Sorry, I wasn’t home on Thursday night and I am quite behind on catching up. I pledge never to leave my house again. Truly. I really doubt I missed anything but I am compelled to watch it anyway. Let’s see what happened.
We begin with Bethenny ordering a Skinny Girl margarita at a bar. Is that even a possible thing? I mean do they sell that in the bars now? She’s meeting with Dorinda and they are both sick. Alcohol will kill it all. I can see Bethenny and Dorinda getting along. They give the bartender a pep talk about her financial situation getting better. I realize they are rich, but bartenders walk a way with plenty o cash at the end of the night. I’m just saying. There are plenty of cubicle dwellers who are slaving away for less. Dorinda talks about what a great waitress she was. I on the other hand was fired from every waitressing job I ever had. I made great tips, my tables loved me, but I really sucked. It was all very complicated and I kept chatting people up and getting behind. 🙂 I really tried, but I could never remember who needed a spoon and who asked for extra lemons and all that shit. I’m a terrible employee which is why I need to figure out to code my advertising tags. I’m losing money every day I don’t figure it out.
Next, the whole crew goes to a bar and there are no prospects for Luann to get laid so she wants to leave. It’s a juxtaposition of how to behave in a bar and how not to.
Next, we move to Dorinda’s weird Jewish sushi chef. Luann and Ramona’s odd toasts for John’s Dorinda. We’re actually back at the reunion again. WHY? Squabbles occurred where Dorinda seems to be lying about hanging out with the Countess all the time before the show.
Next up, a scene where the girls debate lighting a fire. It’s a log fireplace I could do this easily. However, I have a friend with a cabin in the woods and it is one of those like black stove sort of deals. There are instructions, about closing the door but not closing the door and this is why probably won’t go up when it is cold. Because complicated. I’m assuming it is either perimenopause or lots of dead brain cells from drinking, but I honestly am just overwhelmed by the simplest tasks lately. So I guess I can’t judge. Oh wait, yes I can. After lecturing everyone on how to pronounce ‘flue’ Bethenny wants to call a non-existent door man to tell her if the flue is open. Um, can she not look up the chimney?
OMG! Andy says, “At Dorinda’s apartment, the motto is, ‘Come for tea, Stay for the pathos!”” Sound familiar? I have proper tea cups all over my house. Never use them. This post is about me a lot because frankly, I am more interesting than this show. Only Dorinda drinks the tea. Dorinda got an email from her dead husband from 2007. OMG. #allergies
It seems like the found the ugliest view of NYC buildings after that. What was that?
Ramona and Sonja talk about how they didn’t support each other as much during Ramona’s divorce stuff. They hug it out.
Ramona, Luann and Kristen go to a dream analyst. I am all ready to write her off but then she describes things the same way I feel about dreams. At night I feel like all of the things of the day, the things we noticed and the things we didn’t are downloaded into our brain and categorized. I think our dreams are all a mixture of those things sort of flying past each other as our brain works it out and figures out where to store all of our fears and thoughts and feelings get jumbled up into dreams. Luann says in her dreams she is a tooth. At this point the dream lady loses me. I say Luann just needs to go to the dentist. Sonja comes in talking about breaking her tooth again. Luann was there last night when Sonja lost her tooth. My theory is confirmed. Ramona arrives. She has a tooth dream too where her teeth all fall out.
More about Ramona and her need to unpack. Please tell us she tips them big. More about how rude Ramona is to “the help.” Ramona says she always says please and thank you. Bethenny calls her out on it.
Carole meets with her editor because she is always pushing her book deadlines back. I get deadlines are hard. She really does need to go to writers colony. Carole looks really pretty in this scene. She says her relationship with Adam is slowing her down. I’m all for her relationship and enjoying her life.
Stuff about Kristen and Josh and how they didn’t so much of that this year. Kristen says that her relationship with Josh is not as contentious as Dorinda and John. There was a ten year wedding anniversary party that we did not see. Carole says her apartment is so much smaller than Kristen’s. For some reason, Carole brings her own wedding album to chat with Kristen. I need to fast through this. I can’t with this today. Wait. Carole says, you are naïve in the fact that you think you are going to win. Kristen tries on the dress and Carole tries to fondle her new boobs. It fits. Carole wants to try it on. That is SO WRONG. Who does this? This is not what girlfriends do. AT ALL.
I can’t help but wonder if this stuff was added last minute. Sonja got a non-surgical nose job. Kristen’s former bridesmaid shows up in red to what appears to be a black and white event. Carole’s gay hairdresser ratted out Sonja for trash talking her at a gay bar. Ramona is pissed there is no food there. Josh says that he “married up” for sure.
We end with a discussion about weeding the lady garden (among other things). Bethenny says that the bush administration is over. Not in the south Bethenny, I’ve been a bush supporter for a year or two now. I may revert back at some point, but I made it though the whole summer this year. #LettingMyselfGo
That was actually one of the better Secrets Revealed shows…
I thought this was more fun than some of the other housewives franchises episodes! Fun, light, a bit rude. Fluffy TV. Not bad.
However: Do we read into something about the anniversary not being aired? I mean, that looked like a pretty fancy and produced party to end up ENTIRELY on the cutting room floor. And probably more interesting than her following Bethenny around trying to pick a fight with sour face. Any thoughts?
Probably has to do with Kristen’s hubby being difficult with production after he got a shitty edit last season. Now that the Ashley Madison thing happened, Bravo realise that the scenes they scrapped are now gold.
