Ashley and Anthony (Bahamas)
We last left these two in bed about to consummate their marriage. Ashley got up early and got her hair and makeup together. Anthony really wanted to sleep in but that was hard with the camera man in their honeymoon suite.
Ashley is wanting to have babies right away. She’s doing that 30 thing. Sometimes I think we would all do better in life if we didn’t know our age. Anthony and Ashley are both very comfortable with each other. At dinner Anthony shares that he was in love once and that meddling friends and her over sharing outside the relationship caused problems. Ut. Oh. Ashley says she was in a five-year relationship with someone who was six years older and who was not ready to have kids. She had to move on.
Despite all the rain, these two had the best honeymoon. I don’t think that Anthony understands Ashley’s need to have kids soon. I agree she does not have another five years to wait.
Cody and Danielle (St. Thomas)
Cody seems to know that Danielle wants him to man up a bit. This couple is the only one that has not had sex yet. Danielle is perfectly capable of taking the lead, but would prefer more traditional gender roles. Dr. Pepper just said that Danielle needs to lower her expectations when it comes to manliness. She thinks Danielle has unrealistic expectations in that regard. Dr. Pepper is an idiot and this pairing is stupid. Just because they are in similar work fields does not make them a match. Every time Danielle has to fish Cody out of the ocean and take over the jetski driving, Danielle is less attracted to him. They could have totally paired her with someone who less in touch with his feminine side. Why should Danielle “lower her expectations? Anthony would have been a good match for Danielle.
Later, these two go ziplining. Danielle is all badass and Cody says he will probably scream like a little girl and he is really afraid of heights. Let’s just divorce these two now. Perhaps I am projecting onto Danielle, but safety is a huge issue with me and relationships. I generally bolt when I no longer feel safe in a relationship, or I emasculate the guy so that he bolts. Have I mentioned I really suck at relationships? My relationship with my dog sometimes tests my relationship skills. But if Danielle doesn’t feel like she is safe with Cody rather than constantly having to be the one to make him feel safe, in my opinion, this will never work. Sidenote: my remote just hit the side of my computer causing me to go to a TV channel I have never seen where a whackadoodle evangelist is saying that a huge inheritance is coming into my life. YAY! It’s a sign. Oh wait. As I am updating the recap he says that I am doing something to block my inheritance. #Shocking
Of course Danielle ziplines first with no issues. Cody has a nervous breakdown before he goes. He says his wife is inspiring him to try new things and conquer his fears. Danielle is questioning the match. It’s not her job to make him a man.
Later we find out that Cody still lives with his parents. Cody asks how Danielle feels about the relationship. Danielle is basically wanting to see how the sex is. Cody wants to have “a talk.” Oh Lord. Cody says he feels like they are not on the same wavelength. He tells us in confessional he has tendency to say and do the things he feels are going to make the other person happy. Oh Jesus. He says he thinks he has forced the situation a bit and he wants to pull back. Danielle outright lies (based on editing) and says she thinks it is good where they are at.
Shelia and Nate (St Croix)
These two had sex earlier in the honeymoon. On day three they go four wheeling. All of these activities seem more tailored to Nate than Shelia. Nate is having the time of his life. Shelia seem to be politely enduring it. We hear her in confessional say that she could see herself with Nate forever, but who knows when she said that.
Later they play ping pong and when Shelia turns out to be really good at it, Nate becomes extremely aggressive and show that he is not graceful in defeat. This really turns Shelia off and shuts her down. When she tells him it is no fun to play with a sore loser, he says that he will never be okay in situations where he is not succeeding. That’s a red flag. Everyone loses at some point. Also when playing a game with his wife, he should understand that her success is just as important and should be celebrated. During the game he blamed the wind and made it seem like her skill was actually luck. She sums up what I just said by saying that he is coming up with some bullshit to cover up his deficiency of character. While I agree with that and think she is free to say that if she wants to, if she wants to stay in this relationship she needs to come at it in a way that he can receive it. Because that pissed him off. Despite Nate feeling disrespected and being highly pissed, he tries to hold her hand as they walk to the restaurant. She will not allow it. Again this if fine if you are about to kick his ass to the curb. But if you are not, you he just reached out and you cut him off at the knees.
