We begin tonight’s episode with Dorinda and Heather checking in to some sort of ginormous penthouse. Wait, that room was just for Carole? It’s like a whole apartment. Where is Dorinda staying? Carole goes by herself to pick up the ashes from the church. Carole is ridiculously nervous and saying silly things to the priest. As she is nervously chattering they show photos from her wedding day. Her husband had cancer when they married, but they both expected him to beat it. He finally gives her the urn, which is larger than expected. Carole takes it back to the hotel room and lays on her bed and cries.
Later, Dorinda and Carole meet up in Carole’s room. Where is Dorinda staying? In the maid’s quarters? They have the hotel send up tea and sandwiches and have a chat about their husbands.
The next day the ladies do a bit of shopping and the chat about Luann. Apparently the Countess has reappeared and no one is happy about it. After shopping, Dorinda is having a private cocktail party at an upscale bar. Carole invited some of her old friends from London as well. Dorinda’s friends are all very dignified. Carole’s guy friends were all in black leather. Dorinda’s friends brought up memories of her late husband. The cocktail party was more of a wake. I’m going to need someone to explain Carole’s ensemble to me.
Ramona and Sonja get together to discuss the upcoming presidential election and the pros and cons of each candidate. No wait, Sonja is schooling Ramona on the rules of a one night stand. Ramona is now denying sleeping with the dude in Turks and Caicos. Bethenny has sent two young men in suits to deliver each of them a dozen red roses, a bottle of SkinnyGirl something, and wrapped gift I am going to bet contains Skinnygirl crap. They are there to invite them to the SkinnyGirl infomercial for this episode.
Bethenny prepares for her party which is fairly elaborate. She has hired invited a lot of single men. Ramona has already been pestering Bethenny for exactly what she wants the guys to look like. I hope Bethenny pays the guys extra for banging Ramona.
Ramona kind of walks like a male wrestler. How have I not noticed this before? She immediately starts bitching at Bethenny about the lack of hot men. Bethenny drags a hot guy over to Ramona and she rejects him to his face saying, “He’s a bartender!” Ramona leaves with her GBF or whoever that was because there were not any fuckable guys at the party. Like ships passing in the night, Sonja and Luann arrive about the same time.
Sonja starts inquiring about the guys who delivered the invitations. Sonja starts drinking and molesting the guys at the party. She breaks her tooth (again) biting the buttons off of some dudes shirt. Bethenny falls over in hysterics at the tale and her boob flops out of her one shoulder jumper. The guy with the shirt with the missing buttons slaps his hand on her tit to cover it from view. It was odd. He just stood there with his hand on her tit for an uncomfortably long time. At least Bethenny got felt up. Sorta.
Next Week: Sonja has a fashion show. Or tries to.
Sonja has a fashion show? I have to see this. One thing that people can’t complain about with B, at least her infomercials are for real products. If they annoy the HWs imagine how irritating it must be to make time for the fake events Sonja throws.
If she walks even ONE dress, she’ll still be ahead of Sheree.
True, but getting one dress out on the runway looked like too much for her.
On Tue, Jul 28, 2015 at 11:37 PM, Tamara Tattles wrote:
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A fashion show with no fashions, how dreadful.
Bethenny comparing getting Ramona laid to Saving Private Ryan was hilarious.
People may accuse Bethenny of being neurotic, cray, whatever… But I think she is the funniest, and probably smartest housewife hands down.
She is crazy, she is insecure, she is a controlling bitch, but she is funny as hell. The on liners crack me up, she is who she is and I have a love/hate relationship with her.
I agree. She also owns her flaws.
Totally agree! She is so quick with her humor and spot on.
Bethenny was hilarious. Her Ramona imitation…perfect!
Xanadude’s Quick Hits:
-Last week Kristen bronzed three pufferfish and called it a necklace, this week Dorinda did the same with Cleopatra’s asp.
-Carole really comes alive picking up her dead husbands ashes – this isn’t a dig- Carole really shines in the#Bountyse quieter, more introspective storylines, proving you don’t have to be bombastic to be interesting.
-One of Dorinda’s London friends play Match Game: Dorinda, When I first met John, you said her was Fat, Armenian, and Had a BLANK. I was waiting for Brett Somers and Charles Nelson Reilly to retort. Then I realized that TT is Brett Somers and I’m Charles Nelson Reilly.
-What up with the random couple hugging in London that was in a too long cutaway?
