I am hoping we get to spend a lot of time in Mykonos tonight, but according to the TV guide, we are going to have to endure more speculation about Kim’s lack of sobriety. Here is my real time coverage of Mykonos.
Erika and Kyle are preparing for the big show. Erika is the headliner and her performance starts at 3 a.m. It’s an all night rager. Kyle talks about working on her show about her life. Kyle says it is bringing back a lot of memories. I love Kyle’s turquoise ring.
Erika’s stage literally hangs off a cliff. She has to climb up a series of ladders in custom Chanel boots to get to it. It looks terrifying! It’s super windy. Down below, there is an ocean of hot topless gay men who have been partying since it got dark. They are totally packed in like sardines in a roll top tin. Erika rocks a full set singing, Pretty Mess, Painkiller and XXpensive. It goes off without a hitch. The crowd goes wild!
By the time they get back to the house, the sun is rising and Erika sees great lighting for a photo shoot. Erika drags Kyle into the photo shoot.
Eileen and Rina
Eileen and Rinna love to rollerblade. Dorit was invited to join them despite the fact that Dorit has never skated. The skating attempt lasts all of five minutes until they have a seat on the grass to talk about PK’s party. Dorit tells Rinna that Kim Richards was invited. Why the hell is Kim invited other than to have a pot stirring storyline about her? Kyle is not even in the country. No one else cares for Kim. This seems like a terrible set up.
Eden has been invited to tea with the Queen of Villa Rosa. Eden has just broken up with her boyfriend. It appears that he quit smoking at her insistence and instead was weaning off using nicotine mints. So they went to dinner, and she seemed appalled that he was eating a cheeseburger. Then after dinner he had a mint. This was totally unacceptable to her. He was grabbing for the mints the way he grabbed for a cigarette previously. LVP has no idea how to respond to this ridiculous story other than to say, “Oh, look! Ponies!” Even though Eden was likable enough at first, she seems to actually be quite and odd bird.
The talk about Kim a bit. LVP seems to be back on the Kim train where she has some compassion for her. Isn’t this a complete 360 from their relationship the last time Kim was on the show? The more Eden talks, the more LVP disagrees with Eden. Eden has summed up Kim and Kyle’s relationship after meeting them once. LVP tries to explain that Kyle is not an enabler, but Eden seems to know way more about the situation than the people who actually know Kyle.
Rinna hangs out with Eden at her place and Dorit shows up. Eden makes them green smoothies. It’s 8 pm and the Rinna and Dorit are wishing for booze. Rinna makes a joke about putting a Xanax in her smoothie. She whips out a huge ziplock full of all sorts of vitamins that are just thrown in loose, like a sack of medicinal trail mix. Rinna knows what they all are and what they do. It doesn’t seem right to have them all loose and rubbing up against each other.
I do not care about this event. At least Boy George will perform. Other than that, these phonies are annoying as hell.
When Erika arrives at the party in a beautiful black dress, Dorit’s first comment to her is that she looks much better than she did in the T-Shirt dress. Rinna arrives in a conservative white dressy shorts suit trimmed in black. She invites Rinna to her BBQ where HarryHamlin will be grilling. Erika is not sure she can trust that causal BBQ attire will be worn by everyone.
This is the second party these posers have had in their short-term rental. I suppose they should make the best of it while they can. Kim Richards arrives in a very um, feisty mood sporting a fake British accent. Rinna and Kim greet each other warmly with a hug. Kim is talking a lot. Kim says that the birth of her grandson is starting to make her a bit anxious like she was when she first had babies. Eden makes a huge deal of that. Eden also has a neck tattoo.
Dorit reads some sappy birthday wishes off of a piece of paper. When the curtain is pulled back and Boy George is there, Rinna is super excited. Boy George sings Karma Chameleon and everyone loves it. Eden ducks out right after but not before kissing LVP and Erika on the lips. LVP feels like she is being unfaithful to Kyle, the heretofore only female she kisses on the lips. Then Eden double kisses Camille, Kim and Kyle on the way out. Camille tells Kyle and Kim that Eden is so nice. They both react with stank faces. Kim tells Camille about Eden’s constant judgments and projections toward her about basically everything she says.
Dorit tells the story of Rinna and her bag of pills to Boy George and LVP. Boy George wanders off halfway through uninterested so LVP is stuck as the captive audience. Dorit says the bag of pills was funny and LVP doesn’t get the humor. Perhaps because it is not British humor. Dorit tells LVP to pull the pole out of her ass, it was mostly vitamins and it was funny!
So the conversation with LVP and Dorit appears to be taking place in Dorit’s dining room as I see a long table and chairs. So why in the bloody hell is there AstroTurf on the wall? Perhaps it is an exterior dining area. But again, why is there AstroTurf on the wall?
Next Week: Rinna hosts a BBQ, Erika films for Y&R, and Kyle hosts a Great Gatsby Party.