If nothing else, tonight we are supposed to finally make it to Ireland where “Meghan can explore her ancestry” or whatever. In case you missed it, I finally posted about what Vicki’s big secret about Shannon is. While I do think it will come out, it will not happened tonight. Tonight we will have big dramatic scenes where Kelly comes hard for Tamra saying, “No wonder your kid wants nothing to do with you!” which is a very low blow. But we knew she would be like this from our first video footage of her. At that time, the word was she would be coming in as Heather’s BFF which was odd and Heather denounced her in footage from that same post. This may explain why she was brought in as Vicki’s friend and not Meghan’s as Meghan also distanced herself from her. At any rate. Tamra is going to have her usual international meltdown for us tonight. And if there is a confrontation between Vicki and Shannon after a long night of Irish Pub Crawling, it will be next week that Vicki reveals her intel on Shannon. I think when that happens Vicki will end up looking worse than Shannon.
I cannot bear to recap these packing scenes. As a world traveler, I. Just. Can’t. It’s ridiculous. Brianna of course calls her mother out again. Because she never misses an opportunity to besmirch her mother. Tamra has not been drinking for a long time (with the occasional sake slip up) and is supposed to stay sober on her trip for her competition. So when she breaks her sobriety big time, shit is going to go really wrong. Back to things you should not wear on a plane, heels are the top of the list. You need to wear nice flats that can actually leave the plane with you if you have to deplane quickly and do not contribute to deep vein thrombosis. Ask Nene Leakes about that if you don’t believe me. Mehan has just started to get morning sickness. This should be interesting. For promotional reasons, the ladies are flying Ethiopian Air lines. I did not even know Ethiopia had an airline. I did once almost board a flight to Dubai or some Middle Eastern place I had always wanted to go to as a result of a last minute gate change in Romania. I still sort of wish I had just boarded the flight. Ah they got first class. I would fly Ethiopian Air too if I got their first class treatment.
I’m already completely mesmerized by Ireland. For some reason you can practically go to Ireland for free from Atlanta with cheap nice hotels and a rental car (that I would be terrified to drive) to get you between three cities before heading home. I may have to do that once I renew my passport. I must say I dread a new passport picture so much, but have friends in Costa Rica, so I really must bite the bullet soon.
Apparently they were well accommodated in first class because the ladies are all refreshed and in great mood once they touch down in Dublin. Note to future me: They stayed at Powerscourt Hotel. Someone recently went off on someone else in comments her for making them go to all the trouble by sharing info on how to buy a Amish quilt in Lancaster, PA because they didn’t know they were “just going there to see ‘fake Amish’ reality people. Well I have been to several place including Paris because of something I saw on reality TV. So please include me in that bunch. While filming was long over, I often see things on TV and then dash off to that place. Maybe I’m weird. Fine, I’m weird. And I need to renew my passport again.
Vicki’s boyfriend sent flowers to the hotel. VERY CLASSY.
Kelly insults the guy who takes her to the room. But he is the cutest thing ever. It’s pouring rain and she has managed to get herself into the extra bedroom in the presidential suite for Meghan (because we are to believe she planned the trip due to her maternal need to explore her heritage). Can’t blame Kelly for that.
I am so going to this hotel.
Sidenote: Sorry for the lack of Million Dollar Listing Recaps. I had someone in mind who agreed and other offers I since turned down and … well I will get it together and do them myself if need be. #BloggerProblems
I am so far behind on this recap. Too many personal interjections.
Vicki gets Tamra drunk. Tamra drags Vicki on the fun bus. Heather sucks at getting on the fun bus. Shannon is already too far onto the fun bus at stop one at the pub crawl.
Meghan is not on the pub crawl. She is doing her genealogy thing which I will not bother to recap further. Because who cares?
