I normally wait until Friday to recap this show because I want to watch my Shondaland in peace. DO NOT SPOIL ME IN COMMENTS OR YOU WELL HAVE THE WORST SEAT IN THE WLS. And in case you haven’t noticed there are a lot of folks banished there at the moment. But I can’t really enjoy it on Friday’s anymore because that is when the cleaners come. I will be composing some instructions this week that include hurry the fuck up and get on your way in Portuguese because the house is is good shape as far as the basics go and they are going to need to wash floors, windows an doors for the most part this week.
I can already tell you that Angele gets removed from the program next week for blowing her cover to Gabrielle. Let’s get started. What is that smell? Oh yes, it’s the Mexican steak and rice bowl I put in the oven before Top Chef started two hours ago. No dinner for me. Fuck.
Matt’s Exit Interview
He starts by ranting about Tebow and the bloods and how he felt like if he didn’t leave he was going to get violent and it would put his son in danger. He says that when the guy who is intimidated by the bloods get back on the street and does something violent, it is the fault of the admins of FCJ. And he says there was no response to his emergency button when he pushed it repeatedly. Colonel Mark promises to act on everything he told them. I am not sure I believe that anymore.
South Annex
Angele has Justin Bieber Complex. I remember when Justin was such a nice boy who was discovered on Youtube and now he is just… a full blown hot mess. Celebrity fucks with people’s heads, man. She’s just the hot bitch on cell block C and she’s already ruined. The entire pod went to rec so these two could go after each other alone.
At rec time everyone goes to rec except for Angele and Gabriella. They are in love and she is this close to blowing her cover. WTF? Ha! They show a bunch of shitty white houses in the ghetto on the interstitial scenes and they all look like my She Shack.
Angele asks Stephanie if she has ever fucked anyone over. She says no. Can I point out that Stephanie is now sporting the hair twists of the Orange Is The New Black character Crazy Eyes. There is so much to say about this. I don’t have NetFlix, I already have too many TV shows, but I do know that one Halloween everyone was Crazy Eyes. And Stephanie HAS crazy eyes so this if fucking hysterical to me. Angele tells Stephanie that she “went all the way” with Gabrielle. As an aspiring late in life lesbian, I’m really not sure what that means and quite sure I am not interested in doing it. I just want someone to fix things that break and watch TV with me and stay on their side of the bed at this point. Anyway… Angele says she thinks she will be with Gabrielle outside the jail. THIS IS WHEN THEY SHOULD HAVE PULLED HER, Bitch is full blown criminal. She’s “in love.” Stephanie is so going to roll on this bitch. You know she feels like she in on Survivor (BTW check out Cho’s recaps here, he’s awesome). She wants to be the last bitch standing.
Later, in Angele, cell an inmate named Sahar who accuses someone of taking her coffee. She calls everyone lowlifes and dirty asses. She is pretty and taking away Angele’s street pretty. Angele decides to defend everyone and Sahar tells her to decide if she is a man or a woman. There will be hell to pay for that comment. Sahar complains to the cameras that Angele and Gabrielle keep her up with their sex sounds and sex noises. Then back in the cell Angele tries to show out. Sahar is not having it and Angele jumps up and puts hand on Sahar! No fucking wonder she gets yanked. This shit is unacceptable. Cut to Stephanie saying “for her to forget who she was…” Bitch, Angele was dead wrong but your black ass should have been right up in there defending her,
500 Zone
Alan is having a really hard time with the drug situation in 500. He also can’t deal with his new roommate Dre who is a little bit off. Dre seems to be hallucinating. Or, you know, on Meth.
The next day, Dre was initiated into the bloods by having the holy shit beat out of him in a remote cell. Alan is just over it and wants to go home. He gives the distress signal. Production tells him he is at 40 days. He says he doesn’t know if he can do it. He does want to finish but he is not sure he can. He has a breakdown. He misses his wife and baby. He doesn’t want to quit, but he is not sure he can do it. The producers tell him to stick it out for his family. Well not really but it was implied they do ask if he wants to leave.
