Tamara Tattles

Come for the tea. Stay for the shade.

  • COMMENTING RULES!
  • Blinds
  • RHOA
  • RHOBH
  • RHOD
  • RHONY
  • RHONJ
  • RHOOC
  • RHOP
  • RHOSLC
  • Shahs of Sunset
  • Pump Rules
  • Southern Charm
  • Below Deck
  • MDLLA
  • WWHL
  • Killing Eve
  • Open Forum
  • MAFS
  • 90 Day
  • Love After Lockup
  • FT
You are here: Home / Entertainment News / Jax & Britanny Take Kentucky: The Gospel According To Jax

Jax & Britanny Take Kentucky: The Gospel According To Jax

September 14, 2017 by tamaratattles 23 Comments

Sorry to disappoint you, gentle readers, but you are stuck with my recap of Jax & Britanny as The Fabulous Lady C, is unavailable for this recap. In fact, I’ll probably be doing the rest of them. She isn’t really filming the season.

I on the other hand, love this show. I did just realize I really haven’t really eaten today and need to scrounge something up before Big Brother tonight. I’m rather grouchy today. Jax is sweating like a whore in church. That’s because he is a whore getting ready to go to a Pentecostal church with Britanny and her mother. This is going to blow Jax mind. And probably blow some of your minds too. It is quite the experience. I have a lot of family on my mamas side that go to churches just like this. It is interesting that Britanny is putting on makeup. I can’t wait to see if her mother wears any. This religious group does not believe in women wearing makeup or jewelry. At least that is what Church of God of Prophecy believes. Tan Mom is wearing a ton of makeup. A shit ton of makeup.

The church isn’t very full. It seems as though the interracial couple did not sign the release which only served to draw more attention to them by blurring out their faces. Jax survived the service and the talking in tongues and the dreaded turning to your neighbors and greeting them. Then he and Britanny hightailed it right out of there.  Jax tells Mamaw that the Pentecostal church just isn’t his thing. She says it doesn’t matter to her what type of church they go to, as long as the go.

The next thing on Jax’s list of southern activities to look silly doing is hunting. They have decked him out in head to toe camouflage.

While the boys were away, the ladies went out to lunch. I have never had beer cheese before or even heard of it, but it is apparently all the rage in Kentucky. I love beer, and I love cheese, so I definitely need to check that out. It is there that we are reminded that Jax is on probation from the sunglasses he shoplifted in Hawaii. So he can’t shoot guns. That happened two years ago so it seems like an awfully long time. Was he convicted of a felony? He didn’t have to do any jail time. Britanny is upset that Jax is telling everyone that she is depressed.

So Jax has to tell Britanny’s dad that he actually can’t shoot firearms. In fact, when Thomas Ravenel went on the hunting trip on Southern Charm, he couldn’t be around the guns at all. Jax may be walking a fine line here. He did come clean to Britanny’s dad about the theft charge though. They claim they are hunting coyotes. I have never heard of this.  They claimed they didn’t see any because of all of Jax talking. However, there were some convenient targets set up for them to shoot at.

Britanny takes Jax a couple of her friends to the local bar where they order a fishbowl. In South Carolina where I used to drink these, they were called mind erasers. It’s a giant container, in this case, and actual fishbowl, that comes with a straw for everyone and you drink the entire thing together until it is all gone. That is, you don’t stop sucking until the entire gigantic drink is gone. It is a terrible idea and Jax is way too old for this. Oh they are just going to sip it. That kind of defeats the entire purpose and puts everyone’s spit in the drink. Jax is talking about the church service quite negatively in front of Britanny’s sister and her friends. Britanny is trying to reel him in and help him out but he just keeps going.

I am tired of the whole “Britanny is losing her spark” storyline. Why the hell is he telling everyone on earth that Britanny is depressed, but not talking to her about it?

