We begin tonight’s episode with Dorinda and Heather checking in to some sort of ginormous penthouse. Wait, that room was just for Carole? It’s like a whole apartment. Where is Dorinda staying? Carole goes by herself to pick up the ashes from the church. Carole is ridiculously nervous and saying silly things to the priest. As she is nervously chattering they show photos from her wedding day. Her husband had cancer when they married, but they both expected him to beat it. He finally gives her the urn, which is larger than expected. Carole takes it back to the hotel room and lays on her bed and cries.
Later, Dorinda and Carole meet up in Carole’s room. Where is Dorinda staying? In the maid’s quarters? They have the hotel send up tea and sandwiches and have a chat about their husbands.
The next day the ladies do a bit of shopping and the chat about Luann. Apparently the Countess has reappeared and no one is happy about it. After shopping, Dorinda is having a private cocktail party at an upscale bar. Carole invited some of her old friends from London as well. Dorinda’s friends are all very dignified. Carole’s guy friends were all in black leather. Dorinda’s friends brought up memories of her late husband. The cocktail party was more of a wake. I’m going to need someone to explain Carole’s ensemble to me.
Ramona and Sonja get together to discuss the upcoming presidential election and the pros and cons of each candidate. No wait, Sonja is schooling Ramona on the rules of a one night stand. Ramona is now denying sleeping with the dude in Turks and Caicos. Bethenny has sent two young men in suits to deliver each of them a dozen red roses, a bottle of SkinnyGirl something, and wrapped gift I am going to bet contains Skinnygirl crap. They are there to invite them to the SkinnyGirl infomercial for this episode.
Bethenny prepares for her party which is fairly elaborate. She has
hired invited a lot of single men. Ramona has already been pestering Bethenny for exactly what she wants the guys to look like. I hope Bethenny pays the guys extra for banging Ramona.
Ramona kind of walks like a male wrestler. How have I not noticed this before? She immediately starts bitching at Bethenny about the lack of hot men. Bethenny drags a hot guy over to Ramona and she rejects him to his face saying, “He’s a bartender!” Ramona leaves with her GBF or whoever that was because there were not any fuckable guys at the party. Like ships passing in the night, Sonja and Luann arrive about the same time.
Sonja starts inquiring about the guys who delivered the invitations. Sonja starts drinking and molesting the guys at the party. She breaks her tooth (again) biting the buttons off of some dudes shirt. Bethenny falls over in hysterics at the tale and her boob flops out of her one shoulder jumper. The guy with the shirt with the missing buttons slaps his hand on her tit to cover it from view. It was odd. He just stood there with his hand on her tit for an uncomfortably long time. At least Bethenny got felt up. Sorta.
Next Week: Sonja has a fashion show. Or tries to.