Tamara Tattles

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You are here: Home / Entertainment News / Daily Tea: (Open Forum)

Daily Tea: (Open Forum)

November 17, 2016 by tamaratattles 304 Comments

daily-tea-talk-amongst-yourselves

 

The Daily Tea was originally an open forum for off topic chatter where we could support each other when needed or just share our daily lives in order to avoid talking about such vital topics as cat videos and colonoscopies in the on topic posts.

It was a place where if you didn’t have a kind response, you simply didn’t respond at all. Sometimes I would share something going on with me as a jump off topic, but any topic from favorite recipes to your kids’ successes was welcomed. Β Some weeks this site would move faster than others and people simply could not fathom that that week’s post was still there and the off topic chatter would invade the regular posts. Β I’ve offered links and suggested bookmarks, pointed out that I have a search box conveniently located in the right hand side bar where a simple “Daily Tea” search would lead you to the most recent open forums. But clearly that was too much work.

The good news is, I expect this forum to be on the front page for quite some time. So talk amongst yourselves. I won’t be following along. So email me if something that needs to be moderated is posted.

I’ve officially got nothing to say this week.

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Filed Under: Entertainment News Tagged With: Daily Tea

About tamaratattles

Come for the tea. Stay for the shade. Not for the easily offended. You're a special snowflake just like everyone else.

Comments

  1. Kate Gates says

    November 17, 2016 at 7:37 pm

    I’m trying to do the 95 Books challenge. Last three I read was ‘The Unbearable Lightness of Being’ ‘The Secret History’ ‘The Rosie Project’ which was No. 80. All amazing addictive reads. any suggestions for good addictive books to get me over the line by Christmas? I have 15 to go! (Sorry, my isn’t that exciting) πŸ™‚

    Reply
    • WhyOWhy says

      November 17, 2016 at 7:44 pm

      I need to know more about this challenge, please!!

      Reply
      • WhyOWhy says

        November 17, 2016 at 7:50 pm

        Also, I don’t know how fast you read, but Queen of the Night by Alexander Chee was amazing! It’s around 500 pages, so pretty long, but the imagery and story and beautiful.

        Reply
      • Kate Gates says

        November 17, 2016 at 8:14 pm

        Basically in 2008 an author (or aspiring one) read that George Bush Jr had read 95 books that year. Feeling strongly that as a writer, he shouldn’t have read less books than the former president, he and his friends started a challenge. You can find the challenge on line but I don’t think links are in the rules SO basically it’s a challenge that’s gone a bit vital to read more than 95Books and see how many you can read in a year πŸ™‚ Thanks for the tip! I just need 14 more πŸ™‚

        Reply
      • WhyOWhy says

        November 17, 2016 at 8:16 pm

        Thanks!! I’m going to have to look it up. I challenged myself to read 50 books this year (goodreads) and am almost done. I’m at 44 with 6 weeks to go.

        Reply
        • Kate Gates says

          November 17, 2016 at 8:46 pm

          Nice one!!! To get you over the line, If you haven’t read them, here’s some suggestions for books that stood out to me this year:

          Special Topics in Calamity Physics
          The Secret History
          The Rosey Project + sequal
          Sula
          Slaughter House Five
          The Life of Pie
          Great Gatsby
          Haroun and the Sea of Stories

          Reply
          • WhyOWhy says

            November 18, 2016 at 12:18 pm

            Thanks, Kate… I’m going to add those (except Gatsby, since I’ve read it a multiple times) to my reading list.

            Reply
          • SaraSally says

            November 19, 2016 at 8:46 am

            For her birthday, I bought my kid Kurt Vonnegut’s multi story (6 in 1) book. I want her to hurry so I can read them again. My 40 yr old KV dust collectors are merelyy kept around only sneeze at.

            Reply
    • Erica says

      November 20, 2016 at 4:17 am

      Any of you peeps have suggestions for an October read for my bookclub? I missed the meeting where we divided up the leader duties. Not usually an issue – as a former English teacher, I can even sometimes come up with my own questions even if there isn’t a bookclub question list on the publisher website.

      But they gave me October. Those in the past have picked spooky, witchy, or scary stuff. Past stuff has included classics like Frankenstein (glad I read it) Rebecca, Heart Shaped Box, and some other stuff like Dracula and . (Some I didn’t read). My favorite was when someone picked Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone. This was right around the time Azkaban was released, and I fell in love with the series (still obsessed 16 years later)

      I hate horror. It sticks with me too much. I hate dystopia shit too – I read Lord of the Flies in high school, had bad dreams for weeks about Piggy’s death, and nearly had a complete meltdown when it was suggested by the English department that I teach it. (I won that fight… )

      I’ve had a few personal experiences, so I believe in spirit/ghost visitation/afterlife.

      So, are there anything you guys can suggest for me to have as my pick? I wish we HADN’T already read Harry Potter, cause that would be my pic. A thoughtful story about signs from loved ones from the afterlife would be ok too. Even Stephen King would be ok (although I think some of my bookclub peeps would object, they can suck it), if it was more his thoughtful stuff. I couldn’t handle Cujo – I don’t want to dream of my cat or my folks’ dog eating my face or something.

      We read non-fiction too, if that helps.

      Reply
      • Whyowhy says

        November 20, 2016 at 4:23 am

        My book club has recently done Middlesex, The Night Circus, One Hundred Years of solitude, a local authors murder mystery called One Murder More.

        My friend and I just started an Agatha Christie book club and are starting with the Priorot (sp?) books.

        I loved The Queen of the Night. It’s a beautifully written book about an opera singer who is trying to find out who wrote an opera about her life.

        Reply
        • Erica says

          November 21, 2016 at 4:56 am

          WOW.. my previous response apparently didn’t post. going to look up some Agatha and Queen of the Night. I can’t remember if we read Middlesex for Book Club, or if I read it by myself (years ago – all I remember is I liked it)

          KaterineNola – ANN RICE! Never thought of her! I’ve read her erotica, but not her vampire stuff. Will look into that.

          Reply
          • Sharon says

            November 26, 2016 at 9:34 pm

            Erica- also try reading the Mayfair Witches series by Anne Rice : The Witching Hour, Lasher and Taltos. I loved this series even more than her Vampire Lestat series which I read around 15 years ago. Some characters from Lestat carry over to the Mayfair Witches including the “Talamasca” which is secret group that chronicles and guards secrets of the supernatural world.

            Reply
            • Erica says

              November 26, 2016 at 10:09 pm

              Oh…. so The Witching Hour, would it stand by itself if you had no prior experience with her work?

      • KatherineNola says

        November 21, 2016 at 2:14 am

        What about any options from Ann Rice? Thank you for your list! I love to read.

        Reply
        • Calipatti says

          November 23, 2016 at 1:09 am

          Ann Rice’s books can be rather adventurous for some readers.
          I picked one up at used book store without checking it out and it was erotica from cover to cover.
          I don’t know how I know that. ?

          Reply
          • KatherineNola says

            November 23, 2016 at 10:26 am

            LMAO, yes I forgot to mention she does an erotica series! You always crack me up!

            Reply
          • Erica says

            November 26, 2016 at 10:10 pm

            Best part of that is GARRY MARSHALL made one into a movie, and it started ROSIE O’DONNELL. LOL!!!

            Reply
  2. PeachyKeen says

    November 17, 2016 at 7:41 pm

    I appreciate the open forum.. Looking for suggestions for a different dessert for T Day?

    Reply
    • WhyOWhy says

      November 17, 2016 at 7:47 pm

      I’m in charge of dessert for all holidays and after no one ate the pumpkin pie I made last year, I’m not making it this year. So my family will be pumpkin pieless. Instead, I’m making a berry pie and probably some decorated sugar cookies. I’m also trying my hand at making dinner rolls (not dessert).

      Reply
      • Minky says

        November 17, 2016 at 8:16 pm

        Perhaps pumpkin lattes, hot or iced? I’m not crazy about the Starbucks version, but my DIY iced pumpkin latte is pretty good. Creamy, sweet, and heavy on the whipped cream. If you just want to have something pumpkin flavored for T-Day, but don’t want to fool with a pie, it’s delicious.

        Reply
      • Wonky Tonk says

        November 17, 2016 at 9:10 pm

        What?!!!! Pumpkin pie is a little like pizza in that even if it’s bad it’s still pizza/pumpkin pie. You should consider calling a family meeting and expressing your concerns about their ‘taste’ level, or just bake a cobbler it’s all good, your choice.

        Reply
      • Wonky Tonk says

        November 17, 2016 at 9:16 pm

        Minky posts deliciously fantastic sounding stuff and makes you beg for the recipe, but I’m not gonna do it this time though, no ma’am. I still haven’t tried her cookie recipe, but it sounds so good. On Minky’s theme, and following-up with mine… A pumpkin cobbler on the theory that less is more. And you know WhyOWhy the more I consider a pumpkin cobbler the more I know I would eat it gleefully.

        Reply
        • Minky says

          November 18, 2016 at 1:47 am

          Hahahahahaha!!!! I kinda like it when you beg, pumpkin. ?

          Re: Pumpkin Pies. Like, seriously. Who doesn’t like pumpkin pie? Store bough, homemade, or whatevs. It’s soooooo good!

          Reply
          • fivecatsownme says

            November 18, 2016 at 9:51 am

            Pumpkin pie is okay, but I make a Dutch apple pie with raisins soaked in Jack Daniel’s, and a black bottom pie. This year we are having BBQ brisket and sausage.

            Reply
            • KatherineNola says

              November 23, 2016 at 10:28 am

              That sounds so yummy! Can I come
              To
              Your house? I’m
              I’m Austin!

          • Beignet says

            November 18, 2016 at 12:22 pm

            Minky: I make this: Pumpkin Pecan Pie.. A taste of both.. Delicious!
            Pumpkin Pecan Pie

            Pumpkin Layer
            1 egg, lightly beaten
            1 cup Packed Pumpkin
            1/3 cup granulated sugar
            1 t pumpkin pie spice
            1 unbaked pie shell

            Pecan Layer
            2/3 cup light corn syrup
            2 eggs, lightly beaten
            Β½ cup granulated sugar
            3 T butter or margarine, melted
            Β½ t vanilla extract
            1 cup pecan halves

            For Pumpkin Layer:
            Combine egg, pumpkin, sugar and pie spice in medium bowl.

            Spread over bottom of pie shell.

            For Pecan Layer:
            Combine corn syrup, eggs, sugar, butter and vanilla in same bowl; stir in pecans.

            Spoon over pumpkin layer.

            Bake in preheated 350 degree oven for 50/60 minutes or until filling is set (usually longer).

            Cool on wire rack.

            Reply
          • Minky says

            November 19, 2016 at 6:21 pm

            Goodness! That sounds delicious. With a name like Beignet it’s kind of to be expected that you’re a good cook.

            Reply
            • Beignet says

              November 20, 2016 at 8:56 am

              LOL! I grew up in New Orleans surrounded by fantastic food and fantastic cooks! (BTW…My dog’s name is Beignet…) πŸ˜‰

      • PiaPill says

        November 17, 2016 at 10:40 pm

        WhyOWhy,
        I vote for you giving them a pumpkin (literally) set in a beautiful pie dish! Put that puppy right smack dab in the middle of the table as the centerpiece and see if anyone notices! ?

        Reply
        • Whyowhy says

          November 17, 2016 at 10:41 pm

          Okay, that make me lol!

          Reply
          • PiaPill says

            November 17, 2016 at 10:54 pm

            WhyOWhy,

            Great; mission accomplished!

            Reply
        • KatherineNola says

          November 23, 2016 at 10:30 am

          You nailed it!

          Reply
      • justanothermary says

        November 18, 2016 at 9:43 am

        My daughter-in-law makes a pumpkin cheese cake is to die for. I think that may the food item I will miss the most this year.

        Reply
        • Matzah60 says

          November 18, 2016 at 12:54 pm

          The first major holiday after divorce/separation is the hardest. Go to the movies. Buy a big bag of popcorn and a diet coke and enjoy! I know some people won’t venture out doing things alone, but I love going to the movies by myself. I love going with family and friends as well, but do prefer going myself. It’s entertaining and is a fun escape from reality!!

          My kids used to spend Thanksgiving with their dad until they got older. I have a sister who lives around two miles from me. This only happened because my ex and her husband were in practice together, past tense. I spent the first Thanksgiving with my sister and family, but then I started taking a train to NY and treated myself to a broadway show buying a ticket at the TKTS for half price. Returned to my home via Amtrak the same day. Too expensive to stay in a hotel for the night, but still a splurge and a GOOD day for me! A new tradition to replace old, past memories.

          Reply
        • Sliceo'pie says

          November 18, 2016 at 5:42 pm

          Hard time for me too Mary-first holiday without my husband. It’s painful. I believe better times are ahead. Thinking of you.

          Reply
          • SaraSally says

            November 19, 2016 at 9:16 am

            If you are lonely on Thanksgiving, in Normal, IL, and would enjoy company & not bothered by moaning, groaning, bitching, & laughter …your welcome to come by. We’ve all had difficult holidays in our life & totally get it.

            Reply
      • SaraSally says

        November 19, 2016 at 9:04 am

        Folks are coming by aft tgiving dinner for hot buttered rum & a dessert share. People show up with some wonderful sweets. Bought some italian style crunchy ladyfingers for a steal last month. The day before, I’ll make a trifle with strawberry, blueberry & raspberry.
        I’ve never really learned to make pies so I leave that to friends & the bakery. I do like to buy Pepperidge farm streusal cups, bake them, & fill them with lemon merengue & toasted coconut. We never have any left over when served. We bought a smoked free range turkey that we’ll serve cold. I’m really trying to minimize last minute baking this year. I would like to find a new decent ( rich=calories! πŸ™‚ mashed potato recipe. The search is on. Saw a recipe on TV that included crm cheese & garlic that can be made days ahead. Anyway, its shopping hell for me today!

        Reply
    • Kate Gates says

      November 17, 2016 at 8:15 pm

      What’s your usual desserts? I can then advise alternatives πŸ™‚

      Reply
      • PeachyKeen says

        November 17, 2016 at 8:18 pm

        Boring pumpkin and apple pie. I am diabetic.. but .. I cook for others. Thanks for suggestions.

        Reply
        • Kate Gates says

          November 17, 2016 at 8:38 pm

          Oh! My brother is a type one diabetic and I’ve got coeliac disease. I’ve grown up with meals that accomodate everyone’s needs.

