Dear God it never ends on a Monday night. It’s time for Ladies of London. The only thing that makes it all worthwhile is Juliet Angus will probably jump up and down at me on Twitter again for pointing out she is the poster child for the “ugly American.” Clearly, marrying someone with money doesn’t make you anymore civilized.
Let’s get on with the show as I am exhausted already.
Carolin shows up at Marissa’s house an Marisss has some sort of…machine that is illegal in the US for increasing blood flow? WTF? It sounds like a tens unit. Don’t ask me how I know about those. Anyway, brilliantly shocks the shit out of Caroline.
Wait, THERE IS A FUCKING FLASHBACK OF TWO SECONDS OF THE DUELING THANKSGIVINGS? SERIOULSY? All I wanted to see tonight was Marissa’s fucking Thanksgiving. What is wrong with this idiotic British production team? HOW DO YOU SKIP OVER THE DUELING FUCKING THANKSGIVINGS. I just want to stop watching now.
Great now we have Marissa’s Christmas sing-a-long charity thing. I doubt we will see that either. Let’s just have endless hours of women bitching instead. Sadly, Marissa cannot figure out how to electrocute Caroline.
Annabelle
Oh what the bloody fuck is this shit? We’re suddenly dropped into a fucking “art show” that consists of a whole room of electrical wires. Seriously? NOE.
Anabelle starts her name dropping as if anyone of sound mind could be impressed with this shit. The things rich people think is art never ceased to amaze me. Was that Marissa who wisely bailed for another engagement? Why is Julie sucking up to Annabelle?
The Two Carolines
The two Carlines go shopping for a Christmas party. There seems to be an underlying current of rivalry there. Caroline Fleming has a title. I think. Caroline Stanbury seems jealous. Caroline Fleming may be even more full of herself than Caroline Stanbury if that is possible.
Julie who has a British title is very excited to be invited to Caroline Fleming’s Christmas party. Julie is miles above the Carolines in my book. Maybe it is because her title includes the word ‘sandwich” and I love sandwiches. And single people really don’t bother to buy bread because most of the loaf gets tossed. I like sandwiches. And Julie.
Oh lord, again with the Alexander McQueen.
Dear God, Caroline Fleming’s house is to die for. Well except for the skull painting, which I’m sure cost more than I make in ten years but is still quite ungodly. Anyway, it is a Scandinavian Christmas party as Fleming’s house and she seems to be a fantastic hostess. I love Flemings’ dress. But as a fat chick, I could wear it and she should have picked one that shows off her awesome figure. It seems Marissa is not coming which makes me care even less about this party. I love Julie’s dress, but there was something going on with her nipples. Black strapless maybe? Stanbury probably winds the best dress award. Fleming has Cheetos for the Americans. Really? Fleming has no “help”? She really is the Danish Martha Stewart.
After all of Fleming’s hard work, Juliet is suddenly able to eat goose at Fleming’s house even though she refused to eat meat all last season. That is how much she want the Barefoot Baroness to like her. Yet somehow she thinks Marissa who had other plans is the social climber? I kind of love Fleming. She has announced that everything that flies you can eat with your fingers. Juliet still doesn’t know which way the tines go in your mouth when eating. Juliet discovers that Marissa is not inviting her to her Christmas carol shindig. Juliet can’t figure out why. Because, dumb.
Gay or European? A gay guy brought a guy named Duncan who everyone assumed was on a date (NTTAWWT) and Duncan seems to be quite into the barefoot Baroness. This causes much chatter at the table as he helps Fleming clean up. OH THE SCANDAL! Stanbury doesn’t eat fruit and Fleming tries to force her. Fleming throws everyone out of the dinner party because she is ready for her private time even though they are still eating dessert. I sort of get that, but I would never actually do it.
I adore all things Christmas. So I love this. But I am still pissed I didn’t get to see Thanksgiving at Bumpkin.
