Today I was sent a bunch of court documents regarding Dolores’s husband Frank. I’m too groggy to read it all but apparently he was in some trouble as a real estate lawyer. And some previous criminal charges that had no jail time involved. I am going to speed through this recap because I want to watch the debates live and I also am in the middle of a narcoleptic period again.
Dolores is still trying to talk Siggy off the ledge. Siggy is worried that Jac is mad at her. This entire first scene with the granite being installed is edited between at least two filming shoots. Note the disappearing electronic thingy under the cabinet by Dolores. It’s not there at the end of the scene. Clearly, they had to go back and make them say different things.
Siggy and Delores head over to Jac’s to find out if she is mad at them. She’s not. Jac says she is done with Melissa and Teresa. Siggy makes everything about her. Siggy thinks she should not go to the fashion show. Fashion shows? It seems like the new girls are going to be on team Jac. Except for Dolores maybe. I think she will be neutral.
Joe Gorga comes over for lunch with Teresa. Juicy is out visiting one of his girlfriends. Out of the blue Teresa gives her whole I didn’t do anything wrong speech about her 41 felonies that she committed. Sure she did them, just not on purpose. She accidently told all of those banks she was a real estate agent, and an interior designer and all of her other made up jobs. She accidently falsified W-2 forms when she had no job at all. It was all unintentional. Teresa doesn’t know how “she is going to do garbage.” Joe says he’ll come take it out for her. Really?
Siggy goes to coffee with Melissa. Siggy basically calls Melissa self-absorbed and phony and says that she can’t go to the Envy fashion show with her. And she is not going to the Posche show either. Melissa is pissed. Siggy’s confessionals are not based in any reality. She is so confused about RHONJ history she just needs to stop talking. Somehow, Melissa and Siggy end on a good note. Because they are both phony and self-absorbed.
Dolores goes shopping with her mom. They talk about how Teresa is not divorcing Joe. They talk about how Italian women are treated in their old school marriages.
It’s time for the dreaded Posche Fashion show. Jac. Dolores and Kim D are having a chat. Kim D. says Teresa needs to divorce Joe or else he will be entitled to half of everything she has. Then she asks if Teresa is delusional or if she knows about Joe’s girls on the side. Jac basically says that Teresa and Joe’s relationship works for them. Dolores doesn’t want to know the details. There was no drama at Posche this year so we had to relive a montage of previous brawls.
Melissa and Teresa join Dolores and Siggy for lunch. Siggy has decided that she will come to the Envy fashion show. Teresa starts trashing Jac and Dolores and Siggy shut it down. They talk about Joe going to prison.
Jac and Chris have a launch party for their popcorn line. They announce that Ashlee is pregnant. Siggy makes it all about her. Everyone there except Melissa and Tre including Kathy and Rosie.
Joe is having a going away party and he invited Chris and Jac and the kids. Jac is not going but Chris is. Dolores tells Chris he shouldn’t go either. Chris says his plan was to just pop in and out. Dolores has no business butting into Chris and Joe’s friendship. I think she is giving him terrible advice.
Sidenote: I think these #GucciGuilty commercials are ridiculously bad.
Teresa and Dolores go to church. There they reminisce about how their lives didn’t work out the way they had planned. Teresa still hasn’t learned how to cross herself.
I’m going to lie down and probably fall asleep during the debate now.