By Guest Contributor Becky J.
Well, here we are on the final night of RHOD season 2! When last we left the ladies, LeeAnne had stomped off the set because she found out that Dr. Mark Duber was going to be allowed to take the stage. The behind-the-scenes pre-show package shows LeeAnne in her dressing room asking why her man isn’t allowed to be on stage. Um, maybe because nobody attacked his career, family and accused him of getting his dick sucked at The Round Up? Just a thought. So, anyway LeeAnne grudgingly returns (she just needed some special attention and a touch up on her heaps of makeup) and they’re rolling again.
Andy welcomes Mark and asks how he feels about his portrayal this season. He says “not great.” Andy says they got a lot of questions about Mark being a control freak. They roll all the evidence of Mark’s character defects and then Cary makes a Stepford-esque speech about how Mark is a good husband. Every time Cary talks, Mark makes a weird, staring face with his eyes super wide.
She says he wants her to be “fur-filled” in her life and he understands that, for her, “fur-fillment” means splitting time between home and the office. There’s really nothing I love more than a housewife who can’t pronounce a certain word. I makes me almost pee my pants with glee every time. Like Teresa trying to say “cumin” and calling it “cummin” or NeNe saying “bride-maid” over and over instead of “bridesmaid.” It’s THE BEST, so thanks Cary.
Mark pretends that his asshole-ish behavior is just his cutting wit and sarcasm, which it plausible if not actually true. Everybody lets Mark off the hook for being a dick. Speaking of his dick, now we are finally going to talk about The Round Up! He categorically denies it and LeeAnne backs down immediately and apologizes. She denies that she meant it in an offensive way to the LGBT community and when Andy presses her about “knowing the boys who did it” she shuts down and pretends she doesn’t remember saying it. Andy says he’s headed for The Round Up and I believe him.
It goes on and on with the Mark and Cary stuff. They’re embarrassed that his older kids have to see the shenanigans from this season. His son’s frat brothers made him watch last season (you know they all drank every time Mark picked out an outfit for Cary). LeeAnne says doesn’t think about the implications of her nastiness on kids because she’s not a mom. I don’t think you have to have kids to not be a PSYCHO and realize talking that kind of shit can be harmful, but oh well. Stephanie makes a nice speech about what a great guy Mark is and how he got a bad edit.
Andy is determined to get some shit going. He asks what Mark thinks about being called a “chop shop” doctor. He seems more upset about this than the gay dick sucking allegations. That’s exactly what my PR team (in my head) would recommend. Getting too mad about The Round Up rumor would have made him look more guilty. Getting irate about somebody attacking his business makes him look conscientious and professional. Well played, playa.
Andy asks about Cary saying Rich has a small penis. Apparently, he was mad and sent nasty DMs to Cary on Twitter. She says she was just reacting to being called a homewrecker, chop shop beard. Andy turns into a therapist for a minute and says it sounds like all the problems between Cary and LeeAnne stem from them reacting to each others’ hurtful remarks. He asks if they can break this pattern. Cary says she can’t take much more. LeeAnne says she is sick of herself. I’m sick of her, too FYI.
Now we are talking about Brandi. Andy wants to address the allegation that Cary was Mark’s nanny because Brandi threw it out at the white party like it was some big revelation. Mark says they already covered this last reunion, but he does provide a very reasonable, concise explanation and timeline of his relationship with Cary. I believe him. It makes sense that he would have had her watch his kids if she worked with him and he trusted her.
Brandi just comes off looking like an insecure psycho who is desperate to get camera time and keep Stephanie all to herself. Brandi tearfully apologizes to Cary, who says she and Mark have accepted her apology, but they don’t trust her anymore. Brandi is still welcome in their home, though. Andy and D’Andra want to know if they can forgive LeeAnne the same way. The answer is no.
Brandi defends her flip-flopper behavior when it comes to LeeAnne. Stephanie says she thinks Brandi’s behavior was negatively influenced by hanging out with LeeAnne. Kameron defends LeeAnne’s threats, saying they’re just silly and of course she would never really cut somebody’s throat. Now I’m bored by this LeeAnne stuff. I like her hair, though. Andy asks if Brandi and LeeAnne can ever be friends and Brandi says no. LeeAnne makes a convoluted speech and quotes some scripture. Brandi stands firm and LeeAnne tries tears. They don’t work.
You can tell everybody is tired and they all need powder—like bad. Wrapping up, Andy does rose and thorn. Stephanie’s roses are getting back together with Brandi and her son thriving in school, her thorn is the destruction of friendships. Kameron’s rose is pink dog food. Just kidding—she says friendships and her thorn is (dildo) boundaries.