Off camera, Nate tells Sheila he doesn’t want to be married anymore. She says he apologized afterward, but those words were very damaging to her. She doesn’t know how to fix this. She called Pastor Calvin. Shelia cries through a few different wardrobe changes saying that he could have said anything to her other than he didn’t want to be married to her anymore and she would have forgiven him. I get it. But I don’t think she sees her part in this. Pastor Calvin says part of marriage is learning how to deal with it when their partner says hurtful things. He says that Nate is learning how to be a husband and he’s making some big mistakes.
These two go horseback riding the next day and and Shelia is still very resentful. Nate’s horse won’t lead properly and Sheila’s horse refuses to budge. How did production make that happen?
At their last dinner, Nate has an honest conversation with Sheila and tells her that he apologizes for what he said. This seems like it was filmed BEFORE the phone call to Pastor Calvin. But who knows? He says that he felt she disrespected him as the husband and he reacted badly. Sheila is not having it. Did I mention this began over a game of ping pong? And yes, Nate was an ass. But Sheila’s reaction was not any better. As I typed that, Shelia is crying and saying that she realizes that she has not been easy on this honeymoon. But she doesn’t feel heard, and Nate was just focused on having fun and being in an exotic location. She says she can’t focus on fun because guys love her when she was easy to love but no one loves her when she is not easy to love. Oh, sister friend, I feel you. I’ve felt that way many times. But you have to see your role in it. It’s hard to see that when you are pissed off and angry. Maybe if nothing else watching yourself back will show you the times that Nate tried to reach out and you would not let him.
My heart is breaking for Sheila. She is crying. Nate is trying to figure out what she needs. She is sobbing and saying she just needs him to see her. She says he doesn’t see her. She storms away from the table and says she doesn’t want to do anything with him anymore. She is picking up her toys and going home. Been there, done that. She will regret this move.
I know I tend to make this show about myself, but I see myself in Danielle and Sheila, and to a lesser extent Ashley when I was very young. This just makes me sad. Things with Nate and Sheila do get better it seems. Danielle and Cody not so much.
Love at First Sight Second Chances
I am also very involved in this shit show. I just can’t recap it. Both of these series are very long, well over an hour and I can’t recap them when they air. But this is a shit show. Both David and Vanessa are terrible at dating. And the show is heavily produced to make it like a Bachelor, Bachelorette shit show. The men over all trying to out man each other and the women are being bitches. Both “pickers” are making crappy decisions. Feel free to talk about that here as well. There are just a handful of us watching this so we can sort of make our own rules while everyone ignores us. 🙂 And thanks for watching with me.
Nate and Sheila: Watching them is painful. Seeing Nate act so immature over a ping pong game was annoying. Then seeing Sheila put up a wall and shut down was painful. I still have hope for the two of them. I think Nate knows it will be hard finding a mate that accepts him and his family. And Sheila seems to know she has flaws she needs to work on. They’ll make it.
A&A: They are really cute together.
Danielle and Cody: This was the train wreck match that the experts make every year. You know they won’t work and it will be a crash and burn with these two. Danielle wants an extreme alpha male and Cody is cool and laid back and not afraid to show his softer side.
Second chances: I’m disappointed in the bachelor and bachelorette format.
I am glad I am not the only one who is furious about the whole “settling” comment toward Danielle. She wanted a MAN and she got a boy who lives with his parents. As someone who prefers traditional gender roles, this would have been a major theme throughout my intake interviews. How the HELL did they ever match these two?
I feel like Shelia and Nate could work, but you are right, Nate has a lot of growing up to do.
Same with Ashley and Anthony but it is Ashley that needs to grow up and become her own person independent of her family and her sister in particular. I can assure you that when the sister finds a man, she is not going to jeopardize her relationship.
I think Dr Pepper was trying to tell Danielle to reassess her definition of manliness ….perhaps she should lose the stereotype she probably got from watching porn or regular tv and consider his sensitivity and empathy as traits a real man can have. Dr P doesn’t know how much porn Danielle actually watches. That being said-the dude is a wimp and has no confidence so he’s playing the nice guy card because someone told him chicks get turned on by that.. Someone should clue him in. They are doomed.
Sheila is alternatively fake nice and hysterical- she lives every self conscious moment of her life like she”s on a bad reality show…except when she’s gets hysterical and forgets. Nate’s a player. With any luck they’re doomed.
Ashley has no clue who she married and doesn’t care. As long as his juice has good swimmers he’s in! Anthony is a complete and utter tool but that won’t come into play for another 9 months because…well…Ashley’s focused on taking her temperature. their kids are doomed.
