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You are here: Home / RHOOC / Brooks Ayers / Real Housewives of Orange County Recap: Sex, Lies and Leeches

Real Housewives of Orange County Recap: Sex, Lies and Leeches

August 31, 2015 by tamaratattles 112 Comments

Why doesn't anyone like me? Do I look evil?
Why doesn’t anyone like me? Do I look evil?

 

It’s time to head back to Orange County and  pick up where we left off with Vicki and Meghan having it out over Meghan’s insistence in participating in Brooks treatment plan while all the while insinuating he doesn’t really have cancer because of some fakeass psychic scene on a TV show.  I already have a headache. I am not sure how much screeching I can take tonight.

Lizzie and Shannon both step in to try to explain to Meghan that Vicki has asked her repeated to stop talking about Brooks because it is none of her business. She needs to stop talking. Heather half heartedly tries to stick up for the little cunt satchel by saying she just cares about Brooks. Vicki points out quickly that Meghan doesn’t know Brooks she met him twice. Meghan starts talking like a four year old and says she cares about everyone with cancer. You know, when she isn’t spreading gossip saying they don’t have cancer at all, or when she is screaming at the cancer patients caregiver saying she knows more about how to treat her man who his own doctors. Outside of off those sorts of things she just loves cancer patients.

I want to poke Meghan’s  eyes out with rusty little knives while she tries to defend herself in her talking head saying that Vicki is deflecting and trying to make her look like the bad person. You are the bad person, Meghan. You are a vile little twat that won’t but out of grown folks business because you want camera time no matter how much of a shit person you look like doing it.

Heather goes on saying that people concerned because they wanted to do chemo on Brooks every day (OMG!!! that sounds like that alone would kill him) and he is not doing it.  Tamra keeps whining over and over “that’s scary to meeeeee!” Because Brooks’ cancer treatment should be all about Tamra. RHOOC Lizzie

Vicki says that she is not going to discuss Brooks health with Meghan or some of the others anymore. End of discussion. But no, Meghan says, “Buuuuut whhhhhhhy???”  Vicki says because she doesn’t think Meghan has good intentions and that she feels she is just being nosy.   Meghan cries like  a four year old.  Heather and Heather’s friend rally around Meghan. Vicki excuses herself to go to the restroom, Shannon and Tamra follow her. Vicki says she is leaving and she never wants to see that girl again.

Vicki has a breakdown with Shannon and Tamra and Heather goes to see her.  For the love of God, Vicki’s mother just died, her man is fighting for his life and people keep coming after her. I really think that Vicki and Brooks broke up because she can’t handle him dying.

After Vicki leaves, Tamra says that she is launching some Cut Fitness youtube thing with a sex tape and she is having a sex party to launch it.  I think Tamra and Nicki Minaj must go to the same church. In case you missed the VMAs last night, Nicki Minaj sang a song about her lady garden while strumming her click like a banjo for a full five minutes on international TV.  Then, oh ten minutes later when she won an award, she sweetly thanked her pastor, and then threatened to kick Miley Cyrus’ flat ass. I’m not sure what demonization the two are, but I think it could be the church that the Kardashians bought for themselves. Because that would make sense.

Shannnon goes to her crazy Dr. Moon, her energy specialist. She is down to only two visits a month. She gets some acupressure to help with anger and resentment. She also needs to do the angry eye exercise.  Admit it. You did it at home when you watched.

Vicki goes to dinner with her son Michael. They briefly discuss Brooks and Michael says he really likes Brooks and Brianna is weird about him.  Funny how it took Brooks getting very ill before production stopped ripping him to shreds with editing every season.

Tamra’s party looks like the public BDSM dungeons you see in pornos, not the kind you see in real life. Um, so I hear.

I’m not going to rehash the Shannon and David drama over and over.  I wish Shannon would follow my lead. This is not healthy for anyone, even the people watching.

I find it hard to identify people in wigs sometimes. I’m serious. I need the whole look and preferable the actual setting in which I know someone to recognize them. It’s going to take me a minute to figure out who everyone is at this party.

RHOOCvickinoideawhatitslike

I do know that Meghan and Jim are fighting in the car ride over. It gives me pleasure to see her treated like shit. She’s just awful.

Tamra tries to tell Meghan not to start with Vicki. We will see how long that lasts. Shannon looks amazing. Vicki arrives in a virginal white lace dress. Meghan is pissed that Vicki is going to get all the attention. I hate fake BDSM crap. Why are Tamra and Eddie both wearing collars? Oh wait. I guess Eddie is the sub/bottom in an err…. alternative universe. It could be amusing for us and frustrating for them to see them fight for the bottom role.  Somehow Eddie is unattractive in the porno. The sex tape was ridiculous.

They have one of those sushi served on a naked girl buffets. The obvious grossness involved (I totally agree with Heather) aside, have we entered a time machine and returned to 1994?  Jim is back in his heyday and wants to eat the flowers off the girl with his mouth.  Side note, the flowers cover the tits and lady garden, the sushi itself in on banana leaves covering parts of the body that are easier to keep clean.

Tamra’s conversation is about her appointment to go see a “pasture” about getting baptized.  Do they not ever  use the word ‘pastor’ in Idiots Guide to the Bible?  This is news to Eddie. The first time they have a conversation about Tamra new found religion is when she is half nekkid in a lace catsuit wearing a collar and leash and he is in a collar with the word ‘slave’ embossed in silver colored studs. I imagine this happens a lot, but this is my first time witnessing it on television. Tamra asks Eddie if he thinks she is some kind of weirdo. Eddie says he has never thought that. She does some fucked up shit but he doesn’t think she is weird.  Probably because I don’t really think Eddie thinks about her much at all.  I am wondering who put that collar on him and what he looks like…but I think about weird stuff.  Vicki calls Tamra out on calling Alexis “Jesus Jugs.”

