It’s that time again, boys and squirrels, after a long day of Sunday School and Worship services and trying to run over the stupid Methodists to get to the Red Lobster before there is a line, we finally are all nestled on the couch in the living room, laying on pillows on the floor, or in our Lazy E Boy chair ready for The Disney Sunday Night Movie! It’s almost time for Tinkerbell!
Oh wait. That was back when dinosaurs ruled the earth and Sunday shows were all family oriented. Instead, we have Shahs of Sunset where “friends” will scream at each other for an hour while bossing around the waitstaff. Um, yay?
At least we are going to NYC for a few episodes so the horrific fighting and alcohol poisoning will have a new backdrop. The misogynistic theme song has begun, so I’ll unzip this, you do the rest. Before we get to NYC we have to hear more of MJ saying the most vile things to Tommy in the drunken argument that is never going to end unless MJ somehow passes out. The next morning at 8:30 a.m. the camera crew is allegedly in their bedroom and MJ and Tommy and the stupid chihuahuas are a big pile of stink in the same bed. Tommy, every the peacemaker attempts make up with her, and by make up I mean have sex, and MJ isn’t having it. I’m secretly wishing that Josh, the winner of BB19, would suddenly bust into the room with pots and pans and circus music. Also why is there a candle burning? Passing out drunk with candles is no bueno. They are both in clothes. This whole scene was ridiculous enough before, MJ rolls over and tells Tommy that last night he was coming at her really hard. MJ is delusional. Completely out of touch with reality. In the light of day, they agree to be healthy. 
But wait. Remember the walls that they just painted? MJ jumps out of bed and picks up the giant box of colored chalk she just happens to have handy for this scene and starts making a giant list of steps they need to take right on the freshly painted wall. I am not joking when I say that much like Kim Richards, MJ cannot even spell sobriety. /heavy sigh. The fact that they have to write down the need to stop drinking and smoking and get their shit together on any surface is a problem. MJ’s #1 on the list was parenting class. If this means another scenes with a fake crying baby I am not sure I can go on.
Mike goes to the divorce lawyer to sign the final papers for his divorce from Jessica. So much has happened since we started watching this show, two marriages, a divorce, a baby, it feels like we have spent a lifetime with these people. It seems like Jessica didn’t ask for anything. Mike really doesn’t have anything anyway. Both waive alimony. It’s pretty simple. Mike took it really hard because he knows he fucked up.
Off to NYC! The shahs have rented a super nice townhouse with a house concierge named Georgia. I’m in love with the townhouse. How soon can me an Banjo move in? Not as soon as the Patron starts to flow and the Asa bashing begins unfortunately. Reza starts it off by saying that Mike told him the rabbi they are going to go see tomorrow should redo their wedding so at least it will be done by an honest person. Did Asa walk off the show? We didn’t get her last week and she isn’t on the NYC trip. Is she yet another person who just doesn’t want to be around a bunch of terrible people? Why must they trash her even when she is not around? Golnesa and Adam stick up for Asa at least.
Shalom is not thrilled that Golnesa kisses another guy in the play. Golnesa apparently met Shalom on J-Date because she was looing for a Jew? I’m not sure I believe that. I am also not sure I believe that Shalom is leaving the townhouse and going home because he just found out Golnesa kisses someone in the play. This is all so staged. Or not. He is doing the whole hiding from the cameras things and tripping out hard. Mike tries to give GG relationship advice. He tells her she needs to ask herself, “Is my ego my amigo?” Shalom flips off all the cameras and dips. Mike goes and drags Shalom back in. Mike tells GG she needs to not do the play. She says Shalom has money he will take care of her. So, um, why is he asking for alimony from GG? I really can’t believe she took this hothead back. My theory is he is only back for the time that the show airs. This prick is being a horrible person on the very weekend he gets engaged to her And she said yes!
MJ and Reza counsel GG on her relationship. They suggest that she just lie to Shalom. Shalom apparently had no idea his family was disowning him for being with a non-Jew. Um, weren’t they fine with it on Dash Dolls? Do they even live in this country? Golnesa tries and fails to play the submissive girlfriend role with him and things get escalated because he won’t speak. The other fools just sit on the stairs listening to the fight eating Chinese food. Then Shalom leaves again. While everyone else gossips, Adam is the only one who goes to comfort GG. Adam is way too good for this show. Before GG goes to sleep, Shalom texts her to meet him to talk.
