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You are here: Home / Entertainment News / Top Chef: Smile And Say Mise

Top Chef: Smile And Say Mise

December 15, 2017 by tamaratattles 21 Comments

The Three Bears

I’m a bit behind because I just woke up from a thirteen hour nap. I am trying to sleep off this stupid nagging cold that continues to linger. So far it is not working. I think I will recap this and sleep a bit more. Perhaps the cold is just an excuse for sleeping under warm blankets during cold weather. I love that they are giving us a peek inside the Chef House this season. That is always one of my favorite parts.

It’s the mise en place challenge. Mise en place is just a French phrase for doing all the crap work necessary to begin cooking. It’s the stuff I will no longer do when I win the lottery. I’ll have a sous chef for that. Then I will waltz in dressed like June Cleaver and do the actual cooking and seasoning. Then I will leave and someone else will clean the kitchen. This is my lottery dream.

Laura’s nerves got to her in the mise en place challenge leaving the team with “the three bears” to win the round and cook head to head. It also left the winning team with only about ten minutes to cook their steak dish. It was crazy fast and hard to keep up with who is doing what. In the end, everyone seemed to have a really good dish that Padma and the guest chef loved. There didn’t seem to be a bad dish in the bunch. The bottom two were Rogelio, and Tyler (that is a surprise, he won last week and if very confident. Perhaps too confident?).  The top two were Brother and Joe.  I was really pulling for Claudette. Chef Joseph won. He is one of the three bears with Tyler and Bruce. Three big guys who room together in the house. 

Carrie bonds with the sheep while contemplating her dish.

The elimination challenge is a farm to table four course progressive meal. Each course must use the secret ingredient that they won’t find out about until they get to the farm. On the trip over, Rogelio seems to be interested in Claudette. So cute. Meanwhile, I was wondering if the three bears where actual bears (big gay guys often with lots of body hair) or if they just like the name. They are all three drooling over the the guest chef, so question answered. There is a creamery on the farm that makes a variety of cheeses. So that is the secret ingredient! YUM! CHEEEEEESE! Let the cutting the cheese jokes begin.

I want to taste these cheeses! They have four cheeses and they need to use on in each course. The team that lost the quickfire has Mustache Joe who seems to be taking over the discussion of what cheese to pair with each course and shooting ideas that other chefs throw out, especially the female chefs. They are the green team for this challenge.  I’m starting not to like Mustache Joe. Laura is particularly distressed by Mustache Joe running the show. Christopher is on dessert with Laura and Mustache Joe is still trying to boss him around. The green team is in trouble. Back at the house, Christopher tries to let Mustache Joe know he needs to stay in his lane, but the message is not received.

Mustache Joe

Mustache Joe is very cocky when Tom comes and he makes fun of Tu when Tom shows him a better way to tie up the lamb. Later Joe is more concerned with correcting Tu than focusing on his own dish.

The blue team has a fish course. I don’t know if I would have done that with a cheese component requirement but they seem confident and everyone is all in. Adrienne is running the fish course and has done fish and cheese pairings before.  Claudette looks up to Adrienne, but Adrienne is confused as to why Claudette wanted to cold smoke the fish, yet she doesn’t know how to do it, so Adrienne is having to teach her to do her part. The fish dish is not going well. Is this a good time to say I told you so?

I can’t believe I am still sleepy. I really do have narcolepsy at times.

It’s time for service.

Up first is the blue team’s fish dish and the green team’s cheese and crackers. I mean I love cheese and crackers and this is a very high-end version of the concept. But still, could you not have called it something else?  They used the rind to make the cracker and the creamery judge loves that. It looks like a hit. Padma actually asks the guest chef if she can have the rest of his cracker. That’s win for the green team right there. They are not a fan of fish and cheese. Look, I don’t even know why I try to write these recaps because I’m not a culinary expert. Even I know that fish and cheese, two of my favorite things don’t go together.

Literally cutting the cheese (curd) on the farm

For the second course, the blue team made a beautiful pasta dish cooked by Joseph and Bruce with the feta cheese. I am starving just hearing the description. Wait, the green team brings out a ricotta dumpling made by Carrie and Mustache Joe’s big contribution was a butter sauce? Let’s send him home tonight. Sadly, the judge’s loved Carrie’s dumpling and the butter sauce. They also loved Joseph and Bruce’s dish. This one is too close to call.

