#WWHL With Bethenny Frankel And Jeff Lewis

I am so excited to recap this episode of WWHL because anything can happen with these two. There are lots of poll questions tonight. First up they talk about Luann not inviting anyone except Dorinda to her wedding. Andy asks if Luann should have invited everyone. Jeff says yes because they have been friends forever. Jeff either doesn’t watch the show, or doesn’t realize these women are not really friends or is just being Jeff. Bethenny said she had no expectation of being invited, she thinks she would have been caned if she went. The people answering the polls are twatwaffles. Jeff says the person that almost broke up the wedding should absolutely be there. Oh, Jeff is going to be salty with Bethenny. This makes my day. Even though I am trying to start off the season liking Bethenny. There really are things I like about her. Ramona has already irked me on the very first episode. I’m trying not to hate everyone except Luann and Dorinda, but dayum it’s hard. 

They show one of Luann’s promotional interviews. Which reminds me of a story. I used to like this comedian named Steven Wright. He was the king of deadpan ironic humor that was in many ways sort of philosophical. He was, and likely still is, a comic genius. I actually didn’t watch a lot of TV back then but I tuned in to several talk shows he was on in a short span to watch him. He said the same thing in every one. This was the beginning of my realization that all the major talk shows pre-interview their guests and they know the questions and their answers before the show even starts. Even more shocking to my young dumb self was that they say the exact same things on every show. Steven Wright was not being deadpan and psuedointellectual on the spur of the moment! It was all scripted! Mock me if you must but there are still people here who believe Sonja Morgan dated Prince Albert of Monaco.

Anyway, Luann’s spiel on every talk show was about the clip in the preview trailer for RHONY where Bethenny is doing the ugly cry pretending to give a shit about Luann and her relationship. All of the interviewers who watch the show pointed out that Bethenny has been calling Lu a whore and trying to derail her wedding ever since it was announced and clearly she hates her. The interviewers themselves mocked the scene. Luann said that Bethenny had a really awful marriage and an even worse divorce and she thinks she was just projecting her feelings onto her. Sidenote: I haven’t heard the concept of projection throwing around this much since my graduate school days. Seriously. Hardly a day goes by here when someone isn’t an armchair psychologist or some sort of adjudicator of moral standards.

Anyway, Bethenny says “Poor Luann, her fiancée is projecting his penis on to other housewives.” Which basically proves everyone’s point.

Amdy shows a clip from RHOA’s finale and Sheree’s housewarming party. I had forgotten her attempt to make everyone wear masks. Because a masquerade housewarming party makes perfect sense to Sheree. 

Bethenny is on a lot of whatever stimulating product she ingests.

Andy asks Jeff a speed round about the new baby, Monroe.  Gage changes most of the diapers. Monroe is going to call Zoila grandma. Awwwwww. Gage is best at getting her to stop crying, he’s a helicopter dad. They are not ready for another child. Andy asks if he is glad he did it. He says yes but if you would have asked him a couple of months ago he would have said no, but they are at the good stuff now. Side note: she’s just over five months.

Bethenny also had a speed round. The first thing she bought with the money from her old apartment was another apartment. Carol is a full on cat lady. Bethenny says that Ramona telling Dorinda she enjoys hanging out with John now was total bullshit. She says it is understandable that Dorinda doesn’t want to utter Sonjas name in a conversation. Bethenny believes that Ramona called Tom’s exes for dirt on Tom because “she’s very bored.” Apparently so was Bethenny last year when she had someone tail Tom to the bar and then called the bartenders to get all the sordid details of his actions.

We seem to have a kinder, gentler Jeff tonight. I blame Monroe for this.

Before the show there was a premier party for RHONY Jeff went, but Bethenny stayed home to make cupcakes with Brynn. She says the rumor that she didn’t go because of Jill was false, she just wasn’t interested in going.Do we believe that?  Jeff said Tom was very nice. He said Ramona was bitching about the alcohol situation. She threw a fit and left. He didn’t get a chance to talk to Sonja or Tinsley. I pause to see if Page Six has anything about Ramona’s tantrum. Not yet. But she was on a podcast recently trashing Jill Zarin because that never gets old. And they claim that Kelly Bensimon was asked back and declined the offer. I don’t think Kelly would turn it down. She literally does nothing but travel and post in tiny bikinis on the Internet these days. Carole cut her hair. Bethenny says Carole got her haircut. So basically she got Luann’s haircut.

Someone asks about Ramona’s new face and Jeff and Bethenny both just kind of blew off the question.

Bethenny is asked if she will ever be friends with Luann. She says she likes Luann. (cough bullshit cough) she says every time they take two steps forward they take several steps back like they did this week when she was promoting the show. Bethenny says Luann is very happy with Tom and she likes seeing her happy. Jeff thinks Bethenny did the right thing by telling Luann about Tom kissing another woman.

Next, it’s a sneak peek at Luann confronting Sonja for putting negative things about her and Tom in the press. She was directly quoted. Sonja basically says Tom is cheating on her and she doesn’t trust him. She’s unapologetic. Luann says that Sonja wanted to be with Tom and maybe she feels like she missed the yacht. The photo below sums up a lot of people’s opinion about this season of RHONY.

They did the poll about Tom cheating that you can see above.

Jeff is asked if he was stranded on an island which one housewife would he bring, Basically lists his favorite housewives, Kyle, Shannon, Tamra, Lisa Vanderpump and some old ones, Dina Manzo, Kim Zolciak and Ramona just for the hell of it. I will never understand how he is friends with Shannon Beador. He adds Nene and Cynthia as afterthoughts.

Jeff talks about Jenni’s pregnancy and says she’s doing great, she’s at seven months. He says that Kim Zolciak has actually been his biggest support with the baby. He said she was constantly on the phone with him giving him great advice and talking him off the ledge. She sent him tons of products. She was amazing. Jeff gives the impression that the whole baby thing isn’t as great as he thought it would be. Maybe he has postpartum depression. 🙂

Bethenny is asks other than her own, whose tagline she likes the most and the least. She likes Ramona’s the most and Luann’s  the least.

Jeff said he’d like to see Jill Zarin back on the show. Andy says that Alex McCord is going to be on the show with Ramona in a couple of weeks. He says she is a therapist. I hope when she gets there she will put that rumor to rest. She got a degree in psychology or something. She is not a practicing therapist. That said, I’m looking forward to seeing her.

I was told to watch the after show where Jeff goes in on someone, so I’m going to give it a quick watch.

Brianna’s husband Ryan from RHOOC calls in. He is still stationed in Oklahoma “waiting for his medical discharge” how long has that been going on? Is that marriage over? His question is also about marriage and when Jeff is going to marry Gage. Jeff says it will happen eventually. I’m not so sure about that.

Bethenny says her dating life has hit a dry spell. Hmmm what happened to the married guy? Her driver is in the audience and Andy didn’t believe Bethenny so he had to vouch for her. Bethenny basically says that her driver is the one that knows everything about her. I get that. But it’s still kind of sad. Andy says there are more rich guys with private planes falling all over Bethenny than any woman he knows. Bethenny says it’s true but she just needs a break from all of that to focus on her kid.

Bethenny says her relationship with Sonja is good this year. Andy talks about the Mexico trip where they get really drunk and something happens. I am pretty sure the makeout sesh was on the teaser reel so I am not sure why he is being so secretive.

Jeff Lewis hates Heather Dubrow and is thrilled she is not coming back to RHOOC. Jeff believes that Jax was having sex with his Florida sugar daddy back in the day. Because, duh. Jeff admits that he at times avoids his parental responsibilities and Gage catches him doing it.