Finally Marissa. I want to fire the stylist that let her do her talking heads with that flat ass hair. Maybe it is my southern, BIG HAIR IS THE BEST HAIR roots, but she looks so much better in the actual scenes. I haven’t been to London since I was ten so I don’t know if the Royal Albert Hall is a big deal or what. I am just loving the carols played as we find the new location for these ladies to get ratchet. Dear God. The Royal Albert Hall is amazeballs I have been skipping London on my international travels because frankly, as a child I was pissed that there was no circus at Piccadilly Circus and I’ve never recovered from that childhood trauma. And while I quite enjoyed the Beefeaters and the castles and stuff, it just seems mean for a kid to expect a circus and get… I don’t even know what. Another round about? My memory is foggy but there is nothing exciting for a child at “Piccadilly Circus ” and this is yet another reason why I am in therapy. Or was before Obama made me spend $500 a month for REALLY, REALLY shitty health insurance.
Annabelle really is a classist cuntbag. I was TRYING to like her.
I am so over this recap, SIDENOTE: I’m going to recap WWHL tomorrow. I just can’t.
The excluded Juliet is out with her husband and feeling left out. One of her kids calls and he immediately lets them sleep in their bed and says he will sleep in the kid’s room. Hmmmm maybe the part of last week’s recap where I said her husband never being home would be a marital problem hit home. I want all couples to be happy, but it seems that perhaps Juliet will be the Shannon of this franchise.
Marissa’s holiday event is HUGE! Did that one dude just mention Cheesecake Factory? Do they have those in London? That makes me sad. I get British food is not the most favored of all cuisines, but Cheesecake Factory? I hate when American chains are in other countries. I used to pee in a McDonald’s in Romania a lot and that was the most I wanted to do there.
I don’t care to recap this Marissa, Juliet argument. Marissa wins. End of story.
Last week, Stanbury was telling us her business was doing great. This week they show problems. This is December and in February things go completely belly up. While Caroline goes on a ski trip, her employees don’t even know if they have jobs.
Marissa an Juliet meet. Marissa is nice but Juliet refuses to kiss or hug her. Juliet wants a truce for the new year. Juliet is a lying liar who lies. Juliet is the worst friend ever. It seems that Juliet is taking out her marital problems on Marissa. Marissa is trying to set boundaries. Juliet has on a gorgeous sweater. But the two basically break up.
Next Week: Marissa wants to open her own restaurant. We skip yet another month to New Years Eve. Juliet’s plight becomes worse. Perhaps she should have been nice to Marissa?
Why does Juliet INSIST on wearing other that don’t match? At all, on any level? No, Juliet, just NO.
*clothes not ‘other’. Damn you iPhone for making me have to re enter my email address and name tonight for the sixth time.
I am clearly braindamaged as I continue to leave the last letter off words when recapping. WTF? Am I getting the dementia already?
I would be a poor judge as I have been demented all my life.
What’s weird is that she is a Celebrity Stylist, yet she always seems to show up in a mismatched hodgepodge of layers. I don’t get it either.
If she’s a stylist, why don’t any of the women, who seem to go to parties all the time, ever consult with Juliet? You’d think that Bravo would throw her a bone by forcing the 2 Carolines to take her with them when they were shopping for party frocks.
Juliet is a celebrity stylist? Fml
Ok, I’ve decided to become a celebrity accountant. Clearly no expertise in any field is required to become a Celebrity ‘stylist/accountant/social climber/et al’ these days.
forgetting for a moment Anabelle’s obssession with letting everyone know she was Alexander McQueen’s “muse” or whatever, that nobody really cares…I think it’s hilarious how Ramona, Luann and I don’t know how many housewives have fought over women wearing clothes from “their” designer and these bitches are sharing Alexander McQueen gowns!!! For me this show is all about looking at these women’s houses and crazy lifestyles. I don’t care if Juliet and Marissa don’t get along, and frankly all of them seem to be social climbers…except Caroline Fleming, I kind of loved her. I liked that she cooked and served everything herself, I loved how she just went for that bone like nobody’s business, and then just kicked everyone out and didn’t give a flying rat’s ass. The whole thing was just funny and refreshing.
Kind of like Rachel Zoe? Why that woman insists on dressing “derelicte” I will never understand. She looks like a fucking hobo.
If Juliet were my stylist, she’d be FIIIIIIYURD!
TT, don’t worry about the letters/words/caps/whatevers, the computer/tablet/phone/whatever makes the best of us look brain-damaged.