-Sonja’s new intern came to her from Benihana via Jamaica, based on her headscarf.
-Sonja’s newest business venture? Whore School. First student? Ramona
-Memories of their late husbands make Doris and Carole hungry.
-I think Bethenney just needs to go full on Pewdiepie and just comment on each episode from a box in the upper corner of the screen
-Ramona IS the girl you wish you hadn’t started a conversation with at a party
-There may be a bounty on Ramona’s vagina but no one’s paying it.
-Bounty on Ramona’s vagina – the Quicker Picker Upper
-Bounty on Ramona’s vagina – Dog and Beth couldn’t find it
#Bountyonramonasvagina is the new #mikeshouhedisdrunk
-Random shots of Ramona chugging vodka explain the random shots of Ramona dancing
-You know all the shirtless guys at the party? Afterparty at BoyBar
-LuAnn’s statement necklace/weapon of the week was the fifty pieces of gold it takes to pay the #bountyonramonasvagina
Omg a Pewdiepie reference. He is an online god!!
I prefer other youtubers, but you can’t fault his multimillion dollar business plan.
Gene, I said “big dick.”
On Tue, Jul 28, 2015 at 10:48 PM, Tamara Tattles wrote:
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Gene, I have “big dick,” too.
Richard Dawson should have gotten that right. The only alternate answer is “black card.” Dick is high a lot when we play though, so…
On Wed, Jul 29, 2015 at 12:34 AM, Tamara Tattles wrote:
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I’ll take the Richard Dawson/Bill Daly/Dick Martin chair, please!
I said, “Hookup for abandoned couture”, Gene!
And the Fannie Flagg/Marcia Wallace/Betty White chair goes to……?
(Just curious who I’ll be sitting next to!)
I’m actually much more Fannie Flagg that Brett Somers. Brett is a Yankee/Canookian for fucks sake.
On Wed, Jul 29, 2015 at 12:14 AM, Tamara Tattles wrote:
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During my college/just out of college days, my friends and i became OBSESSED with Match Game. We’d have Match Game parties – arranged the furniture so we had a tier (couch in front, three chair behind). Rule was we had to watch a new to GSN episode. We made buttons with the panelists names and drew them out of a hat at the beginning of the show – whoever we drew we played as. If we matched the celebrity, we got a…prize. Of the VPR variety, if you catch my snowdrift. If we didn’t match, we had to take a shot.
The 80s were the best. Seriously. There was a lot of snow before global warming.
On Wed, Jul 29, 2015 at 12:33 AM, Tamara Tattles wrote:
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TT Match Game: Top Row would be Michael, Lady Coquette in the Brett Somers Seat, Xanadude in the CNR set. Bottom Row: Uretha, then Rotating Guest Seat, then TT in the Fannie Flag seat.
Eric is between me and Urethra. He’s Richard Dawson. You have Urethra in a chick seat. And TC is Brett Somers. TOTALLY.
On Wed, Jul 29, 2015 at 1:18 AM, Tamara Tattles wrote:
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I would watch this.
I thought Brett Somers was Charles Nelson Reilly in drag.
Oh, I’m definitely Brett Somers! I’ll bring my collection of eyeglasses & wigs.
Hilariously laughing at the first three comments.
@[email protected]@xanadude
Ramona will never get the man she thinks she deserves, that ship sailed.
I disagree. Ramona is nuts but I think she could find a nice man her own age divorced and date him, go to dinner and travel with him. I could see her doing that.
I think that is exactly what she is going for. This Ramona is a slut thing is not what she is going for. She’s uptight and cringes even talking about sex. I don’t really picture her as a party girl except to drink and flirt. We all know the type. Perhaps I am wrong be she seems to think that she is above all of that. She told Andy that she is looking for a settled, refined, successful business man. Good, message rec’d. Bartenders and other folks beneath her need not reply. Good news for the other girls tho, lol.
@Jen, what would a nice guy want with an ill-mannered, foot-in-mouth disease affected, inappropriate person like Ramona? Unless he wants to permanently place his balls in her purse. I normally look down on cheaters but in the cases of Ramona and Shannon Beador, I completely understand the impulse. These men don’t want to leave but hope their affair will jolt their partners into caring.
I don’t see how this could happen. Ramona has zero social skills and any man who dated and/or travelled with her would have to be willing to put up with her obnoxious antics. What she will find is her own lacky in male form and she will drive him crazy.
Yveline—-
The answer to your question is: Greg Leakes.
