By Guest Contributor Becky J.
I’m so into RHOD this season. I feel like it’s all the fabulous that Orange County is no longer. There are real fresh friendships, relationship and family issues and actual rich people! I love it!
The episode opens at Stephanie and Travis’ new house. They are meeting with the interior designer to discuss the renovations and redecorating. Stephanie says there is no budget, Travis disagrees. Her rationale is that Travis bought the house without her consent, so she can do whatever she wants. I actually think this seems fair, but she seems to always forget she’s married to an overbearing, controlling, egomaniacal bloated frat boy who thinks she is his Barbie doll. He scoffs at her ideas for the house and then plays the “I make the money” card. It’s embarrassing to watch.
Brandi and Bryan go to the doctor together because they have baby fever and want to try for a boy. Brandi talks about her tight “mommy makeover” tummy tuck and recent miscarriage. The doctor assures her that the two things are not related and they agree to move forward with some fertility tests.
LeeAnne and D’Andra (the two most annoying names ever to type) meet to rehash the Halloween party. D’Andra comes out guns blazing and suddenly she’s my new favorite! She calls LeeAnne out on 1. how tacky it was to wear a costume making fun of Stephanie in her own home, 2. what a hypocrite she is for pretending to be an inspirational speaker when she’s petty and insecure AF and 3. tells her she can’t keep using the abused carnie child excuse anymore. She breaks it off! I retract what I said about “poor D’Andra” a couple weeks ago. She can hold her own.
LeeAnne’s weak excuse is that Stephanie is a social climber. Her evidence of this is that Stephanie bought the new house (that she didn’t even want and hates) in the most exclusive neighborhood and awarded Kameron’s princess outfit first prize in her costume contest. She says Stephanie is angling to be Kameron’s BFF because it’s an elevator to the top of Dallas society. It’s pathetic how jealous LeeAnne is and still obsessed with this whole “Dallas society” thing.
Brandi is planning a trip to Tennessee and will be seeing her long-lost Grandfather, with whom she reunited last season on the show. I believe he was referred to as Estranged Grandfather AKA EGF. This season, EGF is recovering from a stroke, but still up for a visit.
So, now we are at the “PositiviTea” charity event for women with HIV again, just like last season. They have asked LeeAnne to do an encore keynote address this year. Most of ladies are there, minus Cary and Stephanie. LeeAnne’s speech is fine. It’s hard to take her seriously in a philanthropic setting when she acts like a vindictive psycho with the maturity level of a 14 year-old girl (I’m being generous) on the show.
Leathery attention seeker, Heidi Dillon, joins the group for some nonsensical conversation. I hope that poor editing was to blame for the disjointed chat. It started with LeeAnne pointing out Heidi’s shoes, then Kameron talking about how her dog has a Cavalli romper and then we cut to Brandi in her one-on-one bashing them for being materialistic. When LeeAnne talked about her matching hot dog costume with her own dog Brandi says she thought the dog should have been a can of beans so they could be “frank and beans” and Kameron shades Brandi for knowing what franks and beans are. I think. I guess the point of this scene is that these two don’t like each other.
Nasty Heidi brings up Travis and Stephanie’s new house cuz she lives across the way. LeeAnne, conniving bitch that she is, innocently says to Brandi, “She hasn’t mentioned this to you?” Brandi looks uncomfortable and shakes her head. I feel bad for her. They all chime in that the house is a money pit built on marshland. LeeAnne says Stephanie bought the house because she’s desperate to be part of Dallas society. Flash back to Brandi screaming at LeeAnne last year about being superficial too obsessed with Dallas society. Not much has changed. Except Brandi is keeping her mouth shut. For now.
Speaking of keeping her mouth shut, D’Andra has more awful, humiliating meetings on camera with her mom. She wants to move to a new office space, update the eye cream packaging and make the employees stop rolling their eyes at her. Her mom does the usual, shames her spending habits, lectures her like she’s 17 and that’s that. Later, D’Andra approaches her mom again (wearing a to-die-for Chanel outfit) and they have a more direct and heartfelt convo, but still nothing is really solved regarding her mom’s retirement.
Cary and Kameron meet for drinks on a rainy night wearing black. It’s a super big deal that Kameron is wearing black and not pink. Also they’re sitting on a patio and it’s slightly drizzly. Kameron has forgotten her umbrella, but don’t worry because her pink Birkin bag has it’s own little rain poncho. She needs to stop talking about the Birkin like now. It’s enough already. Cary is planning a big fourth birthday bash for Zuri. It’s official: Kameron hates Brandi. She calls her “simple” because she lives in the “outskirts” of Dallas. Oh for fucksakes.