I really think Nate is too young to get married. I think he wanted to”win” and be picked for the show, up against 40,000 (a wet dream for him) 🙂
Thanks for the info about the second chances show. Didn’t know if I wanted to check out, but if it’s a Shit show, I’m in.
I’m with Cheryl. Nate wants to win and that is a recipe for disaster. Sheila is really sweet but she needs to learn how to communicate better when she is upset. My husband said the same thing about Anthony and Danielle but I think they are too much alike. Poor Cody. He just seems like the guy that gets he girl because he is cute but once you look deeper there are no thrills! I feel like he is insecure with himself.
I didn’t like Pastor last season and I don’t like him now. I love Dr. Pepper and her advice.
Second Chances is ridiculous! They took two of my favorites and exposed them for the reality star wannabes that they truly are. Ugh! Whyyy!! Can this be anymore forced.
A shit show is the perfect description of Second Chances. I can not believe what an ass David is. I liked him when he was on the first show and thought he was a nice guy who was really trying in the relationship but was matched with a real b*tch. Obviously my initial opinion of him was way off because he annoys the shit out of me this show. I hope he does end up with Mia, those two deserve each other–asshole 1 & 2.
I am so happy you watch and recap this. I still stand firm in my belief that age/maturity will be an issue with Nate and shelia. He just comes off as such a player and now a kind of jerky, insecure one after the ping pong. I also cannot stand that the experts are telling Danielle to lower her expectations. They are trying to cover for making a bad match. I see myself in Danielle for sure when it comes to the adventure and I would feel her same way 100%.
Second chances is just horrible. Production should be embarrassed at how hard they are trying and failing to copy Bachelor (not giving Bach any props either), the girl drama, the one no one likes, not there for the right reasons, group date drama. So lame! I’d much prefer them dating outside of the group scenarios.
Nate is really pissing me off. I know this kind of guy, who hides his ego behind his religion and his need to be the respected leader. This is all just a cover for his desire not to be held accountable, particularly by his wife, this is just such utter bullshit. He acted like an ass, he was competitive, he blamed everything but his lesser skill, and then he accused her of being disrespectful. You diss your wife for wining by “luck” instead of better skills and but think you are being respectful to her? Can you be disrespectful to her, while she must always be respectful and compliant with you? NOPE! And you can’t pull this bullshit and then expect smiles and handholding. Sheila is sensitive and cognizant of this dynamic. Prayer doesn’t cover up this bullshit, not for long. If he wants to be a real Christan servant leader kind of husband, he needs to be humble, introspective and open to feedback.
I’m also turned off by Danielle’s wimpiness. She doesn’t really want traditional gender roles, not really. She won’t be happy for long if he tries to dominate her, or if he were to put her down for being competent, which many alpha men do. Cody is very ballsy to start his own business. He is a gentleman and thoughtful. But she doesn’t have the courage to speak up, which is super passive aggressive on her part.
Danielle totally wants traditional gender roles and has told him several times. I don’t see her being “wimpy” at all. She is telling him that she wants a man who is decisive and takes control. Cody himself has said that is not him and that he just says and does whatever people want to hear.
I agree it’s bullshit to say Danielle needs to lower her expectations. An alpha male can have a softer side (like dad-CT talking about his kid on The Challenge *swoon), but still needs to step up and have the take charge side, which Cody does not have. Cody seems sweet, but extremely immature and inexperienced in relationships, so this relationship seems doomed anyway, but they are definitely mismatched.
Anthony and Ashley seem like a cute match for now. I don’t think he wants to wait 5 years for kids, but probably wants to wait more than a year.
It was uncomfortable watching Sheila and Nate’s interactions once things went left. I think Sheila’s pain was genuine, but she also slipped into “I’ve been wronged” mode pretty quickly, a trait I unfortunately share with her.
I actually know one of the guys vying for Vanessa. He was friends with my brother, and I used to have the biggest crush on him. (We grew up in the same subdivision in John’s Creek when it was still Unincorporated Fulton County). He’s a super chill and decent guy, but he’s admitted to our family he’s doing it solely for exposure and is hoping that this will lead to other tv ventures. Shocking, I know, but a fun little blind item for you, TT
Thanks. I am assuming it was the one that said he was an actor and raised a big red flag with Vanessa. Wait, was that the one that went to Morocco or somewhere for ten days? He ended up in the final.