Tom and Lillian in Montego Bay Jamaica
Tom and Lillian have consummated their marriage. They both felt like their first time was perfect and special.
These two go for a swim in the ocean. Tom loves Lillian in a bikini. They do a lot of getting to know you type conversations. They are so over the moon about each other, the first bump is going to be brutal for both of them.
Next, they go play in a small waterfall. Everything is going perfectly. And this is starting to feel like too much too soon to me.
Homework (Pillow Talk ): It’s unclear if this is their homework discussion or just their regular talks because they ask each other probing questions all the time. But in the course of conversation, Tom says that he is a minimalist in every way. She doesn’t seem to understand the concept. He says well a lot of people want a lot of things that they think will make them happy, like a really super nice car. Lilly says, “You know I drive a nice car…” She tells us in confessional that he knows what she drives because he saw it at brunch so he was putting her in that category and it’s not fair. She explains that it is important for her profession to have a nice car to drive her clients around. Tom is shocked that she is offended as that was not his intention. He says that he thinks she misinterpreted what he said and asks to try again to explain himself. He does and she is completely over it in seconds.
Nick and Sonia in Las Terrenas, Dominican Republic
These two are still awkward and silly. They have not consummated their marriage, but Sonia is thinking about it a lot. She wants to firmly establish their connection first.
They go paddle boarding despite Sonia being a bit fearful of the water. Nick is a lot hotter in more casual clothes. Sonia was a bit better at the paddle boarding. This impressed Nick. They take a walk on the beach together in their sandals that say “just married” on the soles. It’s kind of adorable. Later they go horseback riding to a waterfall. It’s way prettier than the one we saw in Jamaica. Was that their first kiss since the wedding? So far so good with these two. Then they had a romantic dinner at the beach with champagne and great conversation. These two are very happy. They are cute.
Homework (Pillow Talk ): The assignment was going well until Nick says something like, “I like where we are at this point, it is just day five and there is no need to rush anything.” Lillian thinks that him even saying the words “no need to rush things” means he thinks she is rushing him. Lillian needs constant reassurance that things are okay, and they are and Nick would tell her that if he knew that is what she needed. But Nick is now frustrated. Lillian said that was a weird thing to say. Weird isn’t a good word to use with Nick, so now he is confused and irritated. He ends the homework assignment in frustration. Sonja is butthurt and doesn’t want to be around him. Later they make up and all is forgiven. But Nick took the blame over a misunderstanding. I’m not sure if that is a good or a bad thing.
Derek and Heather in San Juan, Puerto Rico
Derek is way more positive and into the relationship than Heather. Heather is nit picking him to death and it is only day two. Just get out now, Derek. This will not end well.
Alas they go for a bike ride together. At least they each have their own bike. I almost don’t want to watch this. Heather takes off and leaves him and rides in a different lane. You can see that the cops are trailing them keeping the traffic off of them. Derek asks if they are trying to race. Heather says no, this is just how she rides. That is how you ride alone Heather, that is not how you ride with your man. Derek wants her to slow down and enjoy the scenery. The both come away from the bike ride unhappy. Heather says at this point she doesn’t know what to do. Hint: Lighten the fuck up! Slow your ass down! Be respectful toward your husband! Stop being so damn critical! That’s just a start.
Heather walks Derek out to the beach to tell him all the things he is doing wrong. She starts in on the smoking. It’s still not clear if it is pot or cigarettes. Okay, it’s pot. He says she has been drinking every day since the met. Derek walks off pissed before she can get to the rest of her laundry list.
Derek does a video cam confessional where you can tell he is hurt, but still willing to try. Heather mellows a bit with some time apart. They come back together with cooler heads. Heather has been to some couples counseling before or watched a lot of Dr. Phil because she responses to Derek’s heartfelt comments about being willing to make changes for his new marriage to work, by reflecting what she heard back to him. Only she didn’t seem to hear the part where he said he would be willing to change things and only reflected back the part about how conflict is to be expected at this point. Then she said I can’t believe you would think it was a good idea to smoke pot everyday. (the edited out the pot part). Now he is pissed again. He extended the olive branch and she went right back to bitching. So he told her that she can’t get off her high horse and stop judging him every minute. Which is the whole problem here. He says the most irritating part is that he gave her two hours to think and she is still saying the same thing, which means she is not interested in compromise. She responds with , “Well what have you done everyday for the past five days? I didn’t think I was going to get matched with this!” He says, “I didn’t think I was going to get matched with an alcoholic!”
I swear to God this woman just repeats herself over and over and over like a damn broken record. Maybe she hasn’t been to counseling and Lord knows Dr. Phil would have told her that she’d catch more flies with honey. Why not consider asking him to not smoke as much rather than beat him over the head about hit repeatedly?
Homework (Pillow Talk ): Um noe. These two didn’t get that far. They were too focused on trying not to kill each other.