I’ve been trying to figure out why Marissa and Julie, the nicest and most acclimated of the Americans, get sneers and short shrift from the Brits. Maybe they don’t like American women succeeding on their turf and marrying their men. Juliet, on the other hand, is probably tolerated because she lives down to their image of Americans as bad mannered barbarians.
Juliet belongs on RHOOC.
I truly could see Juliet and Tamra as born again Christian besites.
‘Thanksgiving is about FAMBLY, which is why I would like to host it at your place Caroline – the person who despises American tradition and who is in no way related to me’.
The one caveat is no RHOOC lady would have that ugly hair or wear that hideous baby shit green sweater either.
She also seems like she’d be a good substitute for a Brandi or Meghan. Every franchise needs a good shit stirrer. So here comes Juliet! I really don’t like her. Out of all the ladies.
I’m still trying to get my bearings and figure out who’s who. No time to watch the show and I don’t remember much from last season other than Annabel’s injury and Caroline is a good talker.
I’m binge watching The Walking Dead and watch housewives. The juxtaposition is ….pick a word because I can’t. TWD folk deal with survival/spiritual i.e. what makes a person human, whilst the housewives contrive drama because they have nothing but superficiality to confront. I enjoy both because TWD causes me to wonder how I’d deal with those situations and the housewives cause me to escape those deep questions. I’m thinking most people live in between. Oh, and those Ladies of London? They might be rich and have titles, but they have the WORST HAIR on the planet!! It must be the fog. Limp hair to the max.
I had the same thought about the hair. Scraggly, limp, and the tackiest shades of blond. Maybe it does have to do with so much rain. Or, the hair has to be flat for all the hats they wear. But couldn’t the stylists at least brush the hair in the back?? On a side not — just love the Danish Caroline. She’s wacky, eats goose with her fingers, and does her own cooking for a dinner party.
Impossible to have nice hair in the uk. Maybe indoors, but leave the house once and it’s gone. Sometimes there’s no point in trying.
That’s so funny. I like to imagine these entitled women with little to no survival skills in a zombie apocalypse. In fact, I’d watch a show like that. My money’s on Tamra to survive because she’d be the first to shrug off any semblance of civility and take care of number one. 🙂
Caroline S would be the first one to send off her minions/staff to get everything she needs lol
“What the bloody fuck is this shit?” – beyond priceless. I though I was the only one who can string words together like that. Way to go, Tamara. Hysterical from beginning to end.
Soo right TT. Brit editing is hopelessly hooked on the home tours, which I do appreciate the first 10 times. They don’t cover the scene of the divorce, the dueling turkey dinners, instead endlessly repeat trips to the Earl’s 357th in-line-to-the-throne estate and Caroline Fleming’s innccreeeddibbllyy impressive royal family.
Maybe they think, as stupid Americans, we need reminding we’re to be suitably awed. Or Julie needed a brush up on where her children weren’t christened. We never saw the family traditions, the party details or the food they pretended to shop for at the Amercan grocer. Those cheeky monkies don’t know what they’re doing on the bloody island, my British grandmother would say, done and dusted.
I stil appreciate the home tours and travelogue scenes. It’s my vicarious vacation while I make mental notes of where I want to visit when I go there.
I really wanted to see the sterile Thanksgiving at Caroline’s house that Juliet insisted on vs Marissa’s homey Thanksgiving at the restaurant. Juliet is just the worst. Kind of loving the Baroness & her obnoxious laugh though…
Caroline F. Reminds me of one of those old, eccentric British women you read about in books and see in movies. Padding around barefoot in a ball gown, eating with her hands, and throwing guests out before they’re finished with desert. And that HONK! My God!
She’s a kook!
Exactly. And didn’t Juliet barely escape last season without losing all her friends? She isn’t trying hard enough to change perceptions this year. Her husband is the nicest of the bunch, but is that because he’s rarely in the country? In fact, none of their partners appear to live at home, save Marissa’s restaurateur hours husband. How will they ever see each other when she opens her own place?