Then next morning, Reza goes around making some fucking noise he calls the Persian alarm clock. To wake him up. I’d introduce him to clocks by clocking him right upside his fat fucking face. Shalom is back in Golnesa’s bed. So how exactly did Shalom get the proposal on the marquee in Times Square in the hour between telling her to fuck off and he’s leaving and her meeting him in Times Square? And procure a gorgeous diamond. That fight was fake as fuck. The proposal was off camera. Maybe that is what Shalom wanted. To keep the cameras away.
Reza and Adam go to meet with a gay rabbi. He has actually done the surrogacy thing with his partner. He tells such a great story about how to talk to their kid about having to dads and other things. It was very moving and Reza and Adam both cry.
The next day everyone goes to one of my favorite parts of NYC. The diamond/gold district. I didn’t have a lot of money when I went there but I managed to buy three or four thin little gold bangles that I never take off. I later bought a giant very expensive one that I also never take off and those smaller ones have held up well banging against it all these years. I keep thinking it is time for a new one. MJ bought a Cartier watch from the market. She also buys Tommy a watch. Now I really want to go and look at the Cartier gold watches. I’d just need my Miami guy to fly up and let me know I was buying the real thing and negotiate the price. I’ve always been a really hard negotiator having grown up in the souks where prices fluctuation and you never pay the first price. Some of the few bits of Arabic I still remember well are “How much is this?” and “No thank you” as I walked away.
Later at dinner, Reza says when they get back they will have a winter party. The gang pushes Mike to try to get back together with Jessica. Why?
Next Week: Mike goes to see Jessica who apparently lives in NYC now and they supposedly hooked up. am not sure if I believe that or not. This was filmed last December and I think they were well past over at that point. He probably just took some HO to the HOtel. NTTAWWT.
A lot of “fakery” in this episode! ?
Complete bull. This show has gone off the deep end.
This show makes me ill. I only read your recaps, not because I care about the show but because I enjoy your posts. This show needs to go away.
If this was filmed in December, then Asa probably could not fly at that point. Wasn’t her baby born at the first of the year?
I normally think that MJ’ s mom is evil incarnate, but she is spot on when she says that MJ should not breed. When you are in your mid-forties like she is, you should have your sh!t together and the fact that you are making a life goals list on your wall with crayons and that your partner is cool with that sort of proves Mama Joon’s point!
Seeing Reza and Adam together is always great. Adam seems to have a good heart and brings peace to the chaos that is Reza. Seeing them with the Rabbi was nice. To have an Orthodox Rabbi tell a bit of his story was very heartwarming. I hope that they do decide to have a baby.
Mike still loves Jessica. Crazy as it seems, I still root for them. I think that if they ever did in a far off universe reconcile, that he would be a great husband this time. Most of the time I would not say that. Most of the time, I say that if you cheat…then you need to die, because that is not something that I could get over, but Mike seems truly broken and remorseful.
Joking that GG found Shalom on J-Date is hysterical. I do hope that their marriage works out and is not just a stunt for the show, but I guess time will tell. As she said on WWHL last night, his family is not crazy about her. I can’t blame them. If one of my son’s married someone after a few months and I saw all of her scary crazy laid out on tv, then I would be scared for my son too. Then again…it may just all be part of their storyline.
It seems like so many people deathly fear comittment these days of the easy hook up, and fight it kicking and screaming like a child. This whole bunch sure does, except Asa and Adam. Im not so sure Mike would change even if he could get Jessica back, because deep down he is so fearful of comittment and being with just one woman forever. I feel bad for him too, but he had Jessica jump thru all these hoops, and still he sabatogged it in the end for nothing but wanton pleasure. I think he would just do it again, once he got over the relief of getting another chance and the boredom set in again. I think she knows that. I actually see Mike with more of a career independent type down the line, and Jessica with someone who can take care of her. You can see Reza is finally getting it, and seeing the benefit of a stable relationship and the comfort and security of that, outweighs the fun of a random hook up. Hes making a family of his own. Reza is actually an emotional sensitive guy underneath it all, and Adam is just fabulous. Ive allways liked Adam. My husband actually thinks Reza is the most normal one of this bunch. I love Tommy for MJ, but Im not sure I love MJ for Tommy. Time will tell, but he seems too good for her, so I hope she evolves into something better like Reza.