          Some good ones with slow acting carbohydrates:

          – baked cranberry cheese cake
          – broiled rhubarb (chopped rhubarb in a pan with water and sprinkling of brown sugar) with a scoop of creme fraiche per serve
          – cheese platter with figs and honey
          – truffle
          – Pavolova with raspberries
          – ginger snap cookies
          – chocolate coated honeycomb

          If baking from scratch, you can enter ingredients into my fitness pal and work out portion sizes. We do that for my bro so it doesn’t mess with his sugars πŸ™‚

          Reply
          • Minky says

            November 18, 2016 at 2:13 am

            I want to eat every item on that list. Mmmmmm mmmm.

            It also just made me think of something: How about a pumpkin mousse?! Or a pumpkin flan?

            You could probably find a good recipe online and it too can be altered to accommodate various dietary restrictions. Like lo-carb, gluten free, dairy-free, etc.

            Reply
            • Kate Gates says

              November 18, 2016 at 12:12 pm

              Pumpkin mousse??? Tell me more of this magical ideal!!!

            • Minky says

              November 18, 2016 at 4:28 pm

              There is an absolutely darling lady who does keto diet recipe videos names Kristie. She’s speaks with a gorgeous Southern drawl from North Carolina. She’s awesome and she’s got great low fat high carb diet recipes for a bunch of stuff. One is a pumpkin cheese cake that I really want to try.

              Also, pumpkin mousse recipes are pretty easy to find. And as I said, you can tailor the recipe or find one to fit any plan that you’re doing. If you want low carb, no sugar, grain free, vegan, etc., just substitute out ingredients. Pumpkin is obviously the most important ingredient. If you can’t do eggs, don’t use them. If you don’t do dairy, you can substitute canned coconut cream or use dairy free whipped topping like Cool Whip. No sugar? No problem! Use stevia or xylitol instead.

            • Kate Gates says

              November 20, 2016 at 12:54 am

              Thank you very much! I live in AUS and am just learning about all the pumpkin possibilities! (Pumpkin based desserts arent that big here)

            • Minky says

              November 18, 2016 at 4:33 pm

              Whoops! Kristie does low carb HIGH fat recipes, aka Keto.

            • Jrleaguer says

              November 18, 2016 at 11:12 pm

              That confused me for a second. πŸ™‚

          • Matzah60 says

            November 18, 2016 at 12:43 pm

            Awesome info, Kate Gates. My phone has a fitness app that I use when riding my bike or power walking in the morning, but nothing comparable to ‘my fitness pal’ which provides portion control. I am going to google it now. Thanks!

            Would also love the recipe for baked cranberry cheese cake. Sounds sensational!

            Reply
            • Kate Gates says

              November 20, 2016 at 12:57 am

              Jamie Oliver has a brilliant one with easily substitutes for varying diet needs. He’s my go to for everything. While you are there, try his brownie recipe. It’s LIFE changing! πŸ™‚

            • Matzah60 says

              November 20, 2016 at 10:53 am

              @Kate Gates, Thanks very much for all this info. I really appreciate it!!

    • WhyOWhy says

      November 17, 2016 at 8:22 pm

      Try a crumble or a trifle. Those aren’t traditional, but easy to make. You could also do a tart or some kind of cake / cupcake.

      Reply
      • PeachyKeen says

        November 17, 2016 at 8:25 pm

        Thanks.. A great suggestion. Happy holidays

        Reply
      • Lawstangel says

        November 18, 2016 at 2:24 pm

        Trifle is awesome! I have a killer peach trifle recipe! Traditional English Trifle is good as well!

        Reply
    • Theresa says

      November 17, 2016 at 8:32 pm

      Publix, our local grocery, has a really beautiful and yummy looking cranberry custard pie recipe on their page. We are trying it this year.

      Reply
    • WhyOWhy says

      November 18, 2016 at 12:17 pm

      Honestly, I am not a fan of pumpkin anything. So us not having a pumpkin pie isn’t the end of the world for me. The only one in my family who eats it is my 94-year-old grandmother, so my mom said she’s just buy her a personal-sized one from the bakery.

      What about a spiced pear pie? It’s pretty much an apple pie, but add in cloves for the spice.

      Reply
  3. loriflack says

    November 17, 2016 at 7:42 pm

    I went to the Richard Nixon Library in Yorba Linda. It is very impressive.

    Reply
  4. WhyOWhy says

    November 17, 2016 at 7:42 pm

    OMG, thank you so much for posting this now! I have been waiting for this particular post all week!

    I’ve had an awful week — Okay, in the grand scheme of things, it’s not that bad, it’s just stupid and annoying.

    I wore two different shoes to work on Monday. How did I do that, you ask? I have two pair of flats, back and navy blue. Not the same shoe in different colors, just two pair of flats. I was running behind and just put my feet in the shoes that were in the pile next to my chairdrobe (chair covered in clothes). When I got to work, I was going up the elevator and looked down and noticed I had one black flat and one navy flat on. Luckily, I had a pair for shoes under my desk. They didn’t totally match my outfit, but at least I wasn’t walking around in two different shoes all day.

    There has been massive amounts of traffic both to and from work all week and I don’t know where it’s coming from. I haven’t left any earlier or later, but it took me 45 minutes to go the 9 miles from home to work the other day.

    I bought the wrong light bulbs for the bathroom at Target.

    I spilled my Starbucks getting out of the car.

    Work is becoming increasingly sucky. The security officer took away all key card access to anyone who doesn’t work in particular units or divisions. Which makes it difficult for me to do my job because we have public counters where I know have to wait until someone can open the door for me in order to go talk to the people I need to talk to. I asked for access to the divisions I most interact with, but was denied. Oh, and my supervisor keeps giving me more projects, but won’t promote me until we can prove I’m working out my my classification, but when I provide her with a list of everything I do, she tells me it’s not out of class… I’m just doing the work of two people with my classification. This is why I’m trying to find a new job!!!

    I blame all of this on the Super Moon.

    Reply
    • WhyOWhy says

      November 17, 2016 at 7:54 pm

      Please disregard all my typos.

      Also, I didn’t buy light bulbs for Target’s bathroom. I bought the bulbs for my bathroom at Target.

      See what I mean about this week? LOL

      Reply
    • PeachyKeen says

      November 17, 2016 at 7:55 pm

      WHy: Love the comments.. glad I am not only only that has bad days.. Had a lady tell me shirt was mis buttoned. It was. I laughed. Before the change in daylight savings times..

      Reply
      • WhyOWhy says

        November 17, 2016 at 7:59 pm

        I was once told by a woman that my sweater was on inside out. I was in line at Starbucks. LOL. I was mortified, but thankful the woman told me.

        Reply
    • Kate Gates says

      November 17, 2016 at 8:26 pm

      1. The super moon was an extreme let down and I feel strongly messed with everyone’s emotions without delivering the magical goods!

      2. That’s so upsetting regarding shoes!!! I’ve been there and had to run a conference in them all day and just pray everyone was too busy to notice. Since that day I’ve put the shoes i plan to wear the next day, by the door and just run out with them. Minimises risk for this absent minded events planner.

      3. The security team sounds like they’re on a power trip. You’ll likely need a collection of signatures on a letter of complaint regarding the reduction in productivity.

      4. I’m not sure how you feel about the word so I’ll say Tuesday instead. Your boss sounds like a Tuesday. I bet one of two things are happening. She’s either getting you to do her work and that she’s claiming to do OR she’s taking advantage of your need to pay bills and won’t ever give you a promotion. Both are a form of bullying. Keep a diary of what she does each day for back up with HR and I hate to say it but seriously consider looking for another job. She’s not likely going to help you or treat you in accordance of your rights as an employee. Well that’s my suggestion. Shitty people rarely break their patterns of being shitty.

      5. Sorry for the numbered list! I’ve got a horrible memory and this pattern helps me address all points!!

      Reply
      • WhyOWhy says

        November 18, 2016 at 12:23 pm

        It’s super annoying, Kate. I’m not even asking for a large promotion… just one to the next level up with includes a 5-7% raise.

        What really annoys me is that they keep hiring more people to the position I’m asking to be promoted to, but the person doesn’t do the job because they are just put in the position because it’s open… they are really an “advisor” to the big boss.

        Reply
        • Kate Gates says

          November 20, 2016 at 12:59 am

          I would have go insane. Good on you for hanging in there WhyOhWhy!!! Your boss sounds like a power tripping asshole. Hope you get a better space soon!!

          Reply
    • Jaded says

      November 17, 2016 at 8:57 pm

      Gee! Sorry for you. Things can only get better. Hugs!

      Reply
    • Wonky Tonk says

      November 17, 2016 at 9:43 pm

      So for the next few weeks maybe you have a hard time finding someone to allow you access to the spaces you need to interact with coworkers on the other side, and maybe that time starts to add up, and maybe your supervisor takes notice and broaches the subject with you, and maybe you say something like “I’m so sorry, I know, but for like the umpteenth time I went over there to get the Umptyfratz report from Suzzie Snizzlelark, like I do every third Thursday of the month, and I had to wait forever for access to the leggyworkwalkaton section of the building where she works. It was never like this before I wish we could go back to having access, this is really interrupting my work flow, for example it took so long getting the umptyfratz from Snizzlelark I couldn’t meet with Tittledore Winky for our weekly Thomturtle review, and you know how important that is to Pranklorin Neverwhatshisname, he’s fired people over less, and I really need this job” and for emphasis you should totally make sure your supervisor sees the level of distress you’re feeling as displayed all over your distraught face. Also share how distraught about your situation you are with similarly constricted coworkers and let them know you felt the need to speak with your supervisor about it and hopefully if enough do you’ll all gain access again which will improve your work output. Remember you’re not trying to start a worker revolt merely sharing your concerns about the obstruction to your productivity.

      Reply
      • Whyowhy says

        November 17, 2016 at 9:57 pm

        Lol! I love the names you came up with. If only that would work…

        Reply
  5. PeachyKeen says

    November 17, 2016 at 8:05 pm

    I needed a laughing moment this evening. Thanks.

    Reply
  6. T D says

    November 17, 2016 at 8:29 pm

    I needed a crying moment yesterday and today and again when I came home from work. That’s why I hang around, tea and empathy.

    Reply
  7. Happy gal says

    November 17, 2016 at 8:34 pm

    I have a had a bad week . I have come to the conclusion that many women in animal rescue for whatever reason are extremely mean and vindinctive . It is almost as if they volunteer their time knowing no matter how bad their behavior most organizations will not fire them. The vast majority have enormous egos and need constant stroking which gets annoying and creates another set of problems.

    Fund raisers for the rescues think they cannot be questioned and that makes it a bigger mess. I will only volunteer w rescues that have pleasant attitudes are in it for the animals and still remember people count too and yet I somehow still manage to get entangled with this shit drama giving me a migraine all week

    Reply
    • Kate Gates says

      November 17, 2016 at 8:53 pm

      I spent 10 years working in events for not for profits and I just wanted to say that your feelings are valid. There’s a certain breed of asshole that feels they can be atrocious because they feel immunity working for these causes and trust me it’s everywhere. I had a boss once that made us re hire a photographer and stage a place for her to have her photo taken because she didn’t feel there were enough photos of her taken at the event the day before. I chose to leave the field but for those who stay, I applaud you. Just remember, you’re there for the goal, not for their ego. Their egos are just things you need to side step to stay on path. I used to take mental health laps around the park to calm down after dealing with a charity monster. It helped a lot!

      Reply
      • Happy gal says

        November 18, 2016 at 9:24 am

        Damn what is wrong w people !!!

        Reply
    • Lindsay says

      November 17, 2016 at 9:40 pm

      You are spot on re: ppl knowing that they can’t get canned from a volunteer position. It always denigrates into some insane pissing contest.

      Reply
    • WhyOWhy says

      November 18, 2016 at 12:24 pm

      That’s pretty much all volunteer organizations. It’s super annoying and the reason I stopped being as involved in one of the groups I belong to.

      Reply
      • Minky says

        November 18, 2016 at 7:14 pm

        Oh Jesus! I hear all of you regarding this issue. Volunteer workers can get a bit too too sometimes. There are many people who volunteer for the right reasons, and they’re amazing people. But, oh boy, the ones who are there for the wrong reasons specialize in spoiling it for everybody else.

        Reply
  8. Justjenn says

    November 17, 2016 at 8:40 pm

    An early Daily Tea! I have been so tired out I can barely stay awake for the nightly news. Between my new job starting an hour earlier, the sun setting at 4:30 pm, and this half cold that people keep passing around i am so looking forward to a three day week next week. Anyone have any big holiday plans?

    Reply
    • WhyOWhy says

      November 18, 2016 at 12:26 pm

      I feel you, Jenn. I get home from work and it’s dark out, so I just want to go to bed. It’s a fight every night to stay up until 9pm.

      I took next Wednesday off to bake for Tgiving. We’ll be at my mom’s for Thursday, and then on Black Friday, my mom and I head to San Francisco for the weekend to shop, hang out and play tourist.

      Reply
      • JustJenn says

        November 18, 2016 at 6:57 pm

        That sounds like a nice week! Are you actually braving the crowds on Black Friday?

        Reply
        • WhyOWhy says

          November 18, 2016 at 7:07 pm

          Yes. The crowds in San Francisco are crazy! That’s partly why we stay for the weekend. So we can spread the shopping out a bit.

          Reply
  9. shay says

    November 17, 2016 at 9:58 pm

    DO YOU GUYS UNDERSTAND WHAT SHE SAID? This will stay on the front page because she won’t be posting. At all. Get it? And she’s not moderating because she’s not reading the comments here.. or maybe anywhere.

    STAY WOKE.

    Reply
    • A/K/A Sam says

      November 18, 2016 at 10:45 am

      I know you are coming from a good place but I don’t think we should be trying to be “woke” about Tamara’s comment. She shares a lot of personal stories and information about herself and it is up to her to decide what she wants being out for discussion.
      I’m guilty of thinking of TT as a good friend because of this site, but keep in mind there are many people who are reading, lurking, in the WLS etc who are not personal friends and who don’t need to know her business. Please respect her privacy.

      And to everyone who is having a rough week…I there too, sending out lots of good thoughts to y’all and appreciate you sharing. I get a lift coming here and seeing everyone pulling together, and think of the commenters as friends too. Now about my Thanksgiving dinner invite πŸ˜‰ LOL

      Reply
    • loriflack says

      November 18, 2016 at 1:43 pm

      CHILL.