Meanwhile across town, Brandi and Stephanie are meeting for their “first date” in awhile. They do not carry Birkins. I still like them. They start with shots—yeah buddy. Brandi brings up LeeAnne talking shit about Stephanie’s new house and calling her a society wannabe. Stephanie denies this and I believe it. Brandi then does a DEAD-on impression of Kameron that makes me laugh. Just like that, Brandi and Stephanie are back.
Brandi comes over to see Stephanie’s new house, which she immediately dubs “Chateau Shutthefuckup” which is my favorite line of the whole episode. Brandi loves the house, Stephanie loves that she loves it. Brandi confides that although she may be cordial with LeeAnne, she would never allow that crazy lady in her house. Stephanie says she is going to have that rule in this new house after the 2-face Halloween debacle. They are so back in love that they decide to prank call Heidi Dillon cuz they can see her home from the window. Also they are ridiculous.
At Zuri’s birthday, which is really cute and fancy, but not too over-the-top because it is just at Cary and Mark’s home and it’s not a huge group. It’s a Housewives party actually for the KIDS, which I love. So, Brandi brought pink metallic gift bags with bottles of Jack Daniel’s Tennessee Fire for Cary and Stephanie. This is her way of inviting them on the girls’ trip to Memphis. The problem is that she chooses to present them while Kameron is standing right there—and Kameron is not invited. Not that she would want to go. She’s just a spoiled brat and mad that she didn’t get a pink present. I guess she owns all things pink the way Ramona owns royal blue. Puh-leeze.
Instead of doing the polite and socially appropriate thing (because Housewives) and excusing herself to check on her kid or drifting away to join another conversation, Kameron stands there with a shitty look on her face. After Cary and Stephanie calm down about the trip, she sarcastically addresses Brandi. She gives her a condescending lecture on etiquette IN FRONT OF HER KID. I’m fucking disgusted with Kameron. Sure, Brandi was a little overzealous. She should have taken Cary and Stephanie aside, but what the fuck? Shaming Brandi over something stupid in front of her kid while her own kid is off with the nanny at a fucking birthday party tells me exactly what this bitch is all about.
Brandi somehow manages to keep her cool. She tells Kameron she’s sorry she feels that way. Then she makes her own sarcastic/truthful crack about wanting to purposely exclude Kameron. Kameron is like a dog with a pink bone. She runs to tattle to her husband (he’s also there, but they still brought a nanny) and it seems like this is going to be the thing that she officially hates Brandi for forever. Awesome. Kameron’s a natural-born Housewife.
Next week: Memphis for half the group, Brandi deals with some heavy family stuff and the rest sit back in Dallas and talk shit. This is getting good!
Thank you Becky J. I love this season. I am actually happy that a real housewives franchise that is entertaining is still possible. And who knew this would be the one? Hunh!
Kameron is one thirsty bitch! What she should’ve done was exit the scene when Brandi apologized that she didn’t have a gift for her — but no, she wanted to make this entire scene about her. You’re not friends with Brandi so why would you think you deserved an invitation to see her sick grandfather, whom she never met? This bimbo really needs to have several seats in the “me so thirsty” section at Dallas airport. Send this crack head packing…
Kameron’s a stupid….. four-letter-word. I wanted the mini-horses to trample her for that entire ridiculous exchange with Brandi.
Kameron keeps touting her own intelligence (despite being blonde), but have we seen any indication of intellect on the show? Does she say witty things and I’ve missed them all because I’ve spent the last few weeks on a tour of the Deep South and have some catching up to do?
(Side note, she-crab soup changed my life. I wish we had it up here. Fuck Manhattan clam chowder. I know better now.)
She crab soup is the best thing on earth. It is all I eat in Charleston. I literally roam form restaurant to restaurant eat a cup of she crab soup and the go to the next restaurant I see and do it again. I repeat this process until I explode.
Omg I would give my right arm to taste that darling it sounds divine x
Add a shot of sherry before eating. HEAVEN.
Kameron is a joke. From her pink dog food to her continuing to tout her bilingual children, who speak a few words of Spanish to her obsession with all things pink. Her DH has her number. I think she believes she can bully Brandi because Brandi is “beneath her” and her big-deal social position. If the so-called society women shown on this show are any example (looking at you too Heidi), Dallas society is comprised with barnyard animals, not refined individuals.
As much as Kameron is vile, that child is pretty darn intelligent. Her “few words” of Spanish are better than I could ever muster…
Agreed, the kid seems to be picky up Spanish pretty quickly.
I guess I have a different opinion but I love Leeanne, Kameron, D’Andra and Brandi a little. Stephanie I can not stand, I feel there is something about her that is sneaky and she has something up her sleeve. If I were Brandi when Stephanie basically confirmed that she did say all of those things about her, her husband and kids I would have walked out the door. I think Stephanie is a social climber because that’s what her husband wants, he wants to be friends with the Wescotts. And I love Kameron she may be quirky and like pink and wants to sell pink dog food but who cares, shes rich and can do whatever she wants and I’m jealous, I wish I had her life.
