Oh Crap. I just realized I am two episodes behind on Dance Moms. Sorry. I’m catching up now. I am not excited about the title of this one. It’s time for pyramid and everyone expects it to go well because they beat Cathy and the Candy Apples the week before. However, there pyramid has everyone on one row except for one top spot. Lord knows the top spot will be Maddie and the last spot will be Nia, so lets just see what happens in the middle.
This week the moms are pushing for a non-lyrical routine. This is nonsense because we know that Abby already has the routine selected. Apparently, the girls were asked to list pros and cons about Jo Jo being on the ALDC dance teams. The girls basically tell her that she is loud and sometimes her timing is off, that she takes things away from other dancers. Jo Jo stands there and takes it. Abby gives her an ALDC jacket and promises to let Jo Jo be on the team for the rest of the season. Spoiler Alert, she went to Australia so she is also on the team for next season. Everyone is on the same line of the pyramid because they all did well on the group dance. Maddie is on the top because she is better than anyone in the whole world.
This week they are going to Philadelphia. This competition critiques the performers live on the stage. The group dance is a musical theatre piece called Decadent Darlings. The three soloists are Maddie with a contemporary solo, Kendall who also has a contemporary solo, with a prop. And Nia has a solo called The Color Purple. If she does not place, she may never see another solo. She should do fine, she has a lot of experience with ethnic dances. BECAUSE THAT IS ALL ABBY EVER GIVES HER!
OMG All the girls carry in Louis bags to the competition. Finally, I have actually seen more than one bag in a scene. This has been driving me nuts.
Nia’s solo is shown first. The category here is age 13-14. I can hear the not so subtle theme in my head “All my life, I’ve had to fight…” as Nia does her dance. The music is weird. The choreography is weird. I don’t get it. Lawd knows I’m a Nia fan, but I am not a fan of this solo. Nia gets positive critique from the judges. This is great. She never gets positive feedback from Abby that’s for sure.
Maddie is shown next, she is dancing in the 11-12 age group. So since she is only 12 she is not in the same group as Nia. Maddie’s solo is called The Mannequin and she is carried out on stage by a guy like a prop. It’s kind of creepy already. It was really good and will win first place. It was a cross between the Chandelier video and the Toy Soldier Dance in The Nutcracker. OMG. One of the judges critiquing Maddie calls her out for bent knees. Abby may erupt. Maddie got suggestions for improvement from both judges that critiqued her. Wait, MADDIE ISN’T PERFECT?
Kendall’s performance was cute. One of the judge says she needs to connect more with the audience. The other judge’s critique was retarded and made no sense.
The group dance was adorable. The judges seemed to love them.
Okay the awards that Abby is going to count are the top five OVERALL performances. Oh shit. We are up to top two and no ALDC has been called yet. That means someone did not place in top five. Please don’t let it be Nia. CRAP second place also went to some other team. They had a score of 297+ out of 300! This competition is no joke. Maddie wins first overall. The group won third overall. The points for these scores are UNREAL. Abby says that the moms are to blame for losing the competition because they did not do a lyrical. She also says no more solos for Nia.
Jill throws Holly under the bus with Abby for no reason other than the script.
I’m going to go ahead and knock the other episode out so, grab a snack for the double feature!
In the next episode, Maddie’s second video with SIA , Elastic Heart was released. There were some idiots who freaked out about Maddie dancing with a grown man. Because Maddie’s video was a duet, Abby is entering 3 duets this week. Because? Whatever. It’s Maddie and Kalani, Jo Jo and Kendall, and Nia and MacKenzie.
TMZ calls Cathy for her response to Maddie’s video. Cathy takes the high road and… oh wait. No she doesn’t. Her quote was, “I almost threw up!” Meanwhile Holly compares Aubrey O’Day to Sia. WTF? Then Holly calls Aubrey O’Day during the group dance rehearsal. This causes a conflict between Holly and Melissa. Then Entertainment Tonight shows up to interview Abby and Maddie. Jill says all these disruptions could cause them to lose to Candy Apples.
Candy Apples has a brand new team. It’s all girl who tried and failed to get on the ALDC team. The moms and dance teachers act like fools. Mike Shouhed is shitfaced. Oh wait, wrong show. But I’m sure somewhere Mike Shouhed is shitfaced.
Kendall and Jo Jo are up first. It was a cute dance. Jo Jo stole the dance. They took a bow out of each other’s hair in the dance. Jo Jo practically snatched Kendall bald-headed. Jill says the dance was cute, but does cute win? We all know the answer is no.
Nia and Mackenzie are up next. Even if they win McKenzie will get the credit. IF they lose, it will be Nia’s fault. This duet was way better than Nia’s solo last week. This should place high.
Maddie and Kalani’s duet was lovely. As expected. The will likely win.
The group dance was good. But it wasn’t anything special. There were too many props and the premise wasn’t really clear. The judges may be wondering WTF the deal was with the candelabra and then noose etc. Candy Apples certainly has an opportunity to beat ALDC this week. The Candy Apples group dance looked just like an ALDC group dance without the Maddie feature. They could win.
Kendall and JoJo get third in duets. Nia and MacKenzie came in second. Kalani and Maddie take first.
ALDC group gets first place and Candy Apples gets third place. Cathy thinks they were robbed. I agree to an extent. Cathy trashes Jo Jo and Kendall. Next week Cathy is going to try again. And the ALDC will be without Maddie again.