Just when things were getting interesting, things start to get weird. Heather’s stomach is bleeding onto her skirt. A lot. Um apparently Heather and Terry both have leeches duct taped to their abdomens to suck out blood. They later plan to squeeze the blood out of the leeches and give themselves vampire facials. Who knew Heather and Terry are the kinkiest people at the sex party?  I’m not particularly surprised.  Terry shows  Vicki photos of the leeches that are apparently off of them now but left bloody holes in their place. Heather says that Tamara has a second outfit and she is of to borrow it.  I am certain Tamra will never want it back.

cookerhooker

 

For some reason, Meghan needs another top herself because of some sort of nip slip type wardrobe malfunction. So all the ladies go into the bathroom to get Heather into another dress and Meghan into another top.  Oh and Terry walks in. But he’s a doctor. He sees naked women all day. So that’s fine, right? Terry is in there to tape his wife back up and fix his own leakage.

At the :40 mark, drunk Vicki counsels the sushi girl and tells her she deserves a better job as Tamra grabs sushi off of her and shoves it in her mouth.

Tamra and Vicki are doing their drunken hug thing after watching the very hot David dangle from a hoop. Meghan tries to butt in and Tamra tries to facilitate a group hug. Vicki says to Meghan that she is not very nice but she will hug her anyway and accept her apology. Meghan, being the dumb cunt that she is says she as nothing to apologize for and tries to start shit with Vicki.  Jim is probably writing his phone number in the inner thigh of the sushi girl while all this is going on. Or perhaps he is in a room somewhere flogging Eddie.

I have to respect Vicki for not physically attacking Meghan. I would have gotten physical at this point. Especially with a few drinks in me. I’d have to go to jail over this bitch. She calls “Jimmy” over into women’s business. Straight up little girl move. He arrives and she says, “She just called me evil!”  Seriously? Is this really happening?  Jim tries to stick up for her.  Jim keeps saying that this is none of his business. Why can’t he convey this to his twatwaffle of a wife. Jim tries to drag the bitch off.  Jim says to Vicki that he thinks Meghan overstepped her boundaries but she was trying to help. That is the route for him to take. Now he just needs to walk away as the fucktardess has left the area.  But no, when Shannon asks what he would do if someone said his ex doesn’t have cancer he said he would go get her files from the doctor and show them to the person. My God he is dumber than dirt. Meghan finally comes to drag her man away. Vicki says, “Jim talk to me in five years when you are divorced!” At that point Vicki loses me. Jim was doing the best he could after his horrid beard played the whole “defend your wife from this bitch” card. That is never acceptable. Your man cannot fight your battles with another female. The only option he has is to remove his wife to safety.  It actually looks like she said that to Shannon after Jim was back at the other bar with his succubus.

Once Jim and the meddling gold digger are alone he tells her to never put him in that situation again. She tries to sidle up to him but it is not working. He shuts her down and says he doesn’t really give a fuck what they are talking about. She storms off. Perfect. She goes to whine to other women telling them she wants to leave.

Vicki approaches Jim and APOLOGIZES!  Yay Vicki!  She recognizes he was in a bad situation. He’s fine with Vicki. Meghan storms over and tells Jim they are leaving. He could not be happier to get out of there. He is on his photo texting someone as they speak. Meghan will be home alone.

Vicki tells Shannon that Jim told Brooks they had been married for four months and two of them were very challenging. In the car ride home Meghan is going in on her poor husband saying she said she feels sorry for you for having to deal with me for the rest of your life! He says, “hopefully.” BWAHAHAHHAHA  Then Jim says he isn’t mad at her for anything.  Jim says he saw Brooks at a game the other day and he likes him and if he doesn’t want treatment anymore it is none of their business. She still tries to argue that he must do it. He keeps  saying if they don’t want help, so be it! Over and over. And Meghan is thinking… BUT IT’S MY STORYLINE! I KNOW A LOT ABOUT CANCER BECAUSE YOUR EX IS DYING!  I GET TO PICK EVERYONE’S TREATMENT PLANT Jim, “They don’t want help! So be it!”

Vicki is plotting the takedown of the little shithead.

Jim says that Meghan taught him not to care what Twitter trolls say to him. REALLY? Grown men need this taught to them? And she need to take her own advice and let it roll of her back.  Meghan says, ” She’s a con artist!”  Jim is all like who cares and Meghan says it’s about justice. She is very down for some justice. Oh little mentally challenged girl, justice will be swift.  Meanwhile,  Jim is giving the Uber guy  verbal directions to the OC version of Weho. There has to be one, right?

Next week: VIcki goes to Oklahoma,  Shannon’s kids have an inappropriate dinner for their parents and Tamra let’s Eddie know he is supporting  her son and his family.

P.S. I am not sure if all of my media is fully ready to go yet. So forgive the random gifs. I have to use what fits until this is all sorted out.

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Filed Under: Brooks Ayers, Entertainment News, Heather Dubrow, Meghan King Edmonds, Real Housewives of Orange County, RHOOC, Shannon Beador, Tamra Judge, Terry Dubrow, Vicki Gunvalson Tagged With: Bravo, Charity Event, Elizabeth "Lizzie" Rovsek, Entertainment, Entertainment News, Heather Dubrow, Jeana Keough, Meghan Edmonds, Moorea, Real Housewives of Orange County, Recap, RHOOC, Season 10 Premiere, Shannon Beador, Sharks, Tahiti, Tamra Judge, Twatwaffles, Under Construction, Vicki Gunvalson

About tamaratattles

Come for the tea. Stay for the shade. Not for the easily offended. You're a special snowflake just like everyone else.

Comments

  1. TAT says

    August 31, 2015 at 11:17 pm

    Oh FFS, I would have happily gone to jail just for the pleasure of bitch slapping that dumb ass Meghan. Seriously. How can anyone be that clueless and self-absorbed? And frankly I hope Heather gets a major splinter in her ass for riding the fence so hard. Her statement that Meghan cares shows what a complete idiot she is too. Tamra? JHC. She is saved and this is the first time Eddie is hearing about this religious conversion? Somebody isn’t doing it right. Just sayin’… The only redeeming feature of this episode was Vicki apologizing. She was way out of bounds but I cut her some major slack for that. She’s right by the way but still – it’s like actually telling someone those jeans make their ass look fat…you can think it but you really shouldn’t say it….we should start a divorce pool….

    Reply
    • Erica says

      September 1, 2015 at 2:27 am

      Heather has never liked completely cutting someone off… remember that for a time, she was Tamra’s ONLY friend.