      Reply
      • loriflack says

        November 18, 2016 at 1:45 pm

        @shay⬆️

        Reply
        • shay says

          November 18, 2016 at 7:19 pm

          Loriflack: I already admitted I lost my chill. So go fuck yourself.

          I don’t want TT to give up on us because some fucks make it not worth it. I know I am not one of those fucks so take your suggestions and have a seat.

          Reply
          • loriflack says

            November 19, 2016 at 5:15 pm

            feel better?

            Reply
            • T D says

              November 19, 2016 at 7:05 pm

              Do you? Shay is engaged in a serious battle and if it’s a fight you’re looking for best go and grab your flack jacket you’re gonna need one.

            • shay says

              November 19, 2016 at 10:52 pm

              TD, thank you for having my back. I wasnt sure if my brain was working or if I was reading something that wasn’t there. Thank you for making me feel less crazy and being so dope. Really appreciate you.

            • I.Just.Can't. says

              November 20, 2016 at 4:15 am

              Shay, I’ve got your back as well. If you read Loriflack’s other posts she is begging for some attention. Don’t waste your time or energy on this one.

              I swear, TT tries to let us be unsupervised and there will always be a handful that don’t play well with others.

            • I.Just.Can't. says

              November 20, 2016 at 4:18 am

              Ps- TD, you rock!

            • shay says

              November 20, 2016 at 4:34 am

              Thank you, I Just Cant.

              I just can’t trust myself during a hemorrhage and have lost lifelong friends by lashing out. (SWIDT?) Luckily the one person who I regretted pushing away reached out to me and I was able to explain what is happening without putting all the blame on it.

              I obviously have a vicious streak– I just don’t normally not know if I mean to say/do things I’m saying/doing. Its very hard not trusting your own thoughts. Or having to shut up mid-sentence because someone you know and trust tells you to walk away.

              Everything in me tells me just to make this one point… but my loved ones eyes says, “You’re out of your mind right now and you can’t unsay things. If you mean it, write it down and say it next month.”

            • Minky says

              November 20, 2016 at 4:41 am

              Aaaaaah! Lord almighty! Dafuq is going on here this weekend? I still blame that mutherfucking super moon. It’s been fucking up all my shit this past week.

              I love all the togetherness, though. So cool that we’ve all got each others’s backs. Don’t forget about my whoopin’ stick too. I have no issue if I have to brain a motherfucker who gets out of hand. ☺️

            • Minky says

              November 20, 2016 at 4:52 am

              @Shay I’m certainly not gonna claim that I can understand what you’re going through from a health stand point, but I can totally understand being fed up with the fuckery. I know your friends and family have your best interests at heart when they try to keep you in check. They’re your angels and they’re looking out for you.

              But, my god, sometimes the stupidity is just too fucking much. People open their obnoxious mouths and fucking just let ‘er rip. It’s like, “Really? Like, you think what you just said is totally okay? But I’m the one that needs to shut up? Alright. Well fuck it, then. Where’s my stick?”

              I’ve never really used my stick in real life, to beat a real person. Verbally, yes. Physically, no. But I like to know that it’s there. Just in case of shit.

            • shay says

              November 20, 2016 at 5:18 am

              Are you like Teddy Roosevelt?! Do you literally carry something?

              I get old people now. When your mind or body betrays you, and you can’t trust or help yourself– you don’t even know you need help? Its the most helpless feeling. It doesn’t matter how many graduate degrees you have or how you used to manage one of the biggest Midcap mutual funds. You can’t even remember spending 2 days with your friend from out of town last month. Just makes you wonder how you’ve embarassed yourself in a blackout.

            • Minky says

              November 20, 2016 at 5:44 am

              When I used to be a fitness freak I’d take very long 6-mile walks. I became paranoid about getting attacked by some rabies infected animal. Or a mugger! So, I started carrying a stick, just in case some shit went down. Nothing ever happened. But the stick made me feel a bit more safe.

              I’m less like T. Roosevelt and more like Yosemite Sam. Like in the Looney Toons cartoon where Bugs says: “I speak softly, but I carry a big sitck.” And then Yosemite says: “Oh yeah?! Well I speak LOUD and a carry a BIIIIIIGGER stick!!! And I use it too!”

  10. Heidi says

    November 17, 2016 at 10:15 pm

    Hope you are well Tamara.

    Didn’t she mention having some kind of surgery in the near future?

    Reply
    • shay says

      November 17, 2016 at 10:43 pm

      Heidi, I hope you’re right. May have jumps to conclusions. Whooops.
      So, about that apple cake…

      Reply
    • Marsha Marsha Marsha says

      November 17, 2016 at 11:03 pm

      I am sending Tamara my best wishes and prayers. I have been picking up subtleties in her writing that all is not well also.

      Reply
    • Minky says

      November 18, 2016 at 7:28 pm

      Holy shit!!! I’m as dense as a fucking brick! Now I’m scared. I hope TT’s okay.

      Reply
      • WhyOWhy says

        November 18, 2016 at 7:29 pm

        I’m sure she’s fine. Probably just needs a break. We all do sometimes.

        Reply
  11. loriflack says

    November 17, 2016 at 10:15 pm

    and…

    Reply
  12. T D says

    November 17, 2016 at 10:26 pm

    So many mouths and not enough spoons.

    Reply
    • I.Just.Can't. says

      November 20, 2016 at 4:19 am

      Best comment!

      Reply
  13. Margaret Shepard says

    November 17, 2016 at 10:53 pm

    I was a real ass to the woman in a mini-van at a drive through this week. I was suffering from a sinus infection but I yelled at her to move up, shot her the bird etc. Not proud of it but long story short, this classy woman bought my meal . I was ashamed of myself but I paid it forward and bought the meal for the person behind me. Morale of my story, try and behave my damn self. LOL.

    Reply
    • Psylocke says

      November 18, 2016 at 12:51 am

      O m g that is the most hilarious thing I’ve ever heard.

      Reply
    • Matzah60 says

      November 18, 2016 at 1:02 pm

      That’s a great story, Margaret Shepard!! Pay It Forward was a profoundly memorable movie for me and I believe it is a random act of kindness or gesture to another person who you probably don’t know. No ego involved. Not looking for a thank you, adulation, or acknowledgement. This woman in front of you did not retaliate, but figured you were having a bad day and decided to make it a little better. Love it! Love that you continued the gesture by paying for the person behind you!

      Reply
  14. Margaret Shepard says

    November 17, 2016 at 10:57 pm

    Also to remind myself of a saying I read recently, Be not inhospitable to strangers lest they be angels in disguise.

    Reply
    • Minky says

      November 18, 2016 at 1:41 am

      That’s a beautiful story. We all make mistakes and sometimes feel that the world is a hostile place. Surprises like the lady in front of you in the drive through are little blessings. It makes you smile.

      Reply
    • JennLovesAndy says

      November 18, 2016 at 11:23 am

      True words!

      Reply
      • WhyOWhy says

        November 18, 2016 at 12:28 pm

        I’ve had days like that, Margaret. I’m sorry.

        And that saying is spot on.

        Reply
    • SaraSally says

      November 19, 2016 at 9:37 am

      Be not forgetful to entertain strangers: for thereby some have entertained angels unawares. Hebrews 13:2

      Reply
  15. BeetsWhy says

    November 18, 2016 at 12:44 am

    I am so late to the game regarding books. I just, just, just finished “The Farm” by Tom Rob Smith. It is set in England and Sweden. A psychological mystery that is engaging throughout. I promise you won’t put it down!

    Reply
    • Kate Gates says

      November 18, 2016 at 12:15 pm

      Why thank you!!

      Reply
    • WhyOWhy says

      November 18, 2016 at 12:28 pm

      Thanks for the suggestion!

      Reply
  16. CoKatie says

    November 18, 2016 at 8:57 am

    Anyone else a little freaked out over this Dr (?) Phil interview with Shelley Duvall? It really disturbs me.

    Reply
    • justanothermary says

      November 18, 2016 at 9:47 am

      Ohhhhh – I haven’t seen it – spill!

      Reply
    • CupcakeScholar says

      November 18, 2016 at 9:57 am

      CoKatie, I am soooo uncomfortable about this show airing! Was the end goal to entertain or to empower and help? This should not have aired. I hope Ms. Duvall is receiving the help she needs.

      Reply
      • justanothermary says

        November 18, 2016 at 9:59 am

        I’m at work so I can’t watch – what’s going on? I’ve always liked Shelley Duvall.

        Reply
      • joanne says

        November 18, 2016 at 1:40 pm

        After I post this comment, I’m going to Dr. Phil’s website and express my outrage. I’ve only seen the preview, but this exploitation of Ms. Duvall represents an all time low for Dr. Phil. I’ve witnessed his descent, particularly in recent years, from an affable good ole boy to a carnival barker, hocking his wife’s beauty creams and promoting his investments, ‘Drs. on Demand’, and the various ‘treatment’ programs he obviously receives kickbacks from. I have found his demeanor confrontational, bordering on cruelty, but his obsession with his ‘celebrity friends’ is a conceit I cannot stomach.
        Ms. Duvall was a wonderful talent who is clearly seriously disturbed. Putting her on a television show (with millions of viewers worldwide), whether he gets her help or not, is solely motivated by his quest for ratings.. He doesn’t give a shit about her, she’s merely the most provocative sideshow he could find this month. He has no regard for the likelihood that if she gets well, this humiliation he is subjecting her to could have far reaching repercussions for her future personal and professional life.
        Dr. Phil is a low-life dog.

        Reply
    • WhyOWhy says

      November 18, 2016 at 12:30 pm

      I heard about it yesterday. I’m intrigued, but saddened by how ill she seems to be. I want to watch, but I really think Dr. Phil only had ratings in his mind. If he really wanted to help her, he would do it off camera. I don’t want to condone ratings grabs like that.

      Reply
      • Joanplus2dogs says

        November 18, 2016 at 6:21 pm

        I did watch it. They did send her to a treatment center but she stayed only 3 days since she refused to take any meds. She is now being treated in her hometown but still no meds. The show is supposed to be assisting her family. It seemed to me she also has issues with ageing & menopause in addition to mental. Hopefully someone can break thru to her & get her on the meds & testing she needs.

        Reply
        • Whyowhy says

          November 20, 2016 at 2:49 am

          This is so sad. I hope the treatment works for her.

          Reply
    • spk says

      November 18, 2016 at 1:23 pm

      Yes, a little freaked out and will not watch it! Only heard about it via the headlines but I kinda love Shelley Duvall and don’t want her embarrassed. From all accounts, she’s so mentally fragile, how could she give consent to this public shaming. Then the other camp thinks it’s good to talk openly about mental illness and discuss what it “looks like”. I’m all for that but don’t want her trotted out — I hate it. Damn dr phil.

      Reply
    • Cat says

      November 19, 2016 at 8:55 am

      I watched it. And hate myself for doing so. He accomplished nothing, other than exploiting someone’s pain for ratings.

      Reply
      • justanothermary says

        November 19, 2016 at 9:28 am

        I wound up taping it and watching it. I wish I hadn’t.

        Reply
        • Minky says

          November 20, 2016 at 2:59 am

          I read about this interview. Dr. Phil is going the way of Andy/Bravo. Shelly Duvall deserves a lot better than that. The Shining my favorite movie ever. I could dedicate my life to analyzing it and every other Kubrick film. Duvall’s talent is amazing. Her face is a work of art. What demon signed her up for Dr. Phil? It’s all so wrong.

          Reply
          • Whyowhy says

            November 20, 2016 at 3:03 am

            Minky, this is why we get along… The shining is also my all time favorite movie.

            I think that’s a great comparison about Andy/Dr. Phil. I was actually just watching Jimmy Fallon and Megyn Kelly was on it talking about her new book. She needs tinned how the title came from something Dr. Phil said years ago and all I could think of was “yeah, before he was such a hack.”

            Reply
            • Minky says

              November 20, 2016 at 3:14 am

              I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve watched “Shining”. And every time I do I see more stuff. Kubrick was a genius. And he sure did know how to pick good actors for his films. The Shining would not be the same without Duvall. Nobody else could play Wendy Torrance the way she did. She does such an amazing job of playing the country bumpkin, clueless wife, married to an abusive jerk. Duvall makes the Wendy character so endearing and lovable from the first moment you see her on the screen.

              I’m getting into “Full Metal Jacket” now too. I’ve only watched it about 5 times though.

            • Whyowhy says

              November 20, 2016 at 3:18 am

              No one will watch it with me anymore. Because I recite every line. I actally loathe the Wendy character in the movie. Probably because Duvall did such a great job. I find the Wendy character in the book is much less annoying.

            • shay says

              November 20, 2016 at 3:48 am

              I hate being scared.

            • Minky says

              November 20, 2016 at 3:48 am

              One of my favorite Wendy lines: “You did this to him. You son of a bitch!!!”

              I have a hard time picking my favorite part of that movie. It’s all so good. Next time you watch it, pay attention to the sound. Kubrick is really artfully sneaky with the sound. The first half of the movie is hard to hear, and then the next half just gets louder and louder and louder. By the time you realize how loud it’s gotten it’s too late and the shit’s hittin’ the fan every which-a-way,and you’re scrambling to find the remote to turn it down. And I LOVE the score in the beginning with the aerial views of the mountains. SO GOOD!

              Also notice how Kubrick divides the movie into toughly two parts. The first part is very slow paced, and seemingly uneventful. The second part is demarcated by Danny going upstairs to get his fire engine (hint, hint: fire engines are for emergencies). Danny’s wearing a Mickey Mouse sweater, which features Mickey kicking a football. I think that’s Kubrick’s way of telling the audience: “THIS here is the kick-off. Shit’s about to happen.”

          • Erica says

            November 20, 2016 at 4:40 am

            Please don’t compare Andy to Dr. Phil, or Kubrick for that matter. Dr. Phil is supposedly an educated professional who should DEFINITELY know better. I think it is telling that Oprah doesn’t promote him that much anymore (other than reruns on the O Network, which does struggle. ) His ass certainly wasn’t involved on her Choose Your Live tour. She never even mentioned him – and I should know, I attended one of the weekends (and would pay to go again if she created another one)

            Read up on what Kubrick did to Ms. Duvall to get such reactions from her – if anything, he might have hastened any and all of her mental health issues. I didn’t watch Dr. Phil, so I have no idea of her timeline. But some of those scenes where she appears to be emotionally tortured? Those weren’t Wendy… those were Shelly.