Maybe that’s the trick for these highly strung girls. Is it common for such powerful, happy, women of the world to battle for attention with redundant arguments over who gets to throw the party and childish refusals to eat venison, goose and fruit? Thank goodness, by the looks of previews, storylines finally get 3-dimensional & fur will fly on many fronts. Viscountess Lady Julie and Baroness Caroline F., are my favorites for keeping it real, go figure.
All I can think of with Caroline’s bray is “Dominic the Christmas donkey “.
What Is up with that AWFUL, stomach turning, I thought something was wrong with my TV’s speakers, laugh of Caroline’s????.. I felt embarrassed for her… Someone has had to mention to her that her laugh is the most awful thing anyone’s ever heard!!! you would think her parents would have tried to correct it if she truly is high society
Juliet may be whiney and exhausting to be friends with but she & Marissa have their skin makeup perfect. At least on my tv they are all glowy and creamy complected. Caroline leans a bit heavily on the contouring sometimes. And the Baroness laugh-snort is amusing.
That guy Duncan was on Joan River’s reality show “Joan Knows Best” with her daughter Melissa. Duncan and Melissa dated. I’m not sure if it was for real or a story line for the show.
Oh, I remember that! Same Duncan!
I am so in love with the baroness with that laugh of hers coupled with her politely telling her guests to leave in ten minutes. A girl gotta have her vitamin D. LMFAO.
I think that laugh might get grating after a while but more power to her for not changing it to be all…proper.
I really like her as well. I liked that she cooked and served everything herself. Loved her dog on Caroline that hey…it’s a Monday night, kids have school, and my day starts 3 hours earlier than hers since she apparently is raising her own children
She just seems like a great, genuine gal to be around. I grew up around ‘old money’ and they were very much like that..very unpretentious and genuine. It was the new money folks that were all pretentious and look at me …look at me. She’s old money and title…definite class but still still fun and not stuffy.
..dig on Caroline but I suppose ‘dog’ works too.
Last season it seemed like I didn’t like Juliet at first. Then she became an underdog and I began to like her. By the end of season she was one of my fave. I wonder if this season it will be the same?
I feel sorry for Juliet. She’s a mess and seems so lonely.
Juliet and Marissa are both try too hard. Juliet is mad because Marissa’s try hard is working better than hers. when you think about it, these ladies are both alike- Juliet is jealous because marissa by marrying the brit gets an automatic IN into brit society- esp since he is the hottest restauranter/club owner in London. everyone is kissing her ass trying to get in. Ex: maybe Annabelle ( who I like) is friends with her. There may be a genuine friendship there now, but i doubt it started that way- Anabelle knows all the ppl to know. Thats her thing! marissa by extention of her husband is one of those ppl. Honestly if it were not for her hubby, i very much doubt that Anabelle would give marissa the time of day… and on some level she knows that. Marisa is jealous of juliet because Caroline/ Julie M, and now the Barroness have taken a liking to her. I believe the Caroline S has some family title, or at the very least carte blanche entre into the world of the aristocrats, and not by extention of her husband. Thats why she is so obsessed with throwing perfect little parties, where everything is perfect and wonderful like she is the martha stewart of London. She is trying to impress the aristos with her hosting skills, but as we see they clearly have no need of her because the they have the baroness and caroline s. to host them at wonderful parties.
I completely forgot this show had begun again (!) if it wasn’t for Tamara I swear I would have no idea what was on tv…I need to see what Annabelle is up to…
I almost felt sorry for little Juliet this episode. Mealy-mouhted Marissa gave her the heave ho and hubs is gone most of the time. Girl needs a project. I want to know the restaurant she and Gregor were dining in. Looked familiar. Anyone know?
I agree, Katherine. I felt sorry for her as well. It was the way Marissa seemed so unfazed by Juliet’s pain that bothered me. I like Marissa and have enjoyed her on the show, but she seemed a bit ice-princessy when her friend was trying to mend their broken friendship. It seemed like she was indifferent and didn’t give a shit either way.
And when Marissa suggested that Juliet wasn’t climbing the correct social ladder, I puked a little.
Pip, so true. She seemed to enjoy making her squirm, too. Is she channeling Caroline S?
I will never understand the thirst for social status. So cutthroat and phony.