D’Andra’s rose is “pontificating” on her relationship with her mother. Stephanie stops her and asks what this means. D’Andra says it means “thinking” which is not accurate, but whatevs. Her thorn is seeing the way her relationship with her mom played out on TV. Cary’s rose is how Mark has supported her and her thorn is rumors. LeeAnne is not going to let one last chance to monopolize the show slip past. She says she’s an empty garden. Andy points out that she has a big engagement ring rose. She tearfully says she’s her own thorn. Give it a rest, lady. Nobody feels sorry for you.
Now we’re really at the end. Brandi’s thorn was hurting the Duber family and her rose is an actual rose for Stephanie a la The Bachelor. Cary sits awkwardly in the middle just like the whole Memphis trip. Andy lets D’Andra share a final thought. She pontificates about everybody not judging each other and learning to move forward after taking a few months to let the dust settle.
The end. I have to say I loved this season of Dallas and I think it’s a great franchise. I appreciate that TT lets me recap this show and I love you all for reading and commenting. I hope to see you all around this fabulous site in the future!
Great recap. I didn’t realize how dick-centric this episode was. I think Andy wanted more tea about the Round Up but LeeAnne wasn’t going there. I think the Trio of Mean Girls came across looking like three silly mean girls. LeeAnne is the train wreck that keeps on giving. Cary is a Kristin Wig Character in the making! The end.
I think your synopsis of this reunion show was great.
LeeAnne kept hunching down lower as the second hour continued… thought Andy might have had to turn over a couch cushion to find her?!.
Think most except for Kameron and D’Andra.. need serious medical intervention. IMHO
I liked last season, this season was great! I know I’d love to see LeeAnne go but honestly if she wasn’t constantly going after everybody what is left of the show??? You are a great recapper and I really appreciate TT giving us Dallas lovers somewhere to chat. Is there a found footage or some crap name like that coming? And I’d love someone who is good with technology to take the season, heck I’ll take a few episodes, take out anything to do with LeeAnne and see if there was anything else interesting…I’m curious. Me I wanna move into some rich guy or girls house to be a Dallas HW next year just to be up close and personal and pull her own underhanded crap on her just to have fun…yes I think it would be fun to pull LeeAnne’s crap she pulls on everybody else on her and since I don’t give a crap what anyone thinks of me I think I’d have a blast! Plus heck a decent paycheck add on, I just want 1 season, would be nice.
Loved this show. Great recap! Thank you! Prediction a returning cast of everyone but Kamerone. People need to go back to regularly spelled names, I’m talking to you Camerone
great recap, now go make yourself a “sangwich”
Haven’t watched the reunion yet but Becky J’s use of the words pontificating and pontificates had me laughing out loud!
Hopeful for a season 3. If there’ is a season 3 hopefully Brandi will bathe and wash her stringy hair. Why does Brandi always look dirty? She and Stepahnie always look cheaply dressed and about 10 years late on their fashion choices. Kameron grew on me as the season progressesd. If the show returns I hope they keep the cast as is.
Funny you should mention that. They are casting for season three. I am not yet sure who is on the bubble.
Brandi is my favorite. I just don’t really appreciate her humor. The dildo was better than the poop of season one.
So glad there is a season 3. This season put rhoc to shame!
Leave it to TT to put the biggest bomb in a comment to a comment! Thats why I read everything 😀
Good to know there will be season 3 🙂
This made my night! I cannot wait for season 3. Dallas is the hidden jewel of the franchise. I liked Brandi in season 1 but as this season progressed she annoyed me by flipping sides when it benefited her. I will say Cary is a good one to forgive Brandi for bringing up being the “nanny” It will be interesting to see who they keep and who they replace. PS I’m a little star struck you replied to my comment ☺
LOL. Sweetie, I’m just an cranky old lady sitting on a broken couch drinking way too much wine every night with an attitude. Believe me, I’m nothing special.
Thanks for commenting here. I really appreciate it.
I’m so pumped about a season 3! I actually love this franchise. Some of them are actual friends, which is more fun to watch than what the other franchises have devolved into.
I think part of the reason she looks dirty is her use of self-tanners. She is a red-head and needs to own up to pale skin – she would look younger and better
Becky J, thanks so much for all your recaps all season. I’ve really enjoyed season two and will be thrilled about a season three.
The reunion was just enough, and right now they seem to be acting newbie enough to keep it watchable. (That’s as of now, lol).
Loved this season! Your recaps were spot on Becky! I hope they keep the same cast I guess. Really do not care for Carey at all. I think she is such a trouble maker and phony. But that is just me.
I was surprised at how well the season went and how fast it went. I still like LeAnne although she is whacky. LOVED the addition of D’Andra. Thought she was awesome. Kam grew on me. Brandi and Stephanie can stay or go. Meh. LOL
You did a great job!
D’Andra playing the matriarch was so blah. I find her ice-cold and stoic to a fault, they should have cast her brilliant mother as the Housewife instead.
As for the “empty garden” speech, I think that entire tearful monologue gave me a case of LeeAnne’s fake PTSD. Are these reunions supposed to feel like an endurance test for viewers?