            Andy has never professed to be anything but pop culture. Or really smart. I’ve read his books. Also, I think he’s been somewhat kind (albeit misguided) when it comes to really fucked up people like Kim, or Sonja or all of the New Jersey nutjobs.. Especially with Kim, we know there is footage that has never been aired. Or at least was aired years later.

            Reply
            • Minky says

              November 20, 2016 at 5:25 am

              Oh, I know about all of that. I’ve done a bit of reading about The Shining, and I’ve watched the behind-the-scenes documentary a couple of times as well. You can find it online pretty easily.

              The thing is, the documentary is kind of part of the film. It’s DVD commentary before it’s time. Because it’s more or less part of the movie, that makes it hard to tell whether or not Kubrick himself is putting on a show for the camera, which is being operated by his daughter. Meaning that maybe Kubrick is acting too. Vivienne Kubrick has expressed her distaste for the Pr. Phil interview. And I believe that blaming Duvall’s current state on having worked on one movie, with one director, 37 years ago, is a bit of a stretch.

              And I sure as fuck wasn’t comparing Kubrick to Andy. Kubrick was an artist and a genius. Andy is something else entirely. And Andy/Bravo knows very, very well where entertainment ends and liability begins. He exploits mental illness all the time. All he cares about is making money and not getting sued.

              Dr. Phil, on the other hand, whether he should know better or not as a “professional”, has got me all fucked up with the Shelly Duvall exploitation. That was unnecessary and cruel. Fuck him.

            • Erica says

              November 21, 2016 at 5:20 am

              actually, you were the one who brought Andy into the convo. Shelly Duvall has been diagnosed with mental illness – don’t know of anyone other than Kim who has been diagnosed by a professional that is on the Real Housewives, or Top Chef, or any of the other shows Andy has produced. Kim is an addict, but frankly, I think Andy has treated her with kid gloves. CERTAINLY better than Kubrick treated Duvall.

            • Minky says

              November 21, 2016 at 5:36 am

              I don’t get what you’re saying here. I was comparing Dr. Phil to Andy because I think they both exploit people. I think Dr. Phil is an ass, just like I think Andy is an ass. Fuck the both of them. And then I expressly said I would never compare Kubrick to Andy. And that I don’t believe Duvall’s problems have much to do with her work with Kubrick. What did I miss?

    • Katherine 2.0 says

      November 19, 2016 at 4:58 pm

      Dr. Phil is like clickbait for TV. He is a repulsive example of what’s wrong with that culture. Fast, easy cheap thrills so that he can line his pockets. My heart breaks for poor Shelly Duvall.

      Reply
    • Calipatti says

      November 23, 2016 at 1:29 am

      No I wasn’t “freaked out’. Shelley Duvall had been living like this for years.
      Yes I would had preferred Dr. Phil quietly helping her but it’s not the way he works with adults.
      Briefly he said he shows these messy people so others can benefit. So many suffer from similar problems.

      As to her famous friends now complaining about Dr. Phil, I say where have you been?

      I’m a nobody yet I knew she was in that town wandering around. Those so called friends did nothing for her but complain how Dr. Phil was helping her today.

      I’m not defending Dr. Phil, this is about Shelley. At least with this being public others can now help her.
      That how I see it.

      Reply
      • Cheryl B. says

        November 23, 2016 at 8:56 am

        After the debacle on here shooing me away, I think I may be able to consider,some commentators still say things I came here for in the first place. Thanks.

        Reply
  17. Margaret Shepard says

    November 18, 2016 at 9:51 am

    So true Minky, so true!

    Reply
  18. justanothermary says

    November 18, 2016 at 9:58 am

    Does anyone have a suggestion on how to stay sane while alone for the holidays? All my friends, of course, have plans and I have no family. I checked all the local papers and there really isn’t much going on that would appeal to just me. I even checked out a couple of the local churches but they have had their volunteers lined up far in advance for their soup kitchens and other events. I thought about driving up to the city and getting a hotel room and goofing off but I’m afraid that with all the holiday decorations, a hotel room alone seems pretty pathetic. This is my first year alone so it’s going to be tough. Thanks for any suggestions anyone may have.

    Reply
    • CupcakeScholar says

      November 18, 2016 at 10:40 am

      Your first mind was to get the hotel room in the city and goof off….Do it!!! Depending on your budget, order room service or take-out or if you are in a Residence Inn situation, cook wrong stuff like popcorn, cookies, and grilled cheese. Stock up on snacks and binge watch as much crap on Netflix as you can before you have to return to the real world.

      Only leave the room to do something indulgent like a mani-pedi, massage, or to restock your junk food stash.

      No *$#@*&% holiday movies! My personal favorites: House of Cards; Black Mirror; The Office; Parks and Recreation; and Lots of Stand-up like Louis C. K., Tig Notaro, and Chris Rock.

      Screw the pressure to be social and jovial during this time of year. Use the time to treat yourself and plan for the new year.

      Reply
      • Matzah60 says

        November 18, 2016 at 1:07 pm

        Yes to everything Cupcakescholar said!! I wrote something under a post of yours, justanothermary but towards the beginning of the comments. Don’t try to be social and jovial. Do something for yourself. Cupcakescholar gave you great advice!!!

        Reply
        • I.Just.Can't. says

          November 18, 2016 at 1:13 pm

          Yes! Agree! Weote a long reply to you Mary but for some reason is in moderation, sooo… take care of you!

          Reply
    • I.Just.Can't. says

      November 18, 2016 at 11:16 am

      Mary, I have been alone several holidays. The first one I had a pity party… took benadryl to try to sleep through it. By the next time, I decided it was a time for ME, which was a foreign concept to me. I have done the hotel thing, netflix binge, which are all fine. It’s YOUR time, so it might take you some time to figure out what you really WANT to do with your time. My ritual ended up being ordering way too much chinese food (they’re always open on our holidays), then hit the sales & shop alone. But, sometimes, changing your surroundings is good, like the hotel thing. My suggestion is to give yourself some options & figure out what mood you’re in before you decide. Holding up shut in & not bathing, having room service/delivery is actually therapeutic in my experience. Lots of people are alone, not just you. Keep that in mind, and it won’t feel so “pathetic”. I know it is hard at first. My heart goes out to you. Once you survive the first one, and start looking at it as YOUR time, you might find yourself actually looking forward to the self-indulgence and freedom it can bring. Also, if your friends are all doing their thing, if you were to share your situation & your feelings about it, you might score an invite to their gatherings. I’ve done that before as well, but just know they may eat weird shit you don’t like. Lol! Xoxo

      Reply
    • JennLovesAndy says

      November 18, 2016 at 11:21 am

      Awe if you are in S. Texas, you can join us! Tough situation being alone the first time at the holidays. I lost my mother as a teen around this time and so they have always depressed me. I go through all the motions but you still can’t help feeling down. I like your hotel idea! Do something you always wanted to do. I have learned to always depend on myself because I have always disappointed in others. Much easier this way! Plus me power!! Hope it all works out for you.

      Reply
    • WhyOWhy says

      November 18, 2016 at 12:33 pm

      Take the time to do the things YOU want to do. Go to a nice restaurant and indulge in a meal you normally wouldn’t have. Order fancy room service. Go explore the city. Make new holiday traditions!

      And if you need to talk, we are all here. =)

      Reply
    • spk says

      November 18, 2016 at 1:44 pm

      JustAnotherMary – I too am alone most holidays for different reasons and sometimes it’s cathartic, sometimes it just sucks. Your ideas all sound awesome to me and the hotel room doesn’t actually sound bad–it’s only bad if you hang out in it the entire time and never step foot in the city. If you do go to the city, I vote you do something that is utterly outside your usual comfort zone. Not that will put you in danger! But something that will get your brain going afterwards.

      This might sound totally weird but I find myself watching really horrid stuff. For some reason it’s really entertaining and feels like I’m getting away with something. One year I binged on True Blood episodes. Another time I ended up watching Taxi Driver.

      But I don’t skimp on the food and always make my favorites! There is something to be said for making your own traditions. It’s hard, I know. I’ll set a place for you at my table and hope you are keeping a smile in your heart!!

      Reply
    • Lawstangel says

      November 18, 2016 at 2:18 pm

      I’ve done a couple of holidays alone in the past…my choice. I am surprised there is no volunteer work. I live in Los Angeles, they always have a super big dinner downtown at the Union Rescue Mission and they always welcome volunteers, even on “the day of” it really puts things in perspective, I realized that no matter what I had going on, there were people far worse off than me. Anyway…. The better movies of the year start rolling out at Thanksgiving, maybe get that hotel room see a couple of movies, then do dinner in the hotel restaurant, where there will surely be others who are out of town as well. Then go Black Friday shopping which seems to start on Thursday anyway. Don’t think pathetic, think empowerment, you are doing what you want to do, not what is required of you….Whatever it is have fun! But don’t be surprised if it elicits some strong emotions, sometimes that happens, just let it roll out! Then continue on!

      Reply
      • justanothermary says

        November 18, 2016 at 3:56 pm

        Thanks all for the suggestions. I just got a call from a mission that is downtown Minneapolis and they will take all the help I can give. They’ll even let me cook, which is a huge passion of mine. I’ve done a lot of catering in the past so I’m very familiar with cooking for 200 to 300. I’ve booked a room in a beautiful hotel right downtown and I’m going to be ok! Thank you all.

        Reply
        • Sliceo'pie says

          November 18, 2016 at 5:53 pm

          That’s so wonderful Mary-I’m really proud of you and truly inspired by how you pushed yourself. It would have been much easier to sit home .I think this will be rewarding- hope you have a good time. I think those people are so lucky to get you. You go girl!

          Reply
        • Cat says

          November 19, 2016 at 9:02 am

          Yay!

          Reply
        • Erica says

          November 20, 2016 at 4:42 am

          Mary – you are FUCKING AWESOME. If you are staying longer than Friday ight. I hope the hotel has a great spa so you can get yourself a mani-pedi. Or whatever relaxes you best.

          Reply
        • Matzah60 says

          November 21, 2016 at 9:40 am

          I think you picked a great way to celebrate Thanksgiving. I don’t do much cooking these days with my kids grown and out of the house, but I do like doing volunteer work for causes near and dear to my heart. On Christmas each year, I go to a homeless shelter in DC where I found my mother after two years of searching for. She has passed now, but was schizophrenic and generally unwilling to accept help and often refused to take her meds. I didn’t recognize her when I found her. Her hair was white, down to her waist, though the woman who ran the shelter really took such good care of her. She would braid her long hair that she used to wear short.

          Anyway, I was so touched by this woman’s commitment and compassion for the women in the shelter. My mother moved back in with me in my home and lived quite happily for another 10 years. My mom was always grateful to this woman and we would make as large a contribution as we could each year at Christmas time. My mom couldn’t bear to go back there as it was probably the lowest time in her life. She asked me to return there before she passed away to help on holidays when I didn’t have my kids with me. I made a promise and continue to go there every Christmas.

          Moral of the story is that I probably got so much more out of it then I gave to these women at the shelter. My mom used to say this quote to us when we were kids. I am sure it is familiar to most of you.

          “β€œI cried because I had no shoes until I met a man who had no feet”
          ~Helen Keller

          It is a good quote to remember for me and reminds me not to feel sorry for myself when the going gets tough. Others have it worse and struggle much more than I do. Always be grateful for all you have.

          Have a great Thanksgiving, justanothermary! You are doing a wonderful thing for people who are not only alone at Thanksgiving, but homeless as well. Like you said, “You’reoing to be okay!” So glad to hear you say that.

          Reply
    • shay says

      November 18, 2016 at 6:05 pm

      Mary, my husband left me for another woman and spent all our savings. I moved from San Diego to Seattle, and the day before Thanksgiving he shut off my phone, credit cards, insurance, etc. against the financial restraining order. I spent Thanksgiving, Christmas Eve and Christmas alone. It was the worst. I tried to kill myself. Don’t be alone.

      Just watching families on tv and holiday movies can make you so depressed and feel even more alone. You have to invite yourself to a friend, coworkers, or something, if possible.

      If not, go to the food bank. Go to a soup kitchen and wash dishes. Call around to churches to see who is cooking for and feeding the homeless downtown. Volunteer at a pet shelter, just petting animals or mucking cages. Or choose your own adventure.

      You can spend days before the holiday gathering supplies to make care bags (plastic bags for rain!) with whatever you can afford… Granola bars, pair of tube socks, white Ts, juice boxes or bottled water, cup of noodles, lipbalm, soap, tampons, PB&Js, a banana, and an encouraging note. And then hand them out on T-Day and Xmas. Lots of people are alone and you will feel better not sitting home crying over your own circumstances, but actually doing something to make someone else’s holiday less lonely or less hungry or less wet.

      Even 20 sandwiches and socks will make you feel so good. If you ask grocery stores, 99 cent stores, or target for expired, returned, or close to sell-by items, they will often donate them to your mission.

      Good luck. Life is suffering. The way we lessen our suffering is by making those around us suffer less. It will come back to you ten-fold. Report back!

      Reply
      • justanothermary says

        November 19, 2016 at 9:33 am

        Thank you for the suggestion. I am going to make up care packages in the lonely evenings for the rest of the week – until I leave for Minneapolis. I have spent a lot of evenings crying and Christmas movies are everywhere. I’m touched by how caring people have bee to me. I’ll keep you all posted.

        Reply
    • Cat says

      November 19, 2016 at 9:01 am

      My favorite thing for Christmas alone is watching White Christmas a gazillion times while eating icky chocolate covered cherries. And singing all the songs. Loudly.

      But that’s just me. πŸ™‚

      The important thing is to do whatever makes you happy.

      Reply
      • justanothermary says

        November 19, 2016 at 9:35 am

        When I was a kid I loved White Christmas. We lived in LA and I was on Romper Room and did some commercials and some stuff for Disney. Whenever we were on the lots someone would mistake my Dad for Danny Kay and often asked for his autograph, especially when he was in his navy uniform. I was always so proud of him.

        Reply
        • Lawstangel says

          November 22, 2016 at 2:28 pm

          OMG…loved Romper Room!

          Reply
      • spk says

        November 19, 2016 at 1:57 pm

        That is hands down a favorite movie to sing and tipty tap along to all the songs. I love Danny Kaye. One time I was on a plane during the holidays and we hit awful turbulence over the mountain pass. My seat mate turned kind of green and I offered to hold her hand but she said maybe we could sing to distract her. I couldn’t believe it when I started with Sisters, Sisters, she knew the words! We sang the entire song, total strangers.

