This is cruel and unusual punishment. It seems just plain sadistic that I have to recap two reunions on the same day. I already really, really, really hate this stupid week. It’s like this week is trying to compete with last week to see which week will be more difficult to endure. I hate all of these stupid fools.
We get to hear Shannon tell us she is over the affair. How long have we been talking about this stupid affair? When it comes to Shannon and David, I can’t decide who is the abusive one in the relationship. I suppose Shannon wins by a hair. Shannon has not spoken David’s mother since she filmed. Shannon says the worst thing she has done is smart off to her when she would come to dinner without helping with the dishes. Who does that? When your mother in law comes to dinner she should not be expected to clean the kitchen! Shannon is pissed that the other woman still buys season tickets for the USC football games that are in the same section as she is, only closer to the field. I think she thinks the woman should just never come out of her house again.
Andy, Tamra and Meghan all admit to making a sex tape.
The montages are so annoying. So very annoying.
Andy talks about Terry being an absentee father and how much Heather henpecked him about it. This seems to be an issue for Heather- that everyone thinks she is henpecking him about spending more time the kids. A viewer points out that Heather is on Evine all the time (and doing her podcast, and her new stupid podcast from her new closet) so she seems to miss a lot of time with her kids as well. Heather says she has nothing to complain about really when it comes to her life. She’s in a good place.
Brianna has arrived straight from a 14 hour overnight shift at the hospital to trash talk her mother. She says things between them are great again now that Brooks is out of the picture. Vicki and Brianna both rave about Vicki’s boyfriend Steve. Brianna talks about her lupus diagnosis. She also wants to set the record straight that she and her husband both work really hard and have their own money. She hates that people diminish her success by claiming that Vicki pays for everything.
Vicki says she has cut all ties with the KillAllCancer website and the site has been taken down. Lots of discussion about how the “charity” seemed like just a site fishing for people’s information so that you could try to sell them insurance. It really was one of Vicki’s dumber ideas.
I don’t understand why anyone thought we needed three hours of this.
Now for the main event. Kelly bashing. Kelly says that she doesn’t have a drinking problem. Then she tells the story of having to go to “AA classes” because a judge ordered her to go to get some charges dropped. The charges were the result of her getting drunk and slugging Michael “to keep him from getting in a fight” at a 4th of July party. See? No drinking problem at all.
We get a behind the scenes look at Heather losing her mind to production at the sushi dinner. Kelly said that Heather told production that they had to fire Kelly if they expect Heather to film. Heather had a full on tantrum. Heather tries to explain her tantrum by saying that the last time she was at that restaurant was the last time she saw her brother-in-law alive. Everyone in the restaurant could hear the scene they were making! Well, Heather then everyone in the restaurant heard your histrionics as well. Kelly says that after the bullying in Ireland, she no longer felt bad about calling on of them a cunt and a dumb fuck. I agree. Those terms seem to sum them up nicely.
Andy plays a montage of Tamra trashing Slade for being a dead beat dad, And Alexis for being a horrible mother, and saying that Lizzie (LIZZIE!) was a bad mom and asks why she is off limits from receiving those remarks. Then Andy moves on to talk about Tamra’s anger issues and physical violence. Kelly says her anger management classes kept her from beating Tamra’s ass.
We end with Shannon whining about Kelly fat shaming people on the Internet. Especially Shannon. Because you know, Shannon is so kind and loving on social media. These people are insane.
Next Week: WHY IS THERE A NEXT WEEK??? WHY? Next week it is Vicki versus Shannon with Shannon storming off the set when Vicki brings up David’s domestic violence arrest.