By CJ Bomb
And then there were six…..and one woman left standing. Please Helen, don’t let me down this week. Now that the manic pixie is ousted (Joshua) It’s just Helen, Edmond, Stanley and the sister wives left. They are all exhausted at this point and seem a little slap happy.
The designers are sent to Times Square and see Project Runway on the marquee of The Hard Rock Cafe. Two places in New York where you won’t find a New Yorker. Just crappy food and misguided tourists looking for rock stars and settling for old Elvis costumes. They are going to do something that’s never been done on Project Runway All Stars, performance wear! Well this should be interesting. I still have PTSD after they tried this on a regular season with that poor band from Canada. Google it if you don’t remember because I’m never talking about it ever again. Edmond is excited and thinks he’s going to rock this challenge (see what I did there!) which means he will either win or go home.
The designers have to pick a track on a jukebox and whatever style of music plays is the genre they will be designing an outfit for. They don’t even get real songs just generic elevator versions of pop, rock…..and country? Oh crap. Anthony and Ken both get pop. Alyssa trying to bop her head to this generic crap is the laugh I needed today. Helen and Fabio get country?? Crap. Stanley and Edmond get rock and Stanley is very happy. I have no idea why. There will be a winner and loser in each genre as this is a head to head challenge. They have $250 (good) one day (of course) and the winner gets to design a limited edition T-shirt for Hard Rock (um, yay?) AND get a four day trip to Hard Rock resort in Cancun Mexico (this sounds horrible to me as I am picturing a lot of drunk spring breakers). Anthony and Ken are good friends but each will cut a bitch to win. Helen has no idea what to do with country. I feel her pain. At least Rebecca Minkoff is guest-mentoring while Anne is off giving useless advice to someone else.
Anthony is sketching a short kimono dress. Ken is doing a jumpsuit with an overcoat. I’m not sure that reads popstar but what the hell do I know? Helen thinks “fun and flirty” when she thinks of country music. And peasant dresses. Fabio has designed for Chris Brown (not sure I would admit that dude) so he’s sure he can figure this out. The go to the balcony of the Hard Rock above Times Square and Helen is carrying a guitar for some reason. They probably made some couple in denim jean shorts and capri pants from Kansas thrilled as they think there is an actual band up there.
In Mood Stanley laments his expensive taste and having to go up against Edmond as Edmond “likes his sexy girls”. Edmond is buying some very Vegas friendly fabrics. Helen buys sequins. I have a bad feeling about this. The designers return to the workroom and realize how much space they have now that there are only six of them left. Helen gets to draping and Fabio mentions he almost picked sequins but didn’t. Probably a wise move Fabio. Ken and Anthony are fake sniping at each other. Anthony is hysterical as he tells Stanley that he was supposed to monitor how many pieces Stanley was making and if he got over three pieces tell him to stop. Stanley is up to five. Anthony yells at him to not go crazy. He’s like a fiesty aunt.
Helen tells Ken his pants are looking a little wonky from her perspective and he brushes her off. She feels overwhelmed by all of the attitude and personality in the room. There is a LOT.
Rebecca Minkoff comes in and the designers are very happy. She tells Helen she needs to maintain a country feel because her look my be confused with pop….because of the sequins. Don’t country music singers basically wear the same thing as pop stars these days? I have no idea as I would rather stick a fork in my eyeball than listen to modern country music, but if someone would let me know it would be very helpful. Fabio is doing a romper. Rebecca tells Fabio to make one item really stand out. She asks Anthony how his pop star will move with the perforated neoprene he’s using. She tells him to practice Beyonce moves while wearing garment. Rebecca is worried about Ken’s timing with the amount of work he has to do. She tells Stanley to think what he will have to eliminate if time gets beyond him. She tells Edmond to pick a lane as he has a LOT of elements in his look. He feels as though he knows who he is designing for and is going to make it work and get it done.
Stanley is now freaking out about time. Helen is freaking out about sequins. Fabio is looking at Helen’s garment and feeling a lot better about his chances. The only one who feels really confident is Edmond. Stanley calls his pants perfection. Anthony has made 13 minute black bicycle shorts. Ken is making a high-waist panty to cover his model’s hooh-hah. Helen is lying down on the floor asking her dress to make itself. Anthony thinks she is losing it. He might be right.
On the day of runway everyone is scrambling per usual. Why is Fabio wearing a statement necklace from the Luann Countess collection? I actually don’t mind Helen’s as it looks like something a goth chick would wear to perform country music. It’s just SO much of a weird hybrid. Edmond feels as though his look needs one more element. And that element is fringe. Ken compliments Anthony. Anthony thinks Ken’s model looks like she is wearing an adult diaper. I just want to take the sleeves off Helen’s dress and shorten the skirt. Stanley thinks Fabio’s model looks like a pretty girl going to a club with her daddy’s credit card. He’s not wrong.
Alyssa does her big pose before walking out which looks idiotic as always. A white fringe jacket? Sigh. Olivia Culpo is the guest judge. I have to google her. She’s a former Miss Universe. She’s very pretty and seems to know what she’s talking about.
Stanley’s model looks like the Bratz “rock and roll” doll. Edmond’s looks like she is at a Steven Tyler look alike contest. Edmond to win this. I can imagine someone like Taylor Swift wearing Fabio’s but it’s pretty simple. I now want to rip Helen’s sleeves off and have a straight skirt and wear it to a party. I think Helen will be in trouble for this. Fabio for the win. Anthony’s dress looks like one of those hideous outfits Beyonce’s mom used to make for Destiny’s Child. What was the name of her brand? House of Dereon. (thank you google) Ken’s model looks like Celine Dion during her Vegas residency. I don’t care who wins this honestly. This challenge sucked. Edmond will win and sadly I think Helen will go home even though I think Stanley’s sucked more.
Georgina thinks Stanley’s look was matchy-matchy and looked contrived. She loves the ease of Edmond’s look. She loves the open back. Isaac thinks Stanley’s striped leather looks like a men’s tie and he wants to spray paint it neon yellow. He thinks Edmond’s looks like a glamorous rock star and it looks great under the lights. Olivia thinks Stanley’s is too cute and Edmond’s is very captivating and fluid. Alyssa thinks Stanley didn’t take a risk and Edmond created a look for a woman OR a dude. Edmond wins the face-off.
Georgina thinks Fabio’s is cute but “too on the nose” huh? She’s very impressed with Helen’s bodice but the sequins make it look cheap. Olivia prefers Fabio’s look and likes the way the fabric catches the light. She thinks Helen’s sequins are too dark. Alyssa was worried when Fabio got country but she thinks he pulled it off. She thinks Helen’s look a bit “renaissance fair”. Isaac thinks it looks like a country singer going to a bar mitzvah not a performance and thinks Fabio’s looks like a country star going to a pool party. He’s obviously not impressed. Fabio is the winner.
Georgina thinks Anthony did a really great job but Ken ALSO did a great job. She loves the cut and drape of the coat. Isaac loves the showgirl front and gymshort back of Anthony’s look. He likes Ken’s better but doesn’t like the coat. Olivia is given life by Ken’s look. Maybe she isn’t so smart after all. Alyssa thinks Anthony went traditional and Ken was forward thinking. Ken wins.
Edmond wins for his costume. Helen loses for her costume. I am sad and pissed. I think they should have been able to choose their genre. I’m officially annoyed. The season that never ends is down to five people. What did you guys think?????