Okay, it’s time for the finale so I am making some adjustments to recap this live. I took a shower, and put on clean jammies in honor of the first clean sheets night of 2015 (I’ve been sleeping on the couch mostly). After this and Shahs I will likey pile up in my nice clean bedroom for the night and deal with GiGi (and Reza I think, not Kristen 🙁 ) in the morning/afternoon.
It’s time for the annual calendar shoot as all restaurants have each year. The location is cool this year. It’s The Pink Hotel which is so cute and 1950s that it would not surprise me if Lisa buys it before the episode is over. James is super hot in the photo shoot. Yes, little Europeon boy James. He photos very well. I want those one piece 1950s swimsuits. Sort of. I mean if I have to wear a swimsuit.
Sandoval and Jax are always in a lovers quarrel for these things. Scheana just let Sandoval know that Jax is saying he slept with Miami girl. that was sweet of her to do right before they have to pose together. Scheana tell Ariana what Jax said about Miami Girl on a break in filming but Ariana doesn’t believe Sandoval would lie or cheat. LOLOLOL. Um, okay. So he would cheat with you but now on you. I see. Ariana says she texted with Tom all night. She says that Facetime “didn’t work” in his hotel room. Yeah, I dated a guy once whose IM that he was on all day long with me in town “didn’t work” on his work computer he took on business trips. Scheana points out that Eddie would text Brandi a lot when they were dating. Ariana says she is not stupid and she is smarter tan anyone she ever met in her life. Ariana tells Scheana she is sure Tom didn’t cheat. Scheana wisely says she will not bring it up ever again. 
Schwartz is at his counselor discussing proposing to Katie. He’s conflicted.
After the shoot, Sandoval confronts Jax about talking about the Miami Girl. I miss Kristen. Sandoval just said if I were to grab Kristen and bring her over here… why is Kristen at the photoshoot?
Stassi shows up at SUR for something or other and chats with Lisa. Lisa tells Stassi she is not a good friend, especially to Katie. She wants Stassi to come to the party tonight and to talk to Katie and try to make up with her. James has begged Lisa to get Kristen into the party. James makes Kristen promise that after this party she will not continue to cause a commotion with all of his co-workers. It’s like James doesn’t even know who he is dating.
Katie is the first to trash talk the lovely Kristen. As Sandoval and Ariana come in, Kristen is plotting something on her phone. Is she wearing a suicide bomb under that red dress? Stassi comes in and on of the few to hug Kristen. Schwartz did so rather reluctantly earlier. It seems that everyone hates Stassi now. This is taking some of the hate off of Kristen for a bit.
Sandoval is still pissed with Jax. But Vanderpump is still doing her push-pull, insult-flirt thing with Jax. Meanwhile Stassi is completing her assignment to chat with Katie privately. I have been blogging more than looking but it sure is pretty where they are. Perhaps they are at PUMP and not SUR for this party. Stassi wants to know why things have to be so awkward. Katie is like, um but you are such a cunt. She says that Stassi doesn’t take an interest in anyone but herself. Stassi in her talking head says that Katie is now the host body for the parasite that is Scheana. Stassi tries the fake cry but Katie is not buying into it. Stassi, have no other tricks up her sleeve walks away.
Vail flirts with Jax hard right in front of Peter and then flounces off. Lisa and Kristen have a conversation. Lisa just loves to lecture Kristen. You can’t lecture crazy Lisa. You just have to love it or leave it. Lisa stupidly tells Kristen she needs to make things right with Tom and Ariana. Lisa also tries to keep Stassi at the party when Jax arrives. She is the one that sturs all the shit. Okay, they are at SUR, it just seemed like there was a lot of foliage in restaurant for the party. Anyway, Stassi slinks away from the party, a loser. everyone mocks her. It’s a TV show sendoff that says that she will not be back again, ever.