      She kind of has to ride the fence. I think Terry and Jim are genuine friends – as in not just for the show – and she’s probably the reason why Megan even came to the attention of the producers as they delved into the HW friend list for possible new housewives. Until Jim dumps Megan for #5 AND the DuBrows want to keep the friendship with Jim – Heather is stuck on that fence.

      I have watched my mom have to ride that fence more than once with both a family friend and my uncle. Both married more times than Jim!!! Basically while friend or uncle was either married or sleeping with the wife/girlfriend – she had to play nice no matter what to keep the peace / maintain relationships.

      Reply
  2. KaraW says

    August 31, 2015 at 11:22 pm

    Ha ha – I know what you mean about the wigs, but I loved everyone’s new look. They all should keep these styles for a while.

    Lizzie tried so hard to keep Meghan in line and explain how normal people behave, but it’s hopeless.

    Reply
  3. ericzku says

    August 31, 2015 at 11:22 pm

    Why oh why couldn’t Christian have taken his shirt off at the “sex” party? My night would have been made so much better.

    I found Jim’s discussion with Meghan satisfying. No question that he thinks she’s an idiot…or worse.

    Reply
    • tamaratattles says

      September 1, 2015 at 1:30 am

      I thought David looked hot at the party.

      Reply
      • dahlsma says

        September 1, 2015 at 2:06 pm

        yes, David is dishy. Those blue eyes of his kill me. Dayum…

        Reply
      • JoJoFLL says

        September 4, 2015 at 4:08 pm

        I have always thought he was gorgeous!! OMG those eyes!

        Reply
  4. tamaratattles says

    August 31, 2015 at 11:54 pm

    So hey guys, not everyone can get into the new site yet. If you are here, if you have some time, head back into the deep archives and look around a bit and make sure everything is working. Just doing some deep exploring would help a lot to active all the tags, archives, links, etc.

    I have a feeling things are still loading, so just snooping around would help. Put your favorite topic in the search box and read old threads… etc.

    Reply
    • Gabriella says

      September 3, 2015 at 10:17 pm

      Aw shucks TT, my comment’s not there! Must be one of the ones that got propelled into the stratosphere!

      Reply
  5. JoJoFLL says

    September 1, 2015 at 12:04 am

    Seeing Meghan talk in the limo ride home reminds me of that skit Cecily Strong does on SNL Weekend Update when she does the Drunk Girl You Wish You Hadn’t Started A Conversation With At A Party. ‘Cause Justice Seth!

    Reply
  6. captivagrl says

    September 1, 2015 at 12:32 am

    What the hell am I watching? The shark jumped the shark that the other shark jumped. Leeches on both Dubrows at a random sex party? This shit is stupid.

    Reply
  7. Dish Roy says

    September 1, 2015 at 12:40 am

    It never ceases to amaze me that stupid/ignorant people get rich in this country. I must discuss this with my Pasture.

    Reply
    • tamaratattles says

      September 1, 2015 at 1:29 am

      OMG. I totally get this comment. It never really bothered me until recently.

      Reply
    • loriflack says

      September 1, 2015 at 9:42 am

      ? ?

      Reply
    • Riley says

      September 1, 2015 at 1:06 pm

      WOW ! I say it all the time. If you are a felon or trashy or just plain stupid, you can make a boatload of money.

      Reply
    • Riley says

      September 1, 2015 at 1:11 pm

      I posted a comment here but it didn’t take. I was agreeing with Dish Roy. I complain about it a lot. If you are a felon, trashy or stupid you can get paid lots of money, especially by Bravo. If this comment doesn’t post I guess maybe I should email you Tamara.

      Reply
  8. @immelza says

    September 1, 2015 at 12:41 am

    I too would have throttled that stupid ass Meghan! Someone needs to tell her acting like Jim is your Daddy is not going to help her marriage (I’m pretty sure he has someone else who calls him Daddy – nttawwt!) Shannon just gives me the major sads this year & the stuff with her kids she will regret someday. Sex dungeon party was just bizzare and it didn’t look like too many people showed up and the whole leech thing was gross (honey let’s go home…express these leeches and give each other facials….only in the OC!

    Reply
  9. French says

    September 1, 2015 at 12:47 am

    Oh loved the recap, was dying laughing at Meghan calling her husband in to save her, I can’t wait to watch in the morning! Thanksfre

    Reply
  10. microop says

    September 1, 2015 at 12:48 am

    I like everyone except Meghan. I thought Heather and Terry were funny at the party. As terrible as Meghan is, its very difficult to watch scenes with her and Jim.

    Reply
    • Erica says

      September 1, 2015 at 2:06 am

      I know why they have a good marriage – they crack each other up. I also like how they are quietly supportive of Vicki – yes, they are in an awkward position with Jimmy being their friend and I could tell she really wanted to tell Megan that pushing Vicki about Brooks treatment was totally inappropriate – in her fancy way she was telling her to stuff it at the lunch. BUT – when she went down the hall to check on Vicki, who put her arm around Vicki and who did Vicki lean into when she was talking about how sad she was, etc. Heather. I suspect strongly that the Tamra getting baptized by her “pasture” happened after the Vicki/Meghan confrontation – did you notice that Terry had his arm around Vicki’s shoulders and she had her arm around him (and not in a tacky way) Two faced Tamra told Megan she agreed with her!!! (and Shannon saying to Jim that Megan shouldn’t repeat that stuff – was a bit hypocritical since if Vicki hadn’t shut her up, she would have totally repeated it.)

      Oh… and while I hate the skreetchy judgmental Vicki (who usually has blinders on – but not in this case Megan), the Vicki that I love is the one who was bent over sushi girl telling her to go to college. That had me laughing (which set off a bad coughing fit)

      Reply
      • Gabriella says

        September 3, 2015 at 10:04 pm

        @Erica: Totally agree with your comment about Shannon being a hypocrite! In the last episode when they were at dinner with Vicki and Brooks and Shannon’s fake tears in the bathroom, she couldn’t wait to stir the pot and yet that’s what she accused Meghan of in her talking head. And then in this episode she kept saying Meghan shouldn’t have brought it up and yet that’s exactly what she tried to do. She’s trying to get back in Vicki’s good books.

