By Lady Cocotte
RuPaul’s Drag Race Recap: The DESPY Awards
In the workroom, the girls are stunned by Pearl’s victory over Trixie Mattel. I don’t blame them. I’m still shocked myself. Pearl is “over” the judges. She clearly isn’t taking their words as constructive criticism. “I think I have great energy,” she declares. Lots of faces at that comment. Behind Pearl’s back the girls get a little more honest about her dubious win. “I gagged,” Katya explained. “I truly gagged.” Mrs Kasha Davis feels let down by Pearl’s attitude. “After trying for this for 7 years and someone is, like, ‘Uh, fuck this.’ That pisses me off.”
MINI-CHALLENGE
The next day, the girls seem refreshed. During her “she done already done had herses” message, RuPaul plugs her Drag Race Maquette (which is just a fancy-ass name for a small statue). She hint at some kind of awards show (which we already know from the title of the episode).
RuPaul tells the girls about a fan that made paper versions of iconic Drag Race looks. They’re actually quite stunning and clever. The mini-challenge has the girls making paper versions of classic celebrity red carpet outfits. I love challenges like these. It’s a chance to really see how creative the girls can be.
The teams are picked by how the girls lined up in front of Ru. Ginger Minj and Kandy Ho will do Lil Kim’s purple boob baring outfit. Jaidynn Diore Fierce and Kennedy Davenport get Lady Gaga’s meat dress. Pearl and Max get Cher’s Oscar belly baring dress and headdress. Mrs Kasha Davis and Katya get Bjork’s swan dress. Violet Chachki and Miss Fame get Jennifer Lopez’s Versace navel-grazer. Violet is pissed because she’s always pissed. Miss Fame tries to hide her annoyance at being stuck with Violet.
The pit crew brings in construction paper, crepe paper and paint. The Queens all turn into giggling schoolgirls at the sight of men in tight undies. RuPaul challenges them to “the best game of frock, paper, scissors EVER.” Theres a lot of ripping and cutting as they work on their masterpieces. I love that they’re using paper to create wigs and accessories too.
First up is Ginger Minj as Lil Kim. She has purple crepe paper taped to her body with a strategically placed boob hanging out. She is too cute. RuPaul can’t resist doing the infamous Diana Ross boob jiggle. “Wonk wonk.” Jaidynn Diore Fierce models a pretty decent version of Gaga’s meat dress. Their paper wig isn’t quite as successful as their dress. Violet Chachki comes out as JLo in Versace. She has the best hair so far and is wearing big, pink paper lips. Miss Fame informs us that “it’s actually VerSnatch.” RuPaul asks to see her back side and Violet runs off in shame for not having JLo’s booty. Max slithers out as Cher. Her headdress is to die for. She’s also making Cher faces. It’s fun to see Max as a character other than Max. Finally, Katya comes out wearing Bjork’s swan dress. They did a fabulous job. Her paper wig is fuller than Bjork’s real hair and the swan looks just as dead as it did on Bjork.
As a challenge bonus, Mrs Kasha Davis dressed as Joan Rivers (not in a paper outfit since making 2 outfits in the timeframe would be next to impossible). She interviews RuPaul (“I’m wearing a custom-made Klein Epstein & Parker suit”) and makes fun of Katya/Bjork. RuPaul makes an old, tired joke: Bjork flew all the way from Iceland for this and boy are her arms tired. “Yes, the rest of her looks tired too,” quips Mrs Kasha Davis/Joan Rivers. “The next thing you’re gonna look like Pearl, honey.” Oh, the shade of it all. The girls all “ooh”, RuPaul laughs but Pearl doesn’t seem pleased.
Although Pearl and Max did a great job with Cher it’s really no surprise that the winning pair is Mrs Kasha Davis and Katya as Joan Rivers and Bjork.
MAXIE-CHALLENGE
RuPaul invites the girls to “the most prestigious award show of the season”: the first annual DESPY awards. #SnatchingTrophies. Working in their current pairs, the girls will be both presenters and nominees. They need funny banter for presenting and great acceptance speeches in case they win.
Jaidynn Diore Fierce and Kennedy Davenport will present “Sexy, Sexy Drag Queen.” Pearl and Max will present “Most Busted Queen.” Ginger Minj and Kandy Ho will present “Shadiest Queen.” And Violet Chachki and Miss Fame will present “Meatiest Tuck.” As the mini-challenge winners, Mrs Kasha Davis and Katya will be the DESPY co-hosts. They look excited and scared. Guest judge Kathy Griffin will help them with their jokes.