Sandoval wants to have it out with Jax once and for all. Now he says that Jax is trying to break up Sandoval and Scwartz and Sandoval and Ariana. Jax lies. Kristen comes out and says that Jax did in fact told everyone that Sandoval banged Miami Girl. Sandoval says mean shit to Kristen again and it seems like she gets it. She gets up and goes inside to be with her boyfriend. She tells Ariana good luck and runs off with James. Sandoval makes everything going on with him and Ariana about Kristen. He’s super good at deflecting all of his actions onto Kristen. Because Kristen is fucking nuts. Sandoval asks Ariana to move in with him she says yes!
Schwatz and Katie talk privately. Katie puts the clamps on Schwartz. Katie gives him a six month ultimatum or she is out.
Lisa debuts the photo shoot for the year. Kristen leaves first and goes home to fuck her bus boy. Jax goes home alone. His truck was towed. Time to call Uber.
Pretty much tied up of loose ends for the season. Schenna married, Katie has grown a set, Tom 2 has been put on notice, Tom 1 and Arianna have managed to weather the storm, Stassi slips away with her tail between her legs, and Jax’s truck is towed and he is left wandering around alone in the parking lot. And poor, poor James is right where he started the season. I especially enjoyed Stassi and Jax’s final scenes. Karma, baby, karma.
Wow! You could write for Tv Guide. Great synopsis in one paragraph.
(Btw, is TV Guide still around? )
Jax is like those boys in high school that dont like when their friends get in relationships because they cant party with them anymore. They then try to screw up their friends relationships. Men rarely snitch about cheating aka the Bro Code. Either that is why Jax did it or Jax wants Tom for himself.
yup.
TT did you notice that Tom S was crying after he was given the ultimatum?
umm how could you not notice. He pointed it out.
So, anyone believe Jaxs car really got towed or that production did it?
Does anyone believe he really brushed off “make out slut” Vail? She was trying to go hone with Jax, from what I saw.
PS: I guess Vail was supposed to make a splash, but all she did was talk about her coke problem. Useless addition to the cast.
Maybe she’s being set up as Kristen’s replacement for next season? I can see Vail going a little psycho!
I dunno, I kind of like Vail. Despite her appearance/demeanor, she seemingly has a mature, down to earth, ‘one of the fellas’ kind of personality. Doesn’t take herself too seriously. She’s like a nice, neutral counter balance to the shrieking drama queens.
I was bery disappointed with Vail. I really thought she’d bring the craxy. Fingers crossed for next year.
for some reason i thought sandoval and ariana already lived together, hmm. i can see why scheana is tryiong to help her friend but she was right to give it a rest, who cares who did who when and all if ariana could care less. and she really isn’t smarter than anyone she has ever met she is just a bit more aware than most. she gets that there are things in life that just are, like she is zen or some shit. i totally love that stassi got her ass handed to her. loved it and the clip formt he reunion was epic. i cannot wait to see that feeding frenzy. jax is a douche’ , why crazy kristen even thought jax was telling the truth is beyond me, he lies all the time. i did love the photo shoot, they are all great and lisa does have great vision
I don’t think Lisa will buy that pink hotel…I happened to drive by the hotel last week looking for the FedEx hub in Sun Valley Ca. it’s on San Fernando Rd in a really bad part of town…nothing around the area but old beat up tire garages and autos…not her cup of tea..it weird becuz I just happened to notice it cuz it sticks out like a sore thumb..it must be a landmark or something
Thanks TT for finally acknowledging how HOT James is!!
Um, Yuck.
Um, GAG! He looks like a blond headed Pee-Wee Herman!!
His pictures are nice though – he is delusional, but his pictures were hot.
I agree with TT on this one. Never thought James was even remotely attractive last season, but his looks matured a bit this season. He is really young compared to the rest of the cast. Then I watched the photo shoot and thought, he looks really hot in these scenes. Who knows, he may turn out to be very good looking after he reaches puberty. 🙂
He has interesting bone structure and is photogenic but the men (boys?) all have those scrawny chicken legs. I also bet they’re all under 5′ 7″.
Ohh please don’t ruin my fantasy.. In my mind James is at least 6 ft
Gah — “men” crying, Tom Sandavol can’t quit Jax (he also can’t look Ariana in the eyes when he asks her to move in with him).