But a lot of her pain is her own creation – and Marissa DID try to help with that by attempting to throw her a birthday party at Thanksgiving. (Seriously – I don’t care what class you are, it is beyond rude to accept an invitation where you are the guest of honor – and people have been invited on your behalf that otherwise would not have been invited – then decide that you didn’t like it and have someone else throw you a party at the same time. I would drop that “friend” too)
Marissa was quite the ice princess, but I think she is dunzo with Juliet, at least for the time being. I would be too, with that big adult baby constantly whining about her birthday ?
I’ve been to London twice for Christmas. It’s lovely. I enjoy the library where they keep the treasures of literature and high tea at The Browns. They have nights in the museums when you can drink wine as you tour the galleries. Give it a go Tamara! I bet you’ll enjoy it.
Hello first time poster – long time lurker!
Did anyone else think that Caroline had already got rid of most of her staff when the show was filmed? It seemed to really be pushed that EVERYONE was in the warehouse wrapping gifts.
Is Alexander fucking McQueen really Anabelle’s storyline again? Gawd, shut UP, nobody CARES. Pathetic status-seeker.
I am probably in the minority here but I love Caroline S. I am obsessed with her perfect little life, her perfect house, her perfect eyelashes and her perfect hair. I am not a Juliet fan but Marissa looked too smug telling Juliet she didn’t want to be friends with her anymore. How eighth grade of them.
I like Caroline S. as well. Kind of obsessed. LOVED it when she was telling Juliet “Don’t you dare cry.” Owns what she is at the very least! And I’m sorry, I know her face wasn’t born that way, but I love her look with the flat ironed hair & cat/smokey eyes… Girl crush?
Marissa may be annoying, but she seems genuinely nice, like she broke thru Annabelle’s wall of ice by being there when she was hurt: that’s SHOWING you’re a real friend, not just SAYING so.
I think Marissa is just into her scene and happy with her growing family (she lost that baby weight quite effectively!), whereas Juliet appears to be in the middle of a meltdown. Those are the times you lean on friends, not alienate them. I understand Marissa saying they’re friends, just not BFFs. Juliet made such a ridiculous thing out of Thanksgiving–was she under heavy sedation to get through Tgiving last year???
Juliet seems like DRAMA. Juliet is so immature and her quote “I’m friends with a Viscountess and now a Baroness!” Okay, social climber.
I like Annabelle a lot more this season. She appears to have become warmer since her terrible accident.
Caroline Fleming? Hmmmm… Wildcard? Could be really cool, could be awful. Too early to tell.
So glad Julie is full-time now and not just a “friend of”. She likes to talk about her “regular” life, but she seems sincerely excited by this new world in front of her.(and seems to enjoy the people, so far…) I had a lot of respect for her helping Annabelle’s recovery, and note that Julie and Annabelle weren’t super close when Annabelle got hurt. I don’t need to tell many people here: it’s HARD to caretake for someone no matter how much you love them, and it can be easy to let life swallow you up, so being so devoted and giving Annabelle all she did–that is the stuff that demonstrates Julie is a good person.
Damn the shade thrown TT. Funny. Great recap. Haven’t been able to watch yet but all of that fuss then no showing of Thanksgiving? ? You have got to be kidding me?? Crazy.
Oh… FYI… the Royal Albert Hall is a HUGE deal. If a singer says that they get to “perform for the Queen” I think this is the usual venue. It is the equivalent of our Carnegie Hall in prestige I believe.
Also in my favorite part of London – South Kensington.
I loved the way Baroness Caroline was calmly sailing up and down the stairs to the kitchen humming, whilst Caroline S was bleating about how hungry she was, haha. And then, even as she had all of her guests waiting, she still took the time to feed her little Dachsunds (?) a treat when checking on the goose – hilarious. From what I’ve read, she got a £400 million settlement from her ex, Rory Fleming, a few years back AND hails from Danish aristocracy – no wonder Juliet ate the goose and fawned all over her!
“bleating” lol ?
Nothing at all about the fact Caroline’s “Duncan” is the same Duncan that was dating Melissa Rivers on the reality show she had w Joan?
Is he just a camara addict – star wannabe? Ridiculous!