Dance Moms: All Choked Up

What happened to the plan to have Cheryl Ann Burke replace Abby? Is she coming after Laurieann Gibson? I thought Laurieann was just there for one episode. Meanwhile, with Abby completely missing in action, Laurieann is back for at least another week. This week, she has a pyramid that is shaped like a capital “A” she calls it her “A” list. Brynn is on the bottom and so is Kendall. Because, losers. Ditto Cameryn and Maesi and Kalani. The minis were on the second tier with Nia on to the top. Nia is thrilled as Abby rarely let her off the bottom tier.

This week we are going to Fresno. The moms explain the “Fresno Curse” to Laurieann. Nothing good has ever happened in Fresno. Kalani and Brynn are the only two solos. I’m sure Nia was expecting a solo after being on top. Then Laurieann says the group dance is going to be called “Q” and it is going to be about being transgender. Frankly, I don’t think that is an appropriate topic for some of the younger dancers. In fact, I don’t think it should be a dance theme at all for any of them. But more importantly, it’s the “T” in LGBTQ that stands for transgender. Nonetheless, we shall forge ahead. The minis and Maesi’s are kicked out of the group dance.

Kalani’s solo is very difficult and she’s exhausted in rehearsal. Brynn’s choreography is also hard and not the usual cutesy stuff that Abby gave her. In the group dance, Camryn has her first lead as a male to female transexual boy. 

Yolanda is pissed that Eliana is not in the dance. Ellie tried to keep her from confronting Laurieann, but she did anyway. That got her nowhere, now Yolanda wants Ellie to go to Laurieann and give her the some of my best friends are trans speech. Ellie doesn’t want to but Yolanda tells her that her trans friend will be disappointed if she doesn’t. So Ellie asks her what to say, and she nervously does what she is told. Laurieann puts her in the dance. When Lauriann tells the moms, Lily’s mom, Stacey, says that she heard Yolanda telling Ellie exactly what to say. Laurieann is pissed but had to go to a video shoot. Yolanda and Stacey get into it. Yolanda says something about her psychiatric therapy and Stacey shoots back that she does treat dissociative identity disorder in her practice.  Camryn’s mom who is sitting sort of between the two says in her Phaedra Parks voice, “Oh…we just got diagnosed…” It was hysterical. I need a gif. Yolanda calls Stacey a bitch. She retorts, “At least I am only one bitch, you’re like three bitches.” Everyone cracks up loudly. All of them except for the target, Yolanda. Who walks out the door. Everyone else is still laughing their asses off.

Yolanda goes to get Ellie who at that moment in time is a couple of feet away from the other two girls. Yolanda starts telling the girls to stop bullying Ellie because she has feelings. Once again, Ellie has no idea what is going on and starts crying and telling her they are not bullying her and telling the girls not to listen to her. Part of me thinks this is Ellie auditioning for acting jobs. But you never know. I don’t think Yolanda can play crazy this well. It’s Academy Award worthy if that is the case. Yolanda goes outside. Lily comes to tell Stacey that Yolanda was yelling in her face tell her she’s a bully. Stacey leaps up to go outside after Yolanda. Camryn’s mom is all….I’ll just stay here and watch the kids.

Stacey confronts Yolanda by yelling at her and Yolanda goes straight for Stacey’s throat trying to choke her out. Security breaks things up and Stacey is screaming for the police. AND SCENE….

The next day Yolanda is still there at rehearsal and so is Stacey. The moms force Stacey to accept a half-assed apology from Yolanda because Laurieann is threatening to walk out. Laurieann says the minis will not be in the group dance. Her friend Rocko speaks to the team about his transition.

Brynn’s solo was great and totally out of the box. Is it too “music video” for the dance competition circuit? We’ll have to see. But I loved it.

Kalani killed her solo. The choreography might have been a bit more difficult than Brynn’s. It was definitely out of the box and stretched her comfort zone. It’s just a matter of what the judges thought.

Laurieann points out that both girl had some stamina issues at the end where they got tired.

The group dance was AMAZING. Camryn was AMAZING. I’ve never seen her featured before and we finally get to see why she is on the team. Also, the whole transgender theme I was leery of at first mad perfect sense in the dance. I’m so used to Abby Lee’s weird political dances that I just couldn’t visualize what I just saw. They should win. Especially since there appears to be no competition there at all. Where do all those fans outside the venue go when the competition starts?

In the solos, Kalani took second place. Brynn did not place. The group came in second. Laurieann says that they lost because of the mothers. Yolanda plays the victim. Laurieann cries tears of anger. She is frustrated with the mothers. Next week, Laurieann takes the gloves off and her inner Abby Lee comes out.

Speaking of Abby Lee, every time I watch this I wonder if she is watching from prison.