I’m looking forward to seeing Bethenny do her thing in Puerto Rico tonight; however, taking Dorinda with her was a big mistake. Not only did she embarrass her in front of her philanthropy partners, when Dorinda gets back she is going to dumping fuel on the fires that are already burning between Carole and Bethenny. I am not thrilled about the real time bond between Carol, Dorinda and Tinsley. But it is what it is.
So I’m just going to cry through this whole Puerto Rico stuff. It’s just heartbreaking. I would have had a hard time spreading the wealth and would have just handed fistfuls to the first people I saw.
Wow, the jolt of going from that to Ramona and Sonja is bad for the nerves. They are in a big limo headed to do a promotional for some store. It’s a thirty minute drive. Sonja misses Ramona but I don’t think Ramona cares about Sonja anymore. They do seem to have drawn up a temporary truce.
Luann is just starting to work on her cabaret show. Luann once sand on Broadway for Liza Minnelli? Is this like the time that Madonna came to Sonja’s fashion show?
Oh we are back in Puerto Rico. It’s dark out now There is no electricity. The people are staying this is the first money the have gotten. The money that is supposed to be going to Puerto Rico is not getting to the actual residents. Or at least was not at that time.
I got all confused because I realized I didn’t have any photos and now it seems like we are at dinner with Bethenny and everyone except Dorinda who was too sick to come to dinner. Bethenny kind of brushes off talking about Puerto Rico since Dorinda is not there. She wants to hear all about Chicago with Scott. It was great, and they are back on. Sonja shows up late and Bethenny and Sonja start chatting about some guy that Bethenny fixed her up with who she enjoyed going out with. Immediately Carole and Tinsley start trash talking Sonja saying that Frenchie’s contract expired. Sonja can of course hear all of that. Bethenny feels sorry for Sonja. Bethenny sticking up for Sonja really pisses off Carole and Tinsley. Carole has the nerve to say something about Bethenny and mean girl gossip. That has to be about another subject entirely because Carole and Tinsley were just enjoying meangirling Sonja within the earshot of Bethenny and Sonja. Carole and Tinsley are the mean girls at the moment. Bethenny tells Carole she always chimes in for whoever is sitting next to her and tries to speak on her behalf. That is a very liberal quality that bugs the hell out of me. I hate when people are offended on behalf of some other person or group of people who they think they have to defend because the other person or person is so downtrodden and helpless. It’s offense to the person they are being offended on behalf of.
Carole is writing a little blurb in Cosmo for their online page. She says she could write a #metoo about that Hollywood producer, presumably Weinstein who apparently told her if she would rub his nipples for 30 seconds he’d come. Gee, Carole. thanks for sharing. She seems very flippant about the subject. Carole has a problem with deadlines. It’s like 500 words. She’s a professional. What the hell else does she have going on.
Bethenny and Dorinda go out for lunch. Dorinda seems VERY AWAKE. Bethenny says she asked Adam to come do some photography and publicity for Puerto Rico and he wanted to be paid. She says no one else that she has asked for anything asked to be compensated. When there was no pay, he was not interested. Bethenny says that she and Carole have been a bit off. She is focused on Puerto Rico and Carole has more in common with Tinsley because they are both single with no kids.
Sonja is one of those people who fell for whatever interior decorator started karate chopping the tops of pillows. I laugh at those people. Sonja has Lu and Ramona helping her paint some outdoor furniture. I can’t believe they actually painted it. Can they come to my house?
The all cast is a party for Carole’s friend Duff who wrote a book on chronic pain. Perhaps her chronic pain is by wearing a giant metal elephant cock ring as a bracelet? Because that was the hostess gift. Le sigh.
Ramona starts telling Carole right away that Bethenny called her a puppet. Carole was there for that conversation and she knows Bethenny didn’t say that. I love how Ramona included herself instead of Heather as one of Carole’s puppet masters. In her talking head. Ramona says that Carole is in denial. It could not possibly be that Ramona is simply full of shit about what she is saying despite the fact that we had more video footage to remind us exactly what was said earlier in the episode.
Drunk Dorinda manages to knock over a glass or two at the vodka fountain. I am floored at how good Bethenny is at making Dorinda drunk! Bethenny is just now getting out of the car and she already has somehow pour alcohol down Dorinda’s throat and has he looking like a fool. However does she do it? Is Dorinda embarrassed? Of course not. She says that is actually good look when a guest starts breaking the stemware. You know who else thinks that everything they do is magnificent? People on coke. Don’t ask me how I know this. But I do miss being the most beautiful girl in the room that everyone loved and everything I did was perfect. I’m just saying.
Bethenny arrives looking chic in all black with the party in full swing. Is this a good time to mention that Carole is in a leather jacket and biker gloves circa Madonna 1983? Because she is. Carole questions Bethenny about whether or not she called her a puppet. I find this incredibly scripted because the conversation in question was between Carole and Bethenny. Ramona was simply someone at the table. It’s not like Ramona is saying that Bethenny said something behind Carole’s back. They were in a conversation and Ramona’s version is nowhere close to what was said. In fact, Carole repeated it back to Ramona and corrected her. So is this really all Carole has when production tells her to stir the pot with Bethenny?
Again with the choice of attire. New York is super snobbish about being on the cutting edge of fashion and being the fashion capital of the world. So, why do so many of these housewives miss the boat? I’m looking at you now Tinsley.
Oh HELL YEAH! Next week is the Berkshires where it all goes down. Drunk Dorinda has confidential envelopes for all the girls. It’s going to be a murder mystery party this year. I’ve sort of always wanted to go to one of those. Sadly, I think an actual death is possible at this particular party.
Tinsley pulls Sonja aside to try to put the past behind them. Tinsley is very grateful and apologetic. They hug it out. How long until Sonja fucks it up again?
Drunk Dorinda wants everyone to know that Tom threw a New Years Eve Party in Palm Beach on the same yacht the engagement party was on the year before. No wonder LuAnnn lost her shit in Miami. Flashback to Dorinda’s drunk toast on the boat. Flash forward to Drunk Dorinda pleasant day.
Carole the princess thinks banging on a wine glass is a civilized way to the attention of party guests. It’s especially tacky when the glasses are plastic and the banging knock the foot of the glass off.
I don’t understand why there are tacky shoes and handbags all over the walls of this place. It’s supposed to be a rental space for parties. It looks more like a Pay Less Store.
Next week: It’s a murder mystery party in the Berkshires and things with Bethenny and Carole BLOW UP!