I can hardly wait to go bowling with our national treasure Juliet on tonight’s Ladies of London. I swear this show coming on right after Real Housewives of Orange County is just too much. Juilet wants to have a bowling party with burgers, drinks and wigs. Because, Juliet.
Marissa meets Annabelle for a chat. Annabelle gives Marissa some feedback on the ballcaps she wants to sell in her hot dog shop. And then they talk about Juliet’s habit of tossing aside all of her friends to placate Caroline.
Caroline S. is preparing to pare down her business substantially. She is still pretending there is going to be a next year. There is a big board meeting about to happen. After the meeting Caroline and one of her advisors get into the car and it’s clear the meeting was a disaster. He assistant calls to ask, “Are We Fired?” And the answer is a resounding yes. Caroline would like to be concerned about this but Michael Sams and his boyfriend Vito are about to arrive for a stay at her house so she simply must take them out. In case you are not a football fan, Michael Sams is the first NFL player to come out as gay while still playing for the major leagues. She eventually takes them on a Duck Tour. That looked like fun.
Annabelle is still working on her children’s book. She has signed a deal. I love the illustrations that the graffiti artist did for her. And we have the requisite Alexander McQueen montage for no reason at all.
Julie, Annabelle and Caroline Fleming head off to Beaulieu Estate which is run by Julie’s husband’s cousin or something. That estate is stunningly beautiful and apparently they are able to keep up with the place financially. The plan is to seek advice from them on how to keep Mapperton from going under. The cousin basically just gives them a brief tour, Caroline Fleming says what I have been saying but she uses words like “high tea in the orangerie” and say sell fucking sandwiches. Because, Earl of Sandwich. For some reason, these three seem to want to help Juliet not be such a bitch. Well, mainly Caroline Fleming. The other two are skeptical.
So Juliet stops by Caroline Fleming’s to be Eliza Doolitte to Caroline’s Professor Higgins. First lesson? Making homemade pesto. Caroline says she uses coconut oil as a moisturizer. I thought I was the only one who did that. Caroline is a cougar who is dating a 30 year old. She is also full of sexual innuendo.
It’s time to bowl! Juliet has ordered everyone bowling outfits and neon wigs. Annabelle wisely managed to beg off. Due to my facial recognition skills. I have no idea who anyone is with their wigs on. Everyone has a nickname on their shirts and Carloline F’s is “Cougar.” Marissa said something about “Lock up your children!” and then later Marissa says that she likes small children. Fleming is BEYOND pissed at Marissa. So we can expect a throw down next week.
Juliet and Julie try to talk out their differences and start over. We’ll see how long this lasts.
Next Week: Pheasant hunting and cougar baiting.