Someone on Twitter informed me that Andy Cohen called TamaraTattles.com “that ratchet website” today. I did not believe it. I wanted it to be true but I did not believe it. BUT IT’S TRUE! OMG! YES!
Okay, gather around, y’all. This is so good. So Amy Phillips who does all the housewives parodies apparently has a show on Andy’s Sirius Radio called Reality Checked. She is about to have her baby so Andy hosted in her place today. So I had to sign up for a free trial to hear what he said. Thankfully it happened right at the beginning. First he let us know he and Michael were the only two white people at the Real Housewives of Potomac Reunion yesterday. It will be a two-part reunion. Andy says Juan is in the top three hottest house husbands. I don’t know who Juan is. Then he gave us an update on a troubling zit he has. He still has a tiny bit of a scar. I AM NOT MAKING THIS UP.
But then, the first story that wasn’t about him was about ME! It was amazing and I can barely type this! He reads from some other site who was quoting me, and just like Wendy Williams this morning he pronounced my name like a yankee. But he mentioned the site a couple of times. I tried to write down his quote. It went something like this, ” TamaraTattles.com is a website…that I think Kenya M0ore…. she’s always breaking Kenya Moore news and it’s usually turns out to be correct. So my theory is that Kenya or her Gay Best friend one of those two are the source for this website. Because she is always breaking news about Kenya. (laughs). Everything else she says is made up. But the Kenya stuff always ends up being true. So, I think I figured out who her source is. I don’t know, I think we’re going to have to wait on Kenya. But it would make sense, we’re not filming Real Housewives of Atlanta at this moment (um, yes they are) So why wouldn’t she get married when we’re not shooting. and do something important like that?”
Then he moves on to another question about Phaedra. He says knows the answers these questions but he just can’t say… “except for the Keyna story I don’t know, but that ratchet website, I mean they seem to know, and I think it’s true, I think Kenya writes that website!” He still refuses to confirm that Phaedra was fired and he doesn’t want to confirm that Nene is full time.
So it’s true! I got married in St. Lucia! Um, I mean Kenya got married in St. Lucia.
While I am thrilled that Andy has been reading all the posts on this site and assessed the veracity of the stories herein, I can’t imagine how he actually believes that Kenya and Brandon have enough time to put in the sixteen hours a day I put into this ratchet site. I thought he was somewhat more aware of the work that goes into a website than the people who accuse me of being Kathryn, or Kenya, Caroline or I forget who all I am supposed to be. Oh I still have people who think I am Tamra Judge.
Anyway, it’s been a great day! Both Andy Cohen and Wendy Williams shouted me out on their shows today. Andy called me ratchet but says he believes the story. Wendy said she loved the site but didn’t believe the story!
In other fun stuff about me today,sites are claiming that Kenya couldn’t be married because there is no marriage license (Um see when you get married in …oh nevermind), or because the resort denied that it happened (the same people that made my source delete her photos from the beach?) , others say she was working, or filming something, (with invisible cameras?) or that Kenya pays me to write stories about her (I’m sure she is pissed I scooped the story she was going to sell, because you see they don’t pay sites to write about them, sites pay them) the versions are endless. And hysterical. But nothing tops Andy Cohen’s version! NO THING!
It is quite simple. A Tamara Tattles spy was in St. Lucia. She took photos on the beach and she was forced to delete them, then she got two from her garden room patio. She watched the short happy event with her own eyes. I got lucky because I have lots of great readers here.
So Twirl On THAT!
OMG! Y’all. Remember when the deplorables were posting my photo everywhere? During the Great Exodus of 12 Cat Ladies with brain tumors?
Well someone just sent me my photo from LSA. I guess they got tired of schmears of makeup on fat hands are over there now.
Because here I am!
I am SOFA KING PISSED Y’ALL!
I prefer the one in my pretty pink dress for summer. I mean the sun is out and so is my belly button!
Why not use this one? I dun told y’all on Twatter I got a haircut for summer, do keep up!
In other news, LSA has new management or something because they actually link to the sites they are talking about and are concerned about DCMA violations. They still use THE WHOLE POST, but it’s progress.
This whole day is HILARIOUS. There is someone having a complete meltdown because, I don’t deserve any credit for my work because… I forget why… And someone else saying that my working 16 hours days proves I am frauding the government out of disability.
This day went from another shitty Quarterly Tax Day to the most hysterical day ever.