It’s such a shame Gigi is just going to have to go through it and learn the hard way in dealing with these immature double standard men. I hate that for her. I can tell she really tried to keep her composure but he just refused to meet her halfway and just insisted on being a dick to her. And the whole dysfunctional supposed wedding proposal right after a drunken tequila ridiculous fight just goes to show how this relationship is going to play out. They’re getting back together after the separation divorce??? Yeah, she’s just going to have to go through it the hard way.
Yeah, I’d have clocked Reza right in the face too with that obnoxious Persian alarm clock! So annoying!
No wonder MJ is dating a non Persian. Seems like every man on this show has the impression the rules don’t apply to themselves and double standard bullshit should be totally accepted by their girlfriends, fiance’s, or wives. I’m sure there are Persian men out there who don’t do this kind of thing, but all I’m saying is it’s not displayed on this show in any way shape or form. And of course, there are these types of men in every race and religion…not just Persians. I just have no tolerance for it because bottom line is it comes from being spoiled, immature, and having troublesome insecurity. Wish she would just tell them to hit the road and save herself decades of hurt and disappointment.
After waking up to the tragedy of my city, and the endless news, I am going to watch this stupid show and be happy to be able to. Thanks for the recap TT.
Hi Cheryl: I cannot even imagine what you are all going through. I am afraid to turn on the news each and every day. I live in Mass. so I know a bit about the horror of this being so close to where you live. But as Americans as humans it is too close for all of us.
I will be praying for the families of all of those who are hurting (yes, even the shooter). Mental illness is a scary unpredictable factor that we don’t know enough about and seem to have little care to find out about.
Big hugs to you all. Peace and strength.
Thank you. When I wake up I switch my remote from ID channel to local news. All I saw was a square with a tweet from the President. My first thought was “oh my god, not again”. Having no idea what had happened just something, somewhere. The realized it was here!!
Accounted for kids, and it’s absolutely heartbreaking. So much news overload without info due to it being so massive and soon after, crazy how thankful Bravo became, lol. Thanks so much for your thoughts. Have a good day. Hugs, peace and strength back at you. ?
This show has become so boring to me I can’t make it past the 1st commercial without falling asleep. One time I woke up 3 times and started it over trying to watch it. Needless to say, I never saw the show. Thanks TT for enduring this punishment and recapping so eloquently the episodes. It’s the only way I know what’s going on with this show.
I was impressed with GG’s calmness this episode.
Still think her husband is hideous though, now even more so after his behavior.
Thank you, TT, for the old Sunday memories!!!
Recap fascinating to read, esp the Disney prologue. Change that to “Catholic” and you summed up a lot of childhoods in my area.
See, I like the grit of the Orthodox Rabbi explaining how to tell a child about surrogacy. That was moving.
The handy chalk for the wall when Tommy and MJ were in bed made me crazy. Writing on a wall makes no sense. Those dogs always look like “what is it with these cameras and people?” Tommy, we love you red PJs and all. MJ, stick with non-Persians. They think you are cute, not annoying.
No way did the engagement in Times Square “just” occur. What was fake? The fight? The engagement? But I loved everyone listening in and running away. That was pure Reza.
The Gold and Diamond district was fun to see. Why doesn’t MJ wear the first Cartier Panther watch she got at age 16? Why does she need 3? If I went there. what would I want? LOVED MJ pulling a CC from her bra strap. If I did that, they would be asking for another form of ID. Wondering if they insist on 18K gold, like the Asians do.
For some of us, “Shahs” is still fun.
waking up this morning to the terror in Las Vegas is heart wrenching. I got nothing but prayers.
Someone emailed me that Jessica said on her IG that she was not in NYC when the Shahs were there and Mike was claiming to have slept with her at the Holiday Inn.