I’m so glad the season is over, because I just can’t with these fools.
Asking Ariana to move in with him minutes after the confrontation with Jax and Kristen was an obvious deflection from being busted for cheating with “Miami girl” He was drowning and needed life line. It’s a shame Ariana wasn’t “bright” enough to see that. She obviously doesn’t know very many “smart people” if she’s the smartest person she’s ever met! lol
Noooo, it was an obvious “gotcha!”:
“I’ve enjoyed being with you so much, blah blah blah, Arianna, I wanted to ask you something: will you mmmmmm-move in with me?”
And we were supposed to think a “Will you marry me?” was coming.
And when will people catch on? Arianna staying with Tom = screen time = smart aspiring actress.
I guess it’s pretty clear Stassi won’t be returning. She refuses to even reconcile. I’m no Stassi fan but I understand to some degree. Once you’ve been dealt with consistent gossip and drama among the same group of people you wanna put some distance between you and them. And when you experience such drama free peace its easy to stay away from it. Although she was a big part of the gossip and drama when she was there, being away from it helps you realize you’re better off without it but what she did to Katie was wrong
Um, are we watching the same Stassi? She didn’t stay away from it. At all.
These people weren’t knocking down her door. She kept going to Sur, she kept gossiping about the same old shit, she got angry at people she wasn’t even interacting with, she sat there during Schaena’s wedding, monitoring all social media for up-to-the-minute pictures and posts so she could talk shit about them. I don’t think I need to give more examples.
Katie decided to be friendly with her co-workers, “finding peace” followed. If anyone believes Stassi found peace, even in her brief trip to NYC, then I think I see pigs flying. That bitch needs to mooooove onnnnnn.
Could swear Schaena tilted her head to the left and said she didn’t know Eddie was like marriedddah.
could have been a hind sight recollection maybe. i had the same thought though. at this point it doesn’t matter, sheana is married and eddie is married and brandi is still living in jilted wife hell.
I’m pretty sure this more or less confirmed that Schaena has been lying this whole time. She’s sworn up and down that she had no idea that Eddie wasn’t married or that she knew how to use google.
until later in their relationship. Why do you idiots always forget that she found out while they were dating…
On Tue, Mar 3, 2015 at 7:20 PM, Tamara Tattles wrote:
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Stassi, Jax, and Schwartz, need to grow up. Scheana needs a damn voice coach or just learn to speak in sign language. Her voice is nauseating. ugh! Ariana and Katie are the most t mature acting ones on there imo. Sandoval should try to keep his act together and stop telling Jax everything. he knows Jax is a compulsive gossip, at this point I don’t think he can help it and he doesn’t feel any remorse at all about what he does. Stassi deserved exactly what she got. She acted like everything was supposed to revolve around her, and that SHE was always owed an apology for some perceived disloyalty from her ‘minions’, please. Kristen Kristen, Kristen. In the dictionary if you look up diabolically crazy, you will see a picture of Kristen, and TT I only mean that in the “nicest way”. 🙂
Dead on. Every single word. And yes, diabolically awesomely crazy!
I’m with you about Scheana’s voice … I always hit the mute button during her talking heads. That nasal sound is so irritating.
Wendy Williams does a great imitation of California girl speak (usually in regards to a Kardashian). She has Scheana covered. She sounds like a moron and is about as real as a three dollar bill. I feel sorry for hen-pecked Shay. Does that guy speak more than once a year? I don’t think that James is cute and his eyes are too close together. Sandoval is weird and so is Schwartz. They are acting their way through life and who knows if they are straight or gay or somewhere in-between. Jax is ridiculous and he and Lisa always seem to be in on some inside joke together. He is most definitely the star of the show and Lisa knows it. No one in their right mind would remain friends with someone who acted like him so it has to be producer induced. Ariana is weird and I hate it when she and Sandoval kiss. It’s so mushy and odd looking. I think that she is asa delusional as Kristen only in a different way. Kristen…TT said it all. Same goes for Stassi….what a send off. If I were her I’d move to an island somewhere and hide.