Violet Chachki and Miss Fame get to work writing their jokes. Neither of them are comedy Queens so they spend a lot of time staring at each other. Violet tries to offer suggestions but Miss Fame is not impressed. They bicker. Finally Miss Fame suggests, “If you think it’s funny then present it in a funny way.” Uh oh.
Kennedy Davenport feels very confident doing comedy. “I mean, I won last week’s challenge.” Which is true. But she had a lot of help with that win. Her confidence turns a little cocky and all she seems to do is edit Jaidynn Diore Fierce’s jokes. It gets to the point where Jaidynn starts to close down. Not a good sign.
RuPaul meets with Mrs Kasha Davis and Katya. Katya wants to base their hosting on Tina Fey and Amy Poehler at the Golden Globes. Mrs Kasha Davis wants to go the Dean Martin-Jerry Lewis route. Katya isn’t even familiar with who they are so Mrs Kasha Davis promises RuPaul she will “educate this youngster.” “I’m not actually that young,” Katya informs them. “I’m just ignorant.” She’s already cracking Ru up.
RuPaul moves on to Violet Chachki and Miss Fame. Miss Fame brings up how different they are. “She’s dark-sided,” she says of Violet. Violet tries to recover face in front of RuPaul by being positive. It’s a nice break from her usual, nasty attitude.
Ginger Minj has experience hosting shows while her partner Kandy Ho isn’t much of a comedienne. “If a joke or 2 comes out when I’m a little tipsy, it just comes out,” she explains. “But I am not the funny girl.” Their plan is to throw shade. RuPaul advises them to do something special that will stand out.
RuPaul moves on to Pearl and Max. Max explains that their category, Most Busted, will allow them to be a bit more cutting with their jokes. Pearl adds that they plan to be very subtle and sweet, but sharp. RuPaul states that Max has a big personality while Pearl doesn’t. Pearl makes a face. So RuPaul asks Pearl, “how are you going to overcome that for this award?” Pearl won’t really answer. RuPaul keeps pushing Pearl and you can see she’s getting upset. “Well, you kind of, like told me I have no personality,” Pearl says. “I mean, that’s doesn’t feel good or give me confidence.” By now everyone in the room has noticed what’s going on between RuPaul and Pearl. “Well, I’m hoping it will light a fire under your ass,’ Ru explains.
RuPaul just stares at Pearl. The camera keeps switching from Ru to Pearl to Ru to Pearl. It’s intense. I’ve never seen RuPaul get this worked up. She can’t get an emotion other than self-pity out of Pearl and it’s pissing her off. “Is there something on my face?” Pearl asks, smartassedly. Max looks like she wants to run for cover. “I want you to do well,” RuPaul steams. “That’s why I brought your ass here.” RuPaul leaves mad.“I feel very uncomfortable,’ Max mutters. Her job just got a lot harder.
Pearl is visibly shaken but instead of using it to push herself, she’s crumbling under it. Max tries to get her focused on the task of writing but Pearl can’t move on. Instead, she walks out. Max doesn’t know if Pearl will come back. And she doesn’t know how that will affect her team challenge. Eventually, Pearl reenters the workroom. She looks totally defeated. In her TH, Max says, “she knows that if she doesn’t do well tomorrow, she will probably be saying good bye.”
Finally, the girls meet with Kathy Griffin. Kathy knows her comedy and she basically cuts all the girls down a size. Mrs Kasha Davis and Katya need to gay it up. “Gayer!” Kathy yells at them. “More gay!” Jaidynn Diore Fierce and Kennedy rely too heavily on the word “girl.” Violet and Miss Fame are going too blue. Of course, they don’t even know what that means. Kathy enjoys Max and Pearl’s shadiness but warns them to stop directing it at the audience and judges. “It turns into such a shade s***fest, you kind of just end up turning them off.” Ginger Minj and Kandy Ho have stale jokes. “I feel like it’s a couple of Drag Queens throwing the same old shade at each other. Give me something new.” Kathy makes Ginger feel insecure. “I might have to call my momma and have her tell me how good I am.”
And finally, the girls have to vote on who wins the categories. As Katya explains, “whoever wins the award, you get a real sense of what the other Queens think of you.”
As they get ready for the Awards Ceremony, Pearl has come to terms with the idea of possibly leaving. She talks about how lonely and isolated her childhood was. “So, if I can learn here that it’s cool to open up more, ‘come out of your shell, Pearl’, it’ll be a good thing in the end.” I think this is what we call progress. And it couldn’t come too soon.