For the third course, Tu, on the green team has had a problem grilling the rack of lamb evenly. There are many different temperatures going on. They struggle to plate and Mustache Joe whines in his talking head. I believe they also had problems with frenching the rack of lamb before cooking. Tyler and Rogelio on the blue team did a lamb with the Shepherd’s halo cheese melted into some wheat grass and other crap. It looks gross. I wouldn’t eat it and I am not a picky eater.  The green team did a lamb chop with corn cheesy grits. Mustache Joe did the grits. Why is he out there twice? The judge didn’t like either dish. Neither did I and apparently Joe’s grits were sweet.

Finally for the blue team, Brother Love did a blueberry tart which for some reason he cut in half. I want the other half of my tart! It was topped with a ricotta almond and some candied grapefruit zest. For some reason they are giving feedback to the chefs for this round. They like the tart.  The green team Christopher and Tanya, two of my favorites, did a fried dough stuffed with feta ice cream and a chocolate ganache and orange cream. The judges like it. Padma said that Christopher’s dessert that Mustache Joe kept trying to fuck with was probably her favorite desert ever on Top Chef. Take that Mustache Joe! The chef who owns the farm did not like the ice cream. He says he is a texture freak and it was a turn off for him. Tom says that his tart was underbaked.

Tom says that the green team’s first two dishes really best highlighted the cheese. He also says there was one really bad dish that may be enough to cancel out anything positive their team did. We will not find out until judges table.

Here is how you tie up lamb, Tu.

The Judges Table

As much as I want Mustache Joe to go home, and I think the lamb chop with the sweet grits was probably the worst, he always seems to find a way to send a female chef home if at all possible. So I am dying to know what they thought.

Padma says their favorite team also had the worst dish of the day. Yep, I think they are talking about the green team.  And I was right. They let them win despite having the worst dish. Fatima and Laura’s cheese and cracker dish they thought was amazing. They were blown away by the cracker that used the cheese rind. Hopefully this gives Laura a bit more confidence. Carrie gets all the glory for her dumpling. Suck it Mustache Joe. Christopher and Tanya’s dessert dish also got great praise. However, they hated the lamb chop and Mustache Joe’s grits. Oh, Tu. Learn when to be quiet. Saying that the dish would have been better to eat with your hands is not helping you at all. Plus, Tom already had to teach you how to tie up the lamb. Shut up and let Joe go down on the sinking ship. Carrie wins for her dumpling dish.

For the blue team, Rogelio’s lamb was a big problem as was Claudette’s poorly smoked trout. I guess this love affair is over before it begins? Such a tragic love story. I have no doubt my girl Claudette will go home. Because, that’s the way of the Tom Colicchio Vagicide.

And she does. She is pissed and so am I. However, she is blaming Adrienne and that is wrong.

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Filed Under: Entertainment News, Top Chef Tagged With: Adrienne Cheatham, Brother Luck, Bruce Kalman, Carrie Baird, Christopher Scott, Claudette Zepeda-Wilkins, Entertainment News, Fatima Ali, Gail Simmons, Graham Elliot, Joe Sasto, Joseph Flamm, Laura Cole, Melissa Perfit, Padma Lakshmi, Rogelio Garcia, Tanya Holland, Tom Colicchio, Top Chef, Tu David Phu, Tyler Anderson

About tamaratattles

Come for the tea. Stay for the shade. Not for the easily offended. You're a special snowflake just like everyone else.

Comments

  1. Lynn Duncan says

    December 15, 2017 at 8:39 am

    Not a Mustache Now fan…

    Reply
  2. Cops (@copssister) says

    December 15, 2017 at 9:20 am

    Mustache Joe lost me last episode when he referred to his meat being too big to fit into Padma’s mouth. I’m predicting at least one “ride the handlebars” reference before he exits Last Chance Kitchen.

    Reply
  3. Cheryl B. (@cherylannburke1) says

    December 15, 2017 at 2:46 pm

    Yay, I finally feel like I know something that the cooks should (also due to Gordon Ramsay screaming it a few times) NEVER PUT CHEESE AND FISH TOGETHER.
    This sadly is the recap I end up watching the episode before reading completely.
    I get lost in food knowledge, lol.

    Reply
  4. Punchy says

    December 15, 2017 at 3:23 pm

    So I’m not the only one who gets a woman hating vibe from Tom?
    He always seems to find a way to kind of dismiss the women the way I see it..

    Just don’t like him at all!