        Reply
      • belladonna says

        November 20, 2016 at 8:07 am

        My favorite is A Christmas Story with Ralphie. You’ll shoot your eye out.

        Reply
    • KatherineNola says

      November 23, 2016 at 10:43 am

      I have been there many times. Someone above mentioned a
      Movie. I have. Done that and really enjoyed it. -also, ontzvt. Homeless
      Shelter, taLlk to the head and ask to
      Volunteer-it works Nd is rewarding
      .
      My
      FVorite is go
      To the city. And get a hotel!

      Reply
  19. fivecatsownme says

    November 18, 2016 at 10:02 am

    My house is a mess and I don’t know where to start. I married a pack rat, and when ever I get sick enough to go to the hospital (usually happens once a year) he pulls all his shit out of the garage and starts looking through it. He is like the Borg and has assimilated the family room, the guest room, his side of the bedroom, the living room. He won’t throw stuff away. Then he had the gaul to ask me to get rid of some of my books! I quit cleaning, except for things that need to preserve hygiene like kitchen bathroom and change the sheets. I am tempted to move all his shit in the back yard, set it on fire and invite the neighbors for a cookout.

    Reply
    • spk says

      November 18, 2016 at 1:51 pm

      Well as you know the only way to kill off the Borg is to infect them so maybe giving up on the hygiene efforts will do the trick πŸ˜‰

      Reply
    • EnglishRose says

      November 18, 2016 at 9:03 pm

      Hysterical, fivecatsownme!! Thanks for the laugh. The Borg reference had me ROTFLMAO. Where’s Jean Luc Picard when you need him?!! By the way, the backyard bonfire sounds like the perfect solution to your problem. Your wonderful sense of humor is obviously what saves you from killing or severely mutilating him, so keep it up!

      Reply
    • iloveearlgrey says

      November 25, 2016 at 11:06 pm

      LMAO! This is the best post ever, Fivecatsownme!

      Reply
  20. Margaret Shepard says

    November 18, 2016 at 11:41 am

    Justanothermary, I hear you about this time of year. All the shows and commercials show household of families celebrating together. It can be so depressing if that’s not the case for yourself. We have a feed the hungry program here in Atlanta from Porsha Williams late grandfather Hosea Williams. People volunteer to feed the homeless, and fill other needs. They give out clothing etc. Never known Porsha to participate but she certainly should. Maybe she was late on getting her tickets on the underground railroad. Sorry could not resist. Mary your idea of a hotel room and room svs. sounds good. I have been where you are and its not easy. Wishing you all the best.

    Reply
  21. WhyOWhy says

    November 18, 2016 at 7:32 pm

    YOU GUYS!!! I’m just catching up on last week’s Daily Tea topic and THANKN YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU for all the book suggestions!!!

    Also, MINKY!!! That’s great news and I am so happy for you.

    (Sorry I’m late to the game, but the last couple weeks of work took A LOT out of me.)

    Reply
    • Minky says

      November 19, 2016 at 6:24 pm

      Thanks WhyOWhy. My palms are beginning to sweat less and less now. Haha!

      Reply
      • Whyowhy says

        November 20, 2016 at 2:52 am

        Lol! Glad they are getting back to normal. Health is no joke and I’m glad you are okay.

        Reply
  22. EnglishRose says

    November 18, 2016 at 9:06 pm

    Tamara, this open forum is a wonderful idea – so glad you thought of it. In looking through all the comments, there are a lot of your fans who have things they need to get off their chests, or just commiserate with others. Hope you’re doing well.

    Reply
  23. spk says

    November 18, 2016 at 10:04 pm

    Sending you good thoughts on this chilly evening Miss TT. Whether you’re hanging from a chandelier or measuring out meds, you take care. And a cautious ear-scratch to Mr Banjo.

    Reply
  24. Kimoe says

    November 18, 2016 at 10:58 pm

    I said I’d post this the other day and forgot. Life got in the way. So here it is:

    MILK PUNCH

    2cups Vanilla Ice Cream
    1cup Milk
    1/2cup Bourbon
    1/4cup Light Rum
    3tsp Brandy

    Stir ice cream to soften mix in remaining ingredients and serve in a champagne glass with a dash is nutmeg on top.

    It’s a great holiday drink.

    Reply
    • Cat says

      November 19, 2016 at 4:06 pm

      Yum!

      Reply
    • Whyowhy says

      November 20, 2016 at 2:52 am

      Omg, that sounds delish!

      Reply
  25. Jrleaguer says

    November 18, 2016 at 11:17 pm

    I make Paula Deen’s Pumpkin Triffle. Even family members that are not crazy about pumpkin like it.

    Reply
  26. Cat says

    November 19, 2016 at 9:07 am

    My biggest news this week was going to bed late one night to find Lake Jesse had flooded the middle of the bed.

    That cat!

    Turned out, I got caught up playing solitaire, and did not listen to the warning meow that the litter box needed scooping.

    Jesse is weird. He goes once a day. That cat is 90% bladder, I think.

    What a mess!

    Reply
    • loriflack says

      November 19, 2016 at 5:02 pm

      That darn cat ~

      Reply
      • Minky says

        November 19, 2016 at 6:18 pm

        Uh oh! I’ve heard that cat piss can have quite an odor to it. Your cats sound adorable though, lake or no. There’s something special about cats. They have a way about them that no other animals do.

        Reply
        • Cat says

          November 19, 2016 at 6:38 pm

          It does. Luckily, I have really good cleaner and odor neutralizer. The comforter got most of it . That is the hardest element to clean. It’s too big and heavy for my little washing machine. I may need to take it to be professionally cleaned.

          Reply
          • redscorpiio says

            November 19, 2016 at 11:23 pm

            Cat, do you mind me asking what you use? πŸ˜‰ I have many kitties, rag dolls / rescues. Two like to be naughty and go outside of the box. πŸ˜‰ many thanks!

            Reply
            • Cat says

              November 20, 2016 at 6:07 am

              Nature’s Miracle Just For Cats Oxy Cat Stain & Odor Remover.

              It’s a citrus based cleaner and odor remover. Best I’ve ever found, and fairly inexpensive, too. I paid about $5.50 for a 16 ounce spray bottle. It completely removes the stain and smell. And helps keep the cat from remarking. Time will tell. I get all of my cat supplies online. I’ve never seen this in any of the stores.

              I’d post where I got it, but that’s against the rules.

            • Cat says

              November 20, 2016 at 6:34 pm

              Oops. Sorry. It’s 24 ounces, not 16.

              They also have a gallon refill for around $13. Which is interesting, because the mainstream pet shop chains sell the 24 ounce spray for $12.

            • Cat says

              November 20, 2016 at 6:37 pm

              By the way, the one I get is in an orange bottle. They have several types of this stuff. They all sound similar, but are more expensive, and come in the white bottle.

              You can also use it for a laundry booster. I will have to try that.

            • redscorpiio says

              November 26, 2016 at 12:40 pm

              Thanks so much Cat. I posted it twice before but my comments wouldn’t go. πŸ˜‰ I use that brand as well but will seek an orange bottle online! I too order 80% of everything online:)

  27. Diana F. says

    November 19, 2016 at 2:15 pm

    Not sure if this is the right place to post this, but if not I’m sure TT will let me know in her own, indubitable style!

    I am just still so pissed off about Roanoke Nightmare! So, feeling verklempt, I am posting a spiel.

    Sometimes, fame and attention can do weird things to people. Our fucked up, media-saturated world filled with idiotic selfie whores is proof enough of THAT.

    In the past, when young women planned their life & future, they often had goals in mind. Those goal used to be about things like education, career, family, travel, marriage, etc.

    These days, those young women now start this process as PRE-TEENS, with a singular, (wicked scary) goal. GET FAMOUS. Because when you’re famous, everyone loves you; you can do anything you want with no concerns about consequences. And by β€œeveryone”, I mean β€œtotal strangers”.

    To achieve this β€œgoal”, the progress of which is measured by how many strangers they can get to β€œlike” them, they line up to shoot shit into their mouths, faces, asses and boobs until ready to burst.

    Then comes the selfiesβ€”with that maddening β€œi’m too sexy for this world” look. Jumbo anus lips wet and slightly parted? Check. Smoldering β€œsmokey eye come hither” look from a 15 year old child? (yes I am talking to you Cindy Crawford). Check. Fake, snap-in hair to my ass snapped on? Check. Tits front and center, with my arms squishing them together? Check. Standing pigeon-toed so I can have a thigh gap? Check. Sticking my ass out as if ready to take a dump in the woods? DOUBLE CHECK (2 cheeks). OK! Ready to snap, snap, snap and post, post, post my life away!

    HOWEVER!

    IN THE LAND OF SHOW CREATORS and WRITERS……..nekked selfies ain’t gonna do it.
    Whatever shall they do?? They want to be fame whores too dammit. I KNOW!! Let’s create a series with one goal in mind! We’ll make it so horribly graphic, so sexually bizarre, so crossing the line, so gory murder 24/7 and then some!!

    Story? HarUmp. No need for THAT.

    AND WE DON’T EVEN HAVE TO worry about censorship! Kids today LOVE THIS STUFF! They are USED TO IT, so LET’S GIVE THEM SOME MORE! Their parents are used to it, too! They’ll say β€œoh well”, or β€œare you sure you should be watching this, it looks awfully scary in the tv guide”. β€œWell, ok, if the other parents are allowing it”…..”just don’t stay up too late, you’ve got (alternative) school tomorrow”………

    β€œLOL, ROFLMAO, EMOJI DOLLAR SIGN…WE’LL BE FAMOUS”, giggled Ryan Murphy and Brad Falchuk. (RyRad for short).

    These 2 have commented on being proud for creating β€œsophisticated horror” . As in β€œThe Shining”.

    BUT NO. Thanks to RyRad, sophisticated horror is like β€œCrazed albino fucks people to death with a huge dildo in a California Hotel”. And β€œBlack women of today sacrifice themselves for their children……..as in, β€œI am letting my daughter agree to my death….so I can BABYSIT HER (white) GHOST FRIEND”.

    What the fuck???

    Yes, I’m not kidding, it’s RIGHT THERE ON AMERICAN TV! And RyRad is laughing all the way to the bank.

    This Season, this β€œRoanoke Nightmare” was the most ridiculous, bloated, repetitive, confusing, literal, waste of talent commentary on social media I have ever seen. It was slapstick for the sake of personal, private agendas, and that’s about all.

    And the most maddening part of al this? THE SUBJECT MATTER WAS IN FACT VERY IMPORTANT, SO IT WAS A WASTED OPPORTUNITY.

    ***BTW, I ALSO think Gwynnie has turned Mr. Falchuk into a cheesy tv show writer. I’m surprised she isn’t selling replica dildos on Goop.

    Reply
    • Whyowhy says

      November 19, 2016 at 2:20 pm

      Honestly, I didn’t read every wordof this rant but you probably should have put it in the AHS thread. Also, you could have not watched it.

      Reply
      • Diana F. says

        November 19, 2016 at 2:46 pm

        Not only did I watch it honey, but I bought the digital version of this Season and every other one too. I watch them without interruption. Maybe that’s how I can see them for what they are. BTW I buy digital versions of all the show I watch, because I refuse to waste my time on commercials. Cannot stand them. Also, I can tell you did not read it all, that’s clear. But I definitely watched the whole show, at least 5 times, before commenting.

        Because, I do enjoy entertainment. People have been putting on “plays” and “shows” for at least hundreds of years before us, if not more.

        Sure, tv is not the original medium, lol, but we’ve always wanted to “tell” stories, and people have always wanted to hear and see them. And I believe there is something to be gained from story-telling.

        But, to me, this was simply crap. THE STORY. Not the production, not the actors, not the setting…..the story. The WRITING. THE CONCEPT.

        Well, that and the costumes, except for Evan Peters and his “Ghost with a Wig” segment. Those costumes were the bomb!

        Reply
        • Whyowhy says

          November 19, 2016 at 3:09 pm

          Again, “honey,” this belongs in the AHS thread. Clearly you don’t understand the concept of keeping show discussions in those threads.

          So, have a peaceful Saturday, I’m going to go back to following what TT has many times asked from us (and really, she doesn’t ask much) and keep the discussion about stuff that isn’t recapped on the site.

          Reply
        • I.Just.Can't. says

          November 19, 2016 at 4:36 pm

          Diane F,

          I am going to asuume you are fairly new here. Please aquaint yourself with the commenting rules. Although this is an open forum, there are still rules. Also, this is probably not the greatest time to test TT. IJS.
          Happy Holidays.
          That is all.

          Reply
          • Katherine 2.0 says

            November 19, 2016 at 4:56 pm

            Isn’t this an open thread? Which comment rule would apply?

            Reply
          • I.Just.Can't. says

            November 19, 2016 at 5:22 pm

            I really am not in the mood to engage in a petty argument. As was already stated above, the rant should probably be posted on the thread of the show that TT took the time to recap & offer a commenting place on that topic. Was trying to be polite and helpful.
            Wtfever. Carry on
            Jesus Christ! Some people! Ugh!

            Reply
            • Katherine 2.0 says

              November 19, 2016 at 5:41 pm

              You need a nap. That was a legitimate question. I wasn’t trying to be a snarkass. If I am, you will know. πŸ˜‰

              Signed, “Some people!”

            • shay says

              November 19, 2016 at 11:08 pm

              Katherine,
              Telling someone they “need a nap” is quite rude unless they have a “cat” name or Garfield avatar. WhyohWhy and Just.Cant were trying to help you and Diane. No need to get persnickety.

              This is the post where we try not to snark at one another. Like I’m trying really hard to do right now.

            • Cat says

              November 20, 2016 at 5:23 am

              Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz…….

  28. CoCo says

    November 19, 2016 at 3:53 pm

    I’m sure someone will be visiting the WLS very soon! Just saying.

    Reply
    • shay says

      November 19, 2016 at 11:19 pm

      CoCo, too bad the WLS is like “The Hole” or solitary confinement. If it were a pod, like 60 Days In, I would like to dip in and see what it’s like.

      Unfortunately, even a pod would probably be a lot of morons endlessly ranting and telling each other old jokes.

      Reply
  29. Marsha Marsha Marsha says

    November 20, 2016 at 1:23 am

    The new layout is very pretty and much easier to read. I like it.

