2016 was a really crappy year in so very many ways, and one of those ways was all of the tropical storms and hurricanes. Three Bravo shows were affected by the weather. First, Top Chef Charleston filming was impacted by Tropical Storm Bonnie, and tonight, Hurricane Matthew will send the cast from Southern Charm Savannah to Charlotte where they run into some of the cast of Southern Charm. Most all of the Southern Charm folks were in Charlotte except for Kathryn who went to Virginia with someone. All of Southern Charm Savannah went to Charlotte except for Ashley who went to her mother’s house in Augusta.
Ashley seems to have stolen Nelson’s spot as the narrator for the previous episode. This is really the Ashley show.
But before we get to Charlotte, we have to get through this dinner party from hell. When we left off, Daniel was confronting Nelson about referring to him with as, ‘schvartzer’ a Yiddish word for black person that has a derogatory connotation. Nelson says he didn’t know the word is racist, or else he was using it in a metaphoric way, or it was allegorical. (un)Happy is crying about this topic because (un)Happy is making this all about (un)Happy. (un)Happy says people just her for dating someone of a difference race. Lyle, tries to defend Nelson and then he just storms out of the dinner lest the light be shined on him. There is a mass exodus of offended people stomping out the door like children.
But the guys only make it to the porch. They are all wasted. Daniel starts a verbal tirade about not being able to be in some club because he is Jewish. Really? Why is everyone being whiney little brats tonight? Nelson was racist yesterday and will be racist tomorrow. What this all they could come up with for the dinner party storyline? Was, “Holy Crap a hurricane is coming where are we going to go?” even tossed around as an idea?
The next day everyone evacuates for the hurricane in the most ridiculous fashion. During an evacuation, everyone takes their cars. There is no carpooling. You pack your car full of every valuable that will fit and you get the hell out of dodge. It looks like Nelson and Ashley are going to Augusta and everyone else is going to Charlotte. They are also leaving super early because there is not traffic on the roads at all.
Before Catherine and Ashley can evacuate they have to meet on a square and discuss the drama at the dinner party. Catherine apologizes for saying that Ashley has an open marriage. Ashley does not apologize for saying that Catherine is cheating on Lyle.
In Augusta, Ashley’s mom, Virginia, is everything the old coot from Southern Charm wishes she was. He house is beautiful inside and out and crammed full of art and antiquities. Ashley’s mama is a pistol as well. On social media she was letting the people trash talking Ashley have it will full force. She is quite the character.
Nelson plays us some Ode to Joy on the obligatory piano before leaving to go see his family. Then Ashley and her mom both enjoy a proper cup of tea. Ashley opens up to her mother about the state of her marriage. Ashley lets us know that her parents kicked her out when she got pregnant and they were estranged for a bit. But they are very close now.
In Charlotte, Louis is working on a pop up shop for his socks in a bar. Because they are in a bar, Shep is there. Also most of the guys know Shep, because everybody knows Shep. As a nod to Shep’s upcoming spinoff, he mentions that his siblings live in Charlotte and he has been playing with his nieces and nephews all day and it made him want a kid. Shep does not want a kid.
Buy the time the Savannah girls arrive, Hannah realizes that Louis is “going full Lou.” This apparently is his version of Tequila Katie. Hannah is not happy about this. The hurricane party rages on into the night.
The next morning at the hotel, there is a fire alarm and everyone has to evacuate hungover and half nekkid in the rain. They make the best of it and just do a recap scene of the events of the party. It appears that Shep and Austen are at a different hotel. Lyle is passed out in the room.
Later in the pouring rain they go to lunch and to get pedicures. I had real time photos of all the Charlotte stuff but I cannot find the post to save my soul. Louis takes the boys to a sock factory. It is just as exciting as you might imagine. Louis seems like the kind of guy that is often told to put a sock in it.
Later the whole Charlotte crew meets up to go bowling. Shep shows up as well with Thomas. Catherine starts treating Thomas like a therapist and drunk therapy ensues. Catherine has issues with marrying Lyle. Thomas the drunken marriage counselor is odd. Thomas says he doesn’t even want to get married anymore because he got what he wanted out of it, two kids. And there you have it. Kathryn was nothing but a baby breeder with good genes and great lineage.
At the bowling alley they see the news on TV about how bad Matthew was. Hilton Head where Shep is from was hit hard with tons of flooding. River street in Savannah had a lot of flooding. The tides on Tybee Island came way up. It was bad. For some reason Happy and Az did not evacuate.
On the trip back lots of gas stations are out of gas. When they finally get back home, there is a good bit of damage. Lots of downed trees.
Next week: We’re back to bickering about things that don’t matter. And Happy’s mom returns. I wish this show would have been all about their parents. They are way more awesome.
On a side note, my brother used to play “Ode to Joy” and Jesu Joy of Mans Desiring” on our organ every evening while I was in bed. Nelson’s piano playing was absolutely beautiful!
My dad loved “ode to joy”, made me smile to hear it.
The first ten minutes pissed me off to no end. Who in the world talks like that? It was a reminder as to why I never dated any frat guys in college. And I was a soriety chick.
I know I spelled sobriety incorrectly. I actually live in the country so my internet sucks. Those guys just remind me of all of those rich fake buttholes I went to college with. A few were really nice guys, but most were like those that were quick to call other dudes “pussies” if you called them out. Uugghh they make me want to puke
Well that is kind of the premise of the show. Most people want to see how the other half lives .., reality tv was meant for an escape !
