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You are here: Home / Entertainment News / UnReal: Shield

UnReal: Shield

March 6, 2018 by tamaratattles 11 Comments

The suitress, Serena, has decided to attack her role like an executive. She has gone through the trash and gotten producer photos of each of the guys and stolen some sticky notes to keep her notes on. Quinn is furious about this. They give her a poker game as a group date and she beats the pants off all the guys and belittles them.

Obviously, this require Chet to explain to her how to be desirable to men. It boils down to two things, making cookies and giving blowjobs. Serena has decided to defer to Chet and try a new approach.

Chet’s bimbo of the week, Crystal, has decided to suck up to Quinn. This proves that she is indeed profoundly stupid. To make things worse, Chet is telling Crystal all of his deep dark secrets that he never told Quinn. Chet says his relationship with Crystal is true love. Quinn drinks heavily for the rest of the episode.

The suitress and her suitors.

Serena insists on a one on one with Billy the race car driver. I think it is hysterical they have a race car driver considering everything that happened on The Bachelor last night.

My favorite part of this show is the new shrink guy who is possibly an undercover officer. He gets the titular phrase this week when he tells Rachel that she seems to be using her “essential honesty” crap as a shield. He also says that she needs to turn her essential honesty on herself and stop blaming everyone els for her issues. I believe that is what we call brutal honesty. Rachel didn’t like that very much. The Russian guy tells Rachel that she has a Russian soul, it’s dark. She seems to like that very much.

Gary arrives to find Quinn falling down drunk. He doesn’t say much about it because the Russian dude and the race car driver get into a fist fight. All hell breaks loose and Quinn is thrilled with the footage. Then the race car driver managed to get a cell phone to call his lawyer. In order to keep him from suing, he gets an infomercial for his car gadgets line and a week of safety.

Jeremy seems to be very protective of Owen, who is the only genuine guy on the show. Rachel mocks him for coming back to protect the good guys. Meanwhile she has been eye fucking with manbun for days. They even lay in his hammock together and stargaze. Rachel decides to head back to the truck she sleeps in before things get too heated. According to her essential honesty program, sex is a lie and must be avoided. Do we know why she sleeps in the truck?

Then we see Quinn lusting over manbun from the control room and Rachel deciding to go back for seconds. Quinn swoops in and scoops up manbun and takes him off to her office before Rachel can get back. So now we have two producers fighting over manbun to look forward to. Manbun and Quinn get straight to fucking on her desk with most of their clothes still on. Game on.

Next episode, the manbun and Quinn continue their sex tryst and Rachel finds out.

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Filed Under: Entertainment News, Lifetime, Recap, UnReal Tagged With: Entertainment News, Recap, Unreal

About tamaratattles

Come for the tea. Stay for the shade. Not for the easily offended. You're a special snowflake just like everyone else.

Comments

  1. catazure says

    March 6, 2018 at 9:17 pm

    GAHHH! I missed it! This used to be “must-see Tv” for me but the lack of episodes has allowed my affection for the show to wane…

    Reply
  2. HarmonyHW says

    March 6, 2018 at 9:29 pm

    I think Madison is the one who will go nuts this season. She must be jealous of Chet’s new squeeze. And she’s ambitious.

    Rehab for Quinn? Two bottles of vodka is a lot!!!!!

    Reply
    • TheArtistFormerlyKnownAsYoya says

      March 8, 2018 at 10:34 am

      I don’t think she cares about Chet. But I hate her. I hope she gets hers…

      Reply
  3. Debra Disney says

    March 6, 2018 at 11:25 pm

    I have been watching Since the very 1st episode. I cannot for the life of me figure out WHY Rachel lives in the truck!!
    The second episode is reminding me how good this show is. If you aren’t watching UnReal – you should be!

    Reply
    • The Lady Cocotte says

      March 7, 2018 at 5:11 pm

      In season 1, Rachel’s roommate kicked her out for being an asshole. She was broke (all her money went to the show for smashing their car during her first mental breakdown) so she moved into the truck. Now I think she does it as self-flagellation of sorts.

      Reply
      • tamaratattles says

        March 7, 2018 at 6:13 pm

        Thanks, it almost dosen’t even seem that weird anymore. I mean we don’t bat an eye at manbun living in a hammock.

        Reply
      • Debra Disney says

        March 7, 2018 at 6:14 pm

        Thank you, Lady C!
        Mystery solved. I hope they run S3 & S4 consecutively. Lifetime took WAY too long between seasons, in my opinion & will lose their loyal viewers if there is another delay.

        Reply
  4. Cathyrid says

    March 6, 2018 at 11:44 pm

    I forget when it’s on. I like the show just can’t ever catch it on time. Will wait for it on On Demand. Oh well.

    Reply
  5. Gretch says

    March 7, 2018 at 10:18 am

    So happy this show is back on!

    Reply
  6. UTattleTale says

    March 7, 2018 at 10:23 am

    This is a great show. Glad for the recaps!
    The show allows me to “peek” behind the scenes on the cutthroat producing shenanigans that goes on with these reality shows.
    I know, I know, this is a scripted show, but I think it does pull some of its material from some real-life stuff that goes on behind the scenes with these reality shows and the producers and show owners who put them out.

    Reply
  7. Liz says

    March 7, 2018 at 1:01 pm

    I love the transformation Madison has gone through, I went from feeling sorry for her to possibly hating her! That was so sad when Quinn found out the truth about Chets dad.

    Reply

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