Maybe they will air those scenes as flashbacks next season.
Being environmentally conscious, I fully support and back reforestation. Baren lands are drab and unexciting.
Holy Moly TT you sound drunker then Dorinda! ?
I’m down with the reforestation effort. But I’m also fine with a clearing for a landing strip from time to time.
Random thought…. can you IMAGINE Ramona on Below Deck! OMG.
I would love to pit Ramona against Kate.
I fell asleep while watching, I woke up during “Come for the tea….” I thought I was dreaming about TT.
I would love to have a glass/bottles of wine with most of these ladies.
Once while visiting southern Oregon, I was informed by a psychic, that my dream about a crumbling tooth meant a death is immenent. I mean, she was adamant about it….but it’s always randomly true…
Most of my forest disappeared after I turned 45….at least from what I can tell when I look over my belly.
#SmokeytheBearisawol
Hey, something to look forward to!
I bet Bravo showed the anniversary because their angle next season (if Kristen is back) is going to be the cheating scandal. Kristen should leave that scrunch-faced chalupa.
Ashley Madison saved Kristen from the editing floor.
100% this. Also, now Kristen can tell her husband to film whatever scenes she wants (marriage counseling, grovelling etc) if he wants their marriage to last.
I can not believe Josh showed up at his 10 yr Anniversary party with that ridiculous HAT!
That hat is awful. He looks like a tiny Frank Sinatra.
Don’t you dare insult Frank Sinatra like that!
Angela beat me to it. That hat is an insult to Frank. Frank was smooooooooth. Frank at 80 could probably steal Kristen away…. not that I think Kristen is a cheater and amoral… but because Frank’s charisma would just make Josh slither away in shame.
He is definitely more Freddie Krueger than Frank Sinatra.
Hahaha. Sorry guys, apparently I touched a nerve. My point was that Frank Sinatra wore hats like that in the 50’s (60’s?).
This douchebag is trying to channel that or something, but he isn’t pulling it off. It comes off impish and lame on Josh.
Impish… Wrong word and not what I mean.
Lame and STUPID. That’s what I mean.
He’s certainly developed that taste for hatwear for every occasion, even when it looks bad. What he needs is a better hairstylist, one that will confirm for him that a decent hair cut will make his remaining hair look better. But instead, he opts for hats to hide it and hopes it’s fashionable. Two thumbs down.
He has to be bald, right?
Weirdly enough, my best friend had reoccuringly dreams for YEARS about losing her teeth – she eventually talked to someone, I don’t know if they really called themselves a dream analyst – and relayed to me that it apparently means you don’t feel like you’re in control of your life. Seems fitting.
I guess Luann, being the perfect example of lacking self awareness, dreaming she’s just a big damn tooth seems fitting as well.
For years I had dreams that my teeth were falling out 1 or 2 at a time & not surprising during that time, I didn’t feel in control of my life.
In mine they don’t fall out but they’re loose because I’m pulling stuff off of them (like gum that is stuck on them) and another where there’s a string like dental floss that I try to pull out but it just keeps coming out like the clown and the scarf trick. I’m then afraid they will fall out as well as generally freaking out about the whole situation. Therapist says it’s a frustration dream. Yeah…could be frustration with not feeling control of my life. Lol It’s not easy being mental. ?
I have had this dream all of my life. I think it means that I am grinding my teeth when I sleep. Makes sense to me, lol.
I used to work at a bar in Savannah, and they had skinny girl. Its bad liquor, and its Savannah so no one ordered it. We tossed it. No reputable cocktail joint would carry it, its poor quality stuff, but a bar bar might.
I thought the women looked like they were having a lot of fun and actually like each other in this episode. A perfect ending to the best season RHWives has had in years.
Really enjoyed this episode better than the regular season! Too bad Bethenny didn’t consider that she may want that forest back one day. Have a feeling she may need the extra insulation this winter.
Bethenny has been like a vitamin shot to the entire show, to me. If only she would invest in a voice coach and modulate her nasal , sharp sound and slow it down a touch. This would help her to reach more people and be more magnetically attractive. This is small potatoes, though. I kinda love her.
I just saw RHONY Secrets Revealed on Demand. Carole’s meeting with her editor at City Bakery cafe. Not for nothing but CB has the most delish creme brulee in the world. Imagine a creme brulee with a crust that melts in your mouth.
It says something when a RHONY Secrets Revealed episode is better than a regular episode of other HW franchises.
I’m working on an end of season collection of my thoughts but I will say that this season of RHONY is pretty close to perfect and by far my favorite HW season in years.
Me too! I’m actually concerned that if Heather does leave the show, the dynamic will shift negatively. I’m not even a big fan of Heather.
All the ladies (except Kirsten), bring something to the show. Next season even Kirsten will have a good storyline…*cough* Ashley Madison *cough*.
I believe she officially announced it recently. I didn’t report it because I expect you to believe me the first time I tell you and not to have to report it again when other sites catch up. #HairyEyeball
I always believe you TT. The only time we disagreed was on that Kenya issue. Even I know you have amazing sources and put the hard yards into fact checking stories. I’m no fool and you certainly are not an idiot. You HAVE to report it. I’m scared they will try to cast a Meghan HW. ?
Tamara, if you need help with the back end of the site, I’m more than happy to help!
With Heather quitting I am a bit nervous for the next season. Hopefully they don’t add a new HW. I enjoy the dynamic as it is. I don’t want a NY version of Meghan showing up. Fuck that.