Time for a new episode of Southern Charm! Is it me or did the ratings spike when I started recapping. I’m so excited to get to see Jekyll Island. It’s been several years since I’ve been there. I used to go to the beach there a lot when I lived on Saint Simons Island. At that time houses were cheap, there was little development. The beaches were gorgeous and deserted. I sort of don’t like it getting all of this attention. They do have a lot of sharks there though. For real. Same with Saint Simons. People would catch huge sharks right down the street from my condo in the channel between Jekyll and SSI.
Whitney tries to explain his douchebaggery of last week to no avail. Cameron has to learn to stop BLOWING THE HORN in residential neighborhoods when picking someone up. Everyone discusses the Delaware trip in the car except for the car Kathryn is in, where they talk about how she is going to be around Whitney. Shep is pushing Craig to study for the bar. Craig as it turns out did NOT sit for the bar in February according to him. It’s either that or he didn’t pass. Craig says he will take it in July.
They Gang Arrives At The Club at Jekyll
OOHHH They are staying at Jekyll Club. I am jealous already. Craig is freaking out that it is not a party scene. It is VERY laid back on Jekyll. I don’t think there is even a bar in Jekyll other than in the club. I’ve never seen the trolley. I think that must be new. The audio is off on this show. Is it my cable connection? Kathryn and her friend arrive last and overdressed and are pissed that everyone is biking without them. They can’t seem to find the beach which is not as dumb as it seems. There is no one beach. You pull over and park in some Palmettos and look for a break in the bushes and head to the water. However, the road is a big circle around the island you have to be on the Oceanside of the island to find the beach.
Meanwhile, Thomas is campaigning. Which is ridiculous. He has no chance at beating Lindsey Graham. Zero percent possibility. And there is no way he spent a million dollars to find this out.
Shep Mocks Craig
The crew gives up on the beach. They have a lovely dinner at the club. Shep is mimicking Craig behind his back to the others. Shep and Craig are having a bromance spat. Craig tries to make a toast/apology and Shep mocks him. Shep’s manners have completely disappeared.
Craig and Kathryn share some friendly banter across the table. I know Craig is supposed to be smart, but his speech, in general, not the speech, doesn’t reflect his purported intelligence. Cameran, who is smart says her good nights and goes to bed at a reasonable hour. The guys drink on the porch and talk about Kathryn. Craig is defending her to Whitney.
Whitney Trash Talks Kathryn
Kathryn comes out and jumps on Whitney and tells her he needs to go home and take lessons from his mother (who by the way has not been on this episode). Shep is kind of a dick this episode. Whitney and Kathryn fight over their man. Whitney tells Kathryn she needs to be with her husband and family. Kathryn is drunk and takes off on foot. Kathryn runs drunk through the property. So uncool. Craig meets up with Kathryn and her friend on the grounds and gives them more wine.
The quote of the night is from Kathryn. “You really think I’m a gold digger? I’m wearing Target pants!” If I were a gold digger, I’d buy those Target pants in every color. Craig and Kathryn are both wasted and Kathryn’s friend leaves them alone together.
The next morning the gang finds out that Craig and Kathryn took off on the golf cart and it “broke down” so they spent the night on the beach. This is not the kind of beach you want to spend the night on. There is wildlife EVERYWHERE. It’s not like they were miles away from the property. It’s an easy drunken stumble back to the cottage.
The next day they play croquet on the grounds. Everyone is attacking Craig because they think he hooked up with Kathryn. Kathyrn is passed out. But then, Thomas gets accused of assault by Kathryn’s friend the hair stylist. Oven incident that happened before the weekend get away. You can see a video of the incident here where Thomas, Kathryn and Lauren were drunk at the house on Charlotte after Thomas had fallen into the pool with the baby. Warning, Thomas is butt assed naked (but blurred) in the video.
Kathryn is broken up with Thomas. This is true, but they broke up a month before the assault thing became public. Thomas loses the election. Duh. And Whitney is trying to console him at the campaign headquarters when Kathryn has the audacity to interrupt Whitney’s private time with Thomas. Kathryn says to a group of her friends at the campaign party that no one knows what she has had to deal with during the campaign and Landon tells Kathryn it is not all about her. Kathryn promptly shows Landon the door. And her middle finger.