    My dog brought his toys to my bed and I woke up with a squeaky pig tucked in the curl of my leg.

    Reply
    • Whyowhy says

      November 20, 2016 at 3:28 am

      My dog does the same thing. I wake up with his stuffed hedgehog (his “baby”) near the pillow. At some point, the dog shares baby with me and puts it by my head to sleep with like how he sleeps with it.

      It’s endearing and gross at the same time. Lol

      Reply
  30. Diana F. says

    November 20, 2016 at 1:28 am

    In response to all the comments on my comments, I’m just gonna say:

    1- Didn’t mean to cause such a ruckus. Good Lawd! I’m home alone, and it’s been a rough week for me too, and if I posted the reasons, your panties would bunch and you’d feel like a louse. So I shall spare everyone.
    2- I did post a disclaimer, at the beginning of my offensive rant, noting that TT would let me know if I’d made a mistake.

    3- I understand there’s a separate, Roanoke thread. I always appreciate the time TT takes to fill us in and give her opinion, for EVERY show she shares with us. Posting what I posted where I posted it was NOT a sign of egregious disrespect.
    4- My comment wasn’t so much a comment on an episode (stay with me) as much as it was meant to be a comment-ARY about the horrific state we find ourselves in, with our disgusting, β€œselfie obsessed society”. It was about Fame Whores and Selling Out. It was about the Ancient Art of Story Telling. Books. Plays. Movies. TV. They all TELL STORIES. Because I happen to work in various fields that deal WITH the production of STORIES in the Theatre, Television and Film arena, societal changes and shifts that erode the creative arts aspect of STORY TELLING is of great interest and concern to me.

    5- I certainly didn’t mean to act like a β€œMoron”, and post something that was nothing more than a mindless, oh I can’t forget, endless rant. Sorry that some felt my writings were like a punishment of sorts.
    6- I read TT’s post that introduced us to the Open Forum, and I read ALL the other comments before I made mine; to get a feel for what this thread was about.
    7- I do that because I wouldn’t feel right posting my opinion about a comment I didn’t bother to thoroughly read, review, and think about first.
    8- To me the subject of my long rant was no less important than other long rants also posted in today’s Open Forum. About how someone had a bad week; wore mismatched shoes to work; forgot lightbulbs at Target, and so on.
    9- I happen to believe that in the Good Old USA, opinions are to be at the very least, allowed, better yet, tolerated, and at the very best, understood.
    10- I was under the impression that TT’s demographic and followers were, for the most part, an interesting, vocal group of people who valued humor, family, and those who spoke their mind.
    11- The other thing that attracted me to TT’s site in the first place was that her Followers seemed to care a great deal about the Person behind The Website. (As do I, and I’ve made no secret of that.)
    12- I know this about her Followers because, contrary to popular belief, I am NOT new.
    13- But let me say that if I was new, that was one helluva welcome you Ladies put forth. I was catapulted to my locker in 7th grade, the year I met the β€œmean girls”. I love Vintage so thanks for that bit of nostalgia? (The only upside I can think of). I can see my wide, cuffed, green plaid pants as clear as day……
    14- I think TT is a terribly honest person that has a True Gift. And as all great people do, she attracts opinionated people in a wide variety of types. It’s called β€œdiversity”, and it’s something most people consider a great thing to have.
    15- Not even on my worst day, of my entire life, would I purposely even come close to even thinking about β€œtesting” this person I have followed for years, and admire tremendously. I’d love to take her out for a great dinner!
    16- Well known fact: when people are trying to be β€œpolite”, they are simply polite, not curt, and not projecting an β€œI couldn’t care less” attitude.
    17- In closing, saying β€œjust saying” is in fact a passive aggressive method of communication, and the phrase enables the utterer to deny all responsibility for their anger, yet they score a direct hit.

    I use it myself, when I feel like a hit and run.

    Allegedly.

    Reply
    • Katherine 2.0 says

      November 20, 2016 at 1:47 am

      Brava!!

      Reply
      • I.Just.Can't. says

        November 20, 2016 at 2:41 am

        Congrats on being “that person”. When I said I was trying to be polite & helpful, I meant it. No passive-agressive here. I’m not sure why Kate had to insert herself. Guess y’all were just hell bent on being stupid cunts today. Congrats again for ruining the thread.
        In my opinion
        Allegedly

        Reply
        • belladonna says

          November 20, 2016 at 8:31 am

          Pot meet kettle. Imo.

          Reply
    • shay says

      November 20, 2016 at 2:34 am

      Diane F.F.S. (FTFY) If you have 17 things to say and none of them are funny, perhaps pare it down to 2 things. Or start your own blog.

      If you can recognize your own comments as “rants”, perhaps dial it back.

      Just because TT isn’t moderating or following this post (right now) doesn’t mean you can treat us like that street corner you do your usual shouting at.

      We are actually trying to help you fit in to TT’s society. But if you want to keep being a long-winded pariah while blaming us? That is no bueno. Y no gracias.

      Reply
      • I.Just.Can't. says

        November 20, 2016 at 2:44 am

        Preach Shay! For fucks sake! Lots of bitches today!!! Unbelivable.

        Reply
        • I.Just.Can't. says

          November 20, 2016 at 2:49 am

          ^*unbelievable… guess I can’t type since I didn’t take that nap I needed. Lol

          Reply
          • Whyowhy says

            November 20, 2016 at 2:56 am

            Right, you guys? Geez!

            Reply
            • shay says

              November 20, 2016 at 3:01 am

              WhyOhWhy! This is your fault Dub-O-Dub! Trying to keep Window Lickers away from their natural habitat. See what happens.

            • Whyowhy says

              November 20, 2016 at 3:05 am

              Lol! Following those dang rules gets me every time. That’s what I get for pointing someone on the right direction.

          • shay says

            November 20, 2016 at 2:58 am

            The nap. Only if your name was “I Just Cat.”

            Reply
        • shay says

          November 20, 2016 at 2:56 am

          I.Just.Cant, I’ll never understand why people look to argue. Especially here. Especially with those of us with a record for always joking or generally being nice.

          I think because of that, I tend to lose my shit when someone comes at any of us sideways.

          Like, do you know who you’re shit talking? Woah, B, I am not the one. Why you wanna buck up against us when you can roll with us? Its not even an either or situation. Just act normal, B.

          Reply
          • Minky says

            November 20, 2016 at 3:06 am

            Shay, you’re my hero. ☺️ Now, where’s my Alka Seltzer? I’ve been celebrating a little tonight with the Mexican food, and now I have a touch of the indigestion. I need a pharmacist!!! Hahaha!!!

            Reply
            • shay says

              November 20, 2016 at 3:31 am

              Minx, maybe you can’t digest all this bullshit you’re reading. Try prilosec (rx is cheaper than otc).

              TT leaves one unmoderated sub and people think they must step up and take over.

              I’m sorry, Im not interested in engaging with anyone’s collection of 17 homeless people’s sky-is-falling cardboard sandwich boards.

    • Cat says

      November 20, 2016 at 5:34 am

      Personally, I had no problem with the length or content of the original post.

      Heck, I posted about my cat peeing on the bed. If people don’t want to read it, they can simply scroll past it.

      I did kind of enjoy the “nap” argument. I like naps. πŸ™‚

      Reply
    • SaraSally says

      November 20, 2016 at 7:48 am

      Diane F. I wonder if you broke your post up into smaller posts, it would make reading them much more palatable. You prob have the same same word quota as all the regular posters, but you monopolize too much space at a given time. Many people (old & new) post ad nausea, whether they are seeking (or giving) guidance, affirmation, company, misery among company, or fellowship. Our self absorption & need for attention through these posts makes us our own unique reposit of family members we just adore.
      Much of what you said was interesting, but it became a ramble read for me My attention is on check when reading blogs. That’s the purpose of reading blogs. I put my brain on autopilot & enjoy TT & readers easy, peasy, ever so clever shares. May I suggest that you break up your subject matter, & do multi posts focused under main points.

      Reply
  31. shay says

    November 20, 2016 at 3:08 am

    Anyone listen to the new Childish Gambino track he dropped Thursday night? Redbone. Its dope. He’s singing funk. I also love those “Like a Version” live studio sessions of “Sober” and his Tamia cover “So Into You.”

    Go peep all 3 on youtube under “Childish Gambino” and get at me after.

    Reply
    • I.Just.Can't. says

      November 20, 2016 at 4:41 am

      And how bout that apple cake…
      hope you read Mimky’s aftercomment on last daily tea. Don’t forget the oil & be sure to grease the pyrex dish. Without the oil you’d be wishing you made the “weird noodles” lol. I bought all my ingredients (es) and am going to tackle this cake myself! Sounds delish!

      Reply
      • shay says

        November 20, 2016 at 4:50 am

        Ooh thanks for the reminder, Just Cant. I’ll have to go back and write it all down. Mink, does it come in Imperial measurements? I’m not much of a baker though I have a yummy mini pecan tart recipe (1″ in diameter) which is like a not so sweet pecan pie in a cream cheese shortbread crust. Google the photo. It comes out just like that.

        Reply
        • Minky says

          November 20, 2016 at 5:03 am

          I’ll get right to work on converting. I’ll try to put the measurements into fluid and dry cups. For some reason European recipes always do things in either grams/milliliters or “spoonfuls’ and “cups”. When they write cups they mean coffee cups. And everybody’s coffee cups are a different size. And you can never really be sure if it’s heaping spoonfuls or level ones. It’s cray-cray. I’ll try to get it done by tomorrow.

          Reply
          • shay says

            November 20, 2016 at 5:21 am

            No need, minx. My sister has a scale and I have a graduate degree in math. I think I can do it. I’m just laze.

            Reply
            • Minky says

              November 20, 2016 at 5:54 am

              Graduate degree in math?! Good, then you can help me with some word problems someday.

              I’ve been thinking a lot about DaVinci’s “Last Supper”, and they say that somehow DaVinci include some pythagorean ratios that have to do with music in the tapestries on the two walls behind Jesus and his crew. I don’t see it, but I’ll just go ahead and take the author’s word for it.

              I swear I got an A in Geometry back in the day in Junior High. But if I had to do a theorem now I’d just use my own whoopin’ stick to brain myself.

      • shay says

        November 20, 2016 at 4:53 am

        Just Cant, And it was called a “weird noodle salad” — as if I don’t know how to make noodles or a salad. I dare anyone to order that a thai restaurant for a good ol’ batch of Thai side-eye.

        Reply
        • I.Just.Can't. says

          November 20, 2016 at 5:05 am

          Lmao ???

          Reply
  32. BeetsWhy says

    November 20, 2016 at 4:39 am

    I let my DVR pick up Dr Phil just because it’s on at 4 and can’t possibly conflict with real shows. I watch it every now and then when nothing else is interesting. I saw that Shelly Duvall was on and that she had hit a rough patch, what I did not expect to see was a blatant abuse of her obvious psychological issues.

    She could not put a sentence together let alone answer any of his questions…for the entire hour. it was painful to watch but you hold out hope that he will get her help. oops, no. I was disgusted at the end of the show, I’m glad it has gotten attention so she maybe can get real help.

    Reply
    • Erica says

      November 20, 2016 at 4:52 am

      YOu make me happy that my “record it everyday even though I might not watch” show is The Chew.

      Reply
      • belladonna says

        November 20, 2016 at 8:36 am

        I love The Chew. Carla in particular.

        Reply
        • Erica says

          November 21, 2016 at 5:25 am

          ME TOO! I’ve always adored Carla. I have one of her cookbooks. I forget which one, but it had a dim sum curry beef recipe that I used for my family’s cooking contest – and I won with it!

          hmmm… need to make them again. Maybe for the Super Bowl.

          Reply
  33. Naike says

    November 20, 2016 at 7:59 am

    Reading various post on Shelly Duvall being on Dr. Phill; which sounds truly, horrible. Back in the day, I found his to be compassionate, and really assisted his guest in receiving the assistance needed. Now, I find him abusive, bullying, dismissive, and sarcastic; which is never helpful to those having challenges and need assitance. I can’t believe he still has a show, and audience the way he treat his guest.

    Reply
    • belladonna says

      November 20, 2016 at 9:00 am

      I watched the show, and it was truly exploitative. It’s one thing to have an addict come on to help illuminate what an addict goes through and to get them into a recovery program, and I don’t mind those shows. But the obvious mental illness of Shelly was heart breaking, and should have been private.

      Reply
      • Naike says

        November 20, 2016 at 11:14 am

        belladonna: I’ve stopped watching Dr. Phil for sometime, but from all I’ve read it does sound heart breaking and should have be done privately. I trust Shelly receives the support she need.

        Reply
  34. Naike says

    November 20, 2016 at 8:01 am

    *him

    Reply
  35. PeachyKeen says

    November 20, 2016 at 1:02 pm

    While never been a fan of Dr. Phil..you always tell when ratings are waning. Jon Benet now Duvall..
    Contempt is too nice a word.

    Reply
  36. Spunky2015 says

    November 20, 2016 at 1:22 pm

    Shame on Oprah. She owns the Drs. Phil and Oz shows. She thinks she knows everything considering she has never married or raised a child.

    Reply
    • Erica says

      November 20, 2016 at 7:03 pm

      No she doesnt. They bought her out years ago.

      Reply
      • Erica says

        November 20, 2016 at 7:23 pm

        Ooops… she still owns a small percentage, but they started producking their own shows years ago.

        Reply
  37. Cheryl B. says

    November 20, 2016 at 1:43 pm

    So, not sure where to comment on this, you may all have seen, on A&E Killing Season episode 4, Teresa Guidice lawyer shows up in it as “Atlantic City lawyer” involved with evidence of the serial killings. FYI for those interested.

    Reply
  38. tamaratattles says

    November 20, 2016 at 2:54 pm

    Considering the source, I’d say this takes the cake for me on y’alls ridiculous, unsupervised behavior.

    Minky said, “But, my god, sometimes the stupidity is just too fucking much. People open their obnoxious mouths and fucking just let β€˜er rip. It’s like, β€œReally? Like, you think what you just said is totally okay? But I’m the one that needs to shut up? Alright. Well fuck it, then. ”

    That is oddly EXACTLY what I have been thinking since Wednesday. And exactly why I shut up.

    Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother’s eye.

    Reply
    • Katherine 2.0 says

      November 20, 2016 at 3:16 pm

      Yes, yes and yes.