Your welcome.
Why on Earth would a nice man like that want to put up with Ramona??
Tamara saying TC for Brett Somers….made me pee my pants just a little. That was so on point… certainly,TOTALLY!
Oh come on
I think Dorinda’s friend said Dorinda said “fat, rich, American, with…”
That comment makes me look at Dorinda with a side eye. But I’m sure she learned to love him. Doesn’t she look 20years younger than him.
She said fat, rich, Armenian. She was referring to John, not the deceased husband.
Now that Dorinda and the Gaga are friends, Dorinda is now my second fav NY HW.
I know right? It’s also scary weird how much alike the two look.
She could be Gaga’s mum.
She does! LVP hangs with Gaga too maybe all three could get martinis together?!
Ramona is still a crack, they will never get her laid
Carol is so incredibly boring and please woman fix your teeth! I hope Ramona never gets laid, or at least only if she has to pay for it.Shes just so full of herself!
… and not enough room for a man.
@spring2 Fix your teeth? Really? Jesus.
Thank you Katherine. Apparently everyone must look like that cat lady with all the surgeries. No one should deviate from the mold. There are plenty of things to poke Carole about in most episodes, but when all you have is you don’t like her teeth?
On Wed, Jul 29, 2015 at 9:33 AM, Tamara Tattles wrote:
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I agree. Her teeth are fine. I have a huge overbite and it is a massive undertaking to fix this – and painful – no, thank you. I’ll keep my overbite.
I swear that I must be the only person on the face of the earth that thinks that Carole is attractive. Not everyone has to have the look that is featured on the left coast HW. Also, I thought that her wedding photos were stunning. I may not like some of the pot stirring that Carole does, but she seems to be an intelligent, interesting lady when she is filmed one on one with the other ladies.
I think ANY of them look bad with bad lighting. In reality TV, there will be unflattering lighting and angles. Let’s face it: overhead fluorescent lighting or overcast gray natural light is no one’s friend.
Carole looks like Carly Simon with her hair lightened… and I mean that in a good way.
I think Carole is lovely and REAL. She looks like herself and is clearly comfortable with herself. I think I’ve said it here before somewhere, but I’ll say it again – the photos of her and Anthony, especially at their wedding, are some of the lovely wedding photos I’ve seen because of the love that just shines from them. It is clear that he loved her deeply, and she loved him.
I felt badly for her when she said the last weeks of his life, she didn’t feel that she was supportive enough. She didn’t spell it out – but clearly that was b/c they were also dealing with the loss of JFK Jr. and Carolyn.
Carole has the Carly Simon overbite.
I’m with you, Librarygirl. Carole was a lovely bride. They were a handsome young couple on the verge of a wonderful life together. And…um…I was much better looking 15 years ago; if we live long enough, we all age. “The innocent and the beautiful have no enemy but time.” Yeats
I notice her teeth also. Everybody else is knocking Ramona’s strange walk. I don’t see it. I think Ramona is very pretty, and Carole has awkward teeth.
Those photos of Anthony and Carole – so beyond anything ever. The look on his face when he was captured on film looking at her and not only her look but body language in his presence – we could all be so blessed and lucky to be someone’s beloved at that level and for them to be your beloved as well. Photographic proof of love at its deepest.
As much I’ve been questioning whether or not I like Dorinda based on her nasty tweets and crazy T & C behavior – felt like her scenes with Carole were more of a beautiful PBS documentary on young widows and cancer than the Real Housewives. I laugh and yell and cuss at the drama – but it is scenes like them sharing some of the barest, most real moments of their lives on the bed while sharing tea that grab me completely.
This was probably my favorite episode of the season. The scenes with Carol and Dorinda were great, Bethenney’s one liners were hysterical and Ramona left the party early – yay!
I am sorry for your loss.
Ramona walks like a toddler with a poopy diaper. Maybe she got vaginal rejuvenation surgery and needs to walk like that until she heals?
I found the conversation with Carole and Dorinda very moving. Two young widows sharing war wounds. I was peeling some oinions at the time and…..
OOH Josie, you might be kidding, but that does seem like something Ramona would include in her post divorce plastic surgery makeover. She really was walking weird.
It’s late (or early) and this is probably a ridiculous theory but it would not surprise me.
