Because I can’t remember ANYTHING anymore, every time Top Chef shows up on my list of things to recap, I’m surprised and and happy every week. I’m so excited to get to this episode and see what female chef goes home tonight!
Mustache Joe is high off of his win after making wings last week. I need his recipe. I have enough wings in my freezer to start a wings shop! But currently, I am worried about my turnip greens holding up in the fridge until Monday. I bought all the stuff for blackeyed peas, turnip greens and cornbread for Monday and I could not be more excited.
Bruce is not gay? Really? I thought the three bears were all gay. Bruce says he and his wife are adopting a baby. The baby is going to be born while he is filming Top Chef. Could we possibly lose Bruce to homesickness like we did when Whatshername went home to Alaska?
Curtis Stone is the guest chef for the quickfire. The girls are all swooning. Wait, there is a Top Chef Junior that is running on some Universal Channel? I pay for every single channel known to man, because, business expense, why do I not know about this channel?
The quickfire is to make a kids menu item into something healthier. And they have to use kid sized pans, mixers and teeny tiny cutting boards for the challenge. They draw knives and are assigned things like, spaghetti, corn dog, and grilled cheese to update to something more nutritious.
Adrienne made pizza with a cauliflower crust, right away one of the kid judges rolls her eyes. It’s also got a quail egg on it, which is just wrong. But surprisingly, the kids liked it, they are all three kids of famous chefs though so they have a fairly seasoned palate.
Carrie had corndogs. Whatever she made, the kids didn’t like. They are very forthcoming with their opinions which is hysterical. Tu had chicken quesadilla. They love it. Joseph had chicken terriyaki. One of the kid judges told him, “Maybe it would taste better without the pineapple.” Fatima had grilled cheese, she mad sort of a salad with grilled cheese croutons. It was a hit, and also the first dish to really take a turn toward a healthier dish. Tyler had spaghetti and meatballs. He made a Pho but the kid judge says if he had not told him what it was, he’d think it was spaghetti and meatballs. I’m not sure if that was an insult or a compliment. Mustache Joe’s chicken fingers were not well received. The breading was too “cornmealy” for our young judges. Christopher had chicken tacos. The kid judge said it was one of the best deconstructed tacos she’s ever had. These kids speak the language. Tanya made a fancypants mac and cheese and I want it in my belly right now. The kids liked it. Because, she just made mac and cheese with really expensive cheese. Brother Luck has cheese burgers. He made them with buffalo meat and avacado with Jicama fries. I’ve never eaten Jicama and only ever hear of it on this show. The kids loved it. Bruce had fish sticks and basically made fish croquettes. The kids were not impressed.
Carrie, Tyler and Bruce were the bottom three. Adrienne, Tanya and Fatima were the top three. Adrienne’s weird pizza won. My man Christopher was ROBBED!
The Elimination Challenge
The challenge is to cook a dish that represents your heritage. What would you cook for this challenge? I might make hungry boy pie, or maybe shrimp and grits or bring my adopted Libyan roots into it and make a lamb cous cous, even better, I would probably make Brunswick Stew with cornbread.
Brother Luck tells a very sad story. When he was a young boy everyone was asked to bring in a family recipe to share with their class. His father was Creole and he gave him a recipe for dirty rice. He was very embarrassed because the recipe had gizzards (ew) and livers (yum). And then a few weeks later his father died and that is the only recipe of his that he has. So um, I guess Brother Luck is about to win a challenge.
They go to a place where refugees are given the chance to cook food from home and learn how to run a food business. There are a lot of Syrian refugees there, mostly women. One of them explains to the chefs that women are much better cooks than men. Tyler keep on taking the hits this week. He seems pissed by the comment. And cranky. Tu relates to the women, as his parents are refugees from Vietnam.
Tyler says he doesn’t have any heritage, he’s a white boy from southern California. His mom was a healthy cook but food just wasn’t a thing. He does have some Swedish background. Bruce has a Hungarian background. Christopher is doing soul food. I miss my Whole Foods. Joseph is making Italian food and so is Mustache Joe. Tanya is making gumbo. I want Tanya’s gumbo. Please, bring it to my mouf. Fatima is doing kabobs.
Carrie made a pierogi, she is not sure of her heritage but she is from Idaho so focused on potatoes. Tyler made sirloin tips with Swedish pancakes and Swedish meatballs. Tyler’s dish was a miss. They didn’t like Carrie’s dish either. Two white people that have no knowledge of their heritage were destined to fail at this.
Next up, Joseph’s squid pasta and Tanya’s gumbo. They loved the gumbo but were not sold on the pasta.
Mustache Joe presented a chicken tortellini with a farro cabbage. Tu made a “Vietnamese Bouillabaisse ” It is a soup with fish meatballs called Canh Chua. Tu gets emotional introducing his dish, Tanya did as well. Many of the chefs are finding this challenge deeply emotional. The judges found Mustache Joe’s technique to be outstanding and loved his dish. Sadly, they were not fans of Tu’s dish.
Next, Fatima presents the judges wit Dal Chawal with Shami Kebabs. It’s basically lentils and rice with a ground lamb patty on top. Brother Luck gave them stewed chicken with dirty rice and spinach. He’s worried it is too simple. One of the guest chefs who is I think is from Iran says Fatima nailed the flavors but she has had better versions of this dish. Another judge loved both dishes. Tom and a couple of the diners really liked Brother Luck’s dish.
Bruce did a Hungarian goulash but it’s not in a bowl. There were also side dishes I didn’t understand. Adrienne got a bit overly ambitious on her dish and served stuffed pigs trotters with collards and “mustard ham hock jus” ROFLMO and a potato croquette. She wasn’t overly ambitious, she just overly “elevated” southern food and presented something that fuck The Yankee Who Shall Not Be Named would serve at Empire South. They didn’t like either one. Bruce’s lamb was super dry. Perhaps he will see his kid born after all.
Christopher says he is not chefing up his dish, he’s going to stay true to his roots. Good for him. He makes a lemonade fried chicken served with collard greens, a brown sugar butermilk biscuit and hot sauce. ONCE AGAIN, he should win. Sidenote, I finally scored some full fat buttermilk for my cornbread this year. WTF is with all the low fat buttermilk? It’s BUTTERMILK! It’s a hit. I am rooting for Christopher to win this whole thing.
Back in the kitchen, Christopher has made biscuits for everyone and all the chefs are raving. Except for Tyler who still has a stick up his ass about something.
Christopher, Tanya and Mustache Joe were the top three. I really wish they would post the recipes on the website. Especially for Tanya’s gumbo. God they really love Mustache Joe. BUT CHRISTOPHER WON! YES! YES! YES!
Wow, an all male bottom three, Joseph, Tyler and Bruce. Isn’t that the three bears? Please send Tyler home. He’s been a real downer this entire episode.
I really went from liking Tyler to disliking him on this episode. He was not fond of the immigrant kitchen visit, he was irritated by the culinary heritage challenge. He just seemed really off. Perhaps he was dealing with a personal issue? There is always last chance kitchen. Next week, they are taking the group to watch LCK. Or maybe that is on the latest episode, I’m behind. But they are spoiling us on LCK this week regarding who is left.
So I think we should all post a recipe this week. Anyone up for it? What is your heritage? I hope someone here is Creole and is about to post a good gumbo recipe.