I just noticed that there were many more comments on episode one than the last two. Comments don’t provide a good indication of the number of views but now I am going to go look at the page views to see if y’all are getting bored with this season. I am liking it so far. Hell, I am even liking Kate this season. If you aren’t watching you are missing a good season
When the episode begins the crew is still having one hell of a night out in a local club. Brianna shows us she is not stranger to a stripper pool and Jen is hiding in a bathroom stall because she is shitfaced. Baker is dancing on tables. Nico tells Kate that the crew is wasted and they need to herd them all back on the boat. Kate says she will meet up with them back on the boat. She didn’t just pay for all of Hot Jesus’ drinks not to get her money’s worth. Back at the boat, Brianna is the only semi sober one. She has to tell Chris Brown she is not into him, but she said it in the nicest way. He will not remember it in the morning though, so I imagine she will have to say it again.
Kate’s walk of shame was a little too late this time and Captain Lee realizes that she is not on the boat. Jen says in her talking head that Kate went to church. Nico catches Kate doing the walk of shame. Captain Lee doesn’t seem to have a problem with it. When Captain Lee hears that Kate was at church she says he was indeed and “Jesus came and I saw God twice.”
Chris Brown still sucks.
It’s been exactly three months since Nico’s brother died. I don’t understand keeping the time like that. I could not tell you the dates my parents died. I can remember next to nothing about the services. I black the whole thing out. It’s literally permanently erased from my memory. I’m glad for that. I do remember doing “calendar math” with my elementary kids one year when I suddenly realized it was my mother’s birthday and I had to leave the room. A co-worker found me sobbing in the hallway and took my class until I could wash my face and get myself together.
Jen convinces Kate to let her iron in a bikini on deck instead of the hole. That’s the smartest thing a new stew has ever asked for. Nico suddenly bolts off the deck and calls his girlfriend sobbing. He is really worried about leaving his mother. He feels really guilty being in paradise.
There are eight women on the next charter. They want a disco party and to just have a lot of fun. And by fun they mean drinks. But first, there is still a lot of work to be done. Bruno is still having a lot of trouble learning the knots.
Brianna asks Nico if he needs to talk. He says he does. She grabs her ukulele and takes him to the deck. After he vents a bit, Bri plays the ukulele for him. Just what the doctor ordered.
After all kinds of last minute cleaning, it is time for the charter guests to arrive. Jen and Kate think that all of the guests look like Vicki from the housewives. Because they do. And they are there to WHOOP. IT. Up. They actually woo hoo!
As the boat leaves the dock, someone failed to untie a line and the boat crashed back into the deck. Oh, someone is getting a ticket home. And they may have to swim to the airport. Captain Lee says he is madder than a pissed on chicken. It was Chris and Baker who stood there watching the person on the deck not releasing the spring line and they said nothing. Thank God it was not Bruno. Also, in fairness I am not sure they really know enough to tell the guy on the shore how to do his job.
Nico is dealing with a lot, and when Chris Brown says that he had nothing to do with the boat getting damaged, he’s just furious. Chris Brown has got to go.
Jen still doesn’t know her place. Kate has to go to shore to find a disco ball. This leaves Jen to take care of the guests while Bri is on break. Jen can’t even open a bottle of beer. I can open a beer on the inside of a car door. I’m just saying. #IGotSkills
At least Chef Matt is making the guests happy.
Chris Brown is completely useless. He seems to think he is a charter guest. Nico goes to Captain Lee and talks to him about the problems with the deckhands. He says Chris Brown doesn’t do a damn thing. Captain Lee decides to put Chris on anchor watch. I initially thought this was a terrible idea until Captain Lee points out they don’t need an anchor watch. In that case it is perfect because Chris Brown won’t we watching a damn thing.
In similar fashion, Kate makes Jen wear an afro wig and funky sunglasses at dinner service. The guests really get into the disco party. Bri is having a great time with the guests.
For reasons unknown, Kate is bitching at Bruno for refusing to participate in the congo line.
With another successful cruise completed it’s time to dock and there are already issues. Things go all to shit. Chef Matt comes out to take over a line and manages to save the day. Nico is embarrassed, again.
The guests were thrilled and leave a very fat tip. Captain Lee is livid and is going to go off on them. Captain Lee said the docking situations were atrocious. He says that there will be a change in the configuration of the deck team. Everyone got $1,540 each for a two-day cruise. I’d scrub toilets for that. Nico gives everyone yet another lesson on docking the boat. Bruno is nervous he might be sent home. He should be because Captain Lee listens to Kate and he pissed Kate off.
The crew hits the town to party their asses off because some of them may not be on the next cruise. Jen who never gets wasted is wasted again. Chef Matt asks Brianna on a date. She said yes! Then on the bus on the way back she whines to Nico that he would not dance with her. He promises her he will next time. Oh Nico. Have you forgotten your girlfriend?
Jen is drunk as a skunk and waking up everyone on the dock. Brianna tries hitting on Nico again once they are back on board and gets no where
Next week: Matt takes a very undeserving Brianna on a date. Nico Skypes with his girlfriend, a “gourmet chef” and his friends are the guests and they are not impressed with Chef Matt. It looks like Chris Brown is still on the crew.