On Wed, Jul 29, 2015 at 4:53 AM, Tamara Tattles wrote:
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Yep, I could totally see her doing it in her post-divorce makeover! ☺
You are right Tamara. Ramona has always walked funny. When I read your post, I thought it was kind of strange that it hasn’t ever come up before. Cause that ho looks like she has been rode hard and put up wet. Oldie but goody….:)
Ramona has always walked like a line backer. It is part and parcel of what seems to be an awkwardness with her own body. She is just not a graceful female.
Could be but TT, Do you think the old vaj saw enough action to require a rejuvenation? Maybe she has hemmorids?
Ramona has always walked like a linebacker. Thanks for putting the words to my thoughts!
Their conversation was the real deal, and yes, it did bring up memories for me of my recent loss as well. But for me it was comforting that truths were discussed regarding the death of a loved one, especially following a long illness: the phone calls, the fear, and finally the relief and release that happens when the suffering ends. Thanks ladies, you made my week.
I agree – very real and raw.
That’s Lisa Lampanelli in the photo with Ramona. If not, she’s got an identical twin.
Yes! I’ve been waiting for someone to notice LL.
I searched – but found no reference to her being on the show / being at the party. I was only 1/2 watching last night so I didn’t notice her – but when I saw the pic (above) I was surprised no one mentioned her.
I didn’t mind the lack of screen time for Kristen and Heather.
Ramona has all the physical and social graces of a bull in a china shop lol
The woman confounds me, everything about her is so awkward and odd.
I didn’t get to finish last night because I got home too late, but wtf is up with sonja’s tooth always coming out? I assume it’s a cap? a dental implant?
Recall her saying she uses veterinarian services for her tooth.
Um, ok. The reasoning behind which I cannot even imagine lol
Shae, Sonja loves boosting of her frugal nature. I doubt her statement, probably just smart mouth comment.
I think it was on WWHL that Sonja mentioned she would be getting an implant.
Didn’t she go in someplace to have her veneer fixed on that tooth? No matter what the issue is, GET IT FIXED.
Carole looks good, love how she dresses, except the pink sweater.
Wish Bethany could get her home back from Jason. It makes no sense he gets to keep it.
At least be forced to sell it.
Has it been decided that he gets to keep it? I haven’t seen anything recently, I thought it was still in dispute. I know he’s still living in it that grimy bastard.
I wanted her to get the grey one that Dorinda talked her out of. I looked them up online and they are 300 pounds each. And they only come in S, M and L.
On Wed, Jul 29, 2015 at 11:19 AM, Tamara Tattles wrote:
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Ramona doesn’t have an ounce of grace, physically or socially. She is just so obnoxious I don’t know how anyone can stand to be around her for more than 5 minutes.
That’s so true, Twilly. It’s like she was created in a lab using parts from different people sewed together. Frankinmona. But sitting still, with her mouth shut, she looks fabulous.
ha! you nailed it lol
Hugs to you
No snark – Carole’s Bravo blog is up, and it is inspiring and touching.
It is. And Luann gave her hug and then smacked her in the head. What a bitch.
Was just reviewing the comments to see if anyone else had read Luanne’s shade. What a bitch! Plus there are others who are throwing some shade at Carole on twitter (but many more are supporting her) – including that it isn’t “her story to tell” but the Kennedys (yes, I know, Anthony wasn’t a Kennedy – these people are stupid).
I think Carole is beautiful and bright. She owns her unique features and is aging gracefully. In photos of her 20s ishe looks so much like her mother-in-law. I’d much rather celebrate women like her than another fake blonde with giant bubbies and a pumpkin head from a zillion injections.
True. Her look might not be my particular taste, but she has the beauty of someone who is comfortable in her own skin, being who she is, and that is extremely rare and attractive. I give her tons of credit.
Ramona reminds me of an intelligent co-worker with whom I became close friends. She was attractive, had a great body, wore sexy clothes, was very out-going and “hip” and liked to drink a lot. But she was not into her husband.of several years. Then, as risque as she was in public, she revealed to me that she actually disliked sex. I’d get her cast-offs when the two of us went out. Reminds me of Ramona
I freaking love this season!
Maybe ramona had a vag rejuvination? Which would explain the crazy walk
Watching this episode I feel very sad for Carol and Dorinda. How dreadful to lose your husband to cancer.
I love both Carol & Dorinda, carol is such a laidback girl who would be a great girlfriend, Nothing is a bother to carol she is so relaxed. Dorinda is pretty fabulous. I love Dorinda’s smokey voice, she always looks beautiful. How i wish i was dorinda’s bestie getting her hand-me-downs!