Then Britanny’s ex-boyfriend, who she was living with when she met Jax, walks into the bar. Now I see why Tan Mom and Mamaw are so ready to marry Britanny off. The ex, Aaron, is black. I can guarantee you Mamaw was not happy about that. Jax is freaking out. He has no playbook for how to act when an ex boyfriend shows up and starts talking to your girlfriend. So he goes to the bar to get another shot while Aaron and Britanny catch up on old times.

Jax decides to just buy shots for the three of them. He doesn’t need anymore shots. He seems intimidated by Aaron who is a super chill guy. Jax asks Britanny more than once if she if okay if he buys them all a shot. She’s fine. Aaron is fine. Jax is freaking out. In her confessional, Britanny reminds of that in LA all they do is hang out with Jax’s exes.

Later, Jax and Britanny talk privately and Jax asks her if she is sure she is not unhappy because she’s not with Aaron anymore. Britanny says she wouldn’t trade Jax for the world. But while we are on the subject of Britanny’s happiness, she asks him why he keeps telling everyone she has lost her spark, or spunk, as she puts it. Britanny says she is happy being with him in LA. And because Jax is drunk, he doesn’t drop it but instead, tells her he doesn’t think she is happy.

Next week, Jax’s stupid human tricks include, muddin’ on ATVs, telling Mamaw that Britanny has gained a lot of weight and making Britanny cry. And Daddy ain’t having that.

Share this:

  • Tweet

Related

Filed Under: Entertainment News, Vanderpump Rules Tagged With: Brittany Cartwright, Entertainment News, Jax & Britanny Take Kentucky, Jax Taylor, Vanderpump Rules

About tamaratattles

Come for the tea. Stay for the shade. Not for the easily offended. You're a special snowflake just like everyone else.

Comments

  1. sundayhare3 says

    September 14, 2017 at 8:52 pm

    I am not kidding, I said this in another post. I don’t hate this show like everyone seems too. I enjoy a little innocent mindless filler once in awhile.

    I think Jax is in LA mode with all the drama he is trying to stir up. He really sticks out like a sore thumb not just because of his LA attitude and lack of farming knowledge and bad manners. But also because he just doesn’t understand a simpler, gentler life. Kind of sad really. I think Brit’s Dad has his number and I am interested to see how this all plays out.

    I also think so much of this is scripted, but that’s ok. I am tired of screeching, whining, pampered women who can’t get out of their own ways.

    Jax are like the Green Acres people with their roles reversed. I loved that show. LOL

    Reply
    • Amanda Elles says

      September 15, 2017 at 11:10 am

      I totally agree with everything you said. I too like the show but thinks 99% of it is scripted. I am a hunter and you never go coyote hunting with a target in the field. And of course you do not talk and of course all the hunting gear was NOT needed. Simple jeans and t-shirt would suffice. Really was stupid!!!!! Cannot stand Brit’s Mom at all. She is just a pushy broad wanting her daughter to marry a man that is on a TV show. Who the hellO are these people acting like that in a church? I do not think that happens ever i.e. the dude on the floor speaking in tongue. If Brit did not think Jack should have been horrified then he needs to take a hike from her. I use to feel sorry for Brit but have now decided they are both misfits and deserve each other.

      Reply
      • tamaratattles says

        September 15, 2017 at 12:27 pm

        I promise you that people in many strict Pentecostal churches do “speaking in tongues’ and act similar to that. This scene did seemed to be a bit staged. Also, when someone is speaking in tongues, there will be someone else sometimes on the opposite side of the sanctuary interpreting it into English. It is very loud and unnerving and not too far off from what was shown. The congregation I am familiar with also follows strict biblical laws and practices on a daily basis. The makeup and jewelry would not be seen in a true Pentecostal church.

