I hear that tonight’s Below Deck is jam packed so I better go ahead and get right into it! We start back with dirty feet gate. I am amazed at how quickly I’ve move from Team Nico to Team EJ. Apparently, dickish behavior is genetic.
Did Jen shrink Captain Lee’s t-shirts? IJS
EJ goes to tell Captain Lee that he has to go back to his regular boat after this charter. Baker tells EJ as they are working on the deck, that she dreamed about cleaning her feet the night before. She clearly thinks a lot about her job. When I worked as a Lab Coordinator for college tutors I didn’t have anyone who could do Calculus, so I had to do it. Let’s just say it was not my best college course, so I went and sat in on classes and met with the professor to learn how to tutor it. It required all the brain power I could muster. I used to dream Calculus problems at that time. I’ve always wanted to dream in French, as I’ve been told that is when you master the language. Sadly that is a goal I am still working on. Maybe one day.
This next group of guests, is no group of hillbillies with new money. They are used to living the high life. One of them is a restaurant owner. Matt has his work come out for him.
Kate is still riding Jen to stop her constant slacking. Bruno needs to be working on the interior. He seems to be doing most of that anyway.
The weather is horrible. Captain Lee says they can’t leave the dock any time soon. Meanwhile Nico has injured himself on the tender and says he needs to go to the hospital and can’t get it back to the boat. Bruno jumps in to save him and the boat. Because, hero. I line caught Nico in the elbow and he can’t move his arm from the elbow down. Nico returns from medical with a pinched and inflamed nerve and an arm in a sling.
The guests are not happy that the boat is not leaving the dock for at least a day. The gay guest is just like the rest of us and in love with Bruno. Bruno tells Kate he will help in any way. Kate shit talks him about wanting to be a stewardess. Really Kate? Didn’t you just say that being docked means the interior does all the work and the exterior gets to relax? He’s offering to help. You really could be more gracious.
The guests love Matt’s Mahi salad. In another life, I have enjoyed many a blackened Mahi (or Grouper) salad. I need to see one of those out very soon. How did those things get eliminated from my life?
Apparently, this group brought their own tacky costumes for parties. So much for not being tacky new money. The food continues to impress. Except for one guest who thinks two fish dishes in a row is not acceptable.
Nico makes a tacky sexual reference about Brianna being a big help checking on him because after all he can’t use his right arm. Disgusting.
Captain Lee wants to drive home the point that the seas are too high to travel, so he takes two of the guys out to scare the shit out of them. I love Captain Lee. These guests are never going to leave the dock. The crew is scrambling to keep them happy so they still get a tip. Kate takes the guest on a land excursion. Matt is trying to plan a luau for the evening festivities at a beach. Kate takes them on a really great excursion where they wear scuba masks on their heads and walk around a shipwreck.
It’s like entertaining toddlers. From one distracting event to the next. EJ tells Baker that he is out after this service but not to tell anyone. Brianna and Jen argue like crazy when they are left to clean the interior alone. Bruno is a huge help to Matt in the galley.
Kate returns and is totally pissed off at the condition of the interior. Bruno is also pissed off at the condition of the interior. He wants to take matters into his own hands. Nico always wants to take matters into her own hands. He wants to take Brianna to a hotel for the day. How is that possible? The two stews manage to completely bungle the dinner service, so once again Bruno is the hero! He jumps in to help with service. When Kate asks Bruno what he thinks of the Luau, he rightly points out that nothing was set up outside. She sends him to go tell Captain Lee what he would have done differently, because he wants to know. What a bitch. I am back to hating Kate again. What Bruno doesn’t know is that Captain Lee will never hear a bad word about Kate ever. She can literally do no wrong. She is marching him into the lion’s den and this will not end well for him.
I mean for the love of God, she’s already forced him to dress up as a Pineapple King or some such nonsense beneath the dignity of his post. There is literally nothing he will not do for her. Including introducing himself as Don Ho’s brother “Ass” and telling them that by the power invested in him by the great Hawaiian Kind Come On I Wanna Lay Ya, he officially declares this Jason Swing Day. I can hear his twitter being attacked as I type.
Bruno says he has a lot to learn from Kate. I’m not thinking that Kate’s particular head stew style will get Bruno very far. Kate dumps all the clean up on Jen and Brianna. Which seems fair considering they did nothing but the bare minimum for most of the day.
Next week: Out with the old guest who sadly went nowhere, drama with the crew especially when Captain Lee realizes that Bruno is doing so much of Matt’s work and giving him ideas, and in with the new crew. CAPTAIN LEE’S WIFE COMES ON THE SHOW! She is an amazing human being, and Kate argues with Jen more.