Miss Fame starts singing about chicken. She grew up on chicken farm and her job was to make them beautiful for the fair. She goes off on her beauty secrets for chickens. I remember in the promos videos, girls were talking about how chickens were going to come up a lot on the show. “Imagine me, about 30 pounds heavier and a big nerd and loving chickens.” And then she clucks like a chicken. Oh, I love this crazy side of Miss Fame. She’s a real wackadoodle under all that pretty.
RUNWAY
The guest judges are Kathy Griffin and Isaac Mizrahi. Ross Matthews is judging tonight and Carson Kressley is still missing.
Instead of a traditional runway, this week they’re simply doing the DESPY awards. Katya and Mrs Kasha Davis start things off. They’re pretty much roasting the other Queens. Their best joke is about Pearl: the Drag equivalent of a Valium taking a Xanax in a K-hole. When they make fun of Violet Chachki, she’s the first to laugh. Damn, she’s starting to act human. Am I going to end up liking Violet Chachki? No, not possible. Both Mrs Kasha Davis and Katya look good but not great. I find Katya’s “glamorous” style pretty boring. Her costumes are more interesting.
Kennedy Davenport and Jaidynn Diore Fierce make fun of themselves. They’re a cute duo. They roast the nominees for “Sexy, Sexy Drag Queen”: Kandy Ho, Miss Fame and Max. Their best joke? “Max? Girl, ain’t that the Queen from that Movie Powder?” Miss Fame wins. Her acceptance speech is kind of funny but RuPaul is the only one really cracking up.
Pearl and Max present the award for “Most Busted Drag Queen.” They both look stunning and Pearl is being pretty damn funny. Nominees are: Jaidynn Diore Fierce, Ginger Minj, Katya, and Mrs Kasha Davis. Jaidynn Diore Fierce wins. The funniest part of her acceptance speech is the microphone that was fitted to Pearl and Max is towering over her.
Ginger Minj and Kandy Ho give out the “Shadiest Shade” award. “Congratulations, Kandy!” Ginger gushes. “I think it’s high time that your beard gets the recognition it deserves.” Ginger is funny and Kandy Ho is beautiful. Nominees are: Ginger Minj, Kennedy Davenport and Violet Chachki. Violet wins. She has a funny acceptance speech. “You don’t like me. you really don’t like me!” Wait a minute, am I starting to like Violet Chachki? No, this episode is just a fluke.
Miss Fame and Violet Chachki present the award for “Meatiest Tuck.” Their blue comedy gets more groans than laughs. Who would have thought? They both look gorgeous. Violet looks great as a red-head. The nominees are: Katya, Jaidynn Diore Fierce and Pearl. Katy wins and she also wins best acceptance speech. “I believe it was the great American painter Bob Ross who said: ‘The key to a swollen vagina is courage.’” Brava, Katya, brava.
Top Queens: Max and Pearl win. Pearl acknowledges what happened in the workroom with RuPaul. “RuPaul, you gave me the smackdown yesterday and… it worked. Thank you. I really appreciate it.”
Bottom Queens: Mrs Kasha Davis, Katya, Ginger Minj, Kandy Ho, Violet Chachki and Miss Fame
Isaac Mizrahii suggests that Mrs Kasha Davis take it more over the top. Michelle Visage thinks Katya needs bigger hair. Michelle Visage thinks everyone in the world needs bigger hair. They love Ginger Minj so she’s only there because her partner was weak. Kandy Ho is gorgeous but couldn’t keep up with Ginger Minj. Violet Chachki looks great but speaks too quickly. Miss Fame was low energy but Isaac thought she was funny. RuPaul makes a pun about oral sex and it goes right over Miss Fame’s head. Almost painfully so.
LIP-SYNC FOR YOUR LIFE
The two Queens up for elimination are Mrs Kasha Davis and Kandy Ho. They perform Lovergirl by Teena Marie.
Mrs Kasha Davis is moving all over the stage but her lip-sync isn’t very precise. Kandy Ho starts slow but as she warms up, she is killing it. She’s a fierce performer. It won’t be easy to win a lip-sync against Kandy Ho. Kandy Ho, shantay, you stay. Mrs Kasha Davis, sashay away.
Next week: Ru Hollywood Stories. And don’t forget to watch Untucked, available every Tuesday. You can watch this week’s episode right here on TamaraTattles.com
I have decided, Officially, this is the season of the young queen. Doesn’t matter how they act Ru is determined to crown a youngin. Maybe it’s to off set the experience we saw last season with Bianca, Courtney, and Adore. Heck, two of those were on Idol. So, it will be one of the little princesses, not yet a queen, and far away from a lady.
Violet, I think is like a fungus, starting to grow on me. Will be back after I get some antibiotics.
