Okay the dude is Jamey and he lives in Houston. He met Ari on Plenty of Fish. She is very pretty. She also lives in Houston. Um, WTF? Same town, never met? Neither of them have a car and transportation is a problem. This is some stupid shit already. So Jamey need the boys to give him a ride over to Ari’s place? Do they not have cab money between the two of them? This season is ridiculous but for some reason I am really enjoying it.
Ari has a secret. She says it would be a good idea for them to meet on Catfish because she has a secret. I’m going with born a man. Or possibly she has AIDS. They video chat and she is who she says.
Off to Houston we go to Jamey’s job. He is a meat cutter, which he claims is different from being a butcher. He is not the brightest bulb oh the Christmas tree. He’s in love. They both have traumatic pasts. He is very uncomfortable on camera and didn’t really want to go this route.
Ari only shows her face on Skype. They suspect maybe she is fat. Or pregnant. Jamey says that Ari claims to be a virgin. Ari says that he is going to be angry with her.
The boys start trying to uncover Ari’s secret. They contact some of her Facebook friends. There is something on Facebook about her “in-laws.” She appears to be married. Sophia, Ari’s friend calls. She hangs up on them when they ask about Caz the possible husband. She basically says they will all find out the truth from Ari when they meet her.
Ari freaks out for no apparent reasons and starts sending Jamey fuck you texts. That’s odd. Jamey says that is out of character. Nev calls Ari and she is freaking out. She says this was all a big mistake and hangs up. The next day they call her again. She apologizes. She asks if she can meet Nev and Max alone first. They agree.
So they go to meet Ari at a park. Where is the body of water? They always meet by a lake or a pond or an ocean or something. Ari is heavier than in her pictures, but the real reason is that she is transgender. She is taking hormones but has not had the surgery. I hate that the guys are going to tell Jamey in advance. I think Ari should be the one to do that.
They just come straight tell Jamey. He asks if she was born a hermaphrodite. He doesn’t use that word. Jamey walks away to smoke and cry and cuss.
Eventually, the go to meet Ari. That was weird. Jamey was very kind and understanding. Ari got very camera shy and didn’t want to talk to him a bolted.
Jamey is such a sweetheart. Ari missed a great opportunity. Jamey says they still talk here and there but not as much as they used to. Jamey says he hopes this lets people know that there are good people out there that are not judgmental. Ari seems to see the situation as Jamey breaking up with her. They certainly did not show that. She says is okay with just being friends with Jamey now.
The next week the non-hetero sorts of episode continue.
What an incredibly understanding guy. She is not going to be able to find a lot of guys that cool when info is sprung on them like that. I was wondering if maybe he was in the closet himself because he really kinda seemed to be proposing some kind of relationship moving forward. I think he was willing to give it a try. Either way he was very sweet about it all. I feel for Ari what a hard situation for someone so young. Just wanting to be accepted for who you are the inside and longing for the outside to match your inner self.
Jamey was so kind and brave to treat her like a person even knowing his friends and the world would find out his secret. That is rare. I don’t think it means he’s gay. But who cares. (Anne Heche defense;)
I thought it was great to have the Catfish middle man to disburse the anger. The cool down definately helped and gave him a chance to reflect.
So happy that the transgendered woman movement is getting stronger. Hope Bruce Jenner helps move them ahead a few years and it eventually becomes no big deal like the gay movement. I had a transgendered friend 20years ago who just wanted love but only got criticism and bullying. It was terrifying being out with her because I didn’t want men to think I was one too and get beat up alongside her. I was young back then. Now I’d defend her to the death along with knives, mace, and shame on yous!
But I’m so proud of Jamey. Wish Ari didn’t act so stupid and would’ve embraced the moment. But hey — youth.
If you’re not already familiar with the story of Barry Winchell, I suggest you check it out. He was a straight man in the Army who, while out at a strip club with fellow soldiers, fell for an exotic dancer, who he didn’t realize was a transgender woman. The events from there are heartbreaking, but are worth knowing, remembering, and sharing.
TT, I recorded this one bc it was in Houston. How the heck did u call this one so quickly? I usually can call the outcome but they got me on this one bc I was convinced she was going to end up married, not trans. You is good! Lol
Mostly because the whole season is about gay/bisexual/trans folks it seems. At least a lot more than usual.
On Thu, Apr 23, 2015 at 9:39 PM, Tamara Tattles wrote:
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Good point. I kind of only half-assed watched this season since Max was gone. Plus the lightening outed my cable so last week it didn’t record. So, glad you recap this, too. I do think I remember telling you that my DVR must be a mirror image of yours! Haha!
Yes! We have a lot in common. Stay strong. You will fit in fine. You just have to learn your way around the prison yard. 🙂
On Thu, Apr 23, 2015 at 10:52 PM, Tamara Tattles wrote:
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I just watched this. I had to record on a later airing. I am confused. Ari said she is in love with Jamie. Once she meets him, and he seems willing to give romance a chance, Ari is not interested. Why? Was there no chemistry for her in person, or what?
This season is so off balance, will Nev and Max next be telling us they were born Geneva snd Maxine?
I am years late to this discussion, but just saw the episode air today. I was confused, too, about why they didn’t go forward with dating when Jamey seemed so open and understanding. But, after rewinding it a few times, I noticed that when they first met face to face, Jamey said he was sorry because he had hoped they could move forward or have something.
It was quick and subtle, but had the vibe that he was saying he wasn’t interested in anything romantic anymore. Nothing said about whether it was because she is transgender female, or because he wasn’t attracted to her when he could see more than her face, or whether he couldn’t go forward feeling like there had been a breach of trust because Ari didn’t tell him her history before then.
I was glad to see such an understanding person, who treated her with dignity and respect. I’m usually disappointed when people who connect so deeply emotionally and intellectually are derailed over whether there is immediate physical attraction. I do understand the frustration over being lied to.
I hope things have continued to go well for each of them in the years since the original airing.
Awww makes me sad. He was willing to give her a shot. Why did she not take it? He is such a nice guy I hope he finds love soon.
The meat cutter vs. butcher was odd to me also.
I did not see Transgender coming in this episode. I was at a loss of what her secret was.
I think the butcher is the one that processes the animal right after death. I think hunters call it “dressing”. When the meat cutters get it, it is usually a side of beef, if a cow, the butcher has previously skinned and removed the unedibles, cleaned, then cut animal in half. Decades ago, I dated a meat cutter and saw his process. They cut the butchered animal into ribs, steaks, make ground meat, roasts, etc.
Jamey’s first comment is, “I had thought you might be the one.” Something like that, but the word choice and the tense made it very clear that was a past thought and he had given up already on Ari being “the one”. She picked up on that immediately — that he had no interest going forward in romance — because of the word choice and the past tense, and that’s why she shut down completely. And refused to go forward with the interview / conversation. It’s also why she acted like he was the one who broke it off, because he obviously had no interest in the first seconds of that first meeting in going forward. He was very sweet about it, and quite polite, but I never got the feeling that he was comfortable with the idea, or entertained it for a split second at all, whatsoever.