff and Reagan are the only white people on the show. I truly did that notice that. I am not kidding. It seemed really weird of Tamica to bring it up though. Then suddenly Tamica starts crying real tears about Rani being the only black kid at her school. Awkard. But it seemed sincere. Apparently, the white boys at school were taunting Rani. Now I am obsessed with what color everyone at the table is. Is Kelsey white? mixed? Cajun? I never really paid attention to this before.
After all of that emotion, Tamica pulls Gian aside to find out why she has frozen Barry out of her life. Basically, Gian blames Tamica for Barry’s behavior. She gets really snarky with her and basically says she doesn’t even know her marriage is over. Tamica needs to film with Gian more. It makes her look better by comparison. Gian storms off and talks about how Tamica told her she doesn’t have any emotional intelligence and is just jumping from one opportunity to the other. Justin doesn’t understand what she means because Gian was helping Barry with financing his business. Let me help you out here Justin, Gian wants to be on the show. She got on through Barry. Barry said something very wrong and damaging on TV. So now she has jumped over to the hot painter boy. It’s just that simple.
I need to know more about this almond cake.
Reagan and Jeff had a beautiful toast and exchange of I love yous after everyone left. Reagan was very kind and supportive of Jeff and actually listened to him. That was so good to see.
How is it the season finale already? I WAS JUST STARTING TO NOT HATE THESE PEOPLE!
Next week: REAGAN IS PREGNANT! Jon will definitely be painting topless! Drama continues with Gian. Kelsey may have reached her limit.