        Reply
      • Marsha Marsha Marsha says

        September 18, 2017 at 2:09 pm

        People speak in tongues and a slim few who still handle poison snakes. I have been to quiet a few church’s who have these beliefs. It is not shocking to the people who live there. Women wear no makeup but can now wear slacks under certain instances. The hair is the women’s crowning glory and is long usually worn in a bun. These people are good,hardworking and Godly people. I don’t like them being made fun of because of their religious beliefs. Bravo should be ashamed.

        Beer cheese is awesome. Shred some cheese and add some beer, blend well and chill overnight..yum. ( add pimentos and/or jalapeño if you like)

        Jax is getting way to old to be acting like he has no common sense at all. This show is so stupid that it is a nice change from screeching Dance Moms and housewives who are not married or married just for the sake of the show.

        Reply
        • Marsha Marsha Marsha says

          September 18, 2017 at 2:11 pm

          I meant to reply to Tamra, sorry about that.

          Reply
  2. samael says

    September 14, 2017 at 9:02 pm

    Why is Jax so sweaty? I can’t stand it when “meeting the family” the family actually step up and behave exactly the way that makes my skin crawl.

    i don’t like her dad/brother/best friend…why don’t they believe Brittany that she is happy? Personally the “she’s lost her spark” and “is in a depression” is a new situation.

    What I don’t understand, why is Brittany so glued to Jax..as if he is the only single dude in Beverly hills? He treats her like garbage and wonders why she is depressed?

    Reply
    • Beth Horne-Bowling says

      September 14, 2017 at 10:57 pm

      We’re seeing that Brittany is less ‘Scarlet O’Hara’ and more ‘Honey Boo Boo’ the further we go! Mom lives in a double-wide on her parents’ farm, along with her sister(who has another little house on the property), Brittany’s sister has two kids out of wedlock, one black and one white (and I’m only bringing that up because that makes it obvious that there are different fathers and no husband in sight), Mamaw is pushing going to church and getting married and having babies like it’s the mid 1800’s and frankly if I had a son in his position I’d tell him to RUN LIKE HELL!!! I’m as Southern as they come, raised in the Blue Ridge Mountains, Virginia born and bred, but not every Southern girl is a Belle.
      And I think that young man Aaron had the best manners and comportment of anyone on this show! He dodged a bullet!
      I can’t help but wonder if Brittany has ANY friends that are married, businesswomen, good role-models?

      Reply
      • samael says

        September 14, 2017 at 11:05 pm

        I’m pissed that Jax is playing the moral card about being a single parent! Screw him! It did surprise me that he matched the $$ raised for IVF — that was cool.

        Reply
      • Amanda Elles says

        September 15, 2017 at 11:18 am

        I agree Jax should be horrified that everyone has babies out of wedlock, different fathers, etc. I find that morally un-accepting myself. Although for HIM to make that comment is amusing. I am wondering about Brits entire family and friends…….seem crazy to me…especially the Mom.

        Reply
  3. Spunky2015 says

    September 14, 2017 at 10:50 pm

    Beer cheese on crackers sounds good right about now. Never heard of it and like to see how it’s made. One thing I always liked about Jax is he doesn’t hide who he really is and admits it. Still think Stassi is the one for him.

    Reply
    • T D says

      September 15, 2017 at 6:13 pm

      Sounds being the operative word. Smells like ? What I believe Limburger must smell like. Wouldn’t have durian scented foods in my kitchen. Wish you could have had a sniff of the fresh pear pie baked last night. It turned out so well my Mama slapped herself.

      Reply
  4. Bridgett says

    September 15, 2017 at 12:25 am

    What was up with Tan Mom’s hair? I was so distracted by it. Anyone else feel like she has a crush on Jax? They are probably closer in age than Jax and Britney.

    Reply
  5. TS says

    September 15, 2017 at 9:42 am

    Jax does not think she is depressed. This will be his “reason” when he dumps her, and he will. I can not stand the frosted lipstick on her mother, and it looked like she added a wig to her hair for church. Her dad has got Jax’s number and he is not having it. I wonder how Mamaw felt about Brittany working for Hooters at 20 years old, and living with a man?