      You self-appointed guardians are slowly draining the joy out of a site you profess to love with your overreactive, gang-up mean girl tactics. And I’M the rude one? For asking someone to clarify a commenting rule? Then for reacting to a shitty, out-of left field comment? How was anyone trying to “help” me? Help me with what exactly? Little Miss Sunshine never addressed my question, but put me on blast for even asking. Bitch, please.

      Minky, your obsessive and sycophantic posting is fucking obnoxious. Any clever or funny comments you make are completely overshadowed by your constant posting, and most are either offensive, insensitive or ass kissing nonsense. Jesus, do you have a life? That ebonics lesson the other day told me all I need to know about you.

      Shay, you used to be one of my favorite posters. WTF??

      As for I Just Cant? I just can’t with you. You’re ridiculous.

      Cat? I love you. That’s all.

      TT? Apologies. I am usually a pretty innocuous poster, but this shit is insane and deserves an unbridled response.

      Reply
      • tamaratattles says

        November 20, 2016 at 3:20 pm

        Oh I get it Katherine. I’ve been hearing and feeling similar sentiments lately. Might as well get it all on the table.

        Reply
        • shay says

          November 20, 2016 at 3:32 pm

          Well, during a hemorrhage I cannot trust myself. Perhaps I’ve overstepped the line or got too snappy. I’m sorry.

          Unfortunately I don’t even remember what “myself” is most days… sigh.
          I try my best. I really do. Mostly to be quirky and funny. Sometimes thoughtful and kind. And other times a fierce bitch.

          But if what I’m saying is taking away from what TT has built, I will take a step back. That is never my intention. I have to believe you because I can’t listen to myself.

          2 hour brain MRI tomorrow (followup of my sentinel headache– hopefully I can get some answers on all the blackouts, lost memories and missing time).

          Sorry for any distress I’ve caused, and sorry Katherine for not being able to count on me.

          Reply
          • Katherine 2.0 says

            November 20, 2016 at 3:38 pm

            Oh, Shay, the bulk of my issues don’t involve you. I know you’re going through some major shit. That post to me was a bit shocking and out of character. That’s all.

            Reply
            • Minky says

              November 20, 2016 at 4:11 pm

              Hey, I’m sorry if I’ve hurt anyone. I asked TT if I went too far the other day, but I got no answer. So I do apologize if I’ve made an ass out of myself.

              And you’re right, I don’t have much of a life, I’m very lonely and I go through a lot of shit I never mention, but I’m not a fucking sycophant. I don’t think you really know that that word means. And the way you’re talking to me tells me everything I need to know about you. Hope you feel better Katherine.

            • shay says

              November 20, 2016 at 4:49 pm

              No one is trying to be rude. I think we all try to share, support and be funny. When I feel like jabs are taken I get riled up and go for the t.k.o.

              Katherine you have always been kind and gracious toward me, I owed you that in return. I don’t think telling someone to “take a nap” is kind, though.

              Minky, I missed what happened in the other thread. But from what I gather, TT had a VERY scary and traumatic day. Whatever you said may have come off as flippant and uncaring. Two things I know you would only unknowingly have directed to TT. Maybe it wasn’t clear that other people’s scary stories weren’t what she needed. She probably just needed, “OMG. I’M SO SORRY. ARE YOU OK, TT???” And she didn’t get that from you or me… or any of us.

              As for “mean-girling” Diane F? Nope. I will never tolerate 11 paragraphs and 17 points. I literally had to scroll 7 pages. Twice. There isnt a subject interesting enough or entertaining for that nonsense. Veto.

            • tamaratattles says

              November 20, 2016 at 5:07 pm

              I wonder if anyone bothered to read this post and wondered why I didn’t share anything with you at all, and why I said I was not going to moderate the forum, or why it came up so early, or why I mentioned that DT USED to be a place where we could share without getting smartass shit said back to us.

              For me that happened last Wednesday when I had a very traumatic day involved in county wide man hunt for an armed gunman in the exact area where I was and being swarmed by cop cars and chaos AMONG OTHER ISSUES. The responses I got were things like, “Well, you wouldn’t last a day in LA where that shit happens all the time” as if I lived in a suburban McMansion someplace with a husband and 2.5 kids and the biggest turmoil in my life is when Muffy wears something from last season to the country club brunch. I am pretty sure I’ve made it clear here that I live in the ghetto with frequent gunfire, my house has been robbed, there are gangs and methheads all over the place and I try really hard not to leave the house after dark.

              The worst part of it all was the comment came from MINKY who I thought was well aware of my situation and the anxiety and oh I dunno might have just fucking said. “Wow, that sounds scary. Glad they caught the gunman and no one was hurt and you made it home.”

              And NO I was not particularly feeling like answering your “Was it something I said?” email. Or your newest “IF I blah blah blah apology.

              But then to come on here and just run your fucking mouth for a million comments while talking about how insensitive EVERY FUCKING ONE ELSE is was just that one toke over the line for me.

              So that was why there was no usual DT post this week because I don’t feel comfortable SHARING here anymore and I ALMOST Hit the nuclear button to blow up the whole goddamn site.

              I hope that clears things up just a little.

            • Katherine 2.0 says

              November 20, 2016 at 4:26 pm

              I feel just peachy, Minky. And I know damned well what the word sycophant means. Maybe you should look it up yourself.
              Am not buying your apology for a minute. It smacks of insincerity. As for being lonely, maybe you ought to cultivate some real life buddies. Do wonders for you.

            • Whyowhy says

              November 20, 2016 at 4:41 pm

              Since it seems that a lot of the fighting started from my comment pointing comments to the AHS thread, I must also apologize. Nothing in my initial comment was to be bitch or a “mean girl.” I did go back and see if it could have been misconstrued as such and I don’t think I was mean with my comment until condescended to. Ifor anyone took it that was, I am sorry.

              I love this site and love the comments and don’t want to cause TT any additional stress or be an annoyance.

              So, I apologize for unintentionally starting any arguments.

            • Minky says

              November 20, 2016 at 4:56 pm

              I suppose you’re the ultimate judge of what’s sincere and what isn’t. You can sure see through, can’t you? I meant I hope you feel better about yourself. Thanks for the advice.

            • Minky says

              November 20, 2016 at 5:13 pm

              @Shay I don’t know what the fuck I did wrong. Apparently I annoy everybody and they’re all just silently judging me and hate me for being obnoxious, insensitive, sycophantic, etc. Including TT. I’ve apologized, but apparently it’s not sincere enough for the ultimate arbiter of sincerity. I gotta say Katherine, that’s a lot of adjectives for someone who’s so above it all.

              I made a post in response to an illiterate comment done by a Porsha supporter in an old post that TT put up and then took down very quickly. There I make fun of the way the poster misspelled a bunch of words and the way she justifies the beat down Kenya got at the reunion. Katherine 2.0 declared that my comment was offensive. I’m not apologizing for that. Yeah, it was meant to be offensive, just like the idiots who support physical assault are offensive to me.

            • shay says

              November 20, 2016 at 5:38 pm

              Mimky, take a breath. You’re still my TT soulmate. It could’ve been me that did that in the other thread. If you’re quick to respond, being able to be witty and clever, we sometimes sacrifice our reading comprehension in exchange for it.

              Don’t worry about a couple of people here who aren’t your friends. You have a lot of friends here who get you.

              But take it off-line with TT and figure out what happened, where it went wrong, and how/if it can be mended. You are popular here for you kindness, caring, wit, sincerity and support. But we aren’t perfect and make mistakes.

              Sometimes we need to slow down and listen. Not just wait for our turn to contribute a story or comment or joke. A lot of damage can be done inadvertently when the other person is hurting and needing compassion, but we miss it; and one-up, or tease, or add our own anecdote in jest. Maybe it’s received as you think you’re better, or you think they are complaining about nothing… but it was actually scary and they were still terrified when the exchange happens.

              All respect and love to you both.

            • Cat says

              November 20, 2016 at 7:00 pm

              Holy crap, TT! I completely missed your share about the gunman! Good grief, that had to be horrible for you!

              My home is my sanctuary. Home is supposed to be SAFE.

              I’ve said it before, and will say it again. You are always welcome in my home. It’s very safe here. But sometimes boring.

              As for the rest, my philosophy is simple: I try to go with the flow. I try to let people be people. In many ways, I live life like a cat. I am very flexible, and put up with a lot from people. I may want affection, but only when I want it. And I take lots of naps.

              And if someone pisses me off, I may hiss and claw, but usually just walk away. And sit in my tree. And enjoy the wonders of Life.

              And, I may pee in your shoes when you aren’t looking. πŸ™‚

        • Katherine 2.0 says

          November 20, 2016 at 5:24 pm

          Oh do shut it, Minky. You continue to prove my point. Here’s a thought: I said what I had to say. From now on, why don’t you stay in your lane and I will ignore you as I usually do.

          Reply
          • Minky says

            November 20, 2016 at 5:54 pm

            I will not shut it because you told me, Katherine. You have no point. All you have is an ax to grind because you’re a weak bitch who lurks in the background and waits for the right time to get a swing in a pile up. Fucking coward.

            I feel very bad about not realizing where TT was coming from the other day. I was an obtuse bitch and I’m very sorry about that. If I could take it back I would. You, Katherine, go get bent.

            Reply
  39. shay says

    November 20, 2016 at 5:28 pm

    TT, I read the post. And I freaked out. And some cunt told me to CHILL in all caps. I admitted I may have prematurely lost my chill and bitch kept on pressing me— when I was apparently right! Anyway, I got snippy. With a quickness. And am responsible for everyone losing their chill lIke a stack of dominos. Sorry.

    Reply
  40. I.Just.Can't. says

    November 20, 2016 at 6:49 pm

    I legitimately was initially trying to be helpful and thought I was polite. But when someone tells me, “you need to take a nap” out of left field after I already stated I don’t want an argument & has already pressed me, then yeah, I’m going to call you a stupid cunt. I am human. Evidently I am “ridiculous” now, too. No apology for Katherine 2.0 from me. My issue was actually with her.

    As for Diane F, I was trying to be helpful. I do apologize for lumping her in with Katherine 2.0.

    I don’t come here looking for a fight. I am also tiring of those who do.

    Reply
    • Cat says

      November 20, 2016 at 7:09 pm

      I love naps. I get upset when someone tells me NOT to take one.

      Reply
      • shay says

        November 20, 2016 at 7:11 pm

        My ex husband used to tell people, “trying to take sleep away from shay is like trying to take honey from a bear.”

        Reply
        • Cat says

          November 20, 2016 at 7:25 pm

          Speaking of Bears, I was once attacked by “The Bear”. Right here on this site.

          TT aways warned everyone “Do not poke The Bear.”

          I didn’t think I had, but found myself being attacked, anyway. This is how I survived:

          Instead of attacking back, I simply said “Thank you” to the insults. I sometimes responded just with a smiley face. But as TT suggested, I did not poke The Bear. I pretty much just rolled over, and played dead. I did not run in fear, but I stood my ground. I would not take the bait.

          Eventually, The Bear left me alone. Then, she blocked me on Twitter, which was really weird, because I am rarely on Twitter.

          Anyway, that’s how I try to handle insults. Here, and everywhere. Because, in the end, Life is short. And slinging insults accomplishes nothing.

          Reply
          • I.Just.Can't. says

            November 20, 2016 at 7:49 pm

            Cat,

            good advice. Thanks for sharing. Duly noted. ?

            Reply
          • shay says

            November 20, 2016 at 8:22 pm

            Cat, you always pleasantly surprise me. I love that stiry. Was “The Bear” a regular commenter? Even TT didn’t poke it?

            I am usually the injured lion. Help me out, be my friend, and I’m cuddly and cozy. Threaten my friends or annoy me? I’ll scratch out your fucking eyes.

            Reply
            • Cat says

              November 20, 2016 at 8:27 pm

              Yes. She was very vocal here.

            • Cat says

              November 20, 2016 at 8:32 pm

              Like I said, I take a lot of abuse. But come after a friend? That’s a different story. If I know the friend can take care of themselves, I back off.

              But, I HATE bullies, who pick on those who appear weak. If someone kicks someone who is already down, I will usually step in.

            • Minky says

              November 20, 2016 at 8:58 pm

              You’re a lot smarter than I am Cat. My big mouth doesn’t seem to have a safety on it.

              Unfortunately I’m very oblivious to a lot of things sometimes. That’s mostly because I don’t feel like I have to be on guard because I don’t ever have any bad intentions. I figure I have nothing to hide, so I don’t want to go to the trouble of watching what I say or keeping an eye out for anything. I’m a straight shooter and very direct about how I feel. Sometimes that gets me into trouble or I get misinterpreted, but I figure that other people will know my intentions because I make them pretty obvious.

              If I fuck up, and I care about the person I might have hurt with my sloppiness, I’m more than willing to do whatever I can to make it right.

            • Cat says

              November 20, 2016 at 9:24 pm

              We all have our moments, Minky. Doesn’t make you a terrible person. It makes you human. <3

    • I.Just.Can't. says

      November 20, 2016 at 7:45 pm

      I would also like to offer a heartfelt apolgy to TT. I read your gunman story and wanted to say something to you to give you comfort. I didn’t because it brought on some serious flashbacks for me. (Details I have shared with you privately). I am so sorry you had to go through that.

      I also think you know my commenting habits are not to insight arguments. Apologies to YOU for my part in the shitshow derailing of the thread.

      “The road to hell is paved with good intentions.” Allegedly

      Reply
      • I.Just.Can't. says

        November 20, 2016 at 11:11 pm

        Tried to reply to some others but having difficulty with new mobile format coupled with my ancient browser.

        Just wanted to say that I’ve really enjoyed the majority of you all & have found this space a sanctuary many times. Shay, good luck with the MRI tomorrow. Minky, hang in there, you are a good person. Justanothermary, you will survive holidays alone & my heart still goes out to you.

        To all of the rest of you winderful people here, I have never been brave enough to share my real life struggles here so please know that I admire those of you who do.

        TT, thank you for all you do with this blog and all your hard work, you really are the best!

        I hope every single one of you (even the ones who have been rude to me or visa versa) have the best holiday ever! We have been so divided as a nation that I hope everyone can come together in whichever way brings you comfort and joy.

        Best wishes to all! ?

        Reply
        • Minky says

          November 21, 2016 at 2:15 am

          Take care I.Just.Can’t. You’re awesome.

          Reply
          • shay says

            November 21, 2016 at 2:31 am

            Thanks Minx and Just Cant.

