Okay, it’s finally time for part three of the RHOA. If you missed the other recaps you can catch them here. Just in time for Mother’s Day, Nene is going to decide she has issues with her mother abandoning her for the first time.
Nene and Peter
Nene begins screaming at top of her lungs that she never flirted with Peter. SCREAMING her lies as if that would make them true. Peter says that he and Nene have similar personalities just like Kenya and Apollo do. Um what? The Peter says that everyone owes Kenya an apology for calling her a whore for all these seasons. Peter says that he a Nene did not flirt. Peter says that Porsha has a reckless mouth saying he is cheating on his wife. He says if he is going to cheat on his wife, he is going to go hit something big, like J-Lo not waitresses. Oh well if I was Cynthia, I’d feel so much better. WTF. Peter?
Kandi and Todd
Time for more about Kandi’s marriage. Andy asks when the last time they had sex was. Two nights ago. Todd says the baby will happen soon. Andy gives condolences about Todd’s mother, Sharon dying. He tells the story of how he found out. He sent a neighbor in to check on her and she had a stroke. Gregg spoke at Todd’s mother’s funeral. Why? And Peter also came for the funeral. Nene tried everything she could to get to the funeral but she was in Cinderella at the time. Phaedra made a phone call to a funeral home for Todd. Todd is teary-eyed. Todd says that MJ’s TV apology was half-assed but she apologized more genuinely after Sharon died. Todd and Kandi fight about the prenup again. Apparently, Todd doesn’t wear his wedding ring and he has more than one ring to match each watch. That’s weird. More talk about how Kandi puts too much of the relationship on TV. Kandi says her boobs are bigger because she has gained weight and is taking steroids.
Nene and Cynthia
Andy says he doesn’t get why it is over. Was it about Nene calling Peter a bitch? Nene said that after Gregg and Peter got into it in Mexico she called Cynthia crying on the phone. Nene felt like things got out of hand. Things were fine between her and Cynthia until the show aired and then suddenly Cynthia was done being her friend. Nene mentions something about going to Vegas with Cynthia and Peter and Cynthia had said something about Noelle and Arthur and not wanting a grandbaby. Then at the last reunion Nene says that Cynthia asked not to be seated next to Nene. Nene was blindsided. Nene is a victim of mean old Cynthia, y’all.
Cynthia says she never requested to have her seat changed because she didn’t know where she was going to be placed. She also didn’t know there was an option that people could request certain seats. Cynthia sat where she was told. Andy says they do not have the option of selecting or changing their seat. Cynthia has way too much dark contouring on her boobs. Cynthia tells a whole long story that ends with Gregg and Peter fighting in Mexico. Cynthia says she wants to be very clear because she doesn’t want to keep answering this question. So they were all in Vegas when the show aired where Cynthia said she didn’t want Noelle getting pregnant. Nene for some dumb reason took that as an insult and blogged about it that night. Cynthia said they were in the same hotel on vacation together, but Nene did not address it with her there, instead she took it to the blogs. Cynthia says after that things just weren’t the same.
Cynthia’s mother responded to Nene trash talking Cynthia on WWHL by saying she was mean-spirited. Cynthia says after they fell out she didn’t go around trying to get Cynthia kicked off the show. Nene denies it but she said in on a dozen different talk shows. Cynthia calls her out on her lie. They play a clip of Nene trash talking and Nene starts over talking Cynthia with the whole “You’re right, I’m wrong.”
Andy says that Porsha went from pampered princess to Princess of Thotland. Porsha smiles like this is a compliment. They play a montage of Porsha explaining to Nene was a THOT is and every single cast member calling her a THOT and her calling herself a THOT like it’s a title to be envied. Andy makes fun of the shorts Porsha wore in Thailand. Porsha says she broke the zipper on her denim shots and so she put on her swim shorts. She blames the cameraman for not telling her that her ass was hanging out. Really? Nene calls Andy on his shade to Porsha. Nene says Porsha went from not being allowed to go to strip clubs to dancing at them. Porsha says Nene can show her some tricks. Phaedra who has her back to Andy the WHOLE reunion high fives Porsha. After what I posted today I am reading a whole lot more into Phaedra literally turning her back on Andy the whole show. There does seem to be tension between Phaedra and Andy. Porsha asks how she felt seeing her grandfather portrayed in Selma. She went with her whole family and she was proud.
Puerto Rico Trip
Next up is the shade war in Puerto Rico. They play a long montage and Andy asks Phaedra why she thought that Nene lost that battle to Claudia. Kandi says that Claudia is very quick with a comeback. She thought it was funny and Claudia did her thing. Claudia is grinning, Nene is pissed. Andy asks Claudia what she thought when Nene said her clit had left her body. Claudia says she thought it was stupid and it doesn’t make sense but Nene was grasping at straws at that point. You can almost see Nene trying to remember the phrase “grasping at straws” to use at a later date.