This post sounds planted. Either you’re on the show or paid by someone who is.
Agreed…..
Agreed!
LOL, I wish
Stephanie works out at my gym. She’s actually very nice and normal.
Kameron is a snooty rich hateful person..she is the mean girl. She thinks unless you have money then you aren’t worth anything..great lesson to teach kids. Don’t get to know a person judge them on their wallet if they are good enough…I may not have her money but I have more class than she does.
Plus she speaks like a dumbass Valley Girl from the Eighties, although they probably had more interesting things to say.
Gag me with a spoon!
AMEN!!!
Don’t forget zip code…just a fat wallet isn’t good enough. I live in Texas and a lot of people act like that. One of the follow up questions after introducing is what neighborhood your from.
Kameron is such a snob, it’s so obvious that she doesn’t think Brandi belongs where she is, and I think she only gives Stephanie a pass because she’s slightly higher in the pecking order than Brandi. It’s clear that Stephanie and her husband have a lot more money than they act like they have, or rather they are a lot more down to earth than you might expect for how rich they are. I guess I don’t know why she tolerates LeeAnne if those are her criteria for a person’s value in the world.
Kameron’s capability to hold the viewer’s interest is about as high as her potential orders for pink dog food. Nil. Brandi’s imitation of her was spot on and hilarious! Brandi and Stephanie are fun to watch together and I am glad to see they are patching things up. All those good things said, I have to ask, what is up with Brandi’s eyebrows? Their shape and placement are disturbing to me and in certain shots she looks more Vulcan than Human and I don’t want that for her. Perhaps as her friendship grows with Cary, she will be advised by Cary & the good doctor to readjust whatever Botox or fillers Brandi is doing.
Regarding Brandi’s eyebrows…. I agree! Very distracting look on her and detracts from her natural beauty. The shape and placement also give her already smallish eyes a smaller look and make them look overly wide for her face. Someone please help her redo her look!
Aw, lay off poor Brandi with the eyebrows!
She’s just had a miscarriage, she’s blaming herself for getting her tummy stitched too small, her husband treats her horribly and looks like he smells of cheese, and her BFF pretty much spent the last year selling her out. Surely we can allow Brandi some wonky brows if we’re gonna forgive LeeAnne’s clown blusher from last year!
Even at some of my life’s lowest points my eyebrows were always on point. It’s a small thing you can do to make yourself feel better and look like you’re half trying.
Thus far, I have really been enjoying this franchise! What I value most about this group is that their interpersonal relationships and storylines seem genuine. D’Andra and her mother’s business partnership, Stephanie and Travis’ marital woes and Brandi’s pregnancy struggles are all real, relatable issues that come across to the viewer as entertaining and above all, REAL. This franchise is a far cry from the vulgar, scripted, disjointed mess that is the RHOC.
I don’t care for the teenage girl antics of Brandi and Stephanie. ITs like they are stuck in middle school and all, and are obsessed with their own actions. Stephanie is far smarter than she behaves and so is Brandi but to get her they revert back to stupid. D’Andra is one I like, and that husband of hers is hot as hell. There is something about Carrie that annoys me, could be her mouth Nd how she makes faces, not sure but I do love that she wants to be with her daughter more. LeeAnns make up is better this year but she is still as crazy as ever and that should be very entertaining.
I am loving me some of that D’Andra in this episode. She totally took LeeAnne to task, was 100% on point, and told her everything that I was fantasizing about saying myself. LeeAnne did not do her typical, over-the-top, angry reaction because she very much values D’Andra’s position in the community and does not want to alienate her, hence the self-control. This tells me that she is able to actually control her emotions, and makes me wonder about how truly authentic her outbursts are!
Really loving this season, D’Andra is everything and gave it right back to Leanne when she was coming with her bullshit.
Like most on here I really wasn’t a fan of this show last season… incessant babble about ‘charity worlds’ really wasn’t my cup of tea. This year though its like these women have been given a new lease on life! Really enjoying the ladies, just wish they’d show a bit more of the actual city like NYC instead of the majority of filming taking place in their kitchens.
N.b. I don’t know if its her edit but Kameron really needs to pull that stick out her ass. Someone should explain there’s more to life than Birkin bags and pink dog food.
Kameron is so unlikeable. I feel like she is trying so hard to be a Lisa Vanderpump but in a dumb and stupid version.
I don’t like Brandi and Stephanie together. While Brandi gets funnier with her jokes she also kind of gets nastier and meaner on her commentary about people.
How did this dud get so good?
Is it just me.. If I were blindfolded and listening to to most of theses women. I could not guess which one was talking!. What is with the nasal baby voices? Is there something in the water?