Did I mention Shannon is dressed like a leprechaun? And she is already pissy toward Kelly. Kelly thinks the whole you have something on your shirt and then flipping someone on the nose when they look down thing is funny. It’s not. It’s juvenile. I’m over Kelly after this incident. I’ve been the worst waitress ever in too many places for that. We have our first WHOO HOO By Vicki.
It’s now 2:34 pm according to production and everyone is shitfaced. This will not end well. Shannon and Kelly drunk bond. I probably should have eaten before happy hour myself. No one is appreciating Kelly nose flicking everyone including Vicki. Tamra tells Kelly to knock it off as she goes to the bathroom and an altercation begins. Over Kelly’s stupid nose flicking of everyone. Basically, Kelly is drunk and obnoxious. Shannon actually tries to help Kelly out. Kelly is way out of line. Kelly says that Jewish people should be able to take a joke to Heather. Heather calls Kelly racist. Is Jewish a race? Can we please learn the difference between racists and bigots?
Tamra says that Kelly had her agent look into how much Heather owes on her lot… oh here we go… Kelly says that she knows they took out a loan on their lot. One their walk to the next pub, where Heather makes them veer into a store with no cameras, Kelly says, “Know wonder her daughter doesn’t talk to her!” to Shannon, who stirs the pot by repeating it once they are inside the store with no cameras to Tamra. Great idea drunk Shannon! There is a huge off camera fight.
The next on camera scene is Shannon apologizing for telling her what Kelly said and hyperventilating in the back of the van. I know you guys don’t believe the Tamra meltdown was real, but I do, she was drunk and this is a deep issue for her. It’s not a joke, nor is it funny regardless of your feelings for Tamra. Tamra and Shannon are alone in the van, drunk. This is a real scene.
Shannon goes out to tell Kelly that was a bitch move. Vicki comes in to comfort Tamra. I feel kind of bad for saying Tamra always has a dramatic meltdown on these trips, because even though she does, I feel this one is genuine. I do feel badly for her. That was a low blow that is way across the line.
Heather is pissed because they were asked to leave the store they were shopping in and Heather has never been asked to leave anywhere. Again, if I were in Heather’s lofty place, I’d be pissed and embarrassed as well. Kelly thinks that she is being ostracized by “the mean girls.” No Kelly, you went in for an VERY low blow on Tamra, who I can’t fucking believe I am defending here. You were the cunt. Tamra did NOTHING for a change. Everyone is humiliated that they were asked to leave a department store in Dublin for their disturbance of other shoppers. Except Kelly.
They go back to the hotel, because the rest of the pub crawl seemed like a really bad idea, and Kelly who is in the presidential suite with Meghan stumbles in to tell her her warped version of events. Meanwhile, Tamra has tried to support Kelly and apologizes to the other ladies for defending her.
Sidenote: I never thought I would say this, but I really like Meghan this season.Meghan does stupidly try to get Kelly to go to dinner. But Kelly keeps her drunk, mean ass home. I really think she is one and done this season.
Kelly calls her husband for support. I think their marital situation is vastly over exaggerated. Michael is her person.
At dinner the ladies go to a cute pub. Called Johnnie Foxes, which I will include on my itinerary. I will try not to be excited if Colin is my server. The bitches all have ridiculous demands for their food. I hate them all for that. But then they all have a great time including Vicki who was all up on the waiter dancing. He was 12 so her boyfriend probably won’t care, but if Steve had done that, she’d probably have an issue with it. Was it harmless? Sure. But still. Then there is some guy doing some kind of river dance and Vicki screams out NICE ASS! Oh Vicki. I love you girl but you are on camera. Now me traveling alone? I may or may not be so obnoxious. Then, as Meghan says, some sort of Irish miracle occurs when Vicki and Shannon both end up on stage dancing with two Irish dancers.
Next week: Shannon’s shit stirring continues as she makes sure that Kelly gets drunk.
Side note: I’m not sure I have a WWHL with Vicki in me tonight. If not, It will be up tomorrow.