Andrew calls his dad for the first time since he tapped out. Andrew tells his dad he was being paranoid about him being in danger and he is fine. Matt admits in an interview that his son is stronger than he is. I think this will help their relationship. I the beginning, Matt felt like Andrew needed to toughen up. That was why he brought him into the program.
Nate overhears Rabbit and O’Neil talking about getting meth into the zone. Can I just sauy it doesn’t look like O’Neil has done a ton of me recently.
The show flew Alan’s wife in to try to get him to hold strong. His wife tells him to hang in there and not quit and she had pics of their kid. She tells him he will regret it if he quits.
Nate and Alan are back to finding out about the meth situation. There are five and ten dollar bumps. Isn’t that lovely my ATL friends the problem is the entire jail is complicit with it. So it’s whatever. This show is not going to help anything. It’s a crooked system. There is no way any of this is news to the people running these prisons.
600 Zone
I’ve been wondering why we haven’t seen this zone. A guy named Allen has been trying to get in touch with his wife. She has not been answering. Buchi has continued to antagonize his captors. Allen disrespects the female officer and for whatever reason, Johnny tells him to stop being disrespectful. The officer thanks him and says to just let it go. After she leaves, Johnny wants to whip his ass but dumbass Buchi gets in the way. I want to see Johnny beat this kid down. Johnny says the whole experience reminded him of his father disrespecting his mother and he let it get the best of him.
by Next Week: Angele is going home for blowing, or possibly blowing her cover.
Angele has Justin Bieber Complex. So funny and so true. I really enjoyed this review.
Lmao I really enjoyed this review also. Funniest review I’ve ever seen
I had so much hope for Angele, she seemed to have her sh*t together when she went in, but she’s lost it completely. I can’t believe Stephanie, frickin’ STEPHANIE is going to get her wish of being the last girl standing. At least she’ll have to stand on her own two feet when she is.
Seriously, there’s something fundamentally wrong with Stephanie. Her gleeful wish that Jackie would go home, her insistence that it’s not in her character to screw someone over, just everything about her screams that she’s missing some vital part of her brain. Annoyingly, I think she’s too far gone to take any criticism on board, you just know that at the reunion she’ll be crying that the editing was bad, that she didn’t do anything wrong, that everyone is ganging up on her. And she’ll walk away from it grinning, thinking she’s won.
No wonder she’s never had any female friends. It’s so telling that she didn’t even flinch when her mother was crying in her first episode – I put it down to a bad relationship at the time, but now I think there’s at least one bad person there.
I was surprised at Johnny this episode. I think now that he doesn’t have to constantly calm Matt down, he’s able to concentrate on other things and is getting wound up himself. It doesn’t help that he doesn’t respect Emmanuel (though that’s totally understandable), but Emmanuel did well this episode, holding his cellmate back without resorting to his usual theatrics. We’ll see how long that lasts.
I hope Alan doesn’t get in real trouble for buying drugs, if he goes through with it. As a policeman he’s probably used to undercover cops getting a pass for things like that, but I don’t think he has that protection on this show. He’d better flush whatever he gets right away, and have a damn good tweaker act ready to cover for it.
Nate is far better at this stuff than Alan is, and it’s telling that none of this season’s participants have clocked Nate. I didn’t like the anti-gay stuff that Nate was saying the other episode, but I really hope it was just part of the act. I’d like that to get picked up and discussed at some point outside of the jail!
Andrew calling his dad paranoid made my day! It must be a relief to have seven siblings, at least Andrew doesn’t have to deal with that intensity full-time! Brazil must have seemed like heaven. I kid – Matt really brought the drama this season, he was so much fun to watch. He’s a terrible Christian (constantly wanting to beat people up instead of relate to them) but I’m convinced his heart is in the right place, really.
Thanks Tamara for these recaps, I love your take on everything!
I agree about Nate and the anti gay stuff. Really turned me off to him.
I feel like your reading my mind. Except, I don’t remember Nate’s homophobic comments… unless your talking about him telling Andrew the others thought he was gay, and he was trying to protect him there. What’d he say?
