Here at the ghetto shack lights are flickering, we have high winds, huge hail and lightning. It seems to be sort of going around my actual shack by a few blocks so I think I will likely live long enough to finish this recap as long as a tree doesn’t fall on me.
So on RHOBH, we are back on the junk and Erika is still going in hard on Dorit on behalf of Rinna. Erika has been holding in a full steam of disdain for Dorit all season and this is the time she’s chosen to release it. Dorit does a really good job of fighting back saying that Erika isn’t nice and is totally stoic so why would she want confirmation from her. Then Erika busts out with, do you really think I would like you after what you did with the underwear? Rinna has kick backed to relax and enjoy the fight. Revisit #pantygate and then Rinna jumps in to hold Dorit’s feet to the fire. Erika tells Dorit that the whole pantygate thing hurt her feelings. Dorit questions whether Erika has feelings. Rinna jumps on that comment and of course, Dorit said it was a joke. Look, I like jokes, I like laughing. I do not like joke and laughing when my feelings are hurt or I’m frightened. Jokes in these sorts of situations are never funny.
Dorit defends PK for gawking at Erika’ puss. This sets off Eileen and Rinna and allows Erika time to gulp her cocktail. This will be important later. Dorit claims that it was Eileen and Rinna who made a big deal over panty gate. I’m ready for them to move to the dinner table. LVP is ready to pretend to care about Dorit because she’s barely had any camera time. The others shut her down. Kyle knows to keep her mouth shut. LVP does have a point. Everyone seemed fine with the panty idea until Erika got upset.
The junk docks, it’s a gorgeous junk with beautiful red sails. Erika gets up to get off the boat and LVP of all people goes to comfort her. Erika is highly emotional. I have a really good idea why, which I will share with you in a moment. Kyle tries her hand at stopping the massive tears streaming down Erika’s face. It’s heartbreaking.
We briefly break into a group of three, Dorit, LVP and Kyle and the other four. The four are in a van, and the threesome is walking the streets of Hong Kong. Dorit is trashing Erika still. She says she pays people to be around her and tell her she is fabulous and it’s gotten to her head. I’d like to hit Dorit over the head with and old dirty shoe. The threesome magically finds the Chanel store. Funny that happened. Eileen and Erika cuddle on the sofa back on the couch at the hotel. Rinna and Eden are there too. Everyone goes to bed. I could have sworn that the dinner where Erika loses it happens in that same jacket.
I behind so I’m using that as an excuse to fast forward though the Dorit phone call to PK. Everyone meets up at breakfast to get ready to go see Big Buddha. Dorit balks at the 245 steps they must climb on their journey. In Rinna’s talking head, she says, “Dorit is being a downer, like this one.” and holds up a black pill from her pill bag. #funny
To get to Big Buddha they have to take a really fast, super high, ski lift sort of gondola with a glass bottom. That would probably freak me out. It’s freaking out Dorit and Kyle and LVP wants to try to rock their compartment to scare them more. The foursome in the other cart all have their phone out and are video the whole thing while remarking on how cool the experience is.
The higher they go, the more rain the seem to encounter. Is Buddha crying because the housewives are there? LOL Eileen just said “Clearly this is Buddha’s revenge on a bunch of angry, stupid chicks invading Hong Kong.” #greatminds LVP spots one of the sacred oxen and falls in love. Wondering what those giant yellow things are Rinna and Eileen are wielding? They are giant incense sticks they burned for blessings. For a brief moment they all burn incense and stare zenfully at the Buddha in the distance. They all climb the massive, massive, massive amount of stairs to get up to the Buddha and they are all overcome by the size and serenity of the largest Buddha in the world. They all snapped photos and posted on Instagram. I grabbed the one above from one of them.
Next we are in the hotel with Dorit and her makeup artist Carlene who she brought with her. WTF? She thinks she has something in common with Erika now. Everyone gets dressed to the nines and they head out to a fabulous restaurant right on the harbor. It’s stunning. The seating is two benches facing each other. Erika is on one side on one end and Dorit is on the same side on the other end. Eden says, “I feel like there is an elephant at the table.” Rinna asks Dorit if she apologized to Erika. Bravo provided some really good hairdressers for the glamsquadless guests. LVP has a very high top bun that is AH MAZING. It’s really a sight to behold. And here we go.
Erika tells Rinna she hasn’t apologized. LVP says that pantygate was no big deal and that it doesn’t warrant all drama. She said it much more kindly than that and Erika jumped on her for minimizing her feelings. Rinna points out that if Dorit trusted PK she would not be so threatened by Erika. Kyle tries to tell Rinna it’s not wise to bring PK into it, after all she doesn’t like people inquiring about Harry. Erika goes off on Kyle saying Dorit shouldn’t talk about someone’s wife like that! Erika gets loud saying, “Why are we giving all of this deference to PK and none to me?!!” Erika says she had to explain the situation to Tom because Dorit and PK made it seem like she was attempting to entice him.
Erika is starting to come unglued. Dorit now understands that the situation being twisted and getting back to her husband could be upsetting to Erika. Dorit is being very sincere, and Erika is being very snappy. She says that if Dorit wants to make it right she can apologize to her husband. Dorit seems fine with this solution until she adds that PK needs to apologize to her husband too. Andy says that PK takes a lot of shit at the reunion, and now I am hoping that it is Tom that doles it out. I love Tom.
Despite Dorit finally having a breakthrough, Rinna, who is probably overserved and underfed, keeps screaming Dorit’s name out and giving her directives. Rinna, sweetie, this is not about you. Shut up! OMG! Rinna just took a big bite of food! Now if she would just chew it, maybe Dorit and Erika could work it out. Now here it comes. Eileen tries to mediate. She tells Erika that Dorit didn’t seem to be doing what she did maliciously. She didn’t understand the gravity of her prank. Eileen asks what Erika can do to fix things. Erika says there is nothing.
And then Eileen says, “But she didn’t kill your child.”
Erika loses her shit at Eileen. She started off very calmly. Then she says don’t ever bring up killing my child again because my child could get killed. LVP defends Eileen (!) trying to explain to Erika that she just meant that it wasn’t such a huge thing. Eileen says that she didn’t mean it that way.
Erika’s blood starts to boil. She says in a very measured voice, “Eileen, your kid doesn’t put on a uniform every night and put his life on the line for people he doesn’t know. Don’t every talk about my kid again.” Everyone keeps telling Erika that she wasn’t talking about her kid and she didn’t mean anything by what she said, but Erika is too far gone to hear it. Then she looks at Eileen and says, “SHUT THE FUCK UP”
Kyle looks terrified. Rinna gets up to comfort Erika who becomes hysterical and says, ” You don’t know what I deal with every night. That’s really insensitive. Your kid’s not out there.” Erica lets out a fuck you or two and sobs into her napkin.
And here is the important part. Erika says “I’m not going to tolerate this shit out of any of you, especially in this climate. And I don’t bring it up because he’s and adult and that’s his choice, don’t ever fucking criticize that. Now Eileen is crying.
Rinna says to Dorit, “I have to change the subject for a minute.” I have no idea what she is about to say but I do know why Rinna is doing it. She’s trying to get the camera off Erika and Eileen. Not for her camera time but to give them a break. And so she says, “Remember when I was at your dinner party, why did everyone get rounded up to go get “touched up” and leave me alone at the dinner table?” At first I think she is just pointing out her poor hostess skills but then Kyle gives her a leg up asking what she is insinuating. Rinna looks at Dorit and says, “Where people doing coke in your bathroom?”
Kyle and LVP are FURIOUS with Rinna. Dorit is also furious and denies the accusation. Tacky? Sure but the diversion tactic worked, and more importantly Rinna is ALWAYS right about these sorts of allegations. You may not like her but she’s right. And probably pissed she wasn’t invited.
Okay here’s what I think is going on with Erika. This was filmed the very last day of September and the first day or two of October. In August the massacre of the Dallas Police happened, followed by the same thing in Baton Rouge. Cops everywhere were answering false alarms to lure them to a location to shoot them. It was a very scary time for the family of LEO. I think Erika was terrified and very stressed. I think she was drunk a lot in Hong Kong and most of the people at that dinner were drinking heavily as well. I honestly think it was just the climate of the country at that time.
Next week: The coke accusations continue. Everyone returns to Beverly Hills and so we get stuck with another Dorit and PK scene. Eileen and Erika FINALLY film their scene for Y & R and LVP has a very fancy party outdoors.