I hope the cast next year is Brandi, Stephanie, Cary, I suppose D’Andra, and a couple of fun additions. This show needs some lightness and froth next season – someone with a personality like Margaret from RHoNJ would be much appreciated on this show. Stephanie was right when she said they were going too deep and too personal to bring each other down, and the only way to lift it and make it fun to watch will be to axe the dark destroyer (of glassware) LeeAnne.
I realize that I ignore Leeanne a lot. Her acting to get out of all situations is really just a tactic and old.
I noticed every time Andy was getting ready to tell her something screwed up she said or did, she always is shaking her head “yes” before he finishes, as if she knows what he is going to say and he’s right. Kind of a weird and annoying thing agreeing before hearing what he was going to say.
I am surprised Rich has stuck with her, and she has certainly an interesting social life for so many people all they are able to do is complain about her.
I bet she’s just acting maybe and we see that side.
Something keeps women like D’Andra around for 20years. And defends her as well.
Great recap Becky J. One important part that you left out. Brandi twisted in her little head that Cary was the effin nanny because Mark’s daughter told Brandi that Cary babysat her. Brandi assumed that Cary was the nanny, because all babysitters are nannies. The only one I hope doesn’t come back is Kameron. You can’t be that pretentious and be boring at the same time.
Great recap. Loved this season. I want to see them all back, except maybe Kameron. And some new blood, too.
Cary’s struggle is real. She’s married to a dude who likes to restyle female physiques during the day and by night she has to play Barbie dress up doll in whatever he pulls from her/his well-stocked closet. How many times do we have to hear reality tv celebs blame their televised faults on editing? It wasn’t editing that made viewers realize (again and again) that he’s jealous about the required attention his four year old daughter gets from her mother. Nothing shouts insecure, selfish, controlling loser louder than a man who pouts about the needs of a 4 year-old. Nothing Cary says in his defense changes the fact that he’s a bonehead jerk. His adult kids can handle innuendo and rumors. Not worried about them. The four year-old, on the other hand, does not have to watch the show to learn anything about him. She picks up on who he really is every time she’s within a foot of her mom and he rolls his eyes.
Best recap I’ve read about this show! Agree with everything said, and will look forward to more recaps from Becky!
I live in Dallas and I know how “Dallas” works. If you google D’Andra Simmons, her family’s wealth is no joke. Honestly, she is the wealthiest of any housewife of any franchise. If anyone tries to say the Highland Park zip code doesn’t matter-they are lying. It is EVERYTHING in this city. People brag about it, name drop the street name they live on as even the street name is a sign of the amount of wealth you have. It is ridiculous!!! Unless you live here, you have NO idea how hilarious it all is. Kameron has married into wealth, thus she is accepted. Anything outside of HP, super snooty people look down their nose. The joke LeeAnne made about Plano is real-honestly people say things like that. It is unbelievable how pretentious it can be. Considering her upbringing, D’Andra is quite “normal” and has a great repoutation here.
Yes, I completely agree about D’Andra and Kameron.BUT Can you please explain why Dallas society accepts LeeAnne and her behavior? Or is this just an act for RHOD?
I’ve heard from friends involved in the charity world that LeeAnne truly does walk the walk with her charities, it is kinda a power thing plus it diesn’t Hurt that D’Andra is your best friend. I have no idea though how she makes a living. She has her speaking engagements and this show. D’Andra is powerful and has connections-i’m sure she is compensated somehow. I have also heard she is very intimidating and you do not cross her. Kinda like that bully in school. If she crossed D’Andra(which she would never do)she would need to move out of Dallas. LeeAnne keeps her ear to the ground as to have scoop on everyone. Information is power. Why in the world would Cary go on this show knowing LeeAnne can and will do things like this? Is it worth it? The embarrassment to her family and business?? I know they say first time shame on them second time shame on me. She should have NEVER done a 2nd season knowing LeeAnne would drag their family through the mud. If someone even implied 1/4 of what she did towards my husband, things would have gone down a lot differently. I guess fame is more important.
LeeAnne really needs to go. I think she’s just crossed too many lines in the sand and is a bit schizo.
Kameron also needs to go. She brought nothing but weird mouth tics and condescending attitude.
Bring back Brandi, Stephanie, Carey, D’Andre and I’d love to see them add Kelli Rasberry.
Agree on all fronts. Leeane has crossed the line from nonthreatening psycho to dangerous psycho. I wouldn’t film with her either.
Omg, Kelly Rasberry! Yes! She probably wouldn’t do it though. Might be too controversial for her radio persona if she has any backlash from the drama that WILL occur on Season 3.
Btw, I moved to Colorado 6 years ago. Was born and raised in Dallas. Listened to KKITM since elementary school. I miss it so much. I just happened to be visiting Dallas and was watching the news at my friend’s house when the news came that Kidd Kraddick passed away. I was devastated. 🙁
Dangerous psycho, or dangerous actor. Both describe LeeAnne to me.