Also, I almost feel like Stephanie is going to tell Gabi and get things shut down due to her “Survivor (the show) complex” It just sounds like something she’d do because of her lack of any understanding what the show’s purpose is and her lack of any human emotions… just saying.
Sorry! Late back to this one. The inmates were sitting around the table, discussing homosexuality, and Nate said something along the lines of, it’s not wrong to be gay but it’s wrong to have sex/do anything about it. That’s how I interpreted it, anyway!
Actually, thinking about what I just wrote, I think Nate might have been sending a message to Andrew, like “I don’t care if you’re gay, but don’t do anything about it in here because there will be trouble.” I hope it was more like that than his honest feelings!
I could watch this show all day. It is the frustrated sociologist in me. Matt washed his hair, yay! he looked marginally better. Stephanie DOES remind me of Crazy Eyes a bit.
Are the prison officials actually WATCHING this? I know the producers are, but how can the prison staff let this go on, the drugs especially. They told Matt that they were watching his son, but I really have my doubts.
I have often wondered if I should have studied Anthropology. I think ‘I’m right there with you on that. I am both offended and drawn to this show. Well, at least I was. If I decide that it’s become a total reality show, I’ll probably stop watching… just like I did after the first two Survivor shows. I was really hoping that this show could be the start of some meaningful change.
Angele’s situation has had me very concerned about how the show is going to portray it’s response… though I have to say that when you go back and watch earlier episodes, there was a big missed opportunity when the cameraman was trying to get info from her about her growing relationship. It almost seemed like he was egging her on to pursue it, while she seemed to be waiting to get approval from him if it was going to be okay. Thus, the immaturity part. If he had reminded her of the bigger picture, I feel that she may not have gotten out of control.
As far as Stephanie is concerned, if she does end up there, as the lone female participant, that may change everything. We may get to see a more humble side of her. I think ‘she’s still learning.
Nate seems to think that his last cellmate made some kind of bond with him, but when he left the cell, the look on his cellmate’s face seemed more like he was just humoring him. I wouldn’t judge him for going home. He seemed too timid to be in jail, to me, from the start. I wouldn’t want to worry any more.
“Buchi” is still in a learning curve, I think. He is trying to be opposite to Johnny. I appreciate Johnny’s side about trying to be a good example… with positive reinforcement when he sees something good (He is good looking, BTW), but Buchi is trying to use negative reinforcement when he sees something that he sees as bad. Both can be right IMO.
Nate is a different situation. I can’t help thinking that things would be so much different if he hadn’t found that playing basketball with some of them would gain him such respect. He still hasn’t had to “prove” himself. He almost did with the cellphone (?) problem when it got broken.
That being said… everyone knows about the cameras. The question is, how would it be with no cameras at all. That would be a different reality. I feel that there would be much more gang activity, and just overall bullying.
The drug issue isn’t simple. On the one hand, the whole distribution problem leads to all kinds of dangerous situations, but the more complacent the inmates are,.. the less problems the officers have.
To bring up another observation… I think ‘it’s so interesting how some participants will say “my cellmate knows that I have his/her back”, but then when they need them… not so much. Oh… well, I didn’t mean when I might get into trouble. Lol. And ….
None (or at least a very small percentage) of the cellmates in any episode, in any season, really looked like they were going to miss any of the participants. They mostly seemed like “don’t let the door hit you on the way out”, if anything. What do you expect after 60 days? Trying to humanize them doesn’t mean to paint them with a magical brush. There are things that they’ve probably done that they need to “have a time-out” for.
‘Treated as humans… yes… set free, or rewarded,.. no.
OOps… correction. Not Nate’s cellmate… Alan’s
IMHO, the cameras don’t seem to be a deterrent at all. Nor are the producers. When the women were making drugs and having parties, they stood right there explained the process to the producers like they were talking about shopping for groceries.
right, but when the staff see the drugs, they dont seem to be doing anything about it either. are they waiting to get more intel, or do they just not care if someone OD’s from this?