Scheanna’s voice to me, is fingernails across a blackboard! Dear God, Why doesn’t someone tell her that? I honestly think she purposely speaks in that dialect. Because, every once in awhile she will speak a word or sentence that suprisingly will sound somewhat normal. It’s a new valley girl. She was once quoted in an article declaring her love in the way Kortney Kardashian speaks. So their you go!
Yeah Scheana has that whole vocal fry thing going on. Nails on a chalkboard..
I think Jax is just playing a big game-conveniently forgetting conversations, lying etc..He wants to be the villain on the show and if he has to throw his friends – Tom 1 and 2, under the bus, so be it. What’s amazing is that they’re too stupid to realize it and keep treating him like a, “real friend”.
Oh, and those 50s pictures they took were great, they all looked really good!
the two people who looked the best in the photo shoot…Katie! That 50’s look really great on her, makes me just about completely forget about the time she was gonna go blonde but it ended up being orange days, not to mention she had as what Tyra Banks would say a natural booty tooch in her daisy dukes, I was like wow. Schwartz should propose to her on that alone. Also who looked AMAZING in that photo shoot…freakin JAMES…he looked just like JAMES DEAN bad ass, smoking and not caring. I was like wow he really is photogenic, color me highly impressed!
I don’t watch the show as a rule because I’ve always associated it to a younger crowd. I saw a pic of Jax (and his stupid boy toy spelling of that) recently that said he’s 38. He’s been an immature, partying, thinks-hes-a-stud thinking he’s a model awaiting his big break…and he’s practically 40! Ridiculous and I only wonder if the others are late 30s too?
most of the rest of the staff is Late 20’s and Early 30’s. the youngest one is James and I believe he’s 22.
He’s 35, I think. Kristen and Sandoval are also in their 30s.
Jax claims to be 35 but he looks a bit older to me, closer to 40. He’s like one of the guys in that old movie Carnal Knowledge
Boooo, my dvr cut the show off before Jax and the towed truck. Thanks, TT, for a great recap and letting me know what happened. How long ago did the show actually end filming–wondering how many more months Tom Schwartz has before Katie ditches him (I hope). She really can do a whole lot better. Kristen claims she is letting go, and she and James walk happily off into the night (turn on Psycho theme).
Or the theme from Jaws.
Jaws theme works as well. 🙂
Katie will be pregnant and they will announce their engagement on the reunion. Bank on it.
http://s17948.p858.sites.pressdns.com/2015/02/03/katie-maloney-and-tom-schwartz-on-wwhl-is-katie-pregnant/
On Tue, Mar 3, 2015 at 3:24 AM, Tamara Tattles wrote:
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If it’s true then that sucks. Don’t want to offend anyone but I just don’t believe that’s a good way to solidify a relationship. I’m assuming it just “happened” and wasn’t planned but either way-Tom 2 is just not that into Katie. If you don’t know after 4 years that you want to be with someone, it’s time to move on. That being said, if it turns out to be true-I hope it works out for the kids sake.
Katie did look glowing and plump on that WWHL. Crossing fingers. That would be wonderful if Schwartz proposes on the reunion show.
I’m thinking Kristen might also be engaged….
James does photograph well, but he still looks like an anorexic Muppet all the rest of the time.
True. But the photos were amazing. I was shocked. Was it the stylist?
On Tue, Mar 3, 2015 at 8:20 AM, Tamara Tattles wrote:
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Very well could have been the stylist, since we know it wasn’t Stassi!
This show had much to recap, so I don’t blame you, but how did you miss the greatest lines of the night: the “So long, Stassi…” compilation. Schwartz won with, “So long Stassi, and your dumb statement necklaces!”
I died. Best ever.
I feel like Vail was kind of a useless addition this season.
I was just going to ask if anybody liked Vail. I thought at first I might but she quickly got on my nerves- I found her a bit of a c-k tease- I dunno, maybe those guys deserve it.
