The most exciting things about Vanderpump Rules happened on the show last night, and even more in the after show. Xanadude covered the show in this post and don’t miss his aftershow recap in comments. It was good, James, Lala and Lauren were all on giving different versions of events.
I am under the weather and taking care of Banjo who is on about 6 different drugs for his skin allergy thing he is sufferinf with so I’m just going to focus on the Kristen stuff. We are all much better than yesterday so thanks for the sweet comments. I do not know how parents deal with sick kids. I was blubbering the entire hour at the vet as he was all shaky and I feel totally responsible for his condition. Anyway, back to the show.
My first thought on seeing Kristen is that she is too skinny. Kristen says that James is weird and she was not aware of his biting fetish. She feels like he has changed into someone else since they spilt up. Andy is wondering where Anthony the bartender has been hiding. It’s a rare dude that has escaped Andy’s advances apparently. Watch out Anthony, Andy is coming for you? He wants to know if Kristen as hooked up with him. She implies that something might have gone on many years ago. She says he is one of the OGs of SUR from eight years ago. You know there is a lot of intermingling in restaurants in general at SUR it seems to be sort of the new person initiation for everyone to screw the new person. So I’m gonna go with yes, she hooked up with him briefly. Andy gleans the same from her story by saying, “Oh yes, so you did!” and Kristen doesn’t correct him.
Andy points out that Stassi in there with Kristen sitting in the audience.
Andy plays a scene from next week when James is screaming at Kristen again telling her she will never get married. Kristen responds by saying something about Aleks. A caller asks about Aleks and we discover that Aleks is the douche from Below Deck’s first season. This shows us that Aleks has a type, (crazy) Kristen and Rocky! And that Kristen have a type, douchebags. Then Kristen informs us that she can’t say if she is dating Aleks because it plays out on the show but that we will see Aleks on Vanderpump Rules this season. I don’t think they were much of a thing because Kristen spent the summer with THIS GUY.
When Andy asks what the hell Kristin saw in James, she said he was basically a rebound from Tom and that maybe her made her want to be skinnier. This alarms me because we all know how the boys (allegedly) “get skinnier.” Be careful, Kristen! Kristen says she is dating now and has a big smile on her face.
I just realized that the other guest is Howard Sterns wife, Beth. She’s a crazy cat lady. But even so she seems way to sane for Howard.
A caller asks Kristen what is going on with her face. I gave y’all that story here but it was in the middle of all the Brooks and Shannon drama and it sort of got over looked. The caller asks if she got too many fillers.
Kristen says, ” So super long story… I sort of told it on the after show last week. I got into an accident in October, and I have three fractures to my face. So the first week of November, I had reconstructive surgery, so now I’m a bionic woman and I have three titanium plates, so I’m very swollen still all throughout here. The big bummer, speaking of fillers, was that I actually had just gotten fillers like two weeks before that! What a waste!”
The right side of her face is still really swollen and it’s been a few weeks since surgery.
Andy asks what kind of accident and she says, “I tripped and fell getting out of an Uber and smacked my face on the bumper. As I said before, it takes a lot more than a fall she’s describing to break your orbital bone.
Kristen says she believes that James used her to be on Vanderpump Rules and that she and Jax are in a good place. Everyone always ends up liking Jax no matter what he does.
Poll Question was “Who would you rather,James or Jax ? Jax won by 75%. Apparently, sewing your vagina closed was not a choice.