The sock thing is weird. Giving away socks at a bar is weird. Do people on Southern Charm get MBAs from business school for dummies? Happy is unbelievably unhappy. So unhappy. The guys are annoying and try too hard to be cool. Just a pack of dorks but going bald (nothing wrong with it), but an observation.
Ashley’ s mom looks young. I am familiar with the bar where they had their sock pop up shop. Sort of a frat vibe in what would be Charlotte’ s version of Buckhead. My sons go there and they do have good wings.
Whoever cast this show should be fired. I’ve forced myself to sit through five episodes now, and while reading this recap, I kept realizing that I still don’t remember most of their names. Ashley and Catherine are entertaining, but the rest are as dull as dishwater and instantly forgettable.
Agree. I am lucky to get 3 of them. ASHley needs to cut back on exfoliating her face.. So shiny, they may have to put a filter on her when they film so no lighting flash back.
I agree, JFarmer. I have tried to like it, but I just can’t. Plus having a distant relative on it who is about as bright as a 4 watt bulb does not help and makes me hang my head in shame. The dude is a moron!
Happy and Hannah have to be about the two most miserable folks around.
Ashley is amusing, but it us in a sad little girl lost sort of way. The guys are all as dull as dishwater.
I am interested to know which one is your relative?
I heard the comment Thomas made about the children. For him, all it ever was about was lineage and pedigree.
Lineage and pedigree have been mentioned exactly word for word every episode and article for years. I have a strong feeling no one who brings this up over and over ever knew what these words meant let alone use the words ever before this show. He is old as dirt and used a chick he was sexually attracted to that he knew was looking for a rich man to get kids out of. She just didn’t get the lifestyle she expected out of it and fot dragged through court losing custody because of her drug problem.
Am I the only one who had no clue what the offensive S word until today?
No, I don’t think many of us are fluent in Yiddish.
And therein lies the lesson – if you truly aren’t fluent in a language and aren’t quiet sure what the meaning is of a word… YOU DON’T FUCKING USE THE WORD IN CONVERSATION.
Oy vey.
There is usually a contextual clue.
My one encounter with that word was a zillion years ago, during a 3-day job with a postage-stamp dealer in the Wall St area. Day 2, my boss started on a rant about “the stupid schwartze illiterates” at the post office. On day 3, he reprised the rant, and as an encore, stole a dozen copies of the NY Times for the price of one from a sidewalk vending box (he used the papers as packing material).
A phone call with my (Jewish, albeit very secular mama) that night confirmed my surmise about the target of the guy’s prejudice. Before Day 4 dawned, I decided it’d be better to seek a new crummy-paying job rather than risk incurring an ulcer in my early-20s or possible arrest for punching a massive a-hole in the eye.
In short: anyone who uses that term and claims s/he does not realize it is racist is totally pants-on-fire lying.
Well I studied German in college.. but didn’t quite get the way it was used for this person.
Perhaps because Yiddish and German are two different languages?
My eyes must be playing tricks on me because the last pic of the guy in the checkered shirt sitting with the blonde looks like a younger, thicker Thomas Ravenal No? (I don’t watch this show.)
It is Thomas. It was a crossover episode.
Oh shit! Thanks!
The occasional glance at the actual post tends to be somewhat enlightening….
I did read that Shep was there (spinoff) but must have missed where you mentioned Thomas. My bad!
I literally cannot tell the difference between Happy and Hannah!
I missed most of it – I dozed on and off during last week’s and this week’s episodes. Thank goodness for the recaps!
BUT, don’t need to know much about the Nelson dude.
A normal, non racist person would have said “OH MY GOD, I didn’t realize it had bad connotations. I am so sorry. Sincerely. Please accept my apologies. I will never use it again.”
Racists defend themselves, talk about people being too PC, say “your Grandma used it!” even when confronted with a specific, clear cut example like this. Wasn’t there mention of a grandmother using the word? Well, Grandma may have been a racist cunt. Or, just changing times. My grandma used the word negro. But it was 1938. She wasn’t using it by the 70s and 80s, and I sure as hell don’t use it.
While I think the phrase “white privilege” is bandied around too much – anyone else taken aback by how unHappy made it about her, when it was her fiance who was called that name and is the person of color? Kinda selfish white privilege in a sense. I mean, she isn’t immediately judged when she walks in a room alone, or through the airport, etc. It is only when she’s with him. I mean, I get why she was upset – I’d probably never speak to friends who defended calling my fiance a name like that (who wants racists as friends?). But the this is so hard on me thing took me aback.
Yeah. Her response was kinda eerily reminiscent of A Williams’ character in “Get Out” (which is such a good horror flick, it scared even this person’s bland, Wonder-Bread-white self to the marrow).
Nelson could honestly not be more disgusting, ranting how the “independently wealthy” always get shit on.
He isn’t independently wealthy. What a joke.
What bar did they go to?
Selwyn Pub in Charlotte.
Well now we get it out of the horses mouth, Thomas never had any intention of marrying KD and has no intention of marrying Landon or anyone. He’s got what he wanted. He said at the reunion that if they went to court he would crucify her and that’s exactly what he did. No wonder she doesn’t trust him.
Yeah, hard to believe Thomas said it out loud even though it’s not even remotely surprising. He’s run his entire life like this, bucking his “blue blood.” Did he actually think his father would come to a birthday party for a grandchild born out of wedlock and the man is 112 years old, with corresponding values? Amazing.
I can’t tolerate this actual show, though. Who thought putting that Nelson psycho on television was a good idea?
This show is annoying, but Tamara, your recaps are so funny!