I’m not even sure how to explain this one. But here is my best effort. New York Magazine (the print version) did a story about some local Manhattanites where they go back to their first NYC apartments. It was one of those things where celebrities want to go back and visit their roots. Sometimes on a reality show reality show we see famous people returning to their childhood home. I remember seeing Oprah visiting Rihanna in Barbados and Rihanna took Oprah to her childhood home. It’s a common “look how far I’ve come” sort of thing.
So one day, Tom D’Agostino is lounging around his Manhattan penthouse in his boxer briefs wondering if he should go cruising for chicks at The Regency, or if he wanted to go off to The Hamptons and prowl around there, when suddenly his doorman announces that Martha Stewart was in the lobby and wanted to see his apartment. She didn’t call, she didn’t make an appointment. She just showed up. So Tom jumped up and hid all the porn and empty bottles of SkinnyGirl and Ramona Pinot Grigio and used condoms. Then he put on pants and a clean shirt, washed his face and hands and let her in.
Martha claimed that Tom’s penthouse was her first NYC apartment. Oh, bullshit. I don’t believe her already. I bet she saw Tom’s modest but still lovely penthouse on the Real Housewives of New York City which she doesn’t admit to watching and decided that would be her story.
Despite the fact that Martha was being Martha while surveying his apartment to see if it would be a satisfactory ruse, our favorite media whore agree to the photo shoot. At the photo shoot, Martha changed her story to say it really wasn’t her first apartment, she just spent a few months there one summer. How old is this apartment building?
So anyway, the stunt was that Martha would arrive with a pie, which she left as a gift for Tom. Since then she has had a hissy fit because he has not returned the pie dish. Tom says it was just a generic Pyrex pie dish and she insists it was her most favorite pie pan ever. I am not kidding She is causing a stink over the pie pan according to Page Six. I’m appalled that she is waving a fork around while eating pie.
Also, in the print version of the magazine, she said about Tom’s home, ” “It was very beautiful and light-filled and airy and all white, the way it was meant to be (when she fake lived there). Now it’s much more enclosed and dark and it’s more masculine now. I mean, he’s a bachelor now, isn’t he?” #Shade
Martha has always had some sort of jealousy toward our Countess. In 2015 at a dinner honoring the Qatari ambassador where both Martha and the Countess were invited guests, Martha was allegedly incensed that the ambassador was flirting with the Countess. He invited her to visit Qatar and talked about RHONY saying he would love to be on that show. Martha loudly whispered that he didn’t want to be on that show, our Countess pointed out that she could hear Martha and asked if she would like her to share her tawdy past (you know the whole felon in federal prison making ponchos thing) with the ambassador and she shut her mouth. The ambassador told Luann again he would love to be on the show and Luann laughed in Martha’s general direction.
I was going to recap Luann on Wendy Williams this week. I put it on the back burner because there was nothing much to report. Wendy asked about her relationship and she said what we all already know. The only thing to report is she seems happy. She talked about her work with the Red Cross in the Florida Keys and gave some information on how to donate. I believe that was her reason for doing the show.
Don’t come for the Countess. She will always rise above.
Martha Stewart is currently doing a very high brow cooking show with Snoop Dog.