Look, I love me some Captain Lee, and the commercials with him for this season have been epic Love Boat throw back kind of stuff, but last season was some bullshit. I am not sure if I am going to recap this shit again if it is a crew that I would never want to cruise with acting like assholes. I got SO MUCH behind the scenes shit sent to me last season that I eventually decided not to post. I just can’t deal with another season of cruise crew going through people’s shit and mocking them, TV show or not. I know people who crew on cruises, I heard from them, I heard from guests on last season, I still have saved posts I have never pressed the publish button on. I’m going to try to give this a go. We shall see what happens and how long I am willing to support this show.
I’m exhausted today. I promise you I will have zero patience for this.
I want to attach Kate to an anchor and throw her overboard.
Oh Emile peaks my interest. So does Don. They should have led with these two.
Rocky and Connie seem cool. So I expect them to leave us soon.
Leon is not going to last long. I laugh at Captain Lee being able to pick the cast, come on Bravo, we are not stupid. Okay well we are stupid, but we are not naïve.
I want Kate to drown so very badly.
I wondered what happened to the Mediterranean version, it seems that is still an option that has not filmed. Now we are going to be in the fucking Bahamas which is like five feet off the shore of Florida. #Unimpressed
I want Kate to do a Game of Thrones sort of walk of shame down the dock where she is pelted with tomatoes and everyone screams foul epithets at her.
Eros is already the nicest boat so far.
Eddie is hot. Captain Lee is hotter. Everyone knows Leon was hired until the old chef whose name escapes me, is free to show up. So they are making him look like a dick. He does sort of look like a dick. Then they make Leon bunk with Kate. HOW MUCH IS LEON SUPPOSED TO TAKE FOR A SHORT TERM GIG? Bravo is a cruel mistress.
Amy and Eddie are reunited. Will they hook up?
I’d like to sell Kate to an ISIS faction somewhere in the middle east.
Connie knows Kate. Connie must die too. Sadly, that will not happen.
South Africa is a toxic environment? For a white guy?
I love you Rocky but I know you will be gone. Because I like you.
Connie would like us to know she is not a lesbian. Which means Connie is a lesbian who doesn’t know it yet. She loves Kate and hates the hot guys. I’m just saying.
Kate is already a cunt to Rocky. She wants her out. Or more accurately that is the script. I hate Bravo. Bravo is why we can’t have nice things like Leon, and Rocky. Don’t get too attached.
Captain gives the usual come to Jesus meeting. Don’t embarrass the boat. Only he did it all last season as did everyone else. I was embarrassed FOR them.
Emile is beautiful. I’d like you all to start a go fund me page for a chance to fuck him. I’d be fine with him just bucking up and getting it over with. Let’s make this happen.
Where was I? Oh the client. It’s Steve Bradley. He owns some luxury apartments in Mexico. He wants a foam party. UGH.
I love Leon.
On the larger boat, there aren’t bunk beds. they have so much more room but are side by side.
I want Kate to fall overboard and be eaten by sharks. I want this so much.
This boat is a huge upgrade. The guests seem great. And low maintenance. No Sonja-like unpacking even though it was offered.
Eddie and Don get into it. I think Don is both second in command of the boat, and second in command to Eddie when he is a deckhand. So that is weird. Does that ever happen?
If Kate was chopped up and used for chum, I’d be okay with that.
Steve WHO IS PAYING FOR THIS TRIP is wasted. And that’s just fine with me, but not with the staff.
Yes his foam party is a horrific idea BUT HE IS PAYING FOR THE TRIP. The foam party is a bust. Rocky gets it. She tries to make it happen. If it can’t happen on the trip that is THEIR problem.
I hate how they make fun of people getting wasted on this show. THAT IS THE WHOLE FUCKING POINT.
Emile and Rocky get in trouble I hate them all.