Andy says he got many comments and questions saying that Nene calling Claudia a half-breed was racist and shocking behavior. Nene says that when they were over in Puerto Rico, Claudia didn’t care that she called her a half-breed. Nene says Claudia always talks about being biracial. The only thing Claudia was upset about was Nene calling her a whore. Andy says someone says they are biracial doesn’t mean you can call them a half-breed. Nene says when you are arguing it’s a battle of words and that is what came out. Kandi’s face looks horrified that Nene is again refusing to acknowledge her remarks and apologize. Andy asks if she would like to apologize for the comment. Nene says she will apologize to the viewers and gives a whole long speech even using the some of my best friends are biracial card and ends with but that comment never bothered Claudia. Claudia says Nene doesn’t know what bothered her because she has never spoken to her about it. But she can barely be heard because Nene is screaming over the top of Claudia while she was trying to talk.
Nene gives her blood clot speech about how she couldn’t go on the flight despite the fact that she is on blood thinners. Lots of y’all seem to believe her, but it’s simply not true. EVERYONE needs to get up and walk every few hours on those long flight or risk getting blood clots. As long as she takes her meds and moves around the plane every few hours. She could have gone. Andy calls Kandi out for saying Kenya has a lopsided but while they were riding the tiny horses. Everyone feels like the absence of Nene on the trip made things go much easier.
They talk about the reconciliation between Kenya and Phaedra not lasting. Kenya said when they came back they were in a good place and went to each others events. After watching the episodes, things seem to go back to where they were.
There are only seven minutes left in the show so it is time for Nene’s meltdown. Dr. Jeff comes out and Nene gives him the cold shoulder. Nene goes into her spiel about how wrong it was for Dr. Jeff to let everyone air their grievances about Nene. She says it was all about trauma in everyone else’s life and never about trauma in hers. Claudia says that is not true. Nene tells Claudia she is talking. Nene starts to choke up. She says she doesn’t want to be the victim. The entire left couch, especially Kandi is giving this performance the side eye. Dr. Jeff said he knew about Nene’s mother and her issues with abandonment. He says the reason that he had everyone speak first is so she could address each of them about her feelings of abandonment and how she felt betrayed. Dr. Jeff is back paddling. Porsha gives some crazy version of events. And Kandi stops her and says she was there and she has no memory of the situation going they way they are describing. What happened was as soon as Dr. Jeff said he was not on anyone’s side and he was there for everyone Nene had a hissyfit and left.
Nene looks like she is on something and she is about ready to explode. Her face is red, her eyes are glassy and she’s a ticking time bomb. Why is Dr. Jeff not noticing this? Okay Dr. Jeff asks her how she is feeling and she starts to cry. Now I believe this was a genuine reaction. We all know when you are holding a lot in and someone asks how you are, that will open the flood gates.
Cynthia gives a sweet speech to Nene about her accomplishments. She stresses how hard it must be to reach all of these goals without a mother’s support. It is really quite touching. Nene is quietly crying lots and lots of real tears. Kenya then gives a whole speech about how they have issues in common concerning them both being abandoned by their mothers. Nene has not said a word in five minutes are more. She is just crying her eyes out. She stands up and grabs for Dr. Jeff’s hand and says ” I can’t. ” Nene stands there and cries while Dr. Jeff comforts her. everyone moves in to group hug except for Andy, Kandi and Claudia. Kenya practically shames Kandi into joining the circle telling Kandi that she is hurting, and you know starting her story line for next season as Nene’s newest BFF. So Claudia gets up too.
Nene keeps saying she can’t talk about her mom. Someone needs to cover her left nipple. Cynthia, Phaedra and Porsha walk her to her car with Dr. Jeff. Kenya, Kandi and Claudia continue the show with Andy. Because she show must go on. Andy never even left his chair. Gregg shows up at the car and Nene sobs in his arms. Porsha is saying stupid shit to Nene. Nene goes back in to get her makeup. Andy hears she is back in the building and goes for the money shot. Andy gets there in time to interview Gregg about Nene’s backstory. How is it possible Andy doesn’t know this. Nene’s mother had five kids she could not afford so she sent two to Athens to be raised by her aunt. Nene has always wondered why she was one of the ones sent away.
Evventually, Nene gets her makeup touched up and goes back out to the couch like a pro. Okay, now Nene is giving this speech in her fakeass valley girl talk show voice. She thinks she has been misunderstood. Nene says she doesn’t talk about things she has been through in her life. Cynthia gives a lovely supportive speech. Dr. Jeff says that other cast mates from previous seasons betrayed her after she got them on the show. Kenya and Claudia both open up to Nene and say nice things. Kandi is still there wondering if she is in the twilight zone. Dr. Jeff is annoying as fuck. Andy is dismissing him from the show, but not before Nene tries to get Dr. Jeff to say he did the “cancelling” wrong. Dr. Jeff says now that he knows more about her needs any good doctor would accommodate the patients needs to get them blah blah blah. Nene says “okay, I accept that.” Jesus. I was starting to like her for all of five minutes and then she goes right back to Nene.
In the final remarks, Cynthia apologizes to Phaedra. Kenya says something about how she learned to never say never. Nene says it was great that all the ladies were supportive. She mentions everyone except Kandi. Andy forces a group hug. Kandi is not about it at all.
Well that was interesting.