            Can someone/anyone explain the mean girl references and complaints? Are those directed at me? They sound so cryptic and coded.

            In my state, I feel a total abandonment may be what’s being asked of me. I’m ok with that. I’ve never wanted to cause trouble or make this place less fun, supportive or hilarious.

            I feel like a malfunctioning robot. Please tell me if I need a charge or total reboot or if I need to turn the self-destruct key.

            I feel lost in a sea of other people’s annoyance and anger.

            Reply
            • Minky says

              November 21, 2016 at 3:23 am

              Same here. I’m questioning how much of a bitch I’ve possibly been without even knowing it. This is all so weird. I’m totally okay with owning up to anything I’ve done. And if it’s bad then I’m truly sorry. Then again I’ve been wrong about shit before and, like I said, I can be a bit oblivious sometimes. Something about this whole thing makes me feel a bit ill. Something isn’t right. Maybe taking a step back is a good idea.

  41. belladonna says

    November 20, 2016 at 11:56 pm

    Can we say what we are thankful for in this thread? I’m thankful for good books, good friends, and good merlot. And the best time is talking about the books with friends while drinking the merlot. I’m thankful for recaps here, and making fun of reality tv. And pumpkin cheesecake.

    Reply
    • Cat says

      November 21, 2016 at 7:51 am

      Great idea!

      I am thankful for my life, and all the wonders of the Universe that surround me, every day.

      And, TACOS! This is the best part of living alone! I do not have to do the traditional Thanksgiving. I am making turkey Tacos!

      Reply
      • belladonna says

        November 21, 2016 at 10:45 am

        Turkey Tacos! Yes, I no longer do the big meal. It’s a relief, really, to not spend two days cooking.

        Reply
        • Cat says

          November 21, 2016 at 11:23 am

          It makes no sense to me. Why spend a month’s worth of grocery money on one meal, just for myself? Why cook all day and clean all night for a meal that takes just a few minutes to eat?

          I would rather whip up some yummy Tacos, then sit back, sip some wine, and relax.

          Reply
          • Dee says

            November 22, 2016 at 6:22 am

            Great idea Cat. We are going to have something simple this year. Every year we decide what we really feel like having. One year sea food, felt kinda funny but it was good. I’ll be thinking of you, Dee

            Reply
  42. Maisey says

    November 21, 2016 at 1:35 am

    In July someone asked “Where is Maisey?” Why isn’t she commenting? That is after several years of enjoying the back and forth of these interactions.

    I answered ASAP and wished everyone a happy Fourth of July. But no more comments.

    It is obvious I still read. Why wouldn’t I? I truly enjoy Tamara’s saucy and biting recaps and commentarys. I also, for the most part, enjoy the back and forth between the posters– even when it becomes a little testy.
    But A lot of people don’t feel comfortable sharing here. No, not because we are special little snowflakes who can’t take it. The site has been taken over by the same old posters who have let their comments go to their heads. Hey…back off a bit. You are on the attack constantly—-and you don’t even know why you are attacking anymore. It become just damn habit for you at this point.

    Nice new look, Tamara

    Reply
    • Minky says

      November 21, 2016 at 2:12 am

      Hey there. Good to see you again. Hope you’re doing good.

      Reply
    • tamaratattles says

      November 21, 2016 at 2:54 am

      Maisey, when you disappeared, I admit I thought I must have said something, because I do have a slick mouth at times. The Daily Tea used to be a neutral zone where people were either supportive or didn’t say anything at all. Sadly that is not the case anymore and I don’t know how to fix it. It’s always the wrong people who seem to take accountability and those who should do not.

      I find myself in a situation where the “oldtimers” seem to have formed a bitchy little clique. I’ve been emailed about it for quite awhile. I just have so much going on that I don’t have a lot of time to deal with grown women being so dismissive of each other. I don’t have a problem with fighting and ugly words in the regular posts. I have plenty of harsh words there myself, but The Daily Tea has always been our stupid little “safe place” and now it’s not. And I am sorry about that.

      Thanks for popping in! I hope your Thankgiving if you so celebrate is fantastic.

      Reply
      • Dee says

        November 21, 2016 at 2:51 pm

        Tamara, I love what you wrote. I have been AWOL a bit. Love the new format!

        Reply
    • belladonna says

      November 21, 2016 at 2:55 am

      Maisey, I enjoy your posts, and wish you felt more comfortable here. It has become a bit hostile.

      I agree about the new look, I’m really loving it.

      Reply
    • T D says

      November 21, 2016 at 3:55 am

      Maisey! Please send a postcard every now and then. I sure do miss you. Happy Holidays.

      Reply
    • Cat says

      November 21, 2016 at 7:58 am

      Oh, Maisey! That is really sad, because what you said is so true.

      I come from a dysfunctional family (doesn’t everyone?) So, I’m used to being caught in the middle of conflict. But I agree, a lot of the fighting lately has come out of the blue.

      My Thanksgiving wish is that everyone here can mend friendships, so we can all get along.

      Reply
    • Yet another Katie says

      November 21, 2016 at 1:23 pm

      Maisey, thank you for eloquently saying what I’ve been thinking and feeling. I rarely post for fear of unintentionally starting an argument. I love to read the recaps, though!

      Just be kind. Nothing is gained by cruelty, but much is lost.

      Reply
  43. I.Just.Can't. says

    November 21, 2016 at 12:55 pm

    I read a refidherator magnet that I’ve had for some time. It reads,”Don’t make excises for nasty people. You can’t put a flower in an asshole and call it a vase.”

    I’ve had a good nap and realize that yesterday that nasty person was me.

    I’ve had some serious shit on my plate and took it out on undeseving people here. I am so sorry! I have been on the receiving end before and know I must be perceived as the ultimate cunt.

    Again, I am very sorry and it will not happen again.

    Mea Culpa

    Reply
    • I.Just.Can't. says

      November 21, 2016 at 1:36 pm

      *^that was suppoed to be refrigerator and undeserving. Difficulty typing while eating crow.

      Reply
      • I.Just.Can't. says

        November 21, 2016 at 1:42 pm

        **^and excuses! I.Just.Can’t.Type. Hope my sentiment comes through despite my typos. Aaaargh! ?

        Reply
        • belladonna says

          November 21, 2016 at 2:40 pm

          Your sentiment does come through. Eating crow, add some cummin, I mean cumin, we’ve all had to eat crow at some time. Recognizing when you’ve been not been at your best is important.

          Reply
        • Cat says

          November 21, 2016 at 7:23 pm

          Yum! I hope you at least deep fried the crow. With mashed potatoes and corn on the cob. Finger licking good! πŸ™‚

          That’s also a good excuse for your typos. Greasy fingers. πŸ™‚

          Reply
    • shay says

      November 21, 2016 at 1:57 pm

      So you DID need a nap? Goddamnit;)

      Reply
      • Minky says

        November 21, 2016 at 3:51 pm

        I still need a pharmacist.

        I’m still thinking about “The Shining” too, and some of my favorite quotes from that movie. This past week, and the past year in general, has got me all fucked up in the head.

        And I still can’t get why Dr. Phil did what he did to Shelly Duvall. Nobody deserves that. I guess life is a lot like the Overlook hotel. In one of the most famous scenes of the movie, where Danny sees the twins at the end of that hallway, after he has his vision he says “Tony, I’m scared.”

        And then “Tony” tells Danny: “Remember what Mr. Hallorann said. It’s just like pictures in a book, Danny. It isn’t real.”

        That quote helps me get through a lot of shit. None of it is real.

        Reply
        • Dee says

          November 21, 2016 at 3:57 pm

          When life is crazy, upsetting, I try to tell myself that some day it will be a funny story. Sometimes it takes a while.

          Reply
      • Cat says

        November 21, 2016 at 7:24 pm

        Never underestimate the benefits of a good catnap. πŸ™‚

        Reply
  44. Cat says

    November 21, 2016 at 7:34 pm

    I had one if those weird Twilight Zone days today.

    Early last week, Fed Ex buzzed my apartment. He had two packages with my address, but was confused because the name was not mine. I refused the packages.

    Then, Saturday, Fed Ex was back. This time, I didn’t get to the door in time. He left a notice saying the package was at the office.

    Today, I get into my car to drive down the steep hill to the office. The car is dead. Battery, I think. So I wobble like a Weeble to the office, and climb the gazillion over sized steps to the office.

    No package.

    Now, I’m paranoid. Is someone in my building or in one of the nearby buildings using the little old disabled cat lady’s address to safely smuggle illegal goods? Drugs? What do I do if another package arrives? Refuse it? Accept it and call the cops?

    Help!!!!

    Reply
    • Joanplus2dogs says

      November 21, 2016 at 7:48 pm

      If you still have the notice, just call their customer service. It is possible the name was correct but apt# typed incorrectly. Someone recognized the name & gave the package to them or whoever sent it gave them the corrected address. You probably can have delivery person contact their supervisor if it happens again on what their protocol is.

      I had an officer trying to serve paperwork at my door a few weeks ago. Turns out he was at wrong building.

      Reply
      • Cat says

        November 21, 2016 at 8:16 pm

        At first I thought that someone had entered the wrong address. That has happened before. Someone buzzed my apartment looking for someone. I did not let them in. Turned out, the person they were looking for was in the next building.

        These are tiny buildings. 10 apartments each. And about 43 buildings. Easy to get lost. That’s why I live here.

        Reply
    • shay says

      November 21, 2016 at 7:58 pm

      Cat, this is a redirect scam. Look it up. They may have more of your info than you think. They may be ordering things with your credit card and having it sent to you.

      Sign up for FedEx alerts and you will be notified a package is coming and can call the authorities. (If you call FedEx to decline the package, the shipper will reroute it for pickup by “you.”)

      Reply
      • Cat says

        November 21, 2016 at 8:12 pm

        Thanks. I’ll check it out.

        But, I have no credit cards. I do have a debit card, which is about to expire. But there is no weird activity on my account.

        Reply
  45. T D says

    November 22, 2016 at 5:46 pm

    The code is the end result of public education. I still remember my teachers names and most of what they were trying to instill. Teach your children well. Thank you Mrs. Bryant for teaching me to read.

    Reply
  46. Cat says

    November 22, 2016 at 6:12 pm

    Sorry you were attacked for your opinion, every1becalm. Some people don’t seem to get that there is no right or wrong to an opinion.

    Some also obviously can’t see the forest for the trees. I feel kind of sorry for those “mean girls”. If they can’t see that they were part of the pain inflicted upon others, I’m afraid they will never change.

    I hope you will be willing to give comments another try.

    Reply
  47. cammierari says

    November 22, 2016 at 11:59 pm

    I don’t get it. An open thread is an open thread, so why would anyone be told their post should be elsewhere, or told that it’s too long, or be called a name like cunt? I have stopped coming here daily mostly because I was called misogynistic and a few other not so nice things by TT herself, and she doesn’t even know me. As far as I know I hadn’t broken any “commenting commandments” so I figured since I really don’t watch reality tv much at all, I would drop out of the community. There is definitely a clique-y feel here where there never was before. Too bad, but maybe it’s just the way of all blog comment sections after a while.
    So sorry to hear about your traumatizing experience TT. Hope things have settled down and you have a peaceful Thanksgiving.

    Reply
    • Cheryl B. says

      November 23, 2016 at 9:02 am

      I know I’m gonna reconsider my thoughts. After a week and re-reading some reasons why I took a break, I really hope all have learned something. Happy Thanksgiving to all, and Cat, you are a superhero.

      Reply
      • Cat says

        November 23, 2016 at 9:30 am

        Wow, thanks. I don’t want to be a superhero, though. I just want to be me. πŸ™‚

        When the topic of “groups” came up, that surprised me. I’m not one that readily joins groups. I don’t want to be labeled that way. I don’t “belong” to any group. If someone says otherwise, they are lying.

        People tend to use me. I have been told I have charisma…whatever that means. People are drawn to me. At Disney, that was used, by others, to manipulate people. I hated that, and fought against it.

        I see everyone here as an individual. With a right to an opinion.

        I am a loner. I don’t want to follow. I don’t want to lead.

        Reply
        • Cheryl B. says

          November 23, 2016 at 9:42 am

          Exactly why you are. I remember you saying you didn’t have friends by choice. Made me feel a little more normal. πŸ™‚

          Reply
          • Cat says

            November 23, 2016 at 9:50 am

            πŸ™‚

            Reply
    • Cat says

      November 23, 2016 at 9:21 am

      I didn’t understand that attack, either. If a post is too long, or written without breaks, making it difficult to read, I siimply scroll past it, and move on to the next.

      I generally do the same with insults. Especially if the person doesn’t know me. All it does is tell me who to watch out for. And “killing them with kindness” works wonders. At the least, it confuses and frustrates them.

      I saw a quote once. And have used it often: “Your opinion of me is none of my business.”

      I, for one, will not change because someone calls me a name. It’s more of a reflection of them than of me.

      Reply
      • Sam says

        November 23, 2016 at 2:59 pm

        All that bullshit up there pissed me off and nearly ran me off for good. Anyone not “getting” the mean girl comments is thick as hell. Newsflash: it’s YOU. I’ve been noticing it, too, and haven’t even been here all that long. WTF is with the commenters that feel like the end up sort of owning a place like this, telling people how to visit an open forum? Where do you get off? Even when directly and clearly confronted, even by the actual owner of this site, some of you STILL don’t get it. Utterly mystifying. WTF. Oh god, and the butt-kissing. It’s nauseating. Lighten up, you old broads. Jesus. You’re sucking the fun out of it, for fuck’s sake. Ugh.

        And I didn’t even get to the shittness around TT’s bad day, it was just this that made me run screaming from here. Terrible. And sorry you went through it, Tamara.

        I’ll take my seat in the WLS ranters section now.

        Reply
        • Cheryl B. says

          November 23, 2016 at 3:08 pm

          For me, and sadly I’m hoping for Tamara also, best thing that could have happened. I’m seeing what I began for, and don’t see the reason I left. Took a week, but may just be worth it.

          Reply
          • cammierari says

            November 23, 2016 at 8:04 pm

            I’ll drop by a couple of times more to see what’s up.before I abandon ship. Keep hope alive.

            Reply
            • Cheryl B. says

              November 23, 2016 at 8:12 pm

              I agree. Think it’s worth it.

        • Anastasia_Beave says

          November 24, 2016 at 1:17 pm

          Seriously, Sam. I just keep thinking, “This naivety cannot be real”.

          Reply

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