Okay Below Deck, I saved you for a palate cleanser after doing my patriotic duty of watching the Vice Presidential Debates. Please don’t let me down. I need a nice fun easy show to recap, I am weary, mentally and physically today. Let’s just have some fun, shall we?
Hopefully we can send cry baby Sierra home tonight. Ben literally treated her better than he has ever treated anyone in the kitchen and she buckled under the pressure. All she had to do was make a fucking salad. I can’t with her. Oh, I forgot the hirsute dude and the freaks with a million dietary restrictions were still on the boat. Nico and Kate are both advocating for Ben and Kelly to coddle Sierra some more to stick around. Why? She should have been fired for missing her flight.
Oh no, Lauren has a crush on Nico and she thinks it is mutual. But Nico and Kelly and are both vying for Emily. Kate is apparently trying to revamp her image after being a cunt to all the stews since she started the show. Of course she starts this with a stew that literally puts the paper packet in the captain’s coffee, can’t iron and cries when she has to make a salad.
I will have to fast forward through the manscaping of the bears. One of the old men asks Emily if they get to see her “V”? Then the same guys makes a comment to Kate. They really need to put a stop to this. At least they left a $20K tip. Everyone got two thousand dollars. Did you get yours, Sierra? You basically made a two thousand dollar salad. Quit your bitching.
It’s time for some shore leave. Sadly, Lauren is about to find out she is in the friend zone. Nico is making his move on Emily before they are even on dry land. Lauren is already giving Nico the cold shoulder over hi overtures toward Emily. Ben has to explain to Nico what Lauren’s problem is. Kelly is wasting his time he could be spending vying for Emily comforting Lauren. I should point out is the prettiest girl on the boat in my opinion. These boys are idiots. Then he sends Nico out to Lauren. Kelly tells Emily that Nico has a girl. I guess he means back home, but it was quite the successful cock block. It looks like a win for Kelly. An ugly win, but a win nonetheless.
A drunk Nico, who let us know earlier that they call him “Freako” back at home tries to hit on, Sierra! He’s so drunk he is swaying in the wind. And is below deck. Then he stumbles into Emily’s bunk and tells her that he finds her so attractive. The next morning Nico oversleeps and the new deckhand is late. Nico tells Kelley that he tried making out with everyone the previous night. The stews now see Nico in a whole new light now that they have met Freako. He is quickly able to work his charms on Lauren again.
The new deck hand Kyle shows up an hour late. He has a very thick British accent that says, “fishmonger.” NTTAWWT. I like fish. I don’t think his accent is hard to understand at all. He trims up his beard as soon as the Captain tells him to. I just hope his being late to the boat is something the captain can let slide. I mean it’s not like he missed his flight and showed up the next day. He did fly in that morning. He’s fitting in well with the crew. And he is going to pay attention to Sierra so that will do wonders for her.
The new guests are easy. A blended family that is old enough for all the kids to drink. Which is good, because they seem to quite enjoy drinking.
Everything is going swimmingly, and then Kyle dislocates his shoulder.
Next Week: It looks like Kyle lives. But the young women drinking like fishes lives are in danger. It looks like one of them falls off a water toy.