        Reply
  11. BeetsWhy says

    September 1, 2015 at 12:56 am

    I can’t believe I feel bad for Meghan but her husband should have her back in public, he can tell her the truth later. I see a divorce there. But I also can’t believe she had the quote of the night to me about Vicki overreacting and comparing Vickis reaction to Brooks being a maybe liar to someone telling her she is short! Think about it and love it. My ex husband told me I wasn’t aggressive enough the night he met me and I laughed because I knew that wasn’t an issue for me. He didn’t laugh in divorce court.

    Reply
    • tamaratattles says

      September 1, 2015 at 1:21 am

      You are an idiot. Her husband DID stick up for her cunt ass. And the analogy of tall and short is the same to you as SOMEONE HAVING CANCER AND SOMEONE WHO DOESN’T EVEN KNOW THEM BARGING IN TO SAY THEY ARE DOING IT WRONG?

      Vicki’s mother just died. Brooks has had cancer for quite some time BEFORE this season. Chemo isn’t working. They are exploring other treatments and you think that is the same thing as some little cuntsicle who knows NOTHING about what is going on barging in and demanding to she his medical charts to prove he is not lying about his treatment while he is fighting for his fucking life?

      SHUT THE MOTHER FUCK UP.

      Reply
      • Erica says

        September 1, 2015 at 2:18 am

        If someone had insinuated that any of my loved ones weren’t sick when they actually were – I’d have to be physically restrained, and I’m generally an easy going person. To also question his treatment plan when she really doesn’t know all the details is disgusting – I can get, as Heather said, to be INTERNALLY frustrated that he APPEARS to not be availing himself of an option you wish your loved one had is understandable – but to take it out on Vicki?? Evil. Oh.. and even if Vicki was married to Brooks AND she turned around and said “Megan YOU ARE SO SMART AND SO RIGHT ABOUT WHAT BROOKS SHOULD BE DOING TO SURVIVE CANCER… there is NOTHING Vicki could do about it. It is BROOKS decision – so why torture Vicki with the possibilities?

        I am sure that Vicki’s mom has been her go to place to vent about Brooks’ cancer and her daughter’s reactions to him, etc. I’m sure that has a lot to do with Vicki’s obvious vulnerability.

        Oh… and her analogy about being told she’s “short” is one of the WORST I’ve ever read. It sucks donkey balls. How you can think that is valid makes me wonder if you are Meghan, at home alone, while Jim is out finding #5. I’m short – and if someone kept screeching at me ‘YOU ARE TALL’ YOU ARE TALL’ WHY AREN’T YOU LISTENING TO ME! I’M FOR JUSTICE! YOU ARE TALL!’ that someone would eventually get throat punched, even if I had to climb up on a stool to do it.

        Reply
        • tamaratattles says

          September 1, 2015 at 4:32 am

          exactly. my really tall ass would have killed her.

          Reply
      • Erica says

        September 1, 2015 at 5:23 am

        TT.. your tall ass takes the throat and a punch to the heart… my short ass will do a punch to the twat waffle and take out the knee caps…. together we can really take out a bitch.

        Jesus she makes this usually peaceful person pretty bloodthirsty. Props to the OG of the OC.

        Reply
        • tamaratattles says

          September 1, 2015 at 3:58 pm

          I really, really get violent tendencies when I see her stupid face.

          Reply
      • Shae says

        September 1, 2015 at 9:42 am

        and what’s worse is, she isn’t even owning the fact she was definitely not expressing concern over his treatment choices, she was promoting and giving air to the gossip from the psychic that he wasn’t sick. Citing examples of how in his choice of words it seemed like he “had” it as in past tense, and getting all excited like she discovered some conspiracy. Her entire tone was not one of “omg, why is he stopping chemo, I’m so worried” it was gossipy, like she had some major scoop and caught him in a giant lie- glee, even. She’s so screwed when they play back the footage of that convo on the reunion.

        If you’re going to be a trifling bitch, at least own it, don’t fake cry about how worried you are about the guy you totally threw under the bus.

        Reply
      • Siohban says

        September 1, 2015 at 11:44 am

        Oh how I love you Tamara!

        Reply
      • Redhibiscus says

        September 10, 2015 at 1:59 am

        Why are you so incredibly nasty? I read on another blog that you are totally a Vicki supporter and would lop off the head of anyone who disagrees with you. Are you a woman? Most women don’t call other women the c word but I’m sure you’ll call me one now too. You were completely off base about basements in OK but I image you’ve deleted that post. Don’t waste your breath, I don’t want to read your page any more than you welcome my elderly ass.

        Reply
    • janet says

      September 1, 2015 at 10:39 pm

      I think Jim did stick up for his wife in a dignified way. He said she meant well wasnt being evil blah blah. My husband would have been mortified if I had pulled him into a dumb argument like that, and I try to handle my own battles myself. Any decent normal husband I think would have wondered why their wife would be discussing someone’s private health issues and gossiping about it. I get the creeps wirh people using their spouse as an attack dog.

      Reply
      • librarygirl says

        September 2, 2015 at 1:16 pm

        Her ugly fake cry face looks like she is trying to control a fart.

        Reply
  12. Margarett says

    September 1, 2015 at 12:56 am

    This is the best recap ever. I’ll bring the “little rusty knives”. I’m off to do some deep archive exploring. That almost sounds a bit nasty. 😉

    Reply
    • Avery says

      September 2, 2015 at 9:39 pm

      It really is!! Tamara can i stand on your shoulders and smack that twit?

      Reply
  13. beth says

    September 1, 2015 at 1:02 am

    What is wrong with Shannon’s husband? He looks like death warmed over – his face is gray.

    Reply
    • spk says

      September 1, 2015 at 3:12 am

      I’ve noticed that too–doesn’t look right, does it? Not a good sign OR someone has a bad eye for matching foundation makeup on the men.

      Reply
    • Erica says

      September 1, 2015 at 3:37 am

      I don’t find him attractive at all, so try not to look too much. Speaking of gray face… did anyone notice how pale Megan got in the limo ride home when she KNEW Jim was pissed even though he said he wasn’t.

      Reply
    • cawoman23 says

      September 2, 2015 at 12:20 am

      He looks oddly subdued and you’re right – a bit gray.

      Reply
    • Gabriella says

      September 7, 2015 at 6:44 pm

      David just looks so unhappy. Did anyone else see his face when he walked in the door for some get together behind Shannon? He just didn’t want to be there. I hope they really did enjoy each other’s company in Hawaii.