I really thought that with Kandy Ho’s bad attitude and lackluster performance, that she would have been the one to go home!
I fell asleep watching this episode during the DESPY awards segment & woke up as Ru told Kandy Ho to Shantay. For me this episode was like a Valium taking a Xanax in a K-hole. I guess I was tired because I watched this after I laughed for 2 hours straight watching Justin Bieber get his twinkie bottom roasted on an open fire.
I would love to see an entire runaway challenge with that paper dress task. If given more time I know those Queens would do something fabulous & polished.
I haven’t watched Untucked yet, so I might be back over here to be a judgmental bitch.
I didn’t watch the show, but to me, it seems like Untucked is like a behind the scenes recap with drinks. Unless Max or was that the no personality one breaks your damn drink. I though the two winners were pretty awesome this week.
I love Untucked because it has very little RuPaul and I’m just over him even if he is from Atlanta.
On Tue, Mar 31, 2015 at 2:11 PM, Tamara Tattles wrote:
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Yay! Max won again. I want her to go far but geez work on the hair. Not liking Mandy Ho and her attitude. If you don’t care one way or the other, then just go. I was sad watching Mrs. Kasha Davis go.
I’m watching Untucked right now & I think that Max is serving Downton Abbey Lady Mary Crawley realness. He really does look like her when he is in drag.
Haha I think you nailed it. Her hair looked too matronly. I like her style but why grey hair?
I think max does grey hair because she is portraying black and white TV. All she wears is black, white and grey.
Those paper dresses were soo good. They are super talented. This is one of the rare competitions where you pray NOT to win the mini challenge. The winners don’t get a prize and get the added pressure of being great. Kasha, Kennedy bottom 2 can’t remember others.
I really like Jaidlynn Fierce. She’s funny and confident. Issac seemed in heaven looking at Miss Fame. Loved Miss Fame fat backstory
RuPaul was acting so strange on WWHL on Sun. He was so zanny and corney. Reminded me of Fire Marshall Bill. Very different from calm lady on Drag Race.
Thanks again Lady Cocoette! Great detail. Wow!
rupaul on wwhl was the real rupaul. He’s having a gay life crisis.
On Tue, Mar 31, 2015 at 3:03 PM, Tamara Tattles wrote:
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This season makes me truly appreciate the skills of Trinity K Bonet. Her lip syncs were so good. I still think about her “What A Man” performance. Wow!
But next year’s Queens can learn from Kandy Ho. She had 3 distiinct stages to her lip sync where as Kasha had one– energy and had nowhere to go. So while blah Kandy Ho earned both her lip sync wins. Wish they edited her better. She seems like she really wants to be there.
DESPY? Desperate.
Boring ass season.
Could not agree more!
Something about Violet I want to like. In my head she had been teased and the super snarky attitude just protects her feelings. Anyway I think there may be someone deep inside that is actually very like able and vulnerable. Maybe not but just a thought. I once again this week did not think that the winners were the best. I liked the duo with Katya. I also thought her acceptance speech landed the best joke. Violet and Fame fell short for me. They were my bottom two. Ru must have heard a lot of backlash about last weeks elimination. He mentioned everyone has to go on Andy. That leads me to believe we weren’t the only ones that thought the wrong person went home.
I KNEW that they were going to save Pearl. It never fails. I am officially over this season. I kinda like Katya and that it is, really. This season is super boring and no one is really that likable.
I could stare at Violet all day long, so pretty. I love Miss Fame too.
Finally, something happened. Ru paul was pissed in her interaction with pearl. Ru looked like she was going to lose it. I don’t know how ru stayed so calm. And then “is there something on my face?” Where was one of ru’s infamous slaps?
I loved ms fame and violets outfits. As well as max and pearl. They paint and dress spectacularly. Ginger is hilarious but at this moment I don’t think she will win. I think a pretty girl will win as the seasoned ones are leaving quickly.
God bless the chickens.
Untucked improved too. I felt like I was watching a group therapy session.
I do not like to watch things on my laptop. I have to have things going on my TV… That said, I’ve watched every bit of every Untucked. 🙂 Or at least listened to it as I type.
On Tue, Mar 31, 2015 at 8:09 PM, Tamara Tattles wrote:
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I would love to be able to apply my eye makeup half as good as these queens (the smoky eye esp.) But I enjoy watching RP DR, most of the queens are very creative with their hair and costumes, and some look better than some women I know.
And they can DEFINETLY walk better in a pair of heels than I can these days, but oh well those were the good old days for me!
I forgot to mention that RuPaul looked especially gorgeous this week…