    Reply
  6. Jenjen says

    September 16, 2017 at 3:32 pm

    Beer cheese is similar to a classic cheese fondue. In cheese fondue you use kirsch and white wine. In beer cheese you add beer. I think the cheese selection is different, too. It’s hot boozy cheese that you dip bread, veggies, and fruit in. I think you would have to enjoy cheese fondue to like beer cheese.
    .

    Reply
    • tamaratattles says

      September 16, 2017 at 4:09 pm

      Who doesn’t enjoy cheese fondue? 🙂

      Reply
      • Jenjen says

        September 16, 2017 at 10:40 pm

        Exactly…especially with honey crisp apples.

        Reply
    • LA_in_KY says

      September 17, 2017 at 12:10 pm

      Beer cheese is chilled. It has to be refrigerated.

      Reply
      • LA_in_KY says

        September 17, 2017 at 12:11 pm

        it is best with crackers and veggies. It is gross with fruit.

        Reply
        • T D says

          September 17, 2017 at 2:48 pm

          It entered the domicile as a chilled cheese always a welcome guest. After removing the wrap the character of said cheese quickly became suspect and was escorted outside to the curb where any self respecting fat wouldn’t touch it with a ten foot pole. What”s on your cracker?

          Reply
          • LA_in_KY says

            September 18, 2017 at 11:57 pm

            Beer cheese on a basic saltine cracker baby.

            Reply
  7. GirlFromKY says

    September 17, 2017 at 1:21 pm

    I just wanted to share that I can’t say I’ve ever been to the town where Brittany and her family live, but here in Louisville Kentucky there are no comparisons or similarities to what we see on the show. Most people would probably be really surprised at how cosmopolitan Louisville is. I mean, even our signature horse and breeding farms on the outskirts of Louisville and Lexington, Kentucky are not even close in comparison to what we see in the episodes. I don’t believe for one minute that Britney wears an Aunt Jemima bandana on her head either. Ever. So staged. Because of the Kentucky Derby being here, there is more real money…and I mean old multigenerational blue blood money that goes through this town which I can assure you does compare to the top wealthiest cities in the United States. I just didn’t want people to think that the whole state of Kentucky is like what is seen on the show. We’re lucky to have good people who live in all the various types of areas we have in the Bluegrass State, including Britney’s home town too.

    Reply
    • Marsha Marsha Marsha says

      September 18, 2017 at 2:17 pm

      Preach girl !

      Reply
    • LA_in_KY says

      September 19, 2017 at 12:00 am

      I live in Winchester, KY, and it is a 15 minute drive to Lexington. We are not in the middle of no where.

      Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Come For The Tea, Stay For The Shade!

  • Y’all PLEASE Wear A Mask. PLEASE.
  • Southern Charm Recap: Treehouse of Cards Part 1
  • RHOSLC Recap: In Hot Water
  • RHOC Recap: Making Waves
  • Fact Check: Is Farrah Abraham On The Cover Of Harper’s Bazaar?
  • RHOD Recap: You Dim Sum, You Lose Sum
  • Below Deck Recap: Blood In The Water

SEARCH TAMARA TATTLES

Recent Comments

  • LMD on Southern Charm Recap: Treehouse of Cards Part 1
  • Karebear on Southern Charm Recap: Treehouse of Cards Part 1
  • tamaratattles on Y’all PLEASE Wear A Mask. PLEASE.
  • tamaratattles on RHOSLC Recap: In Hot Water
  • tamaratattles on Southern Charm Recap: Treehouse of Cards Part 1
  • 4paz on Southern Charm Recap: Treehouse of Cards Part 1
  • tamaratattles on Southern Charm Recap: Treehouse of Cards Part 1

Archives

Privacy Policy

Copyright © 2021 · Metro Pro on Genesis Framework · WordPress · Log in