#Catfish: Mecca & Tanner

I really need this episode tonight to blow off some steam after a long, long day of really bad weather. I’m starting to wonder why we haven’t been to meet a catfish at a park next to a large body of water. It’s like they don’t understand that the reason to watch the show is for the ridiculously hilarious cookie cutter production.

How long is Nev going to be on paternity leave? Oh wait! iO is filling in for Nev. I love her. She’s one of those gay chicks that make straightish chicks feel some kinda way. This will work. Nev skypes in and holds the baby up like a football, probably damaging her neck for all eternity.

Mecca is an 18-year-old who has been dealing with an Internet guy for FIVE YEARS. Who the hell lets their 13-year-old have contact with strange males on the Internet? His name is Ryan. So why is the title Mecca & Tanner. After “months of dating” aka text with an unknown stranger, she was able to convince him to video chat. Well that’s good news. Except it was dark in the room and he had a hoodie on. Okay that is ridiculous. And this went on for five years? WTF? So Ryan eventually tells her he’s been catfishing her and he is not the guy in the photos. His real name is Tanner. She thinks she has seen his real photos. So she was catfished and decides to continue communicating with her catfish and wait for it….he’s her first love. First loves seem to be the theme for this season already. Is the theory that to be this dumb in 2017 you have to be barely legal?

What, has iO always been a he? No, apparently iO decided to choose the male pronouns, or none at all last year. iO is 32. Whatevs.

Moving on. I am not happy with these barely adult shows. The whole point of these shows is to make fun of how dumb these people are it’s no fun if they are 18 and still supposed to be this dumb. Anyway, Mecca’s mama got the same couch the three assholes got last episode only an even larger version. Everyone sits on it and goes through the same dumb story again. So I remember to look at the walls. For some reason they did the weird paler version of the lime green we first saw at Danny’s house. But on the other wall they did the most hideous blue color they could find. You might think that all shades of blue are pretty, but you have not seen this one. Meanwhile Mecca is rambling on about Ryan having a sudden rash of dead bodies on his end of the cell phone and she thought that was sort of a red flag. Yet, she just went with it.

The move to another room where someone has learned that red is a very hard color to paint with. There she shows the boy in a photo kissing and actual catfish. Again, she overlooks this. Tanner, who is supposedly a red blooded American teen has no social media.  So they look at Ryan’s and find that he has joined an LGBTQ chat group. Guess who is a member of the LGBTQ support group as well? Did you guess Mecca? Because she sure didn’t. Apparently her true love is using her photo to catfish gay girls in the chat room. Wait, he did that four years ago because she gave him her Facebook password.

We conveniently find out that Tanner is most likely a girl named Taylor who is trans. How convenient that iO is on this episode. #eyeroll  They go to download Mecca on their findings at her parents food truck. They all plan to go to Texas tomorrow. Even Mecca’s mom. Max sets up a call with Tanner who doesn’t answer but instead calls back on Facetime. This is a Catfish first. We are going to see the catfish before we get there. Or not Tanner is wearing the hoodie, or a Darth Vader cape. He says he is not a girl. iO says that the person on the phone was female for sure.

Mom hangs back while Mecca goes to confront Tanner. When they get to Tanner’s house he is too afraid to come out. But Max coaxes him out. But it’s not Tanner at all, it’s Taylor the girl who initially introduced her to “Ryan” five years ago. So she is gay and in love with Mecca. Mecca needs some space. They leave and plan to meet again the next day. But on the way back Tanya calls and says she needs to come clean about something else.

Taylor said she lied about her friends dying from suicide. Mecca is super pissed about that.Finally a park near a large body of water! Actually, this is the second one of the show, I think the food truck in Tampa was parked at the first one. Mecca decides to back off the Taylor situation. They had zero contact since they met. Mecca is still open to being her friend in the future. They were unable to get in touch with Taylor. That seems like a really bad sign.