    Reply
    • tamaratattles says

      December 16, 2017 at 7:30 am

      I don’t think Tom is a misogynist, per se. I just think he isn’t a fan of female CHEFS.

      Reply
    • Kate says

      December 19, 2017 at 5:59 pm

      Tom’s actually been the most outspoken celeb chef in response to the recent sexual misconduct charges. He posted an open letter on Medium that I thought was pretty well done.

      Reply
  5. Lucy Loo says

    December 15, 2017 at 3:26 pm

    Peeling mushrooms ? What the ?

    Reply
    • EnglishRose says

      December 15, 2017 at 3:31 pm

      People in England peel their mushrooms too, even the little button ones. I just give mine a quick rinse and cut the bottoms off the stems, and I understand even that’s considered too much for a lot of people – they just get a damp cloth and wipe them. I enjoyed the show a lot – it was my first time watching, thanks to the recaps here which intrigued me. Have to go back and watch the first episode, then I think I’m going to be a regular. Thanks, Tamara.

      Reply
    • Skeeter says

      December 16, 2017 at 4:12 am

      I live in the mushroom capital of the world and am surrounded by mushroom farms. Up here it is a sin to peel and wash a mushroom! Those chefs should know better!

      Reply
      • tamaratattles says

        December 16, 2017 at 7:23 am

        So you’re supposed to leave the dirt on the fungus? No wonder I don’t care for them.

        Reply
        • Skeeter says

          December 16, 2017 at 7:33 am

          You wipe the dirt off!

          Reply
    • Cindi says

      December 16, 2017 at 3:59 pm

      That’s what I said… in fairness, my hubby is a professional chef. I just started cooking a year ago (I finally decided 30 years of marriage was a long enough time to”train” him to make dinner, lol). I love cooking with mushrooms, but have never peeled them. I asked hubby and he said that there are certain dishes you would do that for, but not many. He has done it many times, but doesn’t think it’s worth it. It is solely for the color.

      Reply
  6. The Lady Cocotte says

    December 15, 2017 at 3:26 pm

    I already love this season but I get shocked every time Christopher opens his mouth. I don’t know why but I never expect that Brooklyn accent coming out of his mouth. He’s definitely one of my favorites (along with Tanya and Bruce). I’m rooting for Adrienne & Fatima too. And Tu & Brother. Damn, this is a good cast.

    Reply
  7. 8isEnough says

    December 16, 2017 at 7:30 am

    Has anyone ever recapped Last Chance Kitchen? I know we aren’t supposed to talk about it so we don’t ruin it for others but boy was it interesting last night! Would love other’s thoughts on it!

    Reply
    • tamaratattles says

      December 16, 2017 at 7:33 am

      I haven’t seen it yet. It doesn’t come on OnDemand until a day or two after. It might be up by now. I think I am the only one worried about being spoiled so if y’all want to talk about it, go ahead. 🙂 The last one I saw was a potato challenge. French Fries? Really?

      Reply
      • 8isEnough says

        December 16, 2017 at 12:57 pm

        Please offer your thoughts after. It was definitely a first!

        Reply
  8. Kipper says

    December 16, 2017 at 4:35 pm

    I watched the first week of LCK on the bravo Web site. I like it too, like seeing the previous season chefs…haven’t watched yet this week.

    Loving this season!

    Reply
  9. Kipper says

    December 16, 2017 at 4:46 pm

    Oh! The upcoming “Rocky Mountain oyster episode ? Never had them, googling recipes…having a hard time with that! No pun intended.

    Reply
  10. Shirley Rick says

    December 16, 2017 at 11:53 pm

    I’m a San Diegan and was originally rooting for Claudette, but I agree it was wrong to blame Adrienne. I’m not sure if it was just the editing of the show, but Claudette was the one who mentioned cold smoking the trout. All in all, I will check out her new restaurant when it opens in the new year.

    Reply
  11. Aud says

    December 18, 2017 at 10:07 pm

    It may be a local programming issue, but my LCK is a repeat of the one I ‘ve already seen, despite the summary appearing to be current. I didn’t like the blame game the ousted chef (leopard glasses gal), either.

    I want a big bowl of those crackers.

    Reply
    • tamaratattles says

      December 19, 2017 at 6:35 am

      The most recent one had tarantulas as an ingredient. On my On Demand there are FOUR CHOICES for episode 703. A few of them are really the potato challenge again. Try all the options. It’s a good episode.

      Reply

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