She just doesn’t fit in-maybe that’s a good thing…
Over Ariana! I wonder why she didn’t attend Harvard, MIT, Princeton, or even Berkley? Why isn’t she using her gift of intellect to save the world from green house effect, solving the peace issue in the middle east, finding a cure for cancer, or at least figuring out a way to be a serious actress by now?
If Ariana is smarter than anyone she has ever met—- what is she doing with Sandoval?
No one on this show is exactly Mensa material.
Well….we’ve all seen the company she surrounds herself with so it is indeed possible she is the, “smartest”…I’m not sure it’s something she should brag about though.
I believe the saying goes, “If you are the smartest person in the room, you are in the wrong room.”
Or as I like to say it, “It’s not that I’m so damn smart, it’s just that all of you fucks be stupid.”
On Tue, Mar 3, 2015 at 12:18 PM, Tamara Tattles wrote:
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Hi, I Really Do Believe That Tom # 2 Did Cheat In Miami, And That Jax Was Telling The Truth. I Also Believe That Everyone Except Jax Is In Total 100% Denial, And Are Always Using Poor Jax As The Scape Goat. And I Also Love How They All Act Like They Really Love Jax, But I Don’t Believe That For 1 Minute. I’m Very Happy That Jax Got His Revenge, Against Those Phony Bolognies, That’s For Sure!!!!
I just watched this and am I crazy or did Scheana basically out Tom and Ariana? Didn’t she say something like what about what was going on with Tom and you all this time, when they were discussing if Tom cheated or not? Man, they are all such KIDS!! Deflection, whining and lies galore. And Ariana is coming off as so smug – good luck girl. Oh and bye, Stassi.
Yes, she outed them. Ariana will get hers. Cheat with a man and he will cheat on you.
Yeah, I cracked up when I heard that.
Katie zoomed from orange haired oompa loompa to the hottest girl on the show in one season.
Congrats!
I totally agree with Tamara, Katie made the decision for Tom2 and got pregnant and now they’ll be getting married…eventually. I really hope Jax’s car getting towed was for real, and not for the show, because it was priceless. And clearly everyone hates Stassi, including Andy Cohen, because he seemed absolutely giddy about everyone ganging up on her at the reunion.
I can’t wait for the freaking reunion.
Kristen finally realizing that it’s o-v-e-r with Tom was a great moment.
James is cute like my pet Iguana. So odd but yet mysteriously unique looking at the same time.
@FarFromPerfekt now that you mention it, he does sort of remind me of an iguana. I was thinking of some cartoon character or some alien from one of the star trek shows….but iguana works. And I like James, just feel sorry for him being sucked in by Kristen. I don’t really think she likes anybody, not even herself. She and Stassi do have that hatred thing in common though.
I have a few really smart friends and none of them constantly remind me of how smart they are. Just sayin…
Yeahhh, nothing says I love you like staring at your shoes and mumbling about how wonderful someone has made your life. He could not even look his fake girlfriend in the eye. Tom Sandoval is a joke. And if Ariana thinks she is smarter than most people she meets, she needs to get a better set of friends ‘cause she definitely is not all that. She and Tom look so fake to me. Is this even a real relationship? Or is it cobbled up for reality tv? So as the drama folds up, I have to wonder what Tom and Ariana could possibly have for a story line now? Their whole story line has been that Kristen was trying to destroy them. Now she has walked away. Tom is even more self involved than Jax, and Ariana is boring. All of Tom’s hatefulness to Kristen gets him … what? It gets him no story line. They have NOTHING. Really, a guy whose main concerns are his hair and makeup wears thin. Only a moron like Ariana could stand that. No wonder Kristen cheated. I watched Jax in an earlier episode when Tom was lecturing him about friendship. Jax had enough of Sandoval’s bs, in my opinion. Sandoval needs to learn not to insult people about cheating and lying when, yeah, he is the leader in those areas. I think Jax told the truth because Sandoval just pissed him off with his insults. Stupid stupid Sandoval and Ariana.
Have to say that out of all of them, Stassi and Kristen are the only ladies that have to strong sense of style. Stassi really rocked the LBD and Kristen really rocked the LRD. Scheana showed up in her typical crop top and that thing Ariana wore was strange and unflattering. Katie did not do herself justice in her outfit. Aren’t these women being paid enough to hire a stylist to help them?
Yeah, Vail is pretty weird. I think her story line next season will be playing Peter and Jax against each other.
Thank you , thank you, and thanks, I very much agree on all of your points.
Do you think Kristen ever really walks away..?
Yes, I think she will. And I think next season, if she is still on the show, you will see Tom trying to get her back. After all, he has nothing.
Stassi sucks. I can’t wait to watch everyone gang up on her at the reunion.
The pics were gorgeous.
Can’t believe I fell for Ariana as the smart Angel. Will I never learn?
If both Stassi and Kristen are floating around the periphery and no longer working at SUR, what’s the point? They’re the only entertaining people on the show. It looks like I’m the only one around this site who actually likes Stassi. Well, not like as in I want to hang around her. Like, as in her talking heads make me laugh. I always assumed her antics were part of the story line. I don’t see her caring if the ex-friends were mocking her as she left. I think the point she has been trying to make is that she chooses to stay away from people that she thinks are liars and cheaters. I get why she was hurt that Katie let her find out about the decision to go to Miami Scheana. That was kind of a crappy move. (Although I don’t understand why she cut Katie off completely.) Did Katie really want to participate, or was it to ensure that Schwartz didn’t cheat on her? I wonder if she already knew something about Schwartz cheating on Katie in the past (from big-mouth Jax).
I had to laugh when after Tom said goodbye to Stassi and her stupid statement necklaces, the next talking head was Scheana in a statement necklace! Then again, it seems a little odd that Tom knows what a statement necklace is.
I started off liking Arianna, but now I find her annoying. And condescending. Maybe I’m just not “smart” enough to appreciate her.
If Bravo tries to make Scheana next season’s star, I will be out. I won’t be able to stomach too much more of her Karshashian way of talking (I think it’s called “vocal fry”). Who knew valley girl speak could get even more annoying?
You are not alone, Stassi is my favorite, then Kristen. I agree with you about everything you said. I think Katie just wants to be in the popular clique, possibly just to stay on the show. Katie is just one of girls who follows the most popular girl around. She doesn’t want to miss out. I think Stassi cut her out because she doesn’t want Katie telling all her enemies her business, because Katie so would do that.
I felt like Arianna was about to say she was the smartest person in the world but she checked herself. To me that makes her way crazier than Kristen. Scheana outed herself! How could she know Eddie was texting Brandi when they were together if she did not know Eddie was married to Brandi! Like, duh…
He fed her the line that he was going to get a divorce.
I feel like Stasi exited with class. This is may be a very unusual example of seeing someone mature in a good way on a reality t.v. show, instead of moving towards more famewhoredom and changing like Tamara from oc.
You are funny as hell!! Keep it up!
One quick thing….didn’t Scheanna always say she didn’t know Eddie was married when she was screwing him?..on tonight’s episode she said he was always texting Brandi when she was with him….hhmmmm??
So, Stassi looks very, um, “healthy” in her one on ones. Especially in that black and white dress. Is that a pregnancy or is she just fat and happy with her new beau? I think she looks really good actually, she was too bony before. And Ariana’s smarter than everyone she’s ever met?? LOL girl, you can’t say things like that when you are a bartender!*
*No disrespect to bartenders. You are my favorite people in the whole world. But you’re not curing cancer.
Oh and Tamara, I know what you mean about clean sheets and clean jammies. Best sleep ever! Thanks for another great season of recapping these fools!
I just thought Arianna was frustrated when she said that. I didn’t take it like she mean it literally.
There’s no show without crazy Kristen. The rest of these folks are dull. They look great in photos — but I don’t find them interesting at all, unless they are dealing with Kristen’s crazy.
Best photo shoot of all.they all looked so good.katie just beautifull, best watch out tom.
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