Elcie, Thank you, I was so upset. That producer or was egging Angele on. I turned the channel I was so upset. That producer gave me the creeps. He seemed to be enjoying all the info from Angele. I stopped watching the show because of that. It gave me the impression that the show was encouraging and Angele’s bad behavior. The moment participants start doing drugs and having sex the program should be shut down. I will not be watching this show which was one of my favorite shows anymore. That was creepy and out of line the way that producer was questioning Angele. it made me feel like the show purposely put Angele in that situation for ratings.
That whole situation made me gasp, aware suddenly that there wasn’t anyone with the camera crew that was there to keep some semblance of control. This whole set up was so dangerous. I know it’s not prison, but clearly there is plenty of potential for danger. Seriously?
Angele is majorly flawed, she should have been pulled immediately upon developing an intimate relationship IN JAIL! WHAT THE F? Sofa king messed up!
‘Did a little internet search and it says Angele is studying to be a writer. That’s not what the show says. It says ‘she’s an electrician. That raises more questions about her motivation.
I think things at the Atlanta jail are worse than we see. I do know someone who ended up in there briefly. He said he was scared to death. The good news is that this is a jail, not a prison so inmates come and go faster than in prison. Maybe they are out before they kick those Gus Butts. BTW, if anything had started, my money was on Johnny, not Matt.
I was so impressed with Angele at the beginning. She seemed level headed and focused. She totally lost it when she found a girl friend. The girlfriend had never been with another woman. Something tells me that the woman will head to man territory when she gets out. I might be wrong but poor Angele. If she does move in with A, she may find out that they are 2 totally different people. Angele is smart enough to know that liars and manipulators are in jail.
Obviously she’s not that smart. She’s proven herself to be quite the simpleton.
” The girlfriend had never been with another woman.” Did she say that on the show? How do we know this, Mackie?
I think Angele said it on the show in one of her interviews. I erased the DVR version so if I find time I will watch it again on Demand. I was fairly certain but I could be wrong
Meh, Don’t go to all the trouble. I’m like 87% straight and I thought she was hot before she went all convict.
It we did time in the pen though… I can’t say I would drop to 49% straight.
LOL
I think Angele is *high* on the attention. What use has she been to this program, other than pointing out the obvious that women hook up in jail? Someone else mentioned that the producers weren’t being serious enough with her about this during their interviews. It sems they will have to pull all the participants when they pull Angele. Word will get back to the men’s ward through guards or other inmates.
I agree with you. Gabi is only ‘gay for the stay’, she too is intoxicated with the attention. That will likely end when her options open up again., especially if she goes back to using.
? I hear ya
Ok, I’m just going to say this…those guards and that sheriff know exactly what goes on in that jail…It wouldn’t be shocking if a few of the guards were bring drugs in…OH PLEASE…I know what I’m saying…there was this tuff Lutenint lady guard working in the jail on Maui some years ago and 1 day the Feds raided the jail and she and 2 or 3 other guards were arrested for drug trafficing and some other charges…when the sheriff is interviewing and taking notes and (acting) surprised at what they’re being told by the participants when they “tap out” I’m like oh brother, how fake…they’re making a TV show !
That jail is nasty…and I felt bad for that cop kinda b/c he was weeping but where the heck did he think he was going, Disneyland ???
And that guy who left his son in there…what’s with him? wow! His son was doing ok in there so far MUCH better than the Dad did.
Angele when in there and lost her mind !!!
I hope they’re getting a nice check for going in that nasty jail…I wonder how much.
What is going on here? Johnny’s fighting; Angele’s fighting, having sex and doing drugs; Stephanie’s doing drugs; and Alan’s thinking about buying drugs. This cast is whacked. (At least Matt washed his hair.) It’s good TV, though.
I love this show, however, I think of it like I think of Undercover Boss. When the camera crew comes around why is no one suspicious of being on 60 Days In? Maybe I am just paranoid. Serious editing must go on because I think many of the inmates suspect that they are on this show and stay clear of the cameras and new inmates during the experiment period.