      Reply
  14. sequoia says

    September 1, 2015 at 1:41 am

    Honey, you’re in good form tonight. The recap was hilarious!

    Reply
  15. mef7788 says

    September 1, 2015 at 3:27 am

    I have to admit that at first I thought Meghan looked pretty good at the party.

    But then I took a second look.

    She looked like a weird cross between Catherine Zeta Jones in Chicago and Jimminy Cricket in a cheap brunette wig.

    Reply
    • MM in OC says

      September 1, 2015 at 9:39 pm

      Meghan reminded me of Brandi when she wore that taupe dress to the Oscar party. Way too short and small for her.

      Reply
  16. The Lady Cocotte says

    September 1, 2015 at 3:37 am

    Heather & Terry did the vampire facial for his other other show (i.e.: not Botched). It’s maybe called Good Work… RuPaul & Sofia Vergara’s sister co-host. I only watched it because I’m contractually obligated to watch anything RuPaul touches.

    Reply
    • janet says

      September 3, 2015 at 1:57 am

      I thought it was neat that Terry and Heather seemed to be having so much fun with the leeches. I have to admit im kinda game for any beauty treatment myself. They looked cute as the sado masochistic couple. I thought it was interesting that Brooks didnt want to come to the sex party and Vickie had to go alone. Of course the ladies would have been watching everything he drank and bugging him. I can totally see why some people dont tell anyone when they have a major illness.

      Reply
      • msdc says

        September 6, 2015 at 10:03 pm

        I thought Vicki said Brooks didn’t feel well. You’re right though, they would have been watching him like a hawk. Although Shannon made a comment about Brooks having two drinks at dinner, it’s because she truly is concerned not because of irrational suspicions.

        I can’t say I blame him for not wanting to be around people who think he’s faking his illness, not many would. It’s bad enough fighting an illness, but the thought of having to defend himself from ridiculous accusations must be overwhelming.

        Reply
  17. lisamia says

    September 1, 2015 at 4:54 am

    Best recap ever!!! Terry used the leeches on a patient on Botched. OMG he uses them on Heather and himself!! I only watched half the show, but weakened and read your recap anyway. I want to see the post telling Eddie about supporting Tamra’s loser son sex tape.
    I’d happily go to jail if I had to deal with someone like Meghan. I don’t think Vicky is going to have to wait 5 years for that divorce.
    Thanks, TT! <3

    Reply
  18. lisamia says

    September 1, 2015 at 5:02 am

    Not sure why, but my first message is awaiting moderation. So, will just say thanks for the great recap, TT!

    Reply
  19. Sali says

    September 1, 2015 at 5:40 am

    Bam! Tamara, you hit it out of the park with this post for the all new TT.com. Excellent christening! Hilarious post! Bravo & congratulations!

    Reply
  20. Angel(?) says

    September 1, 2015 at 6:59 am

    This show has really gone to the dark side. There is not enough fun in it. How long is this season going to drag on?

    Reply
  21. DJ says

    September 1, 2015 at 7:08 am

    OMG! The genius that is TT! TWATWAFFLE???! LOVE IT!! Tamara, you need to write a book with “Tamarisms” and their definitions! LOL! I needed a laugh this morning! THANKS!!!!

    Reply
  22. Just Saying says

    September 1, 2015 at 7:14 am

    Omg thank you for the recap! I think I just watched this show with my mouth hanging open going huh? This has to be one of the oddest he episodes ever. There is so much to comment on that I’m just going to say go Vicki! Loved her telling the naked table buffet to get an education thank you Vicki

    Reply
    • cookies75 says

      September 1, 2015 at 8:03 pm

      Vicki’s concern for that girl is as sincere as Meghan’s concern for Brooks.

      Reply
  23. fivecatsownme says

    September 1, 2015 at 8:29 am

    I have noticed that Tamra frequently likes to use dildos as decorative elements.
    She is the real trouble maker in the group. She’s the one who asked the psychic about Brooks’ cancer in the first place. She certainly likes to pour poison in peoples’ ears.
    Poor Vicki, she is scared to death about losing Brooks. Worried that the treatment might not work. Meghan, the FNG, is the most obtuse creature on thr planet. Can’t she see that Vicki is barely hanging on? I should think by age 30 somthing one would lose the self centeredness of the teens and twenties.
    Heather told Meghan at NASCAR she was spreading rumors about Brooks not having cancer by repeating what the psychic said.
    She and Lizzie nicely told Meghan to leaving Vicki alone. Meghan is going to find a horse’s head in her bed if she doesn’t watch out.
    I think Vicki is worried that this treatment won’t work and wants Brooks to go for more chemo, but loves him enough to say her wants don’t matter.
    I think Jimmy must have had a vasectomy and that is why Meghan wants to be mommy to the step children.
    Go back to work Meghan. Carve out a life for yourself. Don’t be dependent on Kimmy and his kids for your happiness.

    Reply
    • tamaratattles says

      September 1, 2015 at 3:57 pm

      “I have noticed that Tamra frequently likes to use dildos as decorative elements.”

      OMG I so needed that today. Bear with me guys. I am working just on technical crap and trying to get everyone in. Random people are being moderated. Don’t freak out, I’m on it. And RHOA is coming. Still waiting on info.

      Reply
      • Sweeeet says

        September 1, 2015 at 9:43 pm

        My first time reading tamaratattles and I cannot stop you are the absolute best ever!! you have made my whole week made me laugh soo hard I really can’t believe I’ve missed out il look up archives for sure, and these comments are so damn hilarious I really can’t believe I was never here before!!
        Ur best! My search terms for finding this site was…I hate Meghan Edmonds…and look I found u!;)

        Reply
        • tamaratattles says

          September 1, 2015 at 10:14 pm

          YAY! Welcome!

          Reply
  24. Forbes List says

    September 1, 2015 at 8:55 am

    Vicky should pay this little girl no mind. Just freeze her out, plain ignore her. when she starts talking just talking just be like “oh look! IT thinks its people” and continue with your life uninterrupted. or better yet let her say her spiel then calmly say to her afterwards “duly noted” and turn away to continue having adult conversations with the others. The lady of the house never gets into a fight with the help… or in this case the nanny.

    Reply
    • cookies75 says

      September 1, 2015 at 8:15 pm

      But Vicki is no lady…therefore she screeches and insults and bullies (don’t care about Meghan, just speaking to her overall attitude as seen for 10 years on RHOC).

      Reply
      • Pip says

        September 1, 2015 at 11:49 pm

        Cookies-
        I agree with you. Vicki is awful. I get it… She had a rough year, so people are giving her a pass. But Vicki has always been awful. And Tamra is as two-faced as they come. I really can’t stand either of them. I don’t think you should question an acquaintances medical diagnosis. Ever. But Tamra started that shit with the psychic. I am sure the “psychic” has seen the show. Are we suppose to believe he wasn’t already acquainted with the storyline? Meghan was a dumbass for repeating it.
        Vicki went off on Meghan and Jim’s parenting skills. Not cool. I don’t know many parents who wouldn’t come over the table at someone for that.

        Reply
  25. Shae says

    September 1, 2015 at 9:36 am

    This recap was everything lol

    Meghan was absolutely out of fking control, how does she not realize how pathetic it looks calling your husband over to handle an argument you’re having with other ladies? You can’t handle yourself amongst your peers? Sad. Jim was just brutal to her, telling her to “zip it”, 100% dismissive- this marriage is not the “partnership” she seems to think it is. It seems Jim “parents” his wife more than he does his kids, he has a rather laissez-faire style with them but Meghan needs constant reprimanding lol

    They make me extremely uncomfortable, but I think Jim handled himself the best he could in that situation. I would’ve been losing my mind, he kept his cool so kudos to him. His wife is a goddamn disaster.

    Reply
    • JoJoFL says

      September 1, 2015 at 11:05 am

      Their marriage is hard to watch. I agree from what I’ve seen he parents her. I’m scratching my head trying to figure out how they ended up married. I understand the whole editing argument but don’t you think there’d be at least ONE good moment between the two of them? I’m surprised it was the other couple that split and not Jim and Meghan however I did see a better side of Jim last night.

      Reply
      • Shae says

        September 1, 2015 at 12:06 pm

        Exactly. Editing can definitely affect things but you can usually see at least some warmth/affection/chemistry between couples who are actually good together. You can’t disguise that with editing. They don’t seem to have any.

        Reply
  26. loriflack says

    September 1, 2015 at 9:49 am

    Yes, that would probably work really well, freeze Meghan out, like a wart.

    Reply
  27. Sherry says

    September 1, 2015 at 11:50 am

    I am officially hooked on TT. I mean I have been for about a year or so now, but last night all I could think about when watching this show is….OHHHH I wonder what TT is gonna say about that? LOL! Great recap! Thanks so much I agreed with you 100%. Meghan is terrible! I actually think it is so rude for production to let this happen to Vicki. She has been through so much and then with Brooks. I can’t with her, she is terrible. Oh and PASTURE…WHAT? How does that happen??
    I do wish Shannon could get over it. I so understand though, sometimes you can’t get yourself out of that thinking. I like her a lot and think she is funny and I would love to see her happy.

    Reply
  28. Tara says

    September 1, 2015 at 12:00 pm

    Part of me fell in love with Jim, watching him disrespect his wife was wonderful. I am a terrible person,I already know I am going to hell.

    Reply
    • Shae says

      September 1, 2015 at 12:09 pm

      I’m right there with you lol

      Reply
    • librarygirl says

      September 2, 2015 at 1:25 pm

      We can meet there. I am so not interested in Meghan that even her husband being rude to her does not disturb me. Same with Vicki, though, I love to see people get the best of her because she dishes it out without thinking. I am evil….

      Reply
    • MissMissy says

      September 2, 2015 at 1:45 pm

      I love how we all feel evil for enjoying when bad things happen to this evil robobitch. I hate feeling like there’s no justice in the world.

      Also why I love reading TT’s recaps because she says everything I’m thinking about these disgusting people (and then some). It’s like the therapy I need after watching these shows.

      Reply
  29. Merilyn Zallan Ulrich says

    September 1, 2015 at 12:00 pm

    This was one of the very best recaps you have ever written. I find myself actually getting really upset over Meghan and her bratty behavior and I want to poke out her beady little eyes. I was also disgusted with fence riding Heather and her desire to be Mrs. Perfect Peace Maker. She is a fake and a snob and I have never liked her or her ridiculous husband. There are more feminine husbands on this show than on any other (Eddie, Jim Edmonds, Etc.) and although I agree that David is kind of cute, he is also totally without a personality so he annoys me too. It’s a sad day when the only one I can tolerate is Brooks. Tamara is just a total pot stirrer and I just can’t anymore with her. The “sex tape” and horrid party was an embarrassment and I don’t know why anyone would go to their gym after seeing this crap. Pervs don’t exactly attract me and encourage me to spend my money patronizing their business. I relived the awful show reading your recap and it sunk in that I was torturing myself for an hour winding up with a headache and lots of self-recriminations for tolerating this B.S. As I said,, brilliant and totally on point recap and I thank you for being brave enough to go back over the evenings mishugas for all of us. My dream is for Terry, Jim and Eddie to walk out on the creeps that they are stuck with so we can all see it. Whatever Brooks decides to do regarding his treatment I hope it works for him but I have a feeling that they actually told him that they couldn’t do anything for him regarding standard treatments and that’s why he is using alternative methods. If that’s the case then this is sad and does explain why Vicki may not be able to handle their relationship watching him die. She is not as strong a person as she’d like people to believe and that could be the reason for the over-reaction to everything. She seems like a sad and lonely person and for that reason I forgive her outbursts.

    Reply
    • sundayhare3 says

      September 1, 2015 at 11:30 pm

      @Merilyn loved your comment. I pretty much agree with everything you said esp. about Brooks. I thought the same thing. They don’t need to tell anyone anything and are cagey about the information. I think he has been told that they can’t do anymore with chemo. I hope it isn’t true. This is very sad.
      Another thing I want to comment on is that little conversation between Tamara and Eddie about her “Christianity” was very telling about their relationship. This is supposedly a “big deal to her” and she hasn’t bothered to fill in her husband on this life change. My husband would certainly ALREADY know about where my faith is and if it changed he would be the first to know.

      Reply
  30. Cat says

    September 1, 2015 at 12:07 pm

    I have to confess.

    I didn’t really read this one….just skimmed it, and comments.

    I’m just here to support TT, and the site.

    There is nothing real about these “real housewives”. And, they aren’t really housewives, are they?

    My mom was a real housewife. And she was never like this.

    Reply
  31. RI Red says

    September 1, 2015 at 12:43 pm

    Best recap ever, Tamara! I wish we could get someone who studies body language to read into Jimmy’s actions while in the car talking with Meghan. He played with his wedding ring the whole time….I think that’s something very telling. I just don’t know what!

    Reply
  32. peachteachr says

    September 1, 2015 at 2:37 pm

    LOVE and your new site is wonderful. Off to reread Arias stuff. We need anot_er evil psyc_o trial. Boy was Arias evil to bone.

    Reply
    • Dracla Dunning says

      September 3, 2015 at 8:16 am

      We haven’t heard about her for a while. Wonder if she is still in solitary confinement?

      Reply
  33. Riley says

    September 1, 2015 at 4:01 pm

    Testing…

    Reply
  34. Valerii says

    September 1, 2015 at 4:19 pm

    TT- Love you r new Site!!!

    Well, my mother had been diagnosed with Lupus. Told she may have 6 years to live (Mind you she was in her late 30s). My (now former) Mother-in-law made a quip as how my mom didn’t look sick and could not understand why I could not leave her on Thanksgiving (ALONE) to spend the holiday with her and her son (my now ex). It took every fiber of my being to remain calm. Oh she died one year later. To feign empathy when you are actually trying to cause more distress is just vile (MKE)!

    Reply
  35. tlcory says

    September 1, 2015 at 4:53 pm

    This site is my entertainment it goes like this…….
    -Send Adult kids and Grandchildren home
    -Clean up mess
    -Get a cup of coffee…….ok ok a margarita
    -Sit down and pull up Tamara Tattles
    -Drink…laugh….contemplate commenting but don’t do it usually because if I say something stupid and someone is mean to me my daily entertainment is ruined and I’ll have to drink a couple more margaritas to calm down. ( yeah I’m going through menopause hot flashes and emotions get the best of me)

    The recap was awesome, can’t stand Megan and love the names Tamara comes up with.

    Have a Great Day!

    Reply
    • Maisey says

      September 2, 2015 at 2:09 am

      Tlcory,

      I like your post and kinda know what you mean.
      Sometimes I will just think about what I want to write and will hesitate because it just sounds stupid. And oh, when someone is mean to me, I just hate it for 2-3 days and stay away.
      Funny, huh? Especially with the safety and anonymity of the Internet you would think it wouldn’t matter.
      But I say quit contemplating, go ahead and post, jump in and have some fun.
      I’ll have your back.

      Unless you like Meghan. ?

      Reply
      • tlcory says

        September 2, 2015 at 10:48 am

        Thank you for understanding and NO I can’t stand Megan I think she is the most immature housewife ever, her talking heads with her snide remarks and facial expressions would make one think she was in high school still. #GoawayMegan

        Reply
      • tamaratattles says

        September 2, 2015 at 12:57 pm

        Maisey’s comment is stupid. She is one of the funniest commenters here. It’s like Angelina Jolie saying she is insecure about her looks!

        Reply
      • tlcory says

        September 3, 2015 at 12:09 am

        This is posting out of order but I’ll comment anyways. obviously the snark went over my head expecially since my comment was in jest since I rarely drink and I definitely don’t loose sleep over any remarks made to me, I over exaggerated and was making fun of myself since my emotions are efffed up right now but not to that extreme, I just thought she was being sweet and didn’t get my exaggeration so I left it at that, I’m not on here enough to catch others personality and who’s making underhanded jabs but hey I’ve got a sense of humor and can see where it was too good to pass up.

        Oh and I still hate Megan. Lol

        Reply
      • tlcory says

        September 3, 2015 at 12:13 am

        Well I guess it did post in the right order.

        Reply
  36. annie moore says

    September 1, 2015 at 6:15 pm

    Bravo (no pun intended) on the recap!!! I wanted to slap Meghan and tell her just to shut up!!! And, when she does that thing with her face, when she purses her lips and gives the “judgy” eyes, she reminds me of Dana Carvey as The Church Lady. I’m honestly not getting why she just doesn’t shut up!!! Move on to a new topic. Oh that’s right, this is her only story line. . .well, aside from her husband never being there or moving. She’s got to go!

    Reply
    • Tara says

      September 1, 2015 at 9:46 pm

      Omgoodness! Thank you! That is it. It has been driving me crazy. Church Lady! I loved that skit.

      Reply
      • librarygirl says

        September 2, 2015 at 5:25 pm

        Kyle also does the church lady thing with her lips. Drives me nuts. Isn’t that special!

        Reply
      • tamaratattles says

        September 2, 2015 at 6:31 pm

        http://41.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ljpr7iHA5T1qaceo9o1_500.jpg

        Reply
      • tamaratattles says

        September 2, 2015 at 6:32 pm

        ha. I was trying to see if I could post the photo. Sadly, not.

        Reply
      • Tara says

        September 3, 2015 at 12:24 am

        TT I can see the pic! It’s perfect

        Reply
    • MissMissy says

      September 2, 2015 at 1:37 pm

      She seems like a caricature and not a real person, so that is spot on. It’s the eyes and the twitchy mouth. God, she is weird. Wouldn’t it be great if the rest of the season, every time she spoke, people just said, “Shut up, Meghan.” Including Jim. I already have been saying it out loud every time she’s on.

      Reply
      • librarygirl says

        September 2, 2015 at 5:29 pm

        LOLOL, what I would love to do to her in real life. I didn’t know that I had such a lack of self control until I kept on wanting to slap her every time she fake cried, grimaced, or sulked. She is a tween, and should find friends her own age to torture.

        Reply
      • janet says

        September 3, 2015 at 2:10 am

        Ha ha that’s a good idea. I think if everyone did that Meaghen would go nuclear and leave the show. I could see Jim participating too. I think its what hes thinking whenever she talks.

        Reply
  37. Pip says

    September 1, 2015 at 9:22 pm

    Hmmm… I just made a big long post. It didn’t show up.
    Oh well, you guys would have probably slammed me for it, anyway.

    Reply
  38. K says

    September 1, 2015 at 9:58 pm

    This episode was a parade of relationships that will not survive.

    We already know Vicki and Brooks didn’t make it.

    Last season, Shannon seemed kooky in all her crazy Dr. Moon, crystal, holistic stuff. This season she is a body-shaming victim. She and David are never going to make it. (and the way they’ve involved their children in their drama is horrible).

    Tamar doesn’t tell Eddie about important decisions that she thinks he’ll disagree with. They will never make it.

    Lastly, Meghan won’t be worth putting up with for very long. I can’t see one speck of companionship there. He might not like being filmed but he can barely hide his disdain for her.

    Heather & Terri are the only ones I see together five years from now.

    Reply
    • sundayhare3 says

      September 1, 2015 at 11:32 pm

      Great observation and agreed. Most of these women have more chemistry with each other’s husbands than they do with their own.

      Reply
  39. Lorikaye says

    September 1, 2015 at 11:31 pm

    David might have looked hot at the sex party but who has such a strong hold on David that he would allow all of this embarrassing and humiliating stuff be aired for the world to see. From what I have read the money is from David’s side right ? Is it a strict conservative Papa of David that controls the money and gave an ultimatum ? LOL that is really a stupid guess but it is just mind blowing first that David would even tell Shannon that he had sex with her and then high tailed it over to another for round two but now not only the world of strangers are in on this disgusting revelation but his children and his children’s friends and we know how that will be on the kids. relentless bullies having a field day with that one. Crazy crazy crazy

    Reply
    • tamaratattles says

      September 2, 2015 at 12:17 am

      No it is Shannon’s father that has the money and her father has the majority share in David’s company.

      Reply
      • Lorikaye says

        September 2, 2015 at 1:35 am

        Oops But with the right information I now see why David is being such a yellow kind of guy. Follow the money … This makes way more sense than my thinking it had to do with some over the top religious conservative father LOL LOL way more sense Yak

        Reply
      • caroline says

        September 2, 2015 at 10:33 pm

        And that’s why David stays. So very sad. I’d love to see Shannon embrace the word divorce and get one. This forced reconciliation is just so hard to watch. Shannon repeatedly publicly humiliates David and he throws in subtle jabs like the birthday dinner in the bar.

        Reply
  40. cawoman23 says

    September 2, 2015 at 12:55 am

    While I will always feel awful for a woman who has been cheated on, the scenes with her and David are getting harder to watch. New drinking game: Take a drink every time Shannon says “my husband had an affair!”

    Reply
    • Lorikaye says

      September 2, 2015 at 1:40 am

      OK I played and amsowastedIcanbarelyseethe keys to write this. Hee hee

      Reply
  41. therealdeb says

    September 2, 2015 at 1:00 am

    My comments are not showing up!!!

    Reply
    • Maisey says

      September 2, 2015 at 1:58 am

      Umm…..well that one did, Deb!

      Reply
  42. MaryC says

    September 2, 2015 at 3:55 am

    Lol. That was funny. I liked how she ended with something like, “You have lovely breasts. “

    Reply
  43. MissMissy says

    September 2, 2015 at 1:32 pm

    Lizzie: “There’s a time to talk and there’s a time to shut up. And, Meghan, your time to shut up is right now.” And, “See, you don’t care that she’s upset. That’s the problem.”

    Go Lizzie! Anything short of what Lizzie or Shannon said to help Vicki at this luncheon proves these other women (Tamra, Heather) do not have Vicki’s best interests in mind. Vicki was spot on calling out that Meghan is not coming from a good place.

    Gross watching Heather try to defend. Gross watching other women gather around a crying Meghan to comfort her. God, I have never despised a HW as much as Meghan King (hopefully soon not-Edmonds). She is evil and tremendously stupid – a really horrid combination.

    Reply
    • librarygirl says

      September 2, 2015 at 5:36 pm

      Stupid, opinionated, and evil. Also incredibly self centered. She needs to go away.

      Reply
  44. Elsa says

    September 2, 2015 at 7:59 pm

    Meghan always has this mad spoiled child look on her face. She knows Vicki is dealing with the death of her mother and a sick loved one. Back off.
    When any of these ladies react to her immature behavior she digs in and makes it worse. Love when Vicki goes nuclear on somebody!! Don’t mess with the OG housewife!!!

    Reply
  45. Rose says

    September 2, 2015 at 9:16 pm

    Jim put the squash on Megan. Her spoiled little girl they’re picking on me act didn’t work. That man is so done with her. Heather seems to really enjoy the whole Megan, vicki, Shannon scenario under the guise of Megan only cares because of what Leeann is going through. ..looks like that’s her sneaky way of digging on Shannon and Vicki. ..sick.

    Reply
  46. Avery says

    September 2, 2015 at 9:53 pm

    This is a great recap! Thank you!

    Reply
  47. Shae says

    September 3, 2015 at 9:31 am

    You know you’re a special kind of annoying bitch when you’re barely tolerated by your new hubby of 4 months, the man has already had enough of you lol

    Reply
  48. Mills says

    September 3, 2015 at 10:11 am

    I despise Meghan for saying “Vicki is a bitch”, in that way she has of sounding like and looking like Beavis. She called her a bitch as she listened to Vicki sobbing in the background. Probably the most heartless and disgusting moment of rhoc, and that is saying a lot. Team Vicki all the way. They need to fire stupid Meghan and bring back Lizzie. Shut up Meg.

    Reply
    • Shae says

      September 4, 2015 at 9:10 am

      lmao @ Beavis, only he had the benefit of actually being funny.

      Reply
  49. Diana Ramirez says

    September 3, 2015 at 8:08 pm

    Had to have been one of the funniest things I’ve read in ages. That you so much. I can’t stand TamRat’s trashiness or Vicki’s screeching, but Meghan is literally to painful to watch. I still haven’t figured out why Vicki and Shannon haven’t ignored her completely whenever she speaks. She behaves like a bratty 4 year so maybe that the way they should treat her.

    BTW, can someone please just ?? the ? out of the f*cking idiot, Meghan for me, ????

    Reply

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