I haven’t seen Vanderpump Rules yet, but here is the link to Lady C’s recap. So I am going to hit this show with a broad brush. Schwartz’ mom is in the audience and some website posted all of her financial business today which I found to be pretty unnecessary. I guess the long time speculation that Schwartz is a trust fund baby was wrong. She wasn’t really forthcoming one way or another about the Katie situation.
Sandoval was asked to give advice to the other couples. Schwartz and Katie could benefit from therapy. Kristen’s boyfriend needs to be present with the guys and not text Kristen their entire conversations when they hang out. Sandoval says that Kristen’s therapy has done wonders for her and he and Ariana are getting along fine with her.
Next week, the girls, led by Kristen, tell Schwartz that the root of Katie’s issues are some girl he slept with in Vegas. Um, are we sure it was a girl? Do they have him confused with Jax? The scene takes place with Schwartz in full on drag. He announces he is not going to marry Katie.
The polls were pretty dramatic. In a “Who’s you rather?” Schwartz beat out Sandoval 78% to 22%! Are you surprised it was that big of a win? I think it was those stupid white pieces he has been sporting in his hair lately. They seem to be gone now, and he looks much better.
Schwartz swear up and down that married life is fantastic and Katie is a fantastic wife, full of inner light. Yes, he did say that.
The guys won’t give any info away on Scheana’s latest conquest. I’m assuming he is deaf.
A caller asks Schwartz is he is embarrassed for Katie for the way she has acted this season. He says she has to take some responsibility for that but again, she’s come a long way, inner peace, love and light, blah, blah, blah.
Since the guys are away from their Valentines, this year, Andy makes them kiss. Again. Then they play a drinking game. Should have done that the other way around. The Toms played the game in high heels. Sandoval in particular was very good walking in heels.
Someone asked why Scheana isn’t speaking to Jax. Sandoval says that Tequila Katie is not the only rage texter out there. Jax does it to. He sent Scheana some really vicious texts recently. The Toms are sure they will make up soon.
Someone asks Sandoval who does his braids and how we can get him to stop doing it. Amen. I forgot to mention he has a French braid on the top of his head. There may still be white stuff in it too. I am trying not to look too hard. He also sprays his head with deodorant if he is going to be wearing a beanie because his head sweats.
The VanderToms immediately went out to hit the bars and the selfies with random chicks got posted. When I went to pull a photo, the second one came up. The Toms were in NYC without their female sidekicks last year for Valentines Day too! Again, on WWHL